EPThttps://soundcloud.com/evanthebouncy/mamut
the song of mamut (mammoth) with extinction in mind. hope you like!
--evan
a simple piano piece
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evanthebouncy!
United States12796 Posts
https://soundcloud.com/evanthebouncy/mamut the song of mamut (mammoth) with extinction in mind. hope you like! --evan | ||
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FFGenerations
7088 Posts
3 suggestions ... at 28s try adding a pause here before the main phrase starts at 1m try reworking the higher note part slightly to have some faster notes in it, which could make it more impactful at 1.30-1.45 either repeat using a phrase with higher notes or just cut off there (with the intention that the piece loops immediately from the start, as a game music). having it trail off is tired/predictable | ||
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evanthebouncy!
United States12796 Posts
thanks. these kind of opinionated feedbacks work much better than the generic ones. thanks again When I wrote the song I had extinction in mind that's why I wanted the fade out | ||
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FFGenerations
7088 Posts
lol | ||
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Archeon
3261 Posts
Although comparing anything to unexpect is always unfair, at least as far as I'm concerned. Still might give you some ideas. I think your piece is a little too repetitive (I know it's supposed to be, it mimics a slow walk), a second variation after the first one with the high piano or removing the first repetition at the end would make it more interesting. Also I'd play around with speed changes, like starting the piece faster and slow it down more and more (don't remember the italian term). Similar idea to your fade-out. | ||
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evanthebouncy!
United States12796 Posts
On May 18 2016 22:50 Blackfeather wrote: Kinda funny how you approach the thematic similarily to unexpect's piece: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZrbhiPYJAs Although comparing anything to unexpect is always unfair, at least as far as I'm concerned. Still might give you some ideas. I think your piece is a little too repetitive (I know it's supposed to be, it mimics a slow walk), a second variation after the first one with the high piano or removing the first repetition at the end would make it more interesting. Also I'd play around with speed changes, like starting the piece faster and slow it down more and more (don't remember the italian term). Similar idea to your fade-out. listen to the drum part around 1:30 it's bolero!! | ||
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Archeon
3261 Posts
 Unexpect often have small sub-melodies with classical influences esp. on fables, but with how many small sub-melodies every song has it's not surprising to see the one or other familiar one. In the mind of the last whale was somewhat similar in it's theme to your song (and in the way they make the piano stand for life), so I'd thought I'd link it. | ||
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