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Norway10161 Posts
image by Jeff Bauche
The basics are as simple as sitting down: You meet a girl, and somehow you see something in the other person. Call it a spark, faith or love at first sight. You don't really know why, but out of the last 100 people you've met there is something special that calls out to you.
So you decide to do it. You ask for a date and her number, and you get it. You feel like a winner for once.
The date is great, you share a bottle of wine and a nice meal. You both have a great time. You dare a kiss before she jumps into the cab and she smiles.
Getting here was the hard part. You date was great, and you can't wait to talk to her tomorrow and have another date soon.
Error! You lost the Game!
The stupid Game. Love it or hate it, you have to play it. Be James Bond and pretend you don't really care. Don't send that pink teddybear, go out drinking with your buddies instead. Leave her hanging for a bit.
I hate it. I want to smother a girl with love, I don't want to sit on a bag of ice cubes and lock the mobile away so I don't send her 30 sms where I tell her how beautiful she is. I want to send those sms, and then call her to continue. I want to do a spontaneous visit and bring coffe from Starbucks so we can cuddle in her sofa and have silly laughts. And most of all I don't want to have butterflies in my stomach because I don't know if she's gonna blow me off because I, despite my carefully chosen words, scared her with my rush of emotions.
So I'm James Bond. I dress up, I fix my hair. I make appointments with other people and hang out with my friends, feeling a bit distant because my mind is elsewhere. Emotions are tumbling, happy one second and scared the next.
And I play the Game. We can twist people around if we put our minds to it. If she suddenly shows a lack of interrest I can send her a very carefully written message that gives her no power over me but leaves her thinking and very often coming back. If she calls too early I have the "upper hand" and can get her into bed very easy. If other guys show an interrest that is usually easy to fix. The Game abuses basic human emotions and instincts, and you can play them like a violin.
Why do we do it? To protect ourself from hurt. To not go all-in. To have an easy exit. To not scare people away. Simply to have a fair chance with a person you are falling in love with.
I hate the Game, but not enough to not play it.
 
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lol. How many relationships have you been in? It's probably your star sign btw  , and there are loads of girls who love the sort of ridiculously obssessive over-clammy types who hate playing the game too :D
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Norway10161 Posts
On March 21 2008 11:58 HamerD wrote:lol. How many relationships have you been in? It's probably your star sign btw , and there are loads of girls who love the sort of ridiculously obssessive over-clammy types who hate playing the game too :D
Well .. about 5 serious relationships? I don't mind doing the game a little if I'm out clubbing and want a one-nighter, but I mind when I'm suffering from sweaty hands and actually care how it goes
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ahh haha yes. Single minded and over thinking everything probably :D? I know what it's like .
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The Game always seemed such a cynical view of relationships and life to me, and yet I know it's effective, sometimes disturbingly so. I know exactly what you mean. :/
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United States7488 Posts
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far.
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i hate the game but i tried it and it really works. that's what i'm so disgusted about. i feel like i have this slimey fucking rank mask over me trying to be sly pulling stupid "im fuckin cool" jokes and acting like a douche but it really works.
i too hate it but not enough to not do it when it counts.
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It's just one-itis. You'll get over it.
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On March 21 2008 12:28 semioldguy wrote:
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far.
Eventually, you'll have to. If you don't, you'll probably get LJBF'ed.
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I thought this was gonna be about The Game like the rapper, but then I saw TKWL and I thought, "maybe this is about his girlfriend thing again."
Glad to hear you're doing better in any case.
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On March 21 2008 12:49 pyrogenetix wrote:
i hate the game but i tried it and it really works. that's what i'm so disgusted about. i feel like i have this slimey fucking rank mask over me trying to be sly pulling stupid "im fuckin cool" jokes and acting like a douche but it really works.
i too hate it but not enough to not do it when it counts.
i'm more fascinated by it than disgusted about it. When i see something i put into plan with the expected reaction...i'm just in awe of how the game works. call it manipulation, i call it fun.
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United States7488 Posts
On March 21 2008 13:17 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:Show nested quote +On March 21 2008 12:28 semioldguy wrote:
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far. Eventually, you'll have to. If you don't, you'll probably get LJBF'ed.
Eh, It's been fine in the past. I've never been LJBF'ed either. If it doesn't go along how I think it should be at anytime I usually JLIG. I think a lot of it depends on the girl or type of girl you go after.
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On March 21 2008 14:06 semioldguy wrote:Show nested quote +On March 21 2008 13:17 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:On March 21 2008 12:28 semioldguy wrote:
I am currently not playing the Game with the girl I am interested in, though I am also not smothering her with an abundance of love. It's going well so far. Eventually, you'll have to. If you don't, you'll probably get LJBF'ed. Eh, It's been fine in the past. I've never been LJBF'ed either. I think a lot of it depends on the girl or type of girl you go after.
That's very true. I actually know a couple of girls who are fairly nonreactive to guys "gaming" them, and prefer the AFC type guy.
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I'm so far past the game right now... and loving it.
Yeah there's the fear of getting hurt but I have to let my guard down and hope, trust... It truly does depend on the type of girl though.
Edit: very nice writeup by the way
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United States7488 Posts
I don't consider myself an AFC though. I'm plenty confident and never had a lot of trouble.
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On March 21 2008 14:24 semioldguy wrote:
I don't consider myself an AFC though. I'm plenty confident and never had a lot of trouble.
I didn't mean you were. I meant I know girls who prefer AFCs.
On March 21 2008 14:24 conCentrate9 wrote:
I'm so far past the game right now... and loving it.
Yeah there's the fear of getting hurt but I have to let my guard down and hope, trust... It truly does depend on the type of girl though.
Edit: very nice writeup by the way
There is no "past the game". It's just a different part of the game. Look at Style, he's totally let his guard down, and he has a beautiful woman at his side, in a totally committed LTR. It's just a different type of game. The game isn't about playing mind games, only the very early stages are about playing games. After that, it's about actually getting to know people. You can't have a relationship with someone if all you do is play games with them, eventually you must get to know them on a more intimate level. The thing is, you can't just dump that all out on someone right away. That's the difference in good LTR game, and bad LTR game.
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