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Off-Topic General Discussion - Page 5082

Forum Index > The Shopkeeper′s Inn
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mordek
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States12705 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:43:46
May 26 2015 18:42 GMT
#101621
On May 27 2015 03:35 WaveofShadow wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 27 2015 03:12 mordek wrote:
On May 27 2015 03:11 Requizen wrote:
Holy shit I nearly had a heart attack. I thought my stool was bloody red and I was dying but then I remembered I ate red velvet cake last night and I'm probably not bleeding internally. I was legit about to go to the doctor's.

Red is actually not that bad, when it's black (dead red blood cells) is when you're in real trouble. But I mean yeah doctors are good.

IIRC from my "What's Your Poo Telling You" book.

Reds not great. Trust me.

Yes but the bleeding is much closer to the exit which generally is less serious. I mean if you're bleeding from your anus, might be a good idea to get it checked out regardless. If you have hemorrhoids it's probably just that.
+ Show Spoiler +
It is vanity to love what passes quickly and not to look ahead where eternal joy abides. Tiberius77 | Mordek #1881 "I took a mint!"
Ketara
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States15065 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:43:48
May 26 2015 18:43 GMT
#101622
I had a poop that was bright orange like the inside of a sweet potato once.

It was while travelling.
http://www.liquidlegends.net/forum/lol-general/502075-patch-61-league-of-legends-general-discussion?page=25#498
jcarlsoniv
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States27922 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:44:07
May 26 2015 18:43 GMT
#101623
On May 27 2015 03:42 Gahlo wrote:
Only time I pooped black was after I had to drink liquid charcoal. That was the most painful shit I've ever had. Also pooped white once because of something I had to drink for a stomach scan thing.


Pepto Bismol makes you shit black for a while too

edit - we are now literally shit posting
Soniv ||| Soniv#1962 ||| @jcarlsoniv ||| The Big Golem ||| Join the Glorious Evolution. What's your favorite aminal, a bear? ||| Joe "Don't call me Daniel" "Soniv" "Daniel" Carlsberg LXIX ||| Paging Dr. John Shadow
AsmodeusXI
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States15536 Posts
May 26 2015 18:43 GMT
#101624
On May 27 2015 03:18 Cixah wrote:
Asmo took some tl guy first and I grab burger king. Burgerking is always the right first pick.


Excuse me I took ALL the TL guys because the ONLY correct strat for fantasy is to PUT YOUR FAITH IN THE LIQUID.
WriterTL > RL. BNet: Asmodeus#1187 - LoL: DJForeclosure - Steam: asmodeusxi | www.n3rddimension.com
Ketara
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States15065 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:45:57
May 26 2015 18:45 GMT
#101625
On May 27 2015 03:43 Ketara wrote:
I had a poop that was bright orange like the inside of a sweet potato once.

It was while travelling.


I suppose I should mention that a few days later I got incredibly sick and almost died. I guess they may have been related.
http://www.liquidlegends.net/forum/lol-general/502075-patch-61-league-of-legends-general-discussion?page=25#498
Slayer91
Profile Joined February 2006
Ireland23444 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:46:27
May 26 2015 18:46 GMT
#101626
LOL
that sort of changes everything
Ketara
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States15065 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:50:38
May 26 2015 18:48 GMT
#101627
You know, looking back on it, I have almost died while travelling a few times.

I've gotten multiple diseases that are potentially fatal.

I've become dehydrated to the point of needing to be hospitalized for it.

I've been attacked by dogs.

I was almost attacked by a wild monkey.

I've had a pretty awesome life, all things considered. I'm happy today.
http://www.liquidlegends.net/forum/lol-general/502075-patch-61-league-of-legends-general-discussion?page=25#498
Slayer91
Profile Joined February 2006
Ireland23444 Posts
May 26 2015 18:50 GMT
#101628
aggressive playstyle
ComaDose
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada10357 Posts
May 26 2015 18:50 GMT
#101629
i think i could take a monkey if i had a bat or something
BW pros training sc2 is like kiss making a dub step album.
Slayer91
Profile Joined February 2006
Ireland23444 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-26 18:51:26
May 26 2015 18:50 GMT
#101630
the fuck monkeys are pussies are you serious
they weigh like 75lbs tops
Ketara
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States15065 Posts
May 26 2015 18:52 GMT
#101631
The monkey story is pretty fun. I've told Scip.
http://www.liquidlegends.net/forum/lol-general/502075-patch-61-league-of-legends-general-discussion?page=25#498
ComaDose
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada10357 Posts
May 26 2015 18:54 GMT
#101632
STORY TIME.

but what about a chimp or ape teut?
BW pros training sc2 is like kiss making a dub step album.
jcarlsoniv
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States27922 Posts
May 26 2015 19:00 GMT
#101633
holy shit I forgot how good Muse's Absolution album is
Soniv ||| Soniv#1962 ||| @jcarlsoniv ||| The Big Golem ||| Join the Glorious Evolution. What's your favorite aminal, a bear? ||| Joe "Don't call me Daniel" "Soniv" "Daniel" Carlsberg LXIX ||| Paging Dr. John Shadow
Gahlo
Profile Joined February 2010
United States35174 Posts
May 26 2015 19:01 GMT
#101634
On May 27 2015 03:54 ComaDose wrote:
STORY TIME.

but what about a chimp or ape teut?

AlterKot
Profile Blog Joined January 2014
Poland7525 Posts
May 26 2015 19:03 GMT
#101635
On May 27 2015 03:48 Ketara wrote:
You know, looking back on it, I have almost died while travelling a few times.

I've gotten multiple diseases that are potentially fatal.

I've become dehydrated to the point of needing to be hospitalized for it.

I've been attacked by dogs.

I was almost attacked by a wild monkey.

I've had a pretty awesome life, all things considered. I'm happy today.

"Hey guys if you're not sure whether to go to college or what to do in life, consider travelling for a year!"
Americans don't like to use unblockables, it is considered not honest. You press a button at the wrong time and hit the other person, you are random, not a top player. You DP Sim's far fierce, it is random and not honest.
Ketara
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States15065 Posts
May 26 2015 19:14 GMT
#101636
So, in India they have basically two kinds of monkeys.

There's the brown monkeys. These guys are small and there's lots of them and they're the ones you usually interact with. They are the biggest assholes on the planet. They're just smart enough to piss you off, and just stupid enough to not give a shit about it. It's like, picture a 14 year old who vandalizes your house repeatedly, but can't be arrested for it. That's what they're like. Everybody hates them.

But they're also not very dangerous. When you see one you just shoo it away and it runs. The worst they do is steal things. One snapped my ethernet cord and cut off my internet once. I hated him.


Then there's the white monkeys, or the Hanuman Langurs. These are bigger, stronger, and somewhat solitary. They live high up in trees and don't mess with people. But the thing is, if you mess with them, they get violent. They fight by doing the normal biting and scratching, but they also whip with their tails like a weapon, and can do so hard enough to actually cut you. The brown monkeys don't fuck with them, because if they do, the white monkeys kill them.

Every once in a while there's a story about somebody getting into a fight with a white monkey for whatever reason, and it usually ends with the human in the hospital and the white monkey getting away unscathed. If there's nobody around to stop the fight and the human isn't big enough and strong enough, they may well get killed. These guys aren't bigger than you, but they're way faster and probably stronger, and when cornered give absolutely zero fucks.


So, I was up in the mountains one day, and walking along a nice pleasant path back to my hotel, with forest on one side and cliff face on the other. Pretty gorgeous. And I happened to see a white monkey sitting on the edge of the cliff face looking out at the view.

This was pretty sweet, because these guys are fairly solitary. It's not as though I'd never seen one, but they're high up in the trees and hard to get a good look at, and often asleep during the day. So to have one awake, down to earth, and completely preoccupied with himself is a rare treat right.

Obviously I had to take a picture of him.

However, for some dumbfuck reason my camera was set to forced flash and I didn't realize it. So I take the picture and the flash goes off, which startles the monkey. He gets PISSED. He turns around immediately, snarls and bares his teeth, gets all big and yells, and jumps up to block my way so I am now between him and the cliff face.

I was fairly shocked, and did not really know what to do. You can't run from these guys because they are faster than you, and much like most wild animals they will attack the instant you turn your back to them. And you can't win a fight with one of these either. Or at least I can't, being a pasty white boy. Perhaps if you were somebody who was actually trained in how to fight people, you would be able to.

So I did the only other thing that came to mind, and I bluffed. I got all big and snarled and bared my teeth and put my arms up. And we snarled and yelled at each other like morons for a few seconds.

And then the monkey decided I was fucking crazy or something and ran off into the trees, and I went home unmolested.

I told a local friend about it afterwards and he said this is exactly what you do in that situation, because it's what the monkey understands, and if I had done anything else it's entirely possible that I would have been killed.

But I was not. And I still have the picture.
http://www.liquidlegends.net/forum/lol-general/502075-patch-61-league-of-legends-general-discussion?page=25#498
Scip
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Czech Republic11293 Posts
May 26 2015 19:19 GMT
#101637
lol gotta use the fact that while you're pretty much a sack of unskilled fat (compared to monkeys anyway) you're so fucking big that pretty much everything's afraid of you, gg.
"It may be pleasurable for some of us to imagine being ravished" - Christopher Hitchens in a debate with feminists RIP 2011 Psalm 2:9 You shall break them with a rod of iron
Ketara
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States15065 Posts
May 26 2015 19:20 GMT
#101638
Well I mean, the monkey just thinks you're a bigger monkey than he is.

He is technically not wrong.
http://www.liquidlegends.net/forum/lol-general/502075-patch-61-league-of-legends-general-discussion?page=25#498
Ethelis
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States2400 Posts
May 26 2015 19:27 GMT
#101639
So why isn't your champ icon Wukong man.
Disabled gamer - Diamond 3 (LoL) D+ Rank scrublord on BW. Bisu doesnt need DTs, He uses probes. just ask Flash.
Scip
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Czech Republic11293 Posts
May 26 2015 19:29 GMT
#101640
Well, TECHNICALLY humans aren't monkeys, but apes, no?
"It may be pleasurable for some of us to imagine being ravished" - Christopher Hitchens in a debate with feminists RIP 2011 Psalm 2:9 You shall break them with a rod of iron
Prev 1 5080 5081 5082 5083 5084 5162 Next
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