Dota 2 QQ thread - Page 783

Get a lastpick jungle LD, goes the infernal double midas build. Against a spectre. Normally that would pretty much be the story, but my team was not content with that comparatively small amount of fail.

I’m a solo offlane weaver (we have a visage+es safelane and a jungle LD. Do not ask.) who had a pretty rough time, but I do my job and make space midgame. Gameplan: stall for LD. Stall long long time.

Except, every single time their pudge even thinks about pressing his hook button, our storm spirit makes himself available. When he’s not getting hooked, storm spends all his time initiating on obvious bait heroes, blowing up and then going “omg laaaaaaaaag”. Whatever, we can deal with one feeder.

Visage doesn’t build mek and I’m pretty sure never skilled birds, but is otherwise warding etc. ES is afk for impossibly long stretches, never wards, and has a tendency to get excited and double-tap blink so he echo slams a random location in the jungle rather than their team. Alright, I'm not sure I can deal with all of these players at once, but their spec is building vanguard so all is not lost.

Anyway, we hold on as best we can while the aforementioned LD afks and spectre freefarms. LD finally comes out of jungle with rad+AC but is about three levels behind spectre. Idk, whatever, this is as close to a peak as we'll get. Let’s push. We somehow win the teamfight, and then get a rax because radiance + AC + my deso are good items toi have. I die in the push, and the others wipe later because they decide the ruins of the enemy’s rax were a good place for a tea party. Mercifully, the bad guys are content to go back to farming.

So we’re a rax up against a massively fat spectre (who, admittedly, bought dumb as heck items), with an AC rad LD and a deso BKB weaver. Splitpush like crazy while baiting spec’s ult, no?

No.

The story of the rest of the game is as follows:

LD: “guys we can win hue hue hue I backdoor”
Me: "Please don't."
*Lone Druid has purchased Boots of Travel!*
LD: “guys just def hue hue hue”
Me: "...are you serious."

LD BoTs to their base, gets a tower or something and dies when they tp back.
*Lone druid has bought back!*
LD: “guys just def hue hue hue”
Me: "Dude come on!."
LD tps to their base again, gets a rax and dies again.
LD: “guys just def I’ll be there in 60 seconds”
Me: “…are you serious.”

Enemy team pushes to our base.
SS: “guys let’s gank spectre, she’s the only one there and she’s just outside our base!”
Me: “…”
SS goes.
*Spectre has pwned Storm Spirit’s head for 300 gold!*
SS: “OMG WTF LAAAAAG”
The supports go in after him. I oscillate between screaming and going to feed with them. I decide to do both.
*Their whole team has pwned our whole team’s heads for a bajillion gold*

*Lone Druid has respawned!*
*Weaver and Storm Spirit have bought back!”
LD: “guys just def I backdoor hue hue hue”
Me: “….are you serious.”

LD TPs to their base, gets another tower and dies for the third time
LD: “guys I don’t have buyback….”
Me: “….no shit”

They push back to our base. We are pretty much doomed, but I throw bugs and try to stall it out.
SS: “Let’s get pudge!”
Me: “….”
SS jumps on their now 5k HP pudge
*Spectre has pwned Storm Spirit’s head for 300 gold!*
SS: “OMG LAAAAG”

Enemy team takes all sets of raxes and thrones.
LD: “OMG NOOB TEAM REPORT”

Friggin’ groundhog day, man.