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The Game

Blogs > ToKoreaWithLove
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ToKoreaWithLove
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Norway10161 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-21 02:56:04
March 21 2008 02:48 GMT
#1
[image loading]

image by Jeff Bauche

The basics are as simple as sitting down: You meet a girl, and somehow you see something in the other person. Call it a spark, faith or love at first sight. You don't really know why, but out of the last 100 people you've met there is something special that calls out to you.

So you decide to do it. You ask for a date and her number, and you get it. You feel like a winner for once.
The date is great, you share a bottle of wine and a nice meal. You both have a great time. You dare a kiss before she jumps into the cab and she smiles.

Getting here was the hard part. You date was great, and you can't wait to talk to her tomorrow and have another date soon.



Error! You lost the Game!



The stupid Game. Love it or hate it, you have to play it. Be James Bond and pretend you don't really care. Don't send that pink teddybear, go out drinking with your buddies instead. Leave her hanging for a bit.

I hate it. I want to smother a girl with love, I don't want to sit on a bag of ice cubes and lock the mobile away so I don't send her 30 sms where I tell her how beautiful she is. I want to send those sms, and then call her to continue. I want to do a spontaneous visit and bring coffe from Starbucks so we can cuddle in her sofa and have silly laughts. And most of all I don't want to have butterflies in my stomach because I don't know if she's gonna blow me off because I, despite my carefully chosen words, scared her with my rush of emotions.

So I'm James Bond. I dress up, I fix my hair. I make appointments with other people and hang out with my friends, feeling a bit distant because my mind is elsewhere. Emotions are tumbling, happy one second and scared the next.

And I play the Game. We can twist people around if we put our minds to it. If she suddenly shows a lack of interrest I can send her a very carefully written message that gives her no power over me but leaves her thinking and very often coming back. If she calls too early I have the "upper hand" and can get her into bed very easy. If other guys show an interrest that is usually easy to fix. The Game abuses basic human emotions and instincts, and you can play them like a violin.

Why do we do it? To protect ourself from hurt. To not go all-in. To have an easy exit. To not scare people away. Simply to have a fair chance with a person you are falling in love with.

I hate the Game, but not enough to not play it.

****
ModeratorFather of bunnies
HamerD
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United Kingdom1922 Posts
March 21 2008 02:58 GMT
#2
lol. How many relationships have you been in? It's probably your star sign btw , and there are loads of girls who love the sort of ridiculously obssessive over-clammy types who hate playing the game too :D
"Oh no, we've drawn Judge Schneider" "Is that bad?" "Well, he's had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog" "You did?" "Yeah...if you replace the word *kinda* with *repeatedly*...and the word *dog* with son"
tiffany
Profile Joined November 2003
3664 Posts
March 21 2008 03:00 GMT
#3
nicely put
ToKoreaWithLove
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Norway10161 Posts
March 21 2008 03:02 GMT
#4
On March 21 2008 11:58 HamerD wrote:
lol. How many relationships have you been in? It's probably your star sign btw , and there are loads of girls who love the sort of ridiculously obssessive over-clammy types who hate playing the game too :D


Well .. about 5 serious relationships? I don't mind doing the game a little if I'm out clubbing and want a one-nighter, but I mind when I'm suffering from sweaty hands and actually care how it goes
ModeratorFather of bunnies
HamerD
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United Kingdom1922 Posts
March 21 2008 03:08 GMT
#5
ahh haha yes. Single minded and over thinking everything probably :D? I know what it's like .
"Oh no, we've drawn Judge Schneider" "Is that bad?" "Well, he's had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog" "You did?" "Yeah...if you replace the word *kinda* with *repeatedly*...and the word *dog* with son"
Equinox_kr
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
United States7395 Posts
March 21 2008 03:09 GMT
#6
beautiful ..
^-^
Tracil
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
Australia505 Posts
March 21 2008 03:13 GMT
#7
The Game always seemed such a cynical view of relationships and life to me, and yet I know it's effective, sometimes disturbingly so. I know exactly what you mean. :/
Shooting
semioldguy
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
United States7488 Posts
March 21 2008 03:28 GMT
#8
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far.
Moderator
pyrogenetix
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
China5098 Posts
March 21 2008 03:49 GMT
#9
i hate the game but i tried it and it really works. that's what i'm so disgusted about. i feel like i have this slimey fucking rank mask over me trying to be sly pulling stupid "im fuckin cool" jokes and acting like a douche but it really works.

i too hate it but not enough to not do it when it counts.
Yea that looks just like Kang Min... amazing game sense... and uses mind games well, but has the micro of a washed up progamer.
SweeTLemonS[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
11739 Posts
March 21 2008 04:08 GMT
#10
It's just one-itis. You'll get over it.
I'm never gonna know you now \ But I'm gonna love you anyhow.
yubee
Profile Blog Joined May 2006
United States3826 Posts
March 21 2008 04:12 GMT
#11
would read again 5/5
SweeTLemonS[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
11739 Posts
March 21 2008 04:17 GMT
#12
On March 21 2008 12:28 semioldguy wrote:
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far.


Eventually, you'll have to. If you don't, you'll probably get LJBF'ed.
I'm never gonna know you now \ But I'm gonna love you anyhow.
Titusmaster6
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States5937 Posts
March 21 2008 04:33 GMT
#13
I thought this was gonna be about The Game like the rapper, but then I saw TKWL and I thought, "maybe this is about his girlfriend thing again."

Glad to hear you're doing better in any case.
Shorts down shorts up, BOOM, just like that.
decafchicken
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States20152 Posts
March 21 2008 04:49 GMT
#14
On March 21 2008 12:49 pyrogenetix wrote:
i hate the game but i tried it and it really works. that's what i'm so disgusted about. i feel like i have this slimey fucking rank mask over me trying to be sly pulling stupid "im fuckin cool" jokes and acting like a douche but it really works.

i too hate it but not enough to not do it when it counts.

i'm more fascinated by it than disgusted about it. When i see something i put into plan with the expected reaction...i'm just in awe of how the game works. call it manipulation, i call it fun.
how reasonable is it to eat off wood instead of your tummy?
semioldguy
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
United States7488 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-21 05:12:45
March 21 2008 05:06 GMT
#15
On March 21 2008 13:17 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 21 2008 12:28 semioldguy wrote:
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far.


Eventually, you'll have to. If you don't, you'll probably get LJBF'ed.


Eh, It's been fine in the past. I've never been LJBF'ed either. If it doesn't go along how I think it should be at anytime I usually JLIG. I think a lot of it depends on the girl or type of girl you go after.
Moderator
SweeTLemonS[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
11739 Posts
March 21 2008 05:12 GMT
#16
On March 21 2008 14:06 semioldguy wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 21 2008 13:17 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
On March 21 2008 12:28 semioldguy wrote:
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far.


Eventually, you'll have to. If you don't, you'll probably get LJBF'ed.


Eh, It's been fine in the past. I've never been LJBF'ed either. I think a lot of it depends on the girl or type of girl you go after.


That's very true. I actually know a couple of girls who are fairly nonreactive to guys "gaming" them, and prefer the AFC type guy.
I'm never gonna know you now \ But I'm gonna love you anyhow.
conCentrate9
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States438 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-21 05:25:00
March 21 2008 05:24 GMT
#17
I'm so far past the game right now... and loving it.

Yeah there's the fear of getting hurt but I have to let my guard down and hope, trust... It truly does depend on the type of girl though.

Edit: very nice writeup by the way
semioldguy
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
United States7488 Posts
March 21 2008 05:24 GMT
#18
I don't consider myself an AFC though. I'm plenty confident and never had a lot of trouble.
Moderator
SweeTLemonS[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
11739 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-21 05:28:10
March 21 2008 05:25 GMT
#19
On March 21 2008 14:24 semioldguy wrote:
I don't consider myself an AFC though. I'm plenty confident and never had a lot of trouble.


I didn't mean you were. I meant I know girls who prefer AFCs.

On March 21 2008 14:24 conCentrate9 wrote:
I'm so far past the game right now... and loving it.

Yeah there's the fear of getting hurt but I have to let my guard down and hope, trust... It truly does depend on the type of girl though.

Edit: very nice writeup by the way


There is no "past the game". It's just a different part of the game. Look at Style, he's totally let his guard down, and he has a beautiful woman at his side, in a totally committed LTR. It's just a different type of game. The game isn't about playing mind games, only the very early stages are about playing games. After that, it's about actually getting to know people. You can't have a relationship with someone if all you do is play games with them, eventually you must get to know them on a more intimate level. The thing is, you can't just dump that all out on someone right away. That's the difference in good LTR game, and bad LTR game.
I'm never gonna know you now \ But I'm gonna love you anyhow.
lIlIlIlIlIlI
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
Korea (South)3851 Posts
March 21 2008 06:38 GMT
#20
--- Nuked ---
Last Romantic
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States20661 Posts
March 21 2008 06:47 GMT
#21
I don't game, knowing that I'll get screwed over.

Aren't I silly.
ㅋㄲㅈㅁ
semioldguy
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
United States7488 Posts
March 21 2008 06:51 GMT
#22
On March 21 2008 15:38 randomKo_Orean wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 21 2008 14:24 semioldguy wrote:
I don't consider myself an AFC though. I'm plenty confident and never had a lot of trouble.


Lucky you.
I got LGBF'ed D:


Really? You seem like someone who would do well in getting a girl. And of course now that I mentioned it I'll probably get LJBF'ed now.

and LR... that is very silly.
Moderator
Last Romantic
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States20661 Posts
March 21 2008 07:10 GMT
#23
yeah

I have such a serious case of one-itis

ㅋㄲㅈㅁ
ToKoreaWithLove
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Norway10161 Posts
March 21 2008 09:29 GMT
#24
On March 21 2008 13:33 Titusmaster6 wrote:
I thought this was gonna be about The Game like the rapper, but then I saw TKWL and I thought, "maybe this is about his girlfriend thing again."

Glad to hear you're doing better in any case.


Thank you That is thing is going surprisingly well.
ModeratorFather of bunnies
ToKoreaWithLove
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Norway10161 Posts
March 21 2008 09:31 GMT
#25
Damn guys, I don't know what LJBF or even one-itis means
ModeratorFather of bunnies
paper
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
13196 Posts
March 21 2008 10:22 GMT
#26
stupid acronyms >:{

AFC = avg frustrated chump
LTR = long-term relationship
JLIG = just let it go
LJBF = let's just be friends
Hates Fun🤔
Yizuo
Profile Joined December 2004
Germany1537 Posts
March 21 2008 11:07 GMT
#27
Well written!
I'm kinda like you TKWL, if I meet someone special I want to show her my love very badly, but I dont cause girls often dont like it.. It's a shame, but what can we do....
freelander
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
Hungary4707 Posts
March 21 2008 11:50 GMT
#28
On March 21 2008 19:22 paper wrote:
stupid acronyms >:{

AFC = avg frustrated chump
LTR = long-term relationship
JLIG = just let it go
LJBF = let's just be friends


thanks

anyway, I'd add :

IAYH - I appreciate you as a human
And all is illuminated.
niteReloaded
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Croatia5282 Posts
March 21 2008 12:18 GMT
#29
sadly, the game works. its almost dissapointing.
its like a formula that almost every girl will respond to. And when you meet the special one, and find out that the game works on her aswell, well, its kinda depressing.

Im guessing thats why Style got hooked on Lisa so badly, she didnt respond to his plays, she loved the AFC underneath it all. Anyway, they're not a couple anymore.
freelander
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
Hungary4707 Posts
March 21 2008 14:34 GMT
#30
I hate playing the game.. I know it works, but I've never done it, never will, and hence I'll never succeed
And all is illuminated.
Response
Profile Blog Joined April 2004
United States1936 Posts
March 21 2008 14:54 GMT
#31
its just dating, its not the end of the world =-O
the REAL ReSpOnSe
Response
Profile Blog Joined April 2004
United States1936 Posts
March 21 2008 14:56 GMT
#32
and when i first started dating my girl she loved when i sent her 30 texts about how beautiful she is....it just depends on the girls personality
the REAL ReSpOnSe
JohnnyCash
Profile Joined February 2006
France244 Posts
March 21 2008 15:07 GMT
#33
A first step would be to let go of these stupid acronyms. Christ! esoterism is ridiculous most of the time, but when it comes to dating girls, it becomes absolutely silly.
ToKoreaWithLove
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Norway10161 Posts
March 21 2008 15:14 GMT
#34
On March 21 2008 23:56 GoSuPlAyEr wrote:
and when i first started dating my girl she loved when i sent her 30 texts about how beautiful she is....it just depends on the girls personality


Yea but you never know If you were unlucky you could have scared her away right then
ModeratorFather of bunnies
Elric
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United Kingdom1327 Posts
March 21 2008 15:53 GMT
#35
On March 22 2008 00:07 JohnnyCash wrote:
A first step would be to let go of these stupid acronyms. Christ! esoterism is ridiculous most of the time, but when it comes to dating girls, it becomes absolutely silly.


Too true. Half the comments here sound like relationship advice crossed with SC build orders :S

...Waits patiently for mass-Gaming and/or cheesy build order jokes...
merz
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
Sweden2760 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-21 16:23:12
March 21 2008 16:22 GMT
#36
When I read the replies to this blog, I felt that I had accidently stumbled into Mysterys lounge for a second.
Winners never quit, quitters never win.
SweeTLemonS[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
11739 Posts
March 21 2008 17:06 GMT
#37
On March 21 2008 18:31 ToKoreaWithLove wrote:
Damn guys, I don't know what LJBF or even one-itis means


A disorder commonly found in AFCs, that forces them to think that one chick is so special that they'll do ANYTHING to get into her panties. The most common cure for this disease is to go out and fuck a Baker's Dozen of other chicks to see that one piece isn't that special.

I took that from another site.
I'm never gonna know you now \ But I'm gonna love you anyhow.
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