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United Kingdom1704 Posts
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/qVWBUfj.jpg)
On Creative Unblock
I don't really believe in creative block now; not in the way I used to. I used to think that when a piece of music spontaneously formed in my imagination, that was true creativity. Never mind that this was usually only thirty seconds or so at most. The rest of the time my creative best was largely unavailable, blocked, out of reach. Not only is this incredibly problematic in the professional world, but it simply isn't true. Bit by bit I have broken down this idea until there's practically nothing left of it.
Why now?
My current scoring project has brought this to the front of my mind. From the beginning both my instinct and my methodical conclusions pointed in one direction, and the directors' wishes seemed to point in another. For the first two weeks' demos I was brave and completely instinctive, until the feedback session came round: some of it is right, some of it is not. Now this is not a problem, or an issue of any kind. It's expected, normal and productive. In reaction I polarised my musical approach.
After another week of work, and two completely new potential demos, this polarised approach had failed completely. I didn't need to get the director's feedback on it to know that. Everything created was confusing, unmoving or both, and hadn't worked. Though I had been positive and hard working throughout, when I finished work at midnight the day before the next feedback session, and my music was worthy only to be thrown out, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. I was feeling self-indulgent, low, and “uncreative”. Don't worry though- that last part is really bullshit.
The next day though, I pulled myself together enough to keep in mind what needs doing, and to act as a professional. I hadn't admitted it to myself the night before but as I went to bed having binned the music that I had been working on all week (and feeling very justified in feeling all miserable about it), the next musical ideas were already finding space to filter through, and form in my head. So as usual I got up early and sat down to write. It only took an hour and I had a new sketch. In six more hours, that sketch became a couple of minutes of the right music; a completed cue representing a hybrid of my approach with the elements the director was looking for.
What had happened?
Well, in retrospect it really isn't hard to figure out, nor is it even a problem. As I know well, getting to the desired result is iterative. I've been refining my process for a few years now and will be doing so for a long time. But while scoring I have to learn my lessons over and over: follow the approach which is created and designed from an instinct, because it's almost always the right one; reassess constantly and don't be precious about anything which isn't working; not everything needs to start as genius, and; don't stop just because something hasn't turned out well. Though reassessing is crucial, I judged the music as if it were an end product. Is it right yet? No? Then it's not an end product. When I polarised my approach I was too far from what I had designed and knew would work, but that in itself allowed me to then imagine a middle-ground. Again as plenty of times before, I had to recognise the lessons, and sit back down the next day to move the process forward.
Had I not done this and failed to continue, indulging in ideas of being an unworthy professional, I would have said, rather miserably, that I was creatively “blocked”. It would have appeared to be the case to myself and to anyone else. What an excuse that would be not to do the work at hand. How easy and un-objective.
Creative unblock
That's what this whole process and the steps along the way really are. The iterative process of making, and mining down to the final work. It can look like nothing until the last day, and by stopping just the day before you would seem vindicated in your perception of yourself as blocked and unable to create. There's the bullshit. I honestly don't see this process as being blocked, then unblocked, and I really don't think I wrote that music in an hour- it really did take me three weeks! The previous three for all their mixed output were truly creative and completely informed the result.
![[image loading]](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CbVExThWIAA1IaP.jpg)
My accurate, real-life graphic of the first stage of a project
Creativity as I once imagined it
Have you ever spoken to an amateur musician who never finishes any songs, or an amateur painter who never finishes any paintings? That's what it is to be trapped in the idea of the creative spark as the entire basis for anything worth making and unable to move past it. I used to be plagued (StarCraft pun intended) by this idea and I'm not the only one. The real business of creating is not easy, and though we all want to believe that we create great works through divine inspiration and talent, the idea is totally counter-productive and often kills the seed by not allowing it to develop.
By trying to judge at every stage as if something were a finished work you can't make the necessary mistakes and you lose the ability to expand and distill that spark into what you really intend. You have only failed as a creator if you stop before you're content with your effort, perfect or not.
Right now I'm working on a short film called The Finest Red. The director and producer want it to go to Cannes amongst other places and if I have my way, it will. Hopefully I can show you some of the music sooner rather than later. You can learn more about the film here.
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/motekeatinge
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MoteKeatinge
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOF4f_FVJzmiiYz29nGjUg
Website: www.motekeatinge.co.uk
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I always love reading what you write on composing: this in particular, as its such a harsh subject.
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thanks for the read, I have creative block right now and have had it for a long time.. As a solely guitar-based musician, I have had terrible luck being "inspired" enough to write music, least past the first few ideas.. I havent completed a song in years, but now that you mention composing for film, I do remember back when I went to university for music, we had a "Film composing" class where we had to write an hours worth of music ontop of a TV edit. I randomly just filled in the space inbetween the voiceovers, and due to deadlines and etc, I ended up with a finished hour of TV music. Now of course, it wasnt great or anything but the important part that I remember was it was completed.. now I can't even write 5 minutes of music without completing it? Odd.
I should just try that again, free-writing over a random youtube video and who knows, if any part of it is relatively cool, could turn it into a song.
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Netherlands5198 Posts
My first (piano) composition took me 3 months to complete. I had, like you described, this idea and it was already 'perfect'... Ultimately I feel that was the main reason why it took me so long to complete it, another was that I didn't have a deadline. Now looking back at the piece I think it's just mediocre at best and no longer feel proud of it anymore. I think my piano teacher was quite amazed (probably actually displeased) that I was spending so much time, that I could be practicing, on completing the piece. She, my teacher, told me a professional composer would never take this long, that they would only need a few days or a week at most.
With my second composition I had an assignment/theme, I just knew what it needed to sounded like, but I didn't have this perfect idea, I didn't have any notes I would cling on like in my first composition. I also had a deadline. It took me about 2-3 hours to complete and another 2 hours of refining it the day after. I think those 2 factors were key in completing it so fast. Funny enough I'm much prouder of this piece than my first.
I really like your story. I gave me a lot of food for thought and some sort of confirmation of thoughts I had regarding this subject. As for what my teacher said, I don't agree with that. With productivity in mind I agree with your conclusion. But as an amateur musician myself, that has some perfect idea's that turned into unfinished work... I'm not ready to discard those idea's. Just because something is unfinished doesn't mean I cannot ever still finish it. I like to believe that I can (and will) one day make one of those idea's a whole and thus create perfection.
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United Kingdom1704 Posts
On March 08 2016 07:28 SnowfaLL wrote:
thanks for the read, I have creative block right now and have had it for a long time.. As a solely guitar-based musician, I have had terrible luck being "inspired" enough to write music, least past the first few ideas.. I havent completed a song in years, but now that you mention composing for film, I do remember back when I went to university for music, we had a "Film composing" class where we had to write an hours worth of music ontop of a TV edit. I randomly just filled in the space inbetween the voiceovers, and due to deadlines and etc, I ended up with a finished hour of TV music. Now of course, it wasnt great or anything but the important part that I remember was it was completed.. now I can't even write 5 minutes of music without completing it? Odd.
I should just try that again, free-writing over a random youtube video and who knows, if any part of it is relatively cool, could turn it into a song.
Not completing a song for years must be incredibly frustrating. What about just consciously writing a really simple piece? Take any pressure off that it could be a masterwork, don't give a damn about that and just commit to writing something simple, which you like enough to make 3 minutes out of it. Do you write music often?
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United Kingdom1704 Posts
On March 08 2016 08:41 Peeano wrote:
My first (piano) composition took me 3 months to complete. I had, like you described, this idea and it was already 'perfect'... Ultimately I feel that was the main reason why it took me so long to complete it, another was that I didn't have a deadline. Now looking back at the piece I think it's just mediocre at best and no longer feel proud of it anymore. I think my piano teacher was quite amazed (probably actually displeased) that I was spending so much time, that I could be practicing, on completing the piece. She, my teacher, told me a professional composer would never take this long, that they would only need a few days or a week at most.
With my second composition I had an assignment/theme, I just knew what it needed to sounded like, but I didn't have this perfect idea, I didn't have any notes I would cling on like in my first composition. I also had a deadline. It took me about 2-3 hours to complete and another 2 hours of refining it the day after. I think those 2 factors were key in completing it so fast. Funny enough I'm much prouder of this piece than my first.
I really like your story. I gave me a lot of food for thought and some sort of confirmation of thoughts I had regarding this subject. As for what my teacher said, I don't agree with that. With productivity in mind I agree with your conclusion. But as an amateur musician myself, that has some perfect idea's that turned into unfinished work... I'm not ready to discard those idea's. Just because something is unfinished doesn't mean I cannot ever still finish it. I like to believe that I can (and will) one day make one of those idea's a whole and thus create perfection.
She told you that a professional composer would be much faster? What kind of a motivation is that..? Yeah a professional composer would be much faster (thought it's not like there's one universal standard of "professional speed"), but you can almost be guaranteed that they weren't always fast. It's practice, loads of practice. I would say it's also genius, but when it comes to speed I'm honestly becoming unsure of the line between genius, and fearless willingness from some composers to just write whatever occurs to them.
I really get that you have those ideas. But think of your own example- at the time that piano composition idea seemed amazing, but now it's just.. meh, a piece of music which isn't even that great. I think when you agonise so much, the vision of the piece as a whole gets totally lost and the music really suffers. Also, the risk is that those ideas are now built up in your head as potential masterpieces waiting to happen. That's a lot of pressure for composing, I don't know how you'd put a single note to paper with that thought in mind. I know I can't.
To add to that, I would say an idea is rarely as perfect or amazing as it seems it might be... This is purely my opinion but I really think the genius is usually in the realisation of the idea. What kind of journey the music goes on, how it relates to the listener, even just if it's loud or soft, are all more important than the basic idea. Sometimes it really is both, but I don't think slaving over something at excruciatingly slow pace is the way to bring out the best.
You definitely don't have to throw those ideas out though, I totally agree with you there. But I don't know... I think by saving these ideas to become these perfect works, you're storing up a whole lot of creative trouble and disappointment. I would honestly say that if you came up with those, you'll come up with more.
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EPT
