I should probably be studying, but education is for chumps. With the Communications degree I'm getting, I'll probably be more respected as a poster, anyway.
CHAPTER 3: QUOTING
Quoting is a huge part of the forums. Statistics show that over 5 posts are quoted each day. It might look simple, but it is in fact on par with prying pieces of food from between your teeth and not thinking about a gay little boy whenever someone says "Harry Potter".
Let us dissect this phenomenon in the name of Internet Science.
+ Show Spoiler [Part 1] +
Part 1: Quoted For Truth (QFT)
QFT is for when you're reading a thread and you see a post that basically sums up everything you wanted to say. It's cool, because it makes you feel that special kind of kinship you normally only feel when you're staring at a girl's ass, look up and make eye contact with some dude who was doing the exact same thing. It runs deep.
Also, it saves you the hassle of having to type something yourself (energy conservation is very important for a Career Poster).
You can simply quote the post and type QFT, or even nothing at all!
Still, there are a few caveats.
+ Show Spoiler [The Wrong Approach] +
See, it doesn't look as bad here thanks to the Hidden Quotes function, but it would be a huge mess in a regular thread.
Rule of thumb: if you can't read all of the post out loud in just ONE breath, don't quote it in its entirety. Replace the contents by "hell yeah" or "big ass wall of text" or whatever, but do not force other people to scroll through all of that stuff again.
+ Show Spoiler [The Right Approach] +
No clutter, no effort, opinion 100% conveyed. A minimalist Posting piece of art.
QFT is for when you're reading a thread and you see a post that basically sums up everything you wanted to say. It's cool, because it makes you feel that special kind of kinship you normally only feel when you're staring at a girl's ass, look up and make eye contact with some dude who was doing the exact same thing. It runs deep.
Also, it saves you the hassle of having to type something yourself (energy conservation is very important for a Career Poster).
You can simply quote the post and type QFT, or even nothing at all!
Still, there are a few caveats.
+ Show Spoiler [The Wrong Approach] +
On June 04 2007 21:00 a shameful poster wrote: QFT!!
See, it doesn't look as bad here thanks to the Hidden Quotes function, but it would be a huge mess in a regular thread.
Rule of thumb: if you can't read all of the post out loud in just ONE breath, don't quote it in its entirety. Replace the contents by "hell yeah" or "big ass wall of text" or whatever, but do not force other people to scroll through all of that stuff again.
+ Show Spoiler [The Right Approach] +
On June 04 2007 21:00 a teenage mutant ninja turtle wrote:
No clutter, no effort, opinion 100% conveyed. A minimalist Posting piece of art.
+ Show Spoiler [Part 2] +
Part 2: Advanced Quoting
This is what separates the boys from the slightly more effeminate boys: being able to do some serious Advanced Quoting. This is mostly important in discussion threads, where you'll often want to address several posts and several separate points in those posts at the same time. Fail in this endeavour and nobody will even read your posts. Just like a star, you will quietly burn out and turn really really fat right before you die.
+ Show Spoiler [The Wrong Approach] +
As you can see, this is worthless. It's impossible to see what exactly this worried dog is trying to refute, there's nothing but confusion all around and oh god I think my ear is starting to bleed.
+ Show Spoiler [The Right Approach] +
A neat, organized post where everything is addressed seperately and any ambiguity is dissolved, like when you treat a snail to a salt bath. Just try and tell me that's not a work of art.
This is what separates the boys from the slightly more effeminate boys: being able to do some serious Advanced Quoting. This is mostly important in discussion threads, where you'll often want to address several posts and several separate points in those posts at the same time. Fail in this endeavour and nobody will even read your posts. Just like a star, you will quietly burn out and turn really really fat right before you die.
+ Show Spoiler [The Wrong Approach] +
On June 04 2007 21:00 a worried dog wrote:no ur so wrong,,
As you can see, this is worthless. It's impossible to see what exactly this worried dog is trying to refute, there's nothing but confusion all around and oh god I think my ear is starting to bleed.
+ Show Spoiler [The Right Approach] +
On June 04 2007 21:00 a bunch of soccer moms wrote: no.. i know several babies who are not fat at all
no they are God's little meatballs
NO TEARS FOR QUEERS
while hamburgers are a pretty good food i think cakes is the best food
no they are God's little meatballs
NO TEARS FOR QUEERS
while hamburgers are a pretty good food i think cakes is the best food
A neat, organized post where everything is addressed seperately and any ambiguity is dissolved, like when you treat a snail to a salt bath. Just try and tell me that's not a work of art.
So, there we have it. Another valuable lesson you can add to your posting repertoire. I still see a lot of mistakes being made against my first two chapters, but I'm sure it'll start seeping in eventually.
~~*One can only dream*~~