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I'll try and keep this short but, here goes.
>known girl for 4-5 years
>been close friends with her for 2 of those years
>she's at least a 7/10, looks a lot like LiviBee for a comparison most of you will understand
>never had feelings for her
>had other girlfriends since meeting her
>she's never had a boyfriend, or even expressed interest in another boy (she had issues as a kid that I won't go into detail about)
>she gets asked out a lot, never bothered me because i knew she'd say no.
>she finally expressed interest in another guy
>he is showing interest in her too
>ohfuck my heart
>haven't felt this weird pain since I found out my (early) highschool crush~5 years ago had slept with another guy
>realize I'm into my friend, and that I probably won't handle it too well if she starts dating this guy
If it makes any difference, we're both 19 year old uni students. So I know that any relation-ship dramas at this age aren't a big deal.
what do I do TL?
Poll: What DoTell her I'm into her (29) 60% Do nothing and hope for the best (13) 27% Other: please comment (6) 13% 48 total votes Your vote: What Do (Vote): Tell her I'm into her
(Vote): Do nothing and hope for the best
(Vote): Other: please comment
  
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GGNORE you lost just like innovation lost to Maru. HAD 4 games to adjust and never did.
The only way I see this playing out is to do nothing. You had 4 years to do something and didn't, and now that your relationship is changing you got scared. It doesn't help that you've had other girlfriends. If things don't work out then go for it. But if you confess know you will probably lose a friend or make it really weird between you two, and you will get shot down if she does like the other person.
PS: Confessions usually don't work.
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On July 31 2013 01:44 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
GGNORE you lost just like innovation lost to Maru. HAD 4 games to adjust and never did.
The only way I see this playing out is to do nothing. You had 4 years to do something and didn't, and now that your relationship is changing you got scared. It doesn't help that you've had other girlfriends. If things don't work out then go for it. But if you confess know you will probably lose a friend or make it really weird between you two, and you will get shot down if she does like the other person.
PS: Confessions usually don't work.
I probably could have worded that better, by confess I mean, properly ask her out on a date, not beta out and tell her I'm into her and then wait around for her to say something.
thanks for the advice though, taken it into consideration. really the only thing holding me back from just asking her out is the possibility of losing a friend
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spoilers, my friend... spoilers...
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You tell her right now you like her as more than a friend AND she actually feels strongly about this guy, you will lose her as a friend or anything more.
Even though the "right" thing to do is tell her you have feelings for her, it doesn't give you the highest of chances of being with her.
My advice is patience, you don't want to tell her you like her as more than a friend when she's in love with another guy nor do you want to tell her this when she is satisfied physically and emotionally. (by another guy) I would recommend using subtle breakup techniques or just waiting it out if you think their relationship has a use by date.
After its over, see what you have to work with then make your move. You aren't screwed exactly but the things you can do presently with any form of positive outcome are limited.
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life is not an anime t-t
put yourself in her position
4 years of your best friend and you, just being friends, you've never dated and you finally found someone, do want them to suddenly put you in a position to choose? that's hard on anyone, esp for her if she didn't date people in that time.
just stand by her. if it's meant to be it's meant to be. sometimes you realize it's too late and that's okay too.
your stomach will hurt for a while. you won't want to see her, you'll cringe at her name, whatever. be as honest as you can - "i'm gonna be really busy in the next month or so, i need some time to rethink a few things" or something. make sure you're still there for her as a friend, contact her periodically and ask for how she and the dude are doing. bear through
and one day you'll wake up and either be over it or she'll be single and you can go from there
glhf
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Pandemona
Charlie Sheens House51493 Posts
Get some balls, man up and just say. I didn't realize it until now but i really like you and i would like to date you myself etcetc.
Now she might freak out at this but there is nothing more you can do if you really do like her you will have to accept her descion of what she makes
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Proposition her in this way: Use the whole " If we're both not married by 30, lets make babies" angle so she knows you're interested then bang her. Problem(s) solved.
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confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way
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On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way
Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day?
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DO NOT confess. It will not work, and you will make it awkward. Find another girl. You also might get another opportunity if you wait.
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On July 31 2013 03:22 9-BiT wrote:Show nested quote +On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day?
no hahah. there are just a shitload of girl blogs on here, and seeing as i dont play sc2 anymore, i don't have much interest in that section of the website or those blogs!
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Ask her out. As stated above, DO NOT CONFESS. It never works. Flirt, get touchy, show romantic and sexual interest in her. If you get rejected, try to make yourself as busy as possible and limit contact - this will help you get over it.
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On July 31 2013 03:34 QuanticHawk wrote:Show nested quote +On July 31 2013 03:22 9-BiT wrote:On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day? no hahah. there are just a shitload of girl blogs on here, and seeing as i dont play sc2 anymore, i don't have much interest in that section of the website or those blogs!
I would love to see you condescendingly comment on all the sc2 blogs. It would be so entertaining, like: "That's a pathetic build man, you ought to get out of bronze league." or something.
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ahhhhh thankyou everyone for the replies. Goddamit I really shouldn't post anything 3 hours after I usually go to bed, oh well.
I think I'm just going to do nothing for the next few weeks and see what happens. If he asks her out or she asks him out, I'll do nothing and continue being her friend. If nothing happens between them I'll make a move (not confess, ask her out properly).
also that "someone is playing with the toy you neglected" remark, Hawk, I can see why you would think that, and maybe it's right to some degree, but if you knew the whole story, which you had no way of knowing, you'd probably see why I chose not to ask her out before now. but that's neither here nor there.
thanks again for the input guys, appreciated.
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On July 31 2013 03:22 9-BiT wrote:Show nested quote +On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day?
He's incredibly cynical too. Always the "you have no chance" "give up" "dump her asap"
Almost makes me feel like he doesn't want to see people happy in a relationship for some reason. lol
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United States18840 Posts
On July 31 2013 04:41 GhostOwl wrote:Show nested quote +On July 31 2013 03:22 9-BiT wrote:On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day? He's incredibly cynical too. Always the "you have no chance" "give up" "dump her asap" Almost makes me feel like he doesn't want to see people happy in a relationship for some reason. lol
Actually, I'm inclined to think that his intentions are the exact opposite. Relationship advice just tends to be fairly divisive.
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On July 31 2013 04:31 Ikidomari wrote:
also that "someone is playing with the toy you neglected" remark, Hawk, I can see why you would think that, and maybe it's right to some degree, but if you knew the whole story, which you had no way of knowing, you'd probably see why I chose not to ask her out before now. but that's neither here nor there.
thanks again for the input guys, appreciated.
Neglected wasn't the best choice of words. More like you didn't realize what you had until her availability as a dating prospect was in jepordy. Basically, it will come across as jealousy, not actually liking her, which you do... That isn't a comment on your motivations (as stated, I don't know and it is irrelevent) but how she'll likely interpret that. Like even if she did feel similarly about you, that isn't the best starting point for a relationship and as you stated, it is best to problem let her do her own thing, learn from it and don't squander your next opportunity
On July 31 2013 04:27 jrkirby wrote:Show nested quote +On July 31 2013 03:34 QuanticHawk wrote:On July 31 2013 03:22 9-BiT wrote:On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day? no hahah. there are just a shitload of girl blogs on here, and seeing as i dont play sc2 anymore, i don't have much interest in that section of the website or those blogs! I would love to see you condescendingly comment on all the sc2 blogs. It would be so entertaining, like: "That's a pathetic build man, you ought to get out of bronze league." or something.
hahahaha I am blunt, not condescending!
On July 31 2013 04:41 GhostOwl wrote:Show nested quote +On July 31 2013 03:22 9-BiT wrote:On July 31 2013 02:56 QuanticHawk wrote:
confessions are retarded
if you are gonna do something, it has to be a non verbal action, but the fact that you're doing it now only because someone else is playing with the toy you had neglected, so to speak, is something that is immediately gonna be picked up and probably not in a good way Lmao do you just create a search query for "girl blogs" and respond to them all day? He's incredibly cynical too. Always the "you have no chance" "give up" "dump her asap" Almost makes me feel like he doesn't want to see people happy in a relationship for some reason. lol
quite the opposite. happy is not the adjective i'd use to describe posting about your relationship issues in a blog rather than talking it out with your spouse, bitching about 'friendzone', lamenting over a lack of success, etc etc
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QuanticHawk's probably out to sabotage dudes by giving them bad advice. Definite "if I can't have it, nor should you" vibe...
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EPT![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/uWmLq7k.jpg)
