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A Life Lesson

Blogs > ilovezil
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ilovezil
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States4143 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 03:34:32
December 05 2007 03:26 GMT
#1
Yup, I learned a thing or two about life today. I'll try, to the best of my abilities, to recount the event that happened this evening. I must say...before today, I never knew how much it hurt to be stepped on by others.

I work at a hair shop, a store that sells weaves, wigs, hair pieces, and beauty supplies in general. Needless to say, it'is not the most glorious life to live, having to deal with thieves, attitude, and customers who hate your gut (~90% black and the rest hispanics and whites). It was almost a normal day today until about 6:30~7:00 pm when a coworker of mine spotted two hispanic girls walking out with two hair pieces worth approximately ~$60. Now, this isn't really anything new. There were plenty of occasions where our store got robbed, ranging from $5 to $500.

The difference today was I was fed up. I and a couple co-workers went out to retrieve the hair extensions they stole. They were outside in the parking lot, right at their car when I found my father already trying to talk them into getting the hair back. Naturally, the girls were vehemently denying our accusations, saying that they'd never steal, we're wrong, they're innocent, bla bla bla...so they're about to get in their car to leave, when I go "fuck it" and make it clear that I'm taking a picture of their license plate with my camera phone.

One of the girls become outraged at this gesture and run up to me, slugging me in the face. Probably because of the adrenaline, I didn't feel much but I retained enough composure to restrain myself from hitting back. I immediately flip my phone and call the cops, planning on jailing this bitch.

Meanwhile, my father saw what happened and became pissed. Now, I was too preoccupied with the heat of the moment to notice, but apparently, my father kicked the back of their car, which in turn pissed off the girls, two random black girls nearby, and some white guy which led to a fight between these folk and my mom/dad/coworkers . All I know is, my side of the fight intentionally let themselves get hit so we could sue these fuckers later. How wrong I was...

By the time the cops came around, it became a big riot and there were random people (including the white guy and two black girls that came outta nowhere) testifying how WE ASSAULTED THE GIRLS. Yes, we were bruised and cut while NO ONE ELSE had a scratch on them, but the cop (a white guy) told us how wrong we were to go outside in the first place. Apparently, we're supposed to let them steal and hope that the cops can handle the situation instead of defending our right to protect our products. Meh, who knows? Maybe the cop's right. I have very little knowledge about how the law works in the United States, so for all I know, I could have been wrong for letting that one girl hit me in the first place.

That's basically what happened this evening. Nothing good came out of fighting for our merchandise. I'd always wondered why big corporations like Wal Mart and Coles were so passive when it came to theives. In my situation, it would have been WORSE if we hit back anyone who had assaulted us. We're just lucky we got off without the hispanics pressing charges for my dad denting their car...

You REALLY get treated like shit around here if you can't speak English. I knew this, but I hadn't fully realized it until today. I'm sure it would've turned out different if any of us held a high position such as lawyer or big corporation president. Unfortunately, we're just a bunch of 1st and 2nd generation Koreans just trying to make a living. I feel so trapped, so unable to do anything right now. God, sometimes life can kick you HARD.

micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24780 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 03:30:50
December 05 2007 03:30 GMT
#2
There are several people here on tl with exceptional knowledge of law (let an admin point them out to be sure) who can tell you whether you are in as bad of a position as you think you are or not. Of course, consulting someone professionally makes more sense but I don't know what your parents are planning right now.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
ilovezil
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States4143 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 03:33:42
December 05 2007 03:32 GMT
#3
On December 05 2007 12:30 micronesia wrote:
There are several people here on tl with exceptional knowledge of law (let an admin point them out to be sure) who can tell you whether you are in as bad of a position as you think you are or not. Of course, consulting someone professionally makes more sense but I don't know what your parents are planning right now.


Well, perhaps. I'd really love it if there was a solution within this situation, but I doubt it considering we work around a small community. This means everyone's got each other's backs and we asians get the short end of the stick.

Like the random witnesses btw. There were people we never saw before testifying against us. We do have camera recordings, but they're way too vague for anyone to use as proof.
HonkHonkBeep
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
China353 Posts
December 05 2007 03:37 GMT
#4
That's how it works in the USA, and that's why many stores have a policy that if you see someone shoplifting not to attempt to physically stop them.
God is cruel; sometimes he makes us live.
fanatacist
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
10319 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 03:41:01
December 05 2007 03:40 GMT
#5
If the girls belong a minority, you're done.

Your dad fucked it up by kicking the car though. Otherwise you'd have

1. Less shit on your hands.
2. A better case against the girls.
3. Fewer injuries.
Peace~
OverTheUnder
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
United States2929 Posts
December 05 2007 03:43 GMT
#6
yea, i'm no expert on the law, but your dad really fucked up by kicking the carT_T hope it all turns out alright;/
Honor would be taking it up the ass and curing all diseases, damn how stupid can people get. -baal http://puertoricanbw.ytmnd.com/
ilovezil
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States4143 Posts
December 05 2007 03:44 GMT
#7
We were done in the first place. Even if we had done NOTHING wrong, we're seriously up against an entire community. Cops? They really don't do shit. It's a well known fact, but I hadn't realized that as fully as I had today.

I'm just gonna use this as a lesson learned, and handle everything inside the store. Oh and physical resorts may be an option for the customer, but NEVER for the store owner/workers. The only way you'd win is by having hard evidence that the identifiable assaulter clearly caused damage.
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24780 Posts
December 05 2007 03:49 GMT
#8
Aren't retailers allowed to detain shoplifters as long as they haven't left the property yet? I lived with a guy who had been tackled by store security for suspicion of shoplifting (oh he'd stolen stuff, but nothing had been proven since there was not clear video footage linking him from snatching the stuff all the way to leaving the store, hence he got off).
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
nA.Inky
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States794 Posts
December 05 2007 03:49 GMT
#9
That really sucks, man. Sorry to hear this happened to you guys. Try not to let it make you cold though. There are a lot of good people, even if sometimes the real assholes are much more salient.
Email (use instead of PM): InkMeister at aol dot com AIM: InkMeister
ilovezil
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States4143 Posts
December 05 2007 03:52 GMT
#10
On December 05 2007 12:49 micronesia wrote:
Aren't retailers allowed to detain shoplifters as long as they haven't left the property yet? I lived with a guy who had been tackled by store security for suspicion of shoplifting (oh he'd stolen stuff, but nothing had been proven since there was not clear video footage linking him from snatching the stuff all the way to leaving the store, hence he got off).


Actually, the only option you'd have is following the customer. You cannot physically block the way to a customer's exit (that's trapping against someone's will). You can follow and try stalling somehow until the cops arrive. That's all the options though, really. As for your case with the guy who got tackled, it's easy really if you're not dealing with an entire community who's of a different skin color. Hundreds of witnesses is hard to argue against even if they're all bullshitting.
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24780 Posts
December 05 2007 03:55 GMT
#11
On December 05 2007 12:52 ilovezil wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 05 2007 12:49 micronesia wrote:
Aren't retailers allowed to detain shoplifters as long as they haven't left the property yet? I lived with a guy who had been tackled by store security for suspicion of shoplifting (oh he'd stolen stuff, but nothing had been proven since there was not clear video footage linking him from snatching the stuff all the way to leaving the store, hence he got off).


Actually, the only option you'd have is following the customer. You cannot physically block the way to a customer's exit (that's trapping against someone's will). You can follow and try stalling somehow until the cops arrive. That's all the options though, really. As for your case with the guy who got tackled, it's easy really if you're not dealing with an entire community who's of a different skin color. Hundreds of witnesses is hard to argue against even if they're all bullshitting.
Realistically that might be what applies to your case. However, I'm sure there is a clear legal stance on this (maybe it varies significantly from area to area). I am pretty sure people stealing can be detained at least under certain circumstances. LAW STUDENTS, where are you??
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
dronebabo
Profile Blog Joined December 2003
10866 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 04:05:48
December 05 2007 04:02 GMT
#12
--- Nuked ---
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24780 Posts
December 05 2007 04:11 GMT
#13
On December 05 2007 13:02 dronebabo wrote:
honestly running a small business makes me want to kill someone
In my experience just about every alternative sucks equally/more (yes I've done retail and forms of public service where the average person doesn't feel motivated to act nicely towards you). Small business -> you have to put up with that shit you described. That usually cuts down on bureaucracy though which can drive you to madness (correct me if I'm wrong). What's worse is when (such as in my case) you are legally responsible for the well being of the people that are pissing you off at work (I haven't had any violent dreams yet though). In the OP it was clear the family needed to be careful for EVEN MORE problematic reasons. Damn life sucks.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
decafchicken
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States20167 Posts
December 05 2007 04:29 GMT
#14
On December 05 2007 12:26 ilovezil wrote:
You REALLY get treated like shit around here if you can't speak English. I knew this, but I hadn't fully realized it until today. I'm sure it would've turned out different if any of us held a high position such as lawyer or big corporation president. Unfortunately, we're just a bunch of 1st and 2nd generation Koreans just trying to make a living. I feel so trapped, so unable to do anything right now. God, sometimes life can kick you HARD.


Your obvious inability to grasp the English language has lead to your demise.
Oh wait you just wrote a ~500 word essay on how your life sucks with ~2 grammatical errors.
how reasonable is it to eat off wood instead of your tummy?
ilovezil
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States4143 Posts
December 05 2007 04:33 GMT
#15
Heh, i'm sorry if I came off blaming my race. I honestly wasn't aiming for that. That comment pertained to how little the cops tried to help us, when just this morning, the store next door (owned by a white guy) got robbed and some cop went as far as asking for OUR video footage to catch the guy that broke in. I do know race is a factor, but I honestly try not to blame it when I can help it. Much of this is due to the fact that we're poorly educated, I suppose.
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24780 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 04:43:43
December 05 2007 04:42 GMT
#16
On December 05 2007 13:33 ilovezil wrote:
Heh, i'm sorry if I came off blaming my race. I honestly wasn't aiming for that. That comment pertained to how little the cops tried to help us, when just this morning, the store next door (owned by a white guy) got robbed and some cop went as far as asking for OUR video footage to catch the guy that broke in. I do know race is a factor, but I honestly try not to blame it when I can help it. Much of this is due to the fact that we're poorly educated, I suppose.
Well to be fair, did they kick the guy's car in front of a crowd of angry and biased people? I know what you mean though, as much as we pretend that our society is pretty fair, it isn't.

Edit: and I'm sure the reason why the crowd showed up was partly due to this issue as well (well, probably).
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32157 Posts
December 05 2007 04:50 GMT
#17
People are shitbags. Personally, I'd take out my survailance cameras and hide a bat behind the counter for the next cunt that tried pulling that, but then again, this is probably why I don't work in retail.

Actually, if you have cameras, you could prolly stick it to them. And I wouldn't worry about shit happening to you.
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
zer0das
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States8519 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-05 05:40:07
December 05 2007 05:39 GMT
#18
On December 05 2007 13:29 decafchicken wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 05 2007 12:26 ilovezil wrote:
You REALLY get treated like shit around here if you can't speak English. I knew this, but I hadn't fully realized it until today. I'm sure it would've turned out different if any of us held a high position such as lawyer or big corporation president. Unfortunately, we're just a bunch of 1st and 2nd generation Koreans just trying to make a living. I feel so trapped, so unable to do anything right now. God, sometimes life can kick you HARD.


Your obvious inability to grasp the English language has lead to your demise.
Oh wait you just wrote a ~500 word essay on how your life sucks with ~2 grammatical errors.


Eh... you have no idea how long it took him to compose it, and even if he reads/writes English fine it is no guarantee he can speak it well. My experience with this is first generation Asian immigrants are difficult to understand (my mom is the only 1st generation Asian immigrant I've known who speaks perfect English) due to their inability to say certain words very well. Second generation generally speak the language fine though, although I imagine it also depends on whether there's an ethnic community where speaking the mother tongue is possible.

Anywho, sucks man. Good luck I suppose.
Clutch3
Profile Joined April 2003
United States1344 Posts
December 05 2007 07:14 GMT
#19

I'm surprised that so many posters here are blaming your dad first and foremost. Once the girl physically assaulted you, your dad kicking her car becomes a footnote on the whole situation. Honestly, what do you expect a parent to do if their kid was assaulted without provocation? I find no fault in your dad's action.

While cops vary a lot in how reasonable they can be (i.e., it's possible you're gonna get screwed through no fault of your own), you have no reason to be ashamed here. A lot cops have a natural reaction to just immediately be jerks to everyone at a scene such as this as a kind of first line of defense. Some cops are just jerks. Some might just be having a crappy day.

If you need any advice, there's probably TL'ers who can provide some more constructive comments if you keep us updated on any further drama.

Anyway, I'd honestly document any visible injuries you have, just in case you need them down the road. And keep your head up; there will always be people in the world like this.
L0veandPeace
Profile Joined November 2007
30 Posts
December 05 2007 07:33 GMT
#20
damn shit like this pisses me off. think of it on the bright side. they are losers and they are probably gonna get STDs and pregnant when they are 18. they are probably at home drunk making fun of you and your dad right now, and then going to have mad sex afterwards.
Snet *
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States3573 Posts
December 05 2007 14:56 GMT
#21
On December 05 2007 16:33 L0veandPeace wrote:
damn shit like this pisses me off. think of it on the bright side. they are losers and they are probably gonna get STDs and pregnant when they are 18. they are probably at home drunk making fun of you and your dad right now, and then going to have mad sex afterwards.


that's probably already old news for them

lol @ your dad kicking the car
961254
Profile Joined November 2007
Canada47 Posts
December 05 2007 16:15 GMT
#22
this is really bullshit man, i feel terrible for you and your family. but you know, sometime that's how life is, unfair and immoral.
Fen
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
Australia1848 Posts
December 05 2007 16:36 GMT
#23
There was a thread a little while back about whether or not youd hit a girl under special circumstances. I voted for yes. That girl came running up to you and punched you only because she was assuming that you were not going to hit her back. If it had of been me, I would have broken her nose. But then again thats not going to help you out with the cops at all.

I hope everything works out for you.
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