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I got a seatbelt ticket back in Ventura for the greenforest lan, it's something ridiculous like 150$ which I could easily get dropped in court if I went, but it's too far and too much hassle and the shitty cop knew this when he pulled us over and we were doing nothing wrong. Paying it after extensions and borrowings tomorrow hopefully.
Yesterday (well actually 2 days ago now, I think) I decided to try and make dried pinto beans. Who knew how difficult that shit was. First you need to separate all the bad beans and rocks in the bag out of the pot (wtf?). Then you gotta rinse the beans off a few times and then let them soak overnight in the pot. Then rinse them off again and low cook them for like 4 more hours. I ate my meal in less than 15 minutes, they don't last that long in the fridge. Inefficient, but healthy I think.
My gf started acting strange all of the sudden (she claims otherwise ofc) and was acting super vague and avoidant for like a month. She went on a few vacations and shit, so I started to miss her and was being extra needy? nice? unusual? ( I dunno what to call it). I guess I just realized how much I took for granted and how lucky I am to have a girl like her. I tried to see her every chance I got and gave her some surprise gifts but she mostly had excuses or didn't care.
When I finally got her to see me in person I thought we talked out any petty differences well, but she kept saying 'nothings changed'/'didn't accomplish anything with this talk' type of attitude. Now she wants undefined 'space' as I finally beat it out of her that she feels somewhat depressed and confused on life and thinks we should focus on ourselves first. And she was asking me shit like if I wanted to have kids or get married in 5 years or whatever which is quite ridiculous thing for me and her to even be thinking about right now (fyi we've been together 4).
I don't understand what she's thinking exactly because about a week before this all started getting strange she was drunk dialing me, sending me sexy pics, texting how she missed me, saying how she wanted to spice up intimacy with role play or whatever. And she is still calling and texting me daily (albeit not as much as she normally used to), and she won't say she misses me or loves me either. It's kind of ironic actually, she is maybe falling out while I seemed to start falling in. I feel like I get mixed signals from her, or there is just something personal she is hiding/not telling me. I can't get her off my mind.
I got laid off in May, business booming too hard. I need to find some work (somewhat related to gf thing) and get some shit done for myself and for us but I don't have a vehicle or a license because of some bullshit. To make a long story short (if you care you can find some old blogs), I've got like 1500$ in fines to court, probably some other debts for a fender bender (unrelated), I need to get some dental work done (probably need root canal procedure) but have no health care, among some other mild health related things (I have chronic tonsiloliths and this weird eyelid dandruff thing that bugs). Kinda feels shitty, like that old adage "At least you have your health!", because I don't really.
I don't really like living here anymore because my friend/roomate is dirty and lazy and sometimes obnoxiously loud, but I'm not really one to complain about petty shit like that and make things worse. It's too far from most of my friends, gf (another somewhat related reason to us), family and my 'hometown', but I don't really have the means or a place to go, plus it's a huge hassle if I do find a place to stay to get shit moved and setup. And my friend would have to find a new roomie as well (I know it's not my problem but still).
As I said before I'm broke as shit barely paying bills to live here and eat off of unemployment and monthly debt collection from selling my car. I even tried to go to social services to get EBT and they cut it off after a month for some reason.
Still watching movies pretty regularly, mostly garbage as usual. Still haven't seen Inception and still no quality torrents out. I've had a free theatre pass for like 8 months now which shows how long its been since I've really gone out and done anything. Anyways, the last couple decent/good ones I watched were Rampage, Felon, RepoMen, and Predators was ok.
I am a member of an ambitious (underrated/unknown) sc2 team which seems to be starting to go places and get serious with esports but I feel like I shouldn't even be playing and even trouble finding myself wanting to play all that much because of current happenings.
I've been cooking and cleaning a lot more regularly lately for some reason.
I dunno, I'm trying to look for something positive or productive that I've done in the last week or two, but drawing a blank.
Well, this was mostly just supposed to be random shit that's been going on lately because I couldn't sleep, but it seems that It's mostly negative and depressing. Sorry about that. Wish I could have gotten to sleep earlier so I could have woken up at a regular time to go out and do something productive/look for a job today. It seems like it might not be a shitty rainy day today too. Better luck tomorrow I guess.
edit- Hoping to go back to homebase on halloween, looking forward to blow off some steam and possibly hang out with my gf. I don't have a costume though, anyone have any cheap ideas for me?
 
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Think about all the happy things!!! Im sure theres lots of positive things in your life too!
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Hopefully things will look up some point soon :D
As for costumes, I think the best I've heard this year is a Rubik's cube. With a bit of cardboard and some paint it should be dirt cheap. GL man!
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On October 27 2010 01:28 emperorchampion wrote:
Hopefully things will look up some point soon :D
As for costumes, I think the best I've heard this year is a Rubik's cube. With a bit of cardboard and some paint it should be dirt cheap. GL man!
Rubik's is an awesome idea, that or Carebears. Get a fuzzy one piece pyjama suit, some ears, and slap on a patch so you can be bedtime bear. Then you can make crude comments all night about going to bed.
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I'm going to be 100% honest: get your shit together.
You got laid off in May... it's nearly November. I know the job market is rough out there. I know you don't have an easy mode of transportation. but... come on. There are people out there with no education breaking their backs to put food on the table for their family. There are people out there with debilitating health issues much worse than yours that get out of bed every morning and do their best.
Yet, you watch movies "pretty regularly." Your eSports team is starting to "get serious."
Why aren't you doing some side work? Why aren't you going to job interview after job interview? Why aren't you taking some jobplace skill improvement courses that you could get for free from the employment office? Why aren't you trying to improve your situation?
Stop making so many cry baby excuses for yourself and get something done.
I'm not going to touch on your girlfriend problems, but I'll leave you with this: what kind of future can you provide for her if you don't change anything? Maybe she's starting to think about that question, too.
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hmm it kinda sounds like your gf is seeing other guys? Or is her attitude something to do with your whole unemployment thing, or a mix of both?
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You can contest the ticket by declaration, cant you?
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This girlfriend problem is kind of similar to mine. That kept me up all night for 6 nights in a row a few weeks ago, its sort of resolved but not really. Damn girls can really screw with you...
As to everything else you need to put yourself out there and get yourself a job. It will help lots.
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Yeah I miss Rick James too...
Keeps me awake every night 
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No sympathy from the Blog section - home of the TL girlblogs... You're already at the finish-line and have been there for four years.
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I'm in a similar position. Got dumped by my GF of 3 years and got demoted at my job within 24 hours. Now instead of feeling like I'm making progress in my life I'm back to square one. I might get laid off on Friday, and I'm actually hoping I do so I can get some time to get my shit together. I'm so sick of the white collar world that I'm seriously considering joining the army since it's always been a dream of mine.
Don't give up buddy.
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Good luck, man. Sounds really rough. :<
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i'm going as mario
its just a hat and a mustache from hot topic. its pure win.
1) I wont be the douche at parties not wearing a costume
2) I won't be the faggot that wears an elaborate costume and doesn't get laid
3) Cheap
4) True to my gamer self while still being mainstream enough to be socially accepted
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On October 27 2010 02:02 ProTech_MediC wrote:
I'm going to be 100% honest: get your shit together.
You got laid off in May... it's nearly November. I know the job market is rough out there. I know you don't have an easy mode of transportation. but... come on. There are people out there with no education breaking their backs to put food on the table for their family. There are people out there with debilitating health issues much worse than yours that get out of bed every morning and do their best.
Yet, you watch movies "pretty regularly." Your eSports team is starting to "get serious."
Why aren't you doing some side work? Why aren't you going to job interview after job interview? Why aren't you taking some jobplace skill improvement courses that you could get for free from the employment office? Why aren't you trying to improve your situation?
Stop making so many cry baby excuses for yourself and get something done.
I'm not going to touch on your girlfriend problems, but I'll leave you with this: what kind of future can you provide for her if you don't change anything? Maybe she's starting to think about that question, too.
im gonig to go with this guy in general, altho i wish u the best and hopefully u get ur stuff together.
I would suggest making a list of some sort of whats important to you and what you want to accomplish in the next year then work 100% to doing that. or continue to just drift w/e up 2u ^^;;
either way i hope u become happy in whatever u decide
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I'd go to see a counsellor; they can really help a lot. The only reason I say this is because not being able to sleep is usually the sign of something that is a non-standard low, that is if it actually affects you physiologically it would be probably beneficial to talk to somebody about it and nip it in the bud right away before you develop something such as depression/dysthymia.
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I don't really know how you would tackle all that..
Just be positive. Bad things happen to good people, and eventually something good should be coming towards you, if all this bad is happening.
About the job, I didn't have a job in 2009 from May-December, because I sat around doing shit all.
Get off your ass, and if you need to start biking around, do it. Drop off resumes EVERYWHERE. Craigslist, if you're careful, is an awesome place to get resumes sent out. (I've gotten my past 4 jobs, including my current one, through CL)
Even if you're not qualified enough, send in a resume. The more you send out, the more likely something will happen.
As for your girlfriend, if she wants space, give it to her. I know if I asked for space, and whoever I was dating was incredibly clingy and missing me, I'd be getting pissed off.
Just chill, take a look at your life, and see what's important to you, and what needs to be done.
Kinda like what Huk said, I guess.
Take one day at a time, be positive, and eventually positivity will come back to you.
If you sit around unhappy about the way things are, and unhappy with yourself(I don't know if you are, but just saying), you're not changing anything. If you can't be happy, how can you make someone else happy?
Hope things work out. 
Although it seems like things can't get any worse, just know, things DO get worse before they get better.
Be positive, and it won't be so bad.
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On October 27 2010 02:02 ProTech_MediC wrote:
I'm going to be 100% honest: get your shit together.
You got laid off in May... it's nearly November. I know the job market is rough out there. I know you don't have an easy mode of transportation. but... come on. There are people out there with no education breaking their backs to put food on the table for their family. There are people out there with debilitating health issues much worse than yours that get out of bed every morning and do their best.
Yet, you watch movies "pretty regularly." Your eSports team is starting to "get serious."
Why aren't you doing some side work? Why aren't you going to job interview after job interview? Why aren't you taking some jobplace skill improvement courses that you could get for free from the employment office? Why aren't you trying to improve your situation?
Stop making so many cry baby excuses for yourself and get something done.
I'm not going to touch on your girlfriend problems, but I'll leave you with this: what kind of future can you provide for her if you don't change anything? Maybe she's starting to think about that question, too.
it's easy to sit back and say things like this until you're actually in the situation yourself.
I only download movies and watch them at night to fall asleep, and the team would go on without me. Yes, I have been doing oddjobs here and there for family or whatever, but when it's my old decrepid grandmother, I don't really expect her to pay me a lot, so when I clean & vacuum her house and sand and paint the trim of her house and only get 26.50$ after 8+ hours I don't complain to her.
Why is it ME that has to provide a future for her? That's the exact kind of reasoning she uses, like women are helpless and need someone to take care of them etc. I understand that I need to get shit together, but she has to as well. This is a joint effort imho and she seems to be breaking away right in the point of the most need.
I'm not making excuses or trying to justify my situation, I'm just venting here and looking for useful advice.
On October 27 2010 02:38 SpicyCrab wrote:
You can contest the ticket by declaration, cant you?
what is this? I actually called them and they said I had 2 options, pay the fine in it's entirety by money order or do a monthly payment plan which adds additional payment fees and blah blah which makes it 100x times worse.
omfg this is awesome, thank you http://www.dwiblog.org/2009/02/best-way-to-contest-a-speeding-ticket-trial-by-declaration/
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On October 27 2010 10:05 CharlieMurphy wrote:
Why is it ME that has to provide a future for her? That's the exact kind of reasoning she uses, like women are helpless and need someone to take care of them etc. I understand that I need to get shit together, but she has to as well. This is a joint effort imho and she seems to be breaking away right in the point of the most need.
I agree with you here. I think a woman needs to get up and help herself before she can expect to be helped.
I had one boyfriend who I was in love with tell me I wasn't doing anything with my life, and all I did was rely on everyone else to get by, and I guess it was true.
I have a better job now(and a better boyfriend), and my life is slowly going forward because I decided I needed to do things on my own before I could do something with someone else.
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if things really get bad enough you can always join the military. if you join in the next month or two you'll probably end up going to basic in january/february/march. they give you a place to live, food, clothes, and pretty much all the money you make goes directly into your pocket since you don't have to pay for all that stuff. check it out.
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EPT
