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Girl dilema - Page 2

Blogs > RtS)Night[Mare
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Night[Mare
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
Mexico4793 Posts
December 04 2007 05:37 GMT
#21
Well, maybe i should be straight forward(maybe not that straight-forward haha) and ask her whats going... i wont lose anything. And at least she'll tell me im just a friend / she likes me too, and make a decision from her awnser? I think at least that way i'll know what land im stepping in.

if im just a friend what the heck, keep things smooth and fun. Otherwise i could ask her whats up with the situation. I mean, if she's tired of her bf, it isnt my fault is it? its not like she's staying forever with him. on the other hand if she still likes her bf but at the same time likes me, i could play accordingly and not make any serious move, but at the same time, fining another girl just to let her know im not waiting forever. What do you think, fair enough?

Teamliquidian townie
nA.Inky
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States794 Posts
December 04 2007 06:12 GMT
#22
I agree, RtS)Night[Mare. Good plan all around.

Yep, I think being direct is the way to go. My personal experience is that women TEND to be surprised and relieved by my directness. They don't expect it, and you just kind of cut right to the point, in a friendly, compassionate way. There is no shame in liking someone - it's actually a really cool thing. Just don't come off like you NEED her and that your entire life is about her (I think that is a trap some guys can get into.) I think it's easy to get bogged down in mind games, when just simply saying what you think is the best way. However, flirtation and that stuff - indirect as it may be - is very good. Keep that going. Keep things pleasurable, whether it's joking around, or having a deep talk.

Don't let all this player stuff that people talk about here fool you. Just be confident in yourself, love yourself, and be direct and honest with other people. If she tells you no, just calmly accept it like it's no big deal. I don't understand some of the people here talking about how bad it is to "just be a friend." That's ridiculous! We can all use more good friends, and something else, if you have a nice social network, it WILL help your romance life.

Sounds like you are on the right track. And yep, millions of other girls out there if this one don't work out. The real trick in romance is remembering that even though you want *this particular girl*, there are many other wonderful women out there that could please you just as much. So keep positive.


Email (use instead of PM): InkMeister at aol dot com AIM: InkMeister
haduken
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Australia8267 Posts
December 04 2007 08:49 GMT
#23
No offense dude. Unless his bf is some hardcore gangsta then you should not puss out just cuz he's bigger and can kick your ass.
i say just go ahead and pop it. in my experience, females usually knows that you like her way before you realise it. either way, she's got an answer for you so what's to lose?
Rillanon.au
Dyllyn
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Singapore670 Posts
December 04 2007 09:33 GMT
#24
On December 04 2007 17:49 haduken wrote:
No offense dude. Unless his bf is some hardcore gangsta then you should not puss out just cuz he's bigger and can kick your ass.
i say just go ahead and pop it. in my experience, females usually knows that you like her way before you realise it. either way, she's got an answer for you so what's to lose?


Leaving another man's woman alone is not "puss"ing out, as you put it, it is more like having manner. you'd be pretty pissed if some guy was making a move on your girl right?

Girls in a relationship are not "fair game" and you really shouldn't think of it that way.

But i do agree with the second part, nightmare you have nothing to lose by finding out what she thinks of you.

Besides, you americans jump from partner to partner so quickly... she just might dump the guy
scv rush ftw
lugggy
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
450 Posts
December 04 2007 14:20 GMT
#25
Scrubs always lose because they are imposing rules on themself that they wish other ppl would follow. Ask yourself this, would you pass up on true love because the girl was already taken in some relationship she doesnt really want to keep?

As for directness, that only works on girls with male brains. You are shooting yourself in the foot betting on such a rare bird.
A little effort please, this isnt a forum for just posting every link on the internet.
nA.Inky
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States794 Posts
December 04 2007 15:28 GMT
#26
Lugggy, I have no problem at all getting women, and I tend towards directness (although, like I say, I also flirt and keep things enjoyable to the extent that I can.) It seems possible to me that you read too much of that PUA stuff online.

Me? I just keep a positive attitude and treat everyone with respect, and at the end of the day, I have no problem attracting women. It's true that some women will not like my approach, or like something about me, but that's true of anyone - that's just how romance is. There are millions of women who would like me and be attracted to me, so I just focus on finding those.

No need for a cynical approach to women (I notice so many of the PUA people have such nasty attitudes towards women.) All you gotta do is be a positive, confident person, and someone is going to like you.
Email (use instead of PM): InkMeister at aol dot com AIM: InkMeister
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32054 Posts
December 04 2007 15:35 GMT
#27
Never ever ever EVER date a girl who will cheat on her current bf to get with you. There is no exceptions to this rule.
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
lugggy
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
450 Posts
Last Edited: 2007-12-04 15:41:30
December 04 2007 15:38 GMT
#28
I'm sure you believe it's your directness that does the trick but another guy trying to follow this advice is not going to be doing the same things that are probably working for you. And we're not talking about "able to get women", we're talking about not blowing it with this one particular girl in question. You can be direct after she's more pot committed that's all i'm saying. Otherwise you don't need to "blow your load" of directness prematurely.

I'm not saying to be dishonest or to slow play, I'm saying to not get too wordy too fast because that guy's words might not be best for that girl's words and you want to maximize the incentive for her to work through that, before you make the issue possible, if at all possible. He isn't necessarily going to word things the same as you Inky and he might have something different to be direct about than you, so I think my advice will work in more cases. Now if you mean directness in some other sense then fine, but other people in this thread have been saying to just "talk it out" which is bullshit advice for a first attempt at starting a particular relationship. You save that for last ditch or after it's started.
A little effort please, this isnt a forum for just posting every link on the internet.
Chill
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
Calgary25980 Posts
December 04 2007 15:38 GMT
#29
On December 05 2007 00:35 Hawk wrote:
Never ever ever EVER date a girl who will cheat on her current bf to get with you. There is no exceptions to this rule.
Moderator
nA.Inky
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States794 Posts
December 04 2007 17:33 GMT
#30
Luggy: maybe we agree... I do believe that it's weird to just go up to a woman and say "let's have a relationship - what do you think?"

I am more about having a fun conversation... picking on her a bit, joking around, getting the laughs going, or else an engaging talk. Then I tend to just hit them with my directness "I wan't to kiss you." Or "I want to hold your hand." Or you can just hug them or kiss them (even more direct), but I've been told by girls that they appreciated how I was direct and how I asked them first.
Email (use instead of PM): InkMeister at aol dot com AIM: InkMeister
nA.Inky
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States794 Posts
December 04 2007 17:34 GMT
#31
Also, the deal is, unless you are way inexperienced (which is ok - we all start that way) you can tell when attraction is happening. When the attraction is going, you can be direct about it.
Email (use instead of PM): InkMeister at aol dot com AIM: InkMeister
Night[Mare
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
Mexico4793 Posts
December 04 2007 19:11 GMT
#32
there's a party this friday. Maybe if she doesnt bring her boyfriend / goes to the party, i can talk about it. Hoping for good results. I might get some info from her friends at least. They all like me
Teamliquidian townie
lugggy
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
450 Posts
December 05 2007 01:56 GMT
#33
Okay inky to me that is fine, those are moves, they will go for that. That's an okay use for words at any stage, whatever feels like it may work. But I would still say to not force it, to leave it for "last", i.e. if it can happen some other way it's much more likely to get past some defenses.
A little effort please, this isnt a forum for just posting every link on the internet.
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