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On January 12 2010 18:30 spetial wrote:
Religion is a fucking huge deal for these christians. I tried to get over that hump several times and it just doesnt work. It always came down to the fact that i was a godless heathen and trying to turn her to the dark side. its like i was fucking darth vader.....just keep searching and youll find her. it happened to me and i then i had to move from atlanta to tunica 2 weeks later. so instead of spending all my time with this amazing girl....im here dreaming about her every night wishing i was laying next to her instead of alone in the middle of a cotton field degen town. FUCK im depressed now. if its gonna be a long distance thing....shes gotta be the one and shes gotta be on your level (state of mind/politics/religion).....even then its brutal....trust me.
Sorry to hear that. T_T I'm sure something will work out!
Thanks everybody!  So I've drawn a few conclusions:
1.) If it's true love, people will learn to make compromises either way.
2.) Long distance relationships don't work.
And since I'm in no rush, I guess I'll just see how things go over the next few years! If I find another girl along the way, then yippee! But if it turns out what I feel for her is real and there is some reciprocation on her end, I'll give it all the time it needs!
Thanks again! <3
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On January 12 2010 21:49 Piste wrote:Show nested quote +On January 12 2010 15:30 Kennigit wrote:
Do. Not. Do. It. Trust me. I'm a christian (albeit a terrible one) and have tried going out with all types of athiests/agnostics (do you know how hard it is to find a christian girl who doesn't mind a little pre marital sex? QUITE HARD!) . It only ends in tears. Save yourself the trouble. what the hell? every christian I know fuck like rabbits.
do rabbits really?
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On January 12 2010 21:49 Piste wrote:Show nested quote +On January 12 2010 15:30 Kennigit wrote:
Do. Not. Do. It. Trust me. I'm a christian (albeit a terrible one) and have tried going out with all types of athiests/agnostics (do you know how hard it is to find a christian girl who doesn't mind a little pre marital sex? QUITE HARD!) . It only ends in tears. Save yourself the trouble. what the hell? every christian I know fuck like rabbits.
Finding an attractive christian girl who is ok with pre-marital sex is like winning the lottery
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As a Christian guy, I have had similar issues though in somewhat the opposite direction. Though my advice may be inaccurate since, well, she's a girl, I'm not, I'll give you my two cents.
My advice is simple. You mentioned she accepts others' views rationally, politely, etc. Just do the same, assuming you want a long term relationship. Respect her views and opinions. Withthaf prerequisite, you should definitely go for it. Keep in mind though, she may try to "evagelize" you. I don't mean in a Bible thumper way, but maybe ask if you want to go to church, or a Christian outing. I suppose be open minded, and don't try to avoid them because "you're atheist."
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On January 13 2010 06:29 Archaic wrote:
As a Christian guy, I have had similar issues though in somewhat the opposite direction. Though my advice may be inaccurate since, well, she's a girl, I'm not, I'll give you my two cents.
My advice is simple. You mentioned she accepts others' views rationally, politely, etc. Just do the same, assuming you want a long term relationship. Respect her views and opinions. Withthaf prerequisite, you should definitely go for it. Keep in mind though, she may try to "evagelize" you. I don't mean in a Bible thumper way, but maybe ask if you want to go to church, or a Christian outing. I suppose be open minded, and don't try to avoid them because "you're atheist."
It's never an ideological problem in the end for people like this. The real problem is they just want to fuck.
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Not looking good going into this from the outset:
1. long distance relationships are extremely hard enough to maintain as is. But also throw in the fact that...
2. you are atheist and she is christian. Now, there are varying levels of devotion, so my first question would be 'how devout is she'? If she's extremely devout, kiss the relationship goodbye unless you convert to Christianity (the bible strongly recommends that christians marry other christians).
3. How important is sexual compatibility for you? If it is very important, be ready for some serious friction should she decide that she wants to wait until she is married before having sex. I personally won't get married unless I know I'm sexually compatible with my partner, and we have proven that we can live together for at least 6 months. However, you may be different.
Taking these 3 things together into consideration, I would say the chances of having a good, healthy, successful relationship are next to nothing, and as such it would almost be a waste of time pursuing this girl.
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I would pick the first option, but if you are 3000 miles away that's really not going to work, I don't think.
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On January 13 2010 06:19 Xenocide_Knight wrote:Show nested quote +On January 12 2010 21:49 Piste wrote:On January 12 2010 15:30 Kennigit wrote:
Do. Not. Do. It. Trust me. I'm a christian (albeit a terrible one) and have tried going out with all types of athiests/agnostics (do you know how hard it is to find a christian girl who doesn't mind a little pre marital sex? QUITE HARD!) . It only ends in tears. Save yourself the trouble. what the hell? every christian I know fuck like rabbits. Finding an attractive christian girl who is ok with pre-marital sex is like winning the lottery
Not in Canada.
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On January 13 2010 09:09 lMPERVlOUS wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2010 06:19 Xenocide_Knight wrote:On January 12 2010 21:49 Piste wrote:On January 12 2010 15:30 Kennigit wrote:
Do. Not. Do. It. Trust me. I'm a christian (albeit a terrible one) and have tried going out with all types of athiests/agnostics (do you know how hard it is to find a christian girl who doesn't mind a little pre marital sex? QUITE HARD!) . It only ends in tears. Save yourself the trouble. what the hell? every christian I know fuck like rabbits. Finding an attractive christian girl who is ok with pre-marital sex is like winning the lottery Not in Canada.
Always did want to move to Canada..
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Unless she's really religious or something I don't see what the problem is. These days I don't think religion matters much, so that seems like a non-issue to me. Go for it if you think there's a chance.
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is it really that do or die? can't you just kind of feel out the waters and let it grow into something more?
I know its bitch to say yo, but if she was really worth 3k miles + the discomfort of trying not to offend her religious views, wouldn't you like.... not have to post a blog about it?
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On January 12 2010 15:17 love1another wrote:
Now the problem:
She goes to school nearby (our hometown), but I now go to school 3000 miles away. Distance and time-zones make communication tedious and a mutual friend has thoroughly advised me in not so many words to drop it because "long-distance relationships don't work."
Long distance relationships don't work. They're just horrible. It takes about 1,000 words to give a brief overview as to why they suck, but I'm pretty sure you can figure most of it out. She's not the only nice/cute girl you'll meet. It's not worth it. Also, different beliefs systems just makes this an even worse idea. Conflicting viewpoints usually don't matter early on (due to the vices of infatuation), but it doesn't take long before they creep up on you.
But hey, since you're actually considering this, like most people end up doing, at least once, you may as well just do it. Ask her to be a slave to your text messages and late night phone calls. Tell yourself that you both don't need to look at other options, ever. Convince yourself that as long as you care about it each other, differences can't tear you apart. After all, you never know how bad of an idea something is until it's you that is neck-deep in shit you've brought upon yourself. Then you'll be like, "What a completely waste of time and emotions, opportunities lost, and so on. I should have listened to those StarCraft guys online." Just promise me when things fail, you won't ever consider this route ever again.
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EPT
