So today after 5 months in a relationship I decided to break up with my gf. Would like to have some opinions.
I drove off work to go get some products for my shop, on the way my gf works in a pharmacy, I make a stop to say hi. She sits behind the cashier with her sister eating some snack and she doesnt even get out of the cashier to say hello or kiss me (on the cheeks at least). So besides that a few moments later a guy appears that wants to do business with them and I go and type facebook.com to check if my facebook account is indeed deleted (I deleted it yesterday she knows that) appparently she already was on facebook so it automatically logs into her profile so I search my name through her profile 'nothing found so im all happy that its indeed deleted and close the browser, she then turns at me and goes " Hey WHY are you on MY FACEBOOK??????" of course I turn red and go like "are you crazy?" she then starts to start something so I go out and leave on my way to my work. She then calls me and I go "Put your idiot facebook up your ass" she answers "Dont talk to me like that or else" I go like "Shut up you are such an asshole and I dont wanna talk to you right now" I hung up the phone, she then texts me some sms saying that I cant talk to her like that and thats its not appropiate, I say to her that if she wants she can go find someone else and for whatever bullshit she makes to him he can be kind and all drooling over her and that im not that kind of man. She then tells me that she grew up hearing her parents yelling at her etc etc and that she doesnt want her boyfriend to shout at her and that if i dont stop this maybe its better to break up, I go "maybe? why maybe? lets break up, are you doing me a favor saying maybe? " she send back a plain "Ok".
In my point of view she made me look like a total deepshit in front of her sister and the guy we didnt know saying about the facebook shit infront of them.
Anyhow whats ur opinion in this? all my friends say we will sort it out and get back together but I seriously dont feel like talking to her atm. the plain OK was not expected since we both were very serious about our relationship and we love each other etc.
i think you flipped out a bit after the facebook misunderstanding, you should have just told her it signed in automatically and you were only making sure yours was deleted
um... its fucking face book... if anyone ever breaks up over that shit neither should ever be in a relationship, unless of course there were issues with snooping in the past, but if u are in a relationship with the person you shouldnt have anything to hide anyway.
So let me get this straight. You were on her facebook, she asked you why and instead of just saying why, you asked her if she was crazy and told her to put facebook up her ass?
I just can't understand how either of you managed to get upset in this situation.
On May 04 2010 19:19 JohnColtrane wrote: i think you flipped out a bit after the facebook misunderstanding, you should have just told her it signed in automatically and you were only making sure yours was deleted
told her she still didnt apologize for her attitute instead she go on something like this "you should have said so earlier, thanx alot for shouting out me, I really deserved it" ofc I replied "Talking to me that I love you like that for your damn facebook, ofc u deserved it".
On May 04 2010 19:21 nevz wrote: So let me get this straight. You were on her facebook, she asked you why and instead of just saying why, you asked her if she was crazy and told her to put facebook up her ass?
I just can't understand how either of you managed to get upset in this situation.
You didnt get it straight, I typed facebook.com (her page appears logged in) I type in search my name, then instantly close it. I wasnt even looking at her facebook nor I care about her facebook, I deleted mine already.
So you've broken up with your girl, that leaves you many options. 1) The "classy" option. Talk to her, tell her that you aren't breaking up because you got pissed off, but rather that it just didn't work out, the argument was just an expression of tensions under the surface, etc. That way, you eliminate the whole "people think I'm an asshole" element for the equation - the drawbacks: you have to be nice to her.
2) The "regular" option. Get drunk, do someone else, move on. Don't give a shit about what she or her sister think.
3) The AWESOME option. Make up with her, because a relationship has to have arguments. Have awesome make up sex. Be nice to her, have some fun. Post the pics of that event on 4chan.
On May 04 2010 19:28 Kazius wrote: So you've broken up with your girl, that leaves you many options. 1) The "classy" option. Talk to her, tell her that you aren't breaking up because you got pissed off, but rather that it just didn't work out, the argument was just an expression of tensions under the surface, etc. That way, you eliminate the whole "people think I'm an asshole" element for the equation - the drawbacks: you have to be nice to her.
2) The "regular" option. Get drunk, do someone else, move on. Don't give a shit about what she or her sister think.
3) The AWESOME option. Make up with her, because a relationship has to have arguments. Have awesome make up sex. Be nice to her, have some fun. Post the pics of that event on 4chan.
i pick the AWESOME option cause im awesome and legend wait for it, dary.
you did the right thing. if she is truly your "girlfriend", why would she care if you are checking her facebook? what does she have to hide from someone she has such a special bond with? another guy she's flirting with maybe. she doesn't even bother to acknowledge that you're there when you go out of your way to drop by. ungrateful trash.
guys its not the facebook that broke us up, its that she wants a guy that will be all kind to her no matter what she does. I mean in my little world that thing doesnt exist, couples and relationships MUST have intense verbal rant. and Uncle Leo ur an Uncle are you over 40?
How about this: "Hey what are you doing on my facebook"
"I'm checking if my profile is really deleted."
On May 04 2010 19:45 ffswowsucks wrote: guys its not the facebook that broke us up, its that she wants a guy that will be all kind to her no matter what she does. I mean in my little world that thing doesnt exist, couples and relationships MUST have intense verbal rant. and Uncle Leo ur an Uncle are you over 40?
That's such a stupid cliche which is ruining relationships. Just because you read that REAL MEN don't kiss up to women, doesn't mean you need to start looking for every single opportunity to shit on her like that.
However, just by noticing her reaction to your looking at her facebook tells me that your relationship is already fucked up, and that this is just a straw that broke the camel's back. Maybe it's not bad that it's over. Regroup, learn from mistakes and go on.
Even if this relationship gets patched up, I don't see it lasting for long. She does not even trust what you do on her facebook account. I can't see this going anywhere in the long run.
On May 04 2010 19:51 niteReloaded wrote: How about this: "Hey what are you doing on my facebook"
"I'm checking if my profile is really deleted."
It wasnt just a hey yo what are you doing on my facebook with all smiling faces and happy atmosphere. and also I closed it immediatly so I wasnt really doing anything was I ??
On May 04 2010 19:53 IrT4nkz wrote: Even if this relationship gets patched up, I don't see it lasting for long. She does not even trust what you do on her facebook account. I can't see this going anywhere in the long run.
Does it count she told I can login in her facebook whenever I want but I should ask her first?
On May 04 2010 19:45 ohaicami wrote: Try hitting her... then go fuck her sister.
why not hit you instead and be all pleased.
Oh calm down, I was just kidding. Sometimes girls can be pretty fucking stupid. If 5 months into a relationship and she's already treating you like shit, then getting the fuck out was a good idea. It wasn't about FB nor was it about her parental issues. She's obviously just looking for her perfect boyfriend, and is taking whatever it is out on you because you aren't it.
When I meant fuck her sister, I kind of just meant find someone else. There's hella girls out there who aren't complete fools and would be at least a bit more pleasant.
But, whatever, sorry for being a dick. There's my 2cents.
Taking into consideration some of the posts because if I really took serious all of the posts written by some guys I would be going crazy.
Why get old anyway? whats wrong in being a child?
Think about it.
@ LaLuSh , you probably didnt have the time to read all the posts / I explained already that I said why I was on her FB for a mere 3 seconds typing just my name and closing it.
@Cloud your suggestion is bad.
@Sauron , no im not 13, I think im older than most members of this site.
@Adeeler thats a childish post, caring only to have fun with someone doesnt really cut it.
On May 04 2010 21:17 ffswowsucks wrote: Taking into consideration some of the posts because if I really took serious all of the posts written by some guys I would be going crazy. Why get old anyway? whats wrong in being a child?
It's not about getting old. It's about becoming more mature. What's wrong in being a child is that you're not dealing with a relationship or breakup maturely. That doesn't reflect on you two well as people.
I think if shes going to blow up on your over something that minuscule it might not be worth the effort because its bound to happen again. If shes going psycho over it maybe shes even hiding something, although thats pure speculation. If you love her then maybe you guys can work things out but if shes not willing to meet half way I'd say time to move on.
On May 04 2010 21:17 ffswowsucks wrote: Taking into consideration some of the posts because if I really took serious all of the posts written by some guys I would be going crazy.
Why get old anyway? whats wrong in being a child?
Think about it.
@ LaLuSh , you probably didnt have the time to read all the posts / I explained already that I said why I was on her FB for a mere 3 seconds typing just my name and closing it.
@Cloud your suggestion is bad.
@Sauron , no im not 13, I think im older than most members of this site.
@Adeeler thats a childish post, caring only to have fun with someone doesnt really cut it.
But you didn't ask for permission, like she wanted to?
Couldn't log her out and try logging in? You knew prior to this event that she wanted to know when you were on her facebook, so why not tell her as soon as it logged her in, "Oh, hey, the computer logged you in automatically; might wanna do something about that on a public computer."
On May 04 2010 19:51 niteReloaded wrote: How about this: "Hey what are you doing on my facebook"
"I'm checking if my profile is really deleted."
It wasnt just a hey yo what are you doing on my facebook with all smiling faces and happy atmosphere. and also I closed it immediatly so I wasnt really doing anything was I ??
The trick is that you try to create happy atmosphere. you were the one checking others facebook, which is private thing. even if you check it just for 3 seconds and only using the search function. You should apologize even if it had automatic log.
I think you and your gf have many issues to solve, these things you told us are just symptoms of something deeper. Your relationship must be very damaged to any of you react like that for so little... or you just dont want to be together.
So many stupid replies in this thread. I think the replies about growing up are all bullshit.
You did the right thing. I don't have the time or patience to be jumping through all these hoops to avoid fights with a girlfriend, and you shouldn't either. No one should and you should make that perfectly clear.
As for getting back together, who knows? Do you care?
Both of you guys are now much better of. You guys were basically fighting over nothing. She may have always been a bitch but you didn't do your part in avoiding the confrontation, a simple explanation would have sufficed
On May 04 2010 19:21 nevz wrote: So let me get this straight. You were on her facebook, she asked you why and instead of just saying why, you asked her if she was crazy and told her to put facebook up her ass?
I just can't understand how either of you managed to get upset in this situation.
You didnt get it straight, I typed facebook.com (her page appears logged in) I type in search my name, then instantly close it. I wasnt even looking at her facebook nor I care about her facebook, I deleted mine already.
He got it perfectly right, what are you, 12? Breaking up over facebook? And jeez, that breakup convo is so juvenile wtf
I somehow think this could be a troll .... that's how amazed I am at this OP
On May 04 2010 23:56 Chill wrote: So many stupid replies in this thread. I think the replies about growing up are all bullshit.
Welcome to my world xP Facebook leading to break-up sounds like myspace leading to break-up...which is pretty transitional(this chick will just help you find a better one).
On May 04 2010 19:16 ffswowsucks wrote: I go "Put your idiot facebook up your ass" she answers "Dont talk to me like that or else" I go like "Shut up you are such an asshole and I dont wanna talk to you right now"
You want my opinion? To somewhat quote you, You should put your stupid TL blog(z) up your ass."
You want to get with this girl, go apologize like a man. You want to break up with her, do it like a man and not like a weak coward who has to be a dick to get his gf to break up with him because he doesn't have the balls to do it himself.
Your heart should be such that any person would never doubt you when you say you didn't do something. Such a honesty and truthfulness that people will not see bad when they look at you. It's impossible to do, but it's something to strive for. I hope I can be near that level someday.
How do you not see that it's your fault? If my gf was on my Facebook without my permission, the first thing I would do is ask why. If she then flips out on me, why wouldn't I be mad at the fact that she's yelling at me when it should be the other way around?
...This thread scares me. I guess the average age of TL is sub 15 yrs old... I don't see how the girl was at all at fault here. Your reaction was definitely extraordinarily rude though. Poor girl. She's a lot better off without you.
Not to say I haven't been just as infantile and rude to my gf before. I have. But I've never sat back afterwards and said that it was justified.
On May 05 2010 16:37 {88}iNcontroL wrote: i think he is lying about his age somewhere in there.. so that makes this worse.. but at least the breakup story makes more sense.
I cant believe iNcontrol doesnt recognise the photo on my profile which is a close friend of mine, sataNik.I am 26 born 08/08/1984 and the relationship is quite old? we ve been together for 4 months now
That does not sound like a healthy relationship at all. I would've ended it too. Btw not saying anything about who's at fault, it just doesn't sound nice to be in a relationship like that.
You have issues if you're going to dump her over that. If you're really as old as people said you are in this thread then I'm truly disappointed; such immaturity.
I can understand her getting angry about the Facebook thing. It's an invasion of privacy and you've only known her for 5 months, which really isn't that long. Plus, some people just have privacy issues in general. But for you to dump her because your ego was hurt or your public image was slightly tainted in the eyes two people (one of them being someone you don't even know), well.. that's just plain stupid.
More importantly, if you're not willing to be embarrassed by your girlfriend then you don't belong together.
Next time you're going to delete something she recorded on TV and you'll be forced to throw her down a flight of stairs because that will be the only appropriate response to her questioning you.
On May 06 2010 18:59 tonight wrote: Next time you're going to delete something she recorded on TV and you'll be forced to throw her down a flight of stairs because that will be the only appropriate response to her questioning you.
maybe ur talking about urself.
Also I realized I was a dick somehow but she also realized her behavior was shit, she apologized, I apologized, end of story. Thanx to some people and about all the bad comments, someday ull be in the same situation.
Uh.. She has the right of being mad if you logged into her facebook, it doesn't go through most people's heads that you'd do that just to check if your account is deleted. What you should have done? Explained it like a normal person. "I was just checking if my profile was already gone". She would either go "oh, ok, sorry" or she wouldn't believe you and start a fight. THEN you would have the right to get mad and flip out. Responding like that was pretty childish of y--- oh..
On May 06 2010 18:59 tonight wrote: Next time you're going to delete something she recorded on TV and you'll be forced to throw her down a flight of stairs because that will be the only appropriate response to her questioning you.
maybe ur talking about urself.
Also I realized I was a dick somehow but she also realized her behavior was shit, she apologized, I apologized, end of story. Thanx to some people and about all the bad comments, someday ull be in the same situation.
That's good. Try to be calmer next time. Remember women tend to be very emotionally unstable, and it's your job as her man to try and keep things tight.
EPT
