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A Loser's Perspective (College Admissions)

Blogs > Loser777
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Loser777
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
1931 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-03-25 01:54:52
March 25 2011 01:54 GMT
#1
I figured I'd make this blog as a companion thread. While I am certainly fortunate for my experiences in the admissions process--I've had my share of rejections.

I dedicate this blog to anyone who wishes to vent or discuss feelings associated with the process. I'll be checking this regularly, so if anyone wishes to discuss their experiences, feel free to share whatever.

      By writing this blog I have already defined myself as one of the rejected. It’s an inherent definition, as after all, why would I bother commenting on the admissions process if I were accepted? It’s the same with the letter that begins by commenting on how tough the admissions process was and how many applicants there were—by that point everyone knows what’s following that sentence.
      After watching the process happen from the sidelines for three years, it’s expectedly strange to experience things firsthand. It’s strange how quickly mentalities can change over the process. I was at first nearly hopeless, then ridiculously hopeful, and now I’m back to some kind of middle ground of denial. That isn’t to say I’ve had it the worst—and I’m very thankful for what I have right now.
I would say the most difficult part of the process is not the actual decision—but where relationships between friends are tested. Before people get their decisions, it’s natural to joke around with people who are getting in “for-sure” and to comfort those who are less certain about their chances.
      But come decision time, it seems that those who are accepted can’t do anything but blast the news on the top of their facebook feeds or call their parents, while us others are left in the dust. Those who are separated by acceptance and a rejection don’t seem to be the same. It is the rejects who seem to form a new bond—connected by a powerful force.
      Nothing has changed in the lives of those who are accepted—yet everything changes for those who aren’t. It’s an unprocessable and cliché set of emotions: surprise, anger, jealousy, and despair.
      Most testing are the instances where someone supposedly unqualified is accepted and someone who is presumable overqualified isn’t. I try to avoid the most pressing of impulses—to blame the admissions process, to blame the fates, and to blame the other person that took the spot that I had thought was so rightfully mine. It’s impossible to ignore these feelings completely, yet from the eyes of those accepted, it’s also nearly impossible to imagine them.
      Losers are not expected to garner any sympathy and while I don’t expect any, I hope that people can be sane and respectful regardless of what their decision was. At this point—I go back to the words of Day[9]: “It is what it is.”




****
6581
Cambium
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
United States16368 Posts
March 25 2011 02:03 GMT
#2
I came in expecting a rant, but I was pleasantly surprised at how well your conveyed your feelings, almost profound.

I had a similar experience with my grad school applications, and I can especially relate with this line in your blog:

I was at first nearly hopeless, then ridiculously hopeful, and now I’m back to some kind of middle ground of denial.
When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
TyranoS_NiveK
Profile Joined April 2010
United States177 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-03-25 02:13:17
March 25 2011 02:12 GMT
#3
Since you're tag says you're from China, I'm not entirely sure of how the admission process works there.

As a freshman in college right now, I can definitely relate to your experience. I was deferred by my top choice, then waitlisted by my first and second choice only to be ultimately rejected. It was painful, and in the back of mind I was plagued with doubts. Like you, I was envious of the success of some of my best friends.

But what really changed it was orientation week of college. Trust me, as long as you keep a somewhat open mind as you head towards college, you'll be VERY presently surprised. In just a matter of days, I decided to put my past behind me, make a new identity for myself. In high school I was your typical math/science introvert, but in college, I really saw this as an opportunity to show a new side of me.

The college that I'm at now was definitely nice, but wasn't my dream school. No matter where you are, as long as you keep an open mind, you'll have many opportunities and experiences you never imagined. Now if you asked me whether I was happy here, I would have to say "I F*cking love it." From the people I've met, to (some) of the classes I take, there's just so much to see and do.

Without straying too far, I just want to emphasize that time heals all wounds. Nothing me (or most likely anyone else) says will be able to remove the sting of rejection, but it will come to pass. The key is just to have something to look forward and keep going. Whether it's SC, a sport, or something nerdy/academic, as long as you have interests, you'll find that the pain eventually fades away. It took weeks for the news to sink in, and for over a month I was still bitter when IMing some of my friends.

But it'll all pass. Trust me. As long as you keep an open mind, good times are literally right around the corner. College is an amazing experience, and it has far less to do with where you end up but rather what you make out of it.

Edit: typo.
The best has yet to come.
Nfi
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States357 Posts
March 25 2011 02:16 GMT
#4
My biggest fear is that I won't even make it to any U.C. at this point with little to no extra curricular and I am looking at a 3.8 if not less weighted my senior year .
"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person, give man a mask, and he will tell you the truth."
QQplay
Profile Joined February 2009
United States229 Posts
March 25 2011 02:26 GMT
#5
On March 25 2011 10:54 Loser777 wrote:
I was at first nearly hopeless, then ridiculously hopeful, and now I’m back to some kind of middle ground of denial. That isn’t to say I’ve had it the worst—and I’m very thankful for what I have right now.



accurately describes my feelings! would've died of joy if i saw the big envelope from USC today but reality hit me again when i received the standard sized letter. ;-; best part is that UPenn is my last college i'm waiting from and i was deferred from ED so things are pretty gloomy. oh well, cheers to the Day9 quote!
emperorchampion
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Canada9496 Posts
March 25 2011 02:31 GMT
#6
No matter where you go, post-secondary is fucking awesome!
TRUEESPORTS || your days as a respected member of team liquid are over
Loser777
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
1931 Posts
March 25 2011 02:33 GMT
#7
On March 25 2011 11:12 TyranoS_NiveK wrote:
Since you're tag says you're from China, I'm not entirely sure of how the admission process works there.

As a freshman in college right now, I can definitely relate to your experience. I was deferred by my top choice, then waitlisted by my first and second choice only to be ultimately rejected. It was painful, and in the back of mind I was plagued with doubts. Like you, I was envious of the success of some of my best friends.

But what really changed it was orientation week of college. Trust me, as long as you keep a somewhat open mind as you head towards college, you'll be VERY presently surprised. In just a matter of days, I decided to put my past behind me, make a new identity for myself. In high school I was your typical math/science introvert, but in college, I really saw this as an opportunity to show a new side of me.

The college that I'm at now was definitely nice, but wasn't my dream school. No matter where you are, as long as you keep an open mind, you'll have many opportunities and experiences you never imagined. Now if you asked me whether I was happy here, I would have to say "I F*cking love it." From the people I've met, to (some) of the classes I take, there's just so much to see and do.

Without straying too far, I just want to emphasize that time heals all wounds. Nothing me (or most likely anyone else) says will be able to remove the sting of rejection, but it will come to pass. The key is just to have something to look forward and keep going. Whether it's SC, a sport, or something nerdy/academic, as long as you have interests, you'll find that the pain eventually fades away. It took weeks for the news to sink in, and for over a month I was still bitter when IMing some of my friends.

But it'll all pass. Trust me. As long as you keep an open mind, good times are literally right around the corner. College is an amazing experience, and it has far less to do with where you end up but rather what you make out of it.

Edit: typo.


I should probably change my location haha... I applied to US schools as a citizen. I'm just going to enjoy these last few days before the last of the decisions roll out--and I do believe time heals all wounds.

On March 25 2011 11:16 Nfi wrote:
My biggest fear is that I won't even make it to any U.C. at this point with little to no extra curricular and I am looking at a 3.8 if not less weighted my senior year .


If anything, my friends and I are an example of how fickle the UCs are. You'd be surprised at who gets in and it's better to have tried and not gotten in than to have been rejected with regrets as to how well you could have done.



6581
getSome[703]
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States753 Posts
March 25 2011 02:34 GMT
#8
I was 2/6 for college admissions, but I can't really relate to what you're feeling. I guess some kids feel that way and some are OK with it.
Running Log! http://www.runningahead.com/logs/5081b4d7a4a94c5e8fa20b01e668dfb6/calendar
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24745 Posts
March 25 2011 02:35 GMT
#9
This is one thing I sorta missed out on in life lol...

I didn't apply anywhere after HS that I couldn't get into since I knew I wasn't able to afford full tuition anywhere anyway. I didn't apply to grad school... just went to an open house, had a chat with an adviser, and filled in some paperwork XD

One part of 'growing up' I guess I missed out on... but probably that is fortunate.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
QQplay
Profile Joined February 2009
United States229 Posts
March 25 2011 02:41 GMT
#10
On March 25 2011 11:33 Loser777 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 25 2011 11:16 Nfi wrote:
My biggest fear is that I won't even make it to any U.C. at this point with little to no extra curricular and I am looking at a 3.8 if not less weighted my senior year .


If anything, my friends and I are an example of how fickle the UCs are. You'd be surprised at who gets in and it's better to have tried and not gotten in than to have been rejected with regrets as to how well you could have done.


Yeah, you could probably get into the mid tier UCs, considering your UC GPA is probably lower than 3.8. ELC appears to be helping people a lot for UCLA. I know a few people who got into some schools that shocked me but I won't compare and get upset. If anything, there's always Merced and Riverside.
Offhand
Profile Joined June 2010
United States1869 Posts
March 25 2011 02:51 GMT
#11
I found that what I got accepted to, and what I got waitlisted for were entirely arbitrary compared to where certain schools fell on "reach" vs "safety" scale. There were only a few people I found that got far too excited about a certain school only to not get into it.
Sc1pio
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States823 Posts
March 25 2011 02:54 GMT
#12
I ended up 3/8, which didn't feel great, but still ended up a great school (Lehigh) on a partial scholarship and am having a great time. Don't worry, it will soon pass, and you should be able to have a great time no matter where you end up.
"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, in the expert's there are few. " -Shunro Suzuki | fortuna fortes adiuvat
Froadac
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States6733 Posts
March 25 2011 03:04 GMT
#13
Meh. I'm still super apprehensive
Impervious
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Canada4212 Posts
March 25 2011 03:06 GMT
#14
On March 25 2011 11:03 Cambium wrote:
I came in expecting a rant, but I was pleasantly surprised at how well your conveyed your feelings, almost profound.

Agreed.

Unfortunately, I can't really relate..... I went 7/8, and the one rejection was the one I didn't really want to go to.

Not to sound like a dick, but your situation has gotta suck..... However, it does not matter what school you go to, you'll get a good education. You'll get lots of networking opportunities, meet a lot of people, and, generally, have an awesome time.

If you want to.

The key part is you need to want to make the most of it. Otherwise, you'll have a shitty time at any uni, regardless of which uni you go to.
~ \(ˌ)im-ˈpər-vē-əs\ : not capable of being damaged or harmed.
TehPwntif
Profile Joined April 2010
United States25 Posts
March 25 2011 03:32 GMT
#15
This is really insightful, and I understand your feelings. Just remember you'll be happy wherever you go and whatever you do in life.
Glaven
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada554 Posts
March 25 2011 03:36 GMT
#16
I know exactly where you're at right now. All my grad school applications are in the gray zone, some more hopeful then others but I don't know what to do. My graduation date for undergrad is set but I've moved it. Gah. It's the worst feeling not knowing your fate. I obviously didn't make early admission and that's enough for me to have me chronically stressed.
Special Tactics
Froadac
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States6733 Posts
March 25 2011 03:48 GMT
#17
I am writing a blog on this ><
vindKtiv
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States215 Posts
March 25 2011 05:02 GMT
#18
I went through the college application process and it was honestly not as hard at all, but then again, I only applied to 3 colleges (got into 3 for the curious). The pressure some parents can put on the process can be absolutely ridiculous, especially Chinese parents (which I assume some of you have). They act as if going to college is somehow going to dictate the rest of your life. It's not, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. With that being said, it shouldn't be a matter of the accepted/rejected at all. It should be where you are going if you are going to college because honestly, there are plenty of colleges that you can go to if you missed your target school.
kainzero
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States5211 Posts
March 25 2011 05:17 GMT
#19
what's funny is that after you attend the one you actually got accepted to, you just forget everything and plunge straight into it and that it really doesn't matter in the end anyway.
Loser777
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
1931 Posts
March 25 2011 05:39 GMT
#20
I think I need to reexamine my self-esteem -_-, Loser777. I don't think I'm all too disappointed in myself--I need to stop worrying about how I did relative to my friends. As easy as it sounds to ignore what everyone thinks, I'm having a really tough time doing it.
6581
Zlasher
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States9129 Posts
March 25 2011 05:48 GMT
#21
I went 4/12

A home state U (in california)
A out of state U (in arizona)
another out of state U (indiana)
A private university (DC)

Needless to say I picked the one in DC and many times have regretted the decision and had wished I had gone back home to california (went to boarding school in new jersey for high school).

That said, there are a lot of things going on in my life that I wouldn't have had if it weren't for the fact I went to school here in DC. Pros and Cons, everything will have it, but your life will play out no matter what and the results are just something that will come.

You can look back and reminisce but in the end acceptance (no pun intended) is all you can do, and live your life with no regrets and to the best you can.
Follow me: www.twitter.com/zlasher
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