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Brazil1429 Posts
Losing hurts, much more than anyone can imagine.
And the pain begins while still inside the game, right after the "gg".
While we're leaving the PCs, it seems that life refuses to go on.
Despite the movement around us, there's something like a instant blockade on memory and perception. I can't see or remember anything but memories of the game we just lost. Right now, I feel like a rag.
I wash my face to, hopefully, remove the installed unpleasantness, but the cold water doesn't produce meaningful transformations.
Slowly, silences becomes supreme.
I remember past events of extreme happiness and joy, but the contrast worsens even more my humor.
I reflect about the incongruences that the everyday offer us with uncomfortable frequency. Insane and obsessed evaluations. In one day we're Olympian Gods and Eros is always on our side. But on the next day we've become evil and disposable.
It's a strange invasion that provoke, hurts and kill us every second.
As I go home, I try to forget the recent facts. It's impossible.
That gank we tried could've been executed differently. It would leave us in a great position in the game. But I sigh: It's impossible to change what's already done.
I return to reality. I'm in my home, finally in home.
My home is supposed to protect me. I look for company and find nothing. Solitude is probably the only company I have right now. I crash on the sofa and drink something that will enwrap and return be the bliss of ignorance. The liquid goes down my throat painfully, with no other effect.
That draft. If we had adjusted our draft differently, we would have more chances. Maybe we could've avoided the loss. And I would not be like this.
Sweet dreams.
I try to find a music to calm me down, but all it does is to make me even more sad.
That play on the early game was perfect, but the enemy escaped with almost no life. He should have died there, and we would've gained a massive advantage that would secure us the mid game.
I'm devastated. Even with all the effort, committing myself until the ultimate consequences, I feel like a void. It's as if someone had stolen me my consciousness. I can't articulate even one logical reasoning. A cerebral void has installed itself in an absolute way.
I try to read a book but I can't reach it's ideas. Nothing can reach me.
I decide to try sleeping. Slowly I move to the bed. I lay down. I close my eyes, but the images don't move away even for a single second. They corrode me from inside. I see, as if it was happening right now, that fateful team fight that happened when the game was still undecided. Our reading is clear, our initiation is precise and we manage to get a solid in. But, at that very moment, a deafening sound of the telephone ringing wakes me up.
I try to recover the team fight that stayed on the broken dreams, but it never existed. Only in my crazy desire to modify what happened.
I try to sleep once again. It's impossible.
This will be one infinite night of defeat. Until the next victory.
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Worthy of five stars, sir.
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5* This was well written, really describes the mental and emotional feelings when you work so hard for something. GG
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Aww I didn't get a million dollars for playing the game I love. Aww my life is so hard. Aww Aww Aww.
User was warned for this post
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Thank you for writing this. Beautiful. Reading this... thinking about LaNm... literally in tears.
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one man's pain is the next man's pleasure.
tears of defeat translate to tears of victory. press onward, or fall & bleed with the rest.
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RoTk giving the last hope.
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Performance wise, ti4 was largely underwhelming for DK. But considering the history, contribution of the players in the scene and the talents they have, they're the one deserve to win the most. It's really unfortunate for LaNm (maybe Burning and possibly MMY) as this is their last tournament
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On July 21 2014 08:55 shostakovich wrote:
This will be one infinite night of defeat. Until the next victory.
But for Lanm, there will be no next victory 
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Did a player from TI4 write this? It reads more like a Google translated fan-fiction.
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Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
It's so arrogant to be ungrateful on 4th place. It's not enough, DK is "entitled" for the #1, they "deserve" it. If they didn't expect to get to the main event, this would have been a great success. No, instead they have to slit their wrists for losing, after reading this shit and donating their money to Save The Children foundation.
Losing is beautiful, if we substract the money and emotions, all that's left is strategy and losing reveals us the flaws in our strategy. You can learn a book from a loss, but only a paragraph from a win. That is, if you don't want to kill yourself after reading what OP had to say about losing.
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On July 21 2014 10:45 Hexo_ wrote:
Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
It's so arrogant to be ungrateful on 4th place. It's not enough, DK is "entitled" for the #1, they "deserve" it. If they didn't expect to get to the main event, this would have been a great success. No, instead they have to slit their wrists for losing, after reading this shit and donating their money to Save The Children foundation.
Losing is beautiful, if we substract the money and emotions, all that's left is strategy and losing reveals us the flaws in our strategy. You can learn a book from a loss, but only a paragraph from a win. That is, if you don't want to kill yourself after reading what OP had to say about losing.
u clearly were never good at anything ever
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Brazil1429 Posts
Just to make it clear for everyone, this post is about losing, not DK losing. It could be any picture there.
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On July 21 2014 10:51 teddyoojo wrote:Show nested quote +On July 21 2014 10:45 Hexo_ wrote:
Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
It's so arrogant to be ungrateful on 4th place. It's not enough, DK is "entitled" for the #1, they "deserve" it. If they didn't expect to get to the main event, this would have been a great success. No, instead they have to slit their wrists for losing, after reading this shit and donating their money to Save The Children foundation.
Losing is beautiful, if we substract the money and emotions, all that's left is strategy and losing reveals us the flaws in our strategy. You can learn a book from a loss, but only a paragraph from a win. That is, if you don't want to kill yourself after reading what OP had to say about losing. u clearly were never good at anything ever
So Mr. Psychoanalyst, by your logic I'd have to be really fucked up every time I lose or I'm not good enough? Maybe I was good, maybe, just maybe I had an injury that made all my hours worth shit. I'd say that's a pretty fucking big loss, beaten by life itself. Did I end up writing poetry? Nope, I educated myself about sports psychology long before my time to forcefully retire came. I had an issue dealing with playing bad, not necessarily losing. I acted upon it and I fixed it. Simple.
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Brazil1429 Posts
On July 21 2014 11:26 Hexo_ wrote:Show nested quote +On July 21 2014 10:51 teddyoojo wrote:On July 21 2014 10:45 Hexo_ wrote:
Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
It's so arrogant to be ungrateful on 4th place. It's not enough, DK is "entitled" for the #1, they "deserve" it. If they didn't expect to get to the main event, this would have been a great success. No, instead they have to slit their wrists for losing, after reading this shit and donating their money to Save The Children foundation.
Losing is beautiful, if we substract the money and emotions, all that's left is strategy and losing reveals us the flaws in our strategy. You can learn a book from a loss, but only a paragraph from a win. That is, if you don't want to kill yourself after reading what OP had to say about losing. u clearly were never good at anything ever So Mr. Psychoanalyst, by your logic I'd have to be really fucked up every time I lose or I'm not good enough? Maybe I was good, maybe, just maybe I had an injury that made all my hours worth shit. I'd say that's a pretty fucking big loss, beaten by life itself. Did I end up writing poetry? Nope, I educated myself about sports psychology long before my time to forcefully retire came. I had an issue dealing with playing bad, not necessarily losing. I acted upon it and I fixed it. Simple.
No one is telling you how to feel after losing, dude.
Losing is indeed beautiful, but it doesn't mean it's not painful.
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rOtK inherits the will of Burning 
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On July 21 2014 10:45 Hexo_ wrote:
Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
It's so arrogant to be ungrateful on 4th place. It's not enough, DK is "entitled" for the #1, they "deserve" it. If they didn't expect to get to the main event, this would have been a great success. No, instead they have to slit their wrists for losing, after reading this shit and donating their money to Save The Children foundation.
Losing is beautiful, if we substract the money and emotions, all that's left is strategy and losing reveals us the flaws in our strategy. You can learn a book from a loss, but only a paragraph from a win. That is, if you don't want to kill yourself after reading what OP had to say about losing.
I don't think "ungrateful" is the right word here. This iteration of DK was created to pursue to dream of getting first at TI, and they had to skill to do so. They knew that, knew that they could take the Aegis, but in the end, they fell short.
They're disappointed.
It's what they've worked so hard for over the past year, and for two of the players (maybe more, MMY might also consider leaving), this TI would be the last DotA tournament they'd play in their lives. Yes, losing exposes flaws. It can teach us. But it doesn't mean that it can't hurt, that it can't wound you so deeply that it'll always haunt you.
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Beautifully written.
Dunno why there's such hostility in some of the comments. The OP is clearly about, well, "losing," as it says in the title. It doesn't even apply to just DK, or just TI4, or even just DotA 2. Aside from the references to ganks and such, it could easily just be about losing in general. Missed opportunities that have a huge impact on how everything plays out, either in life or in a competition. Could've, would've, should've. You remember it, you learn from it, and you move on.
Thanks for this.
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Yeah to the guys who write that DK have no right about being sad since they still got a lot of money. It's not about the money. Of course the money gives the tournament its glory, but for the players this is their world cup. This is the grand finals, the place where everyone is and the place to prove yourself and make your name immortal.
Why do you think that after a loss in the World Cup (football) playoffs you see players cry? They make millions a year and winning the World Cup won't give them that much extra. It's about being able to say you're the best. If you're the goalie in the German team right now you were a part of something. Your team was the best that year. No matter how you got to the finals. No matter if the only goal in the finals was an own goal. You're the best.
I don't think that the winning team this year will be happier then Na`Vi, iG or Alliance were after their wins. They will be just as happy, but not happier. Winning is more then making a living, winning is about knowing you're better then the other team, or in the case of TI: knowing you're the best in the world!
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On July 21 2014 10:45 Hexo_ wrote:
Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
Trash posting like this is going to take you far.
It's very difficult to be instantly rational and positive about a loss of this scale during the emotional aftermath. Losses hurt, especially when it's your livelihood and an opportunity that might never come again.
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The hate coming from some people in response to the thread is astonishing.
People say how can you care or "it's only a game" ... people don't seem to understand passion.
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On July 21 2014 21:14 BongChambers wrote:
The hate coming from some people in response to the thread is astonishing.
People say how can you care or "it's only a game" ... people don't seem to understand passion.
Because they never played "THE GAME" where you put your time, your hopes and everything you have. And 99% of the times it's not enough and you still come up short.
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Losing is tough, people take it different ways. Heck even in casual pub games losing sucks and the usual response is "Report so and so." Coming from WC 3 and SC 2 I lost a lot of games, but I used that to get better. My mentality is that when I lose I use that as fire to play better. This may not work for everyone, but I feel like respecting why you lost, and then rebuilding to be better is how you become a champion. Granted I am not playing in a $11 Million tournament, but I love competition, and did some small semi-proish tournaments and things.
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Well written. <3 It's okay, man.
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What a read man.
What a game.
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makes me want to cry :/
seems relevant to my own life atm too :\
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And then, next time you lose, if you can remember anything but the loss? You remember the previous losses.
> Life is hard.
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On July 21 2014 10:10 Gako wrote:
Aww I didn't get a million dollars for playing the game I love. Aww my life is so hard. Aww Aww Aww.
User was warned for this post
But but but Mushi played so well! He deserved to win!
+ Show Spoiler +
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Fantastic read.
`
almost made me cry
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if this had been written by someone else other than a TL writer, i'm quite positive it would not receive such attention and approval.
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Brazil1429 Posts
On July 23 2014 00:17 babishh wrote:
if this had been written by someone else other than a TL writer, i'm quite positive it would not receive such attention and approval.
Why?
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East Gorteau22261 Posts
On July 23 2014 00:17 babishh wrote:
if this had been written by someone else other than a TL writer, i'm quite positive it would not receive such attention and approval.
Why do you think that? There is nothing to draw attention to it that's unique to the writer's staff status
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I don't get why people think the price money is so huge. The teams have always a staff with 10-20 people and I'm pretty sure that the players can't keep everything from the price money. But even if you don't consider that, you still have to pay taxes on winnings if I'm not wrong. 4th place means $819,802 and let's assume every player gets $100,000. A good annual salary is about $120000. Sure they have more winnings in the end of the year but they also work way harder and yes they WORK. So yes it can also hurt financially.
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Doesn't valve only pay the prize money directly to the players? I'm pretty sure that's the deal with TI.
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On July 21 2014 10:45 Hexo_ wrote:
Easily the gayest shit I've read this year.
It's so arrogant to be ungrateful on 4th place. It's not enough, DK is "entitled" for the #1, they "deserve" it. If they didn't expect to get to the main event, this would have been a great success. No, instead they have to slit their wrists for losing, after reading this shit and donating their money to Save The Children foundation.
Losing is beautiful, if we substract the money and emotions, all that's left is strategy and losing reveals us the flaws in our strategy. You can learn a book from a loss, but only a paragraph from a win. That is, if you don't want to kill yourself after reading what OP had to say about losing.
A true competitor is never satisfied with anything but first. I guarantee you Arrow Gaming felt the same way when they realized they were knocked out as DK did when they got fourth.
A competitive scene has no room to be content with anything but the best.
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While I agree that this is gayest "shit" I've read this year aswell, this is an amazing depiction of a life defining event.
This post made me remember so many similar moments from my life that led me at worst punching a hole in a wall after being unable to sleep for two nights. It haunts you. It makes you overanalyze an event so many times you start wondering how you actually managed to fail since there are hundreds of ways to change the outcome.
Each person treats a failure differently, for me personally, it gives focus after driving me crazy for a couple of days. It makes the goal I try to achieve much clearer and I know there are plenty of ways to get there.
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Russian Federation194 Posts
I don't get some of the criticism for this, DK's past 10 months were for TI4. Every pub they played was to improve their mechanics to be better than the rest, the 10 hour days on a pc, Mushi leaving his home country and teammates was so he could win TI. They traveled to almost every international event they could except ESL one. This year with DK winning on New Year's with the 4-3 comeback looked like their year to win. Obviously 4th isn't something to view as a failure, but I think DK can look at this event and know looking at the past year, this was their TI.
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EPT![[image loading]](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BtBeDynCEAAHwUo.jpg:large)
