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Beyonder
Netherlands15103 Posts
On September 16 2006 04:47 Liquid`Drone wrote:
haha
im kinda sorry about not telling people before (known for 1 1/2 years pretty much) but a combination of not wanting people to know I had lied about something incredibly stupid and well, enjoyment from watching the character keep up the act (as I never told the person behind zia that I knew either) kept me from it
i'll write a longer post about all this someday if people are curious
actually first i'll read all the replies here I guess that'll let me know if anyone are
Wow, that's pretty fucking sad right there.
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Norway28525 Posts
haha
ok I will write a longer story explaining everything.
about 2 1/2 years ago, I was studying but not studying and spending every day getting high and roughly every third day getting drunk
this is a destructive behaviour and eventually I found myself well, not doing anything productive at all. I just.. were. I didn't feel bad about it at that time, but I guess this was because I was constantly high.
then suddenly this icedearth character starts posting on tl.net, and I start talking to "her". (i'll just refer to zia as that from old habit  )
we talked for some months and then suddenly after 3 months or so she's suddenly really sad one day explaining how she has to go to korea because her dad was near death in the hospital because of alcohol poisoning. this makes me (and many others) especially sad and sympathetic because we like this person, I'd be sad if any dad of a bnet friend of mine was close to death. ;( so we were of course telling this person how saddened we were and how we thought she was a great person, basically not very different from the busted leg thread
she got my phone number and said she was perhaps going to call from korea when she got there if she needed someone to talk to
and then 5 minutes before she leaves, after like pretending there was something she had to tell me that she wasn't able to say, she starts going
you know, heh, this is incredibly different from anything I have ever told anyone about love
but I love you.
and im like
heh
and then she's like
lempiä te
and logs off
then I go right to google and search for +"i love you" +finnish
and waddayaknow it's lempiä te
so I end up believing it
and eventually feelings and sympathy and self-dislike as I am at this point no longer high, and broke, because I had spent such a long time getting high and drunk that I had spent all the money I was supposed to have that summer, however I am still not doing anything productive (and I failed every course I had that semester) (this was around may. we first started talking around february)
having her email and everything, I write her a mail telling her how I really care about her and really feel for her and hope everything was going to be fine
eventually down in the email somewhere adding
Exclusively Random Individual Always Delivering Original Rape (which was the line I added to my RANDOMINATOR profile to let clever people figuring out my aka, as it had been started out as a smurf account. )
Lachrymosely Over Vacuity Ensuing Stellar Zestbringers Indefinite Absense
(which, to those who don't feel like dictionarying up things, would mean something like
tearful over the empty space following the shining bringer of zest's (joy, happiness, zestbringer was a word I had to make up, but calling someone a zebra is not very romantic. ) indefinite absense
while also spelling out I love you
I thought it was a brilliantly crafted piece of romance anyway
shouldve kept all those emails because they were just incredibly great. :D
then one day she manages to go to a internet cafe in korea and we talk a bunch more and well, I end up waiting for her to get back to finland (which she probably did in july or something. ) and we well, show mutual interest in meeting eachother
all this time I had like, growing feelings for her (as I had nothing else I wanted to do, I ended up spending a long time thinking and philosophizing, zia ended up being an inspiration, something to aim for, and well, we talked a lot, and basically decided on "let's meet and then figure stuff out"
however then one day, she had the funny idea of fucking with fayth, and told him that me and zia had already met, and were together
and well I thought this was funny at that time so I followed up. it didn't really seem like I were lying, because in my imagination, a meeting was not that far away.
anyway, after she told fayth, we would often be watching replays together with well, both fayth and other people
and then it became important to keep up the act around those people as well, because otherwise fayth would find out and the joke died or something
eventually, this made everyone knowm and eventually our state of being in a relationship happened to apply to us as well
and honestly, it created some really funny jokes and situations, and well.. we matched like
cha zam
finishing each others jokes and thoughtlines pretty often, and having really many cool conversations
I would be smiling and laughing pretty much constantly during this phase, I had started working now and I was generally really really happy, even though I somehow had a girlfriend I had not met.
I actually never told my real life friends about it though. I figured I was going to surprise them one day through suddenly having a hot chick with me. what I said was limited to "so I've met this chick who is the sister of the guitarist in sonata arctica she's pretty cool"
I remember feeling forced to lie about it at worldcybergames "in real life" too because well, I got asked about it, and I didn't mind talking about her, as at that time I was still under the belief that I was going to meet her really soon.
but then eventually as time went by, we never met and stuff wasn't as great anymore. she eventually budged and gave her reasons for not having been able to meet me, saying how even though she deeply trusted and loved me, it was incredibly hard for her both to come visit me, and to give me her address, because the last time she had given someone her address through the internet, she had ended up getting gangraped. (she was always racist towards chinese like even in the first conversation I had with her more than 6 months before this, and blamed this on them being chinese)
this made me very sad to hear and it was said in a very.. believable way, and well, I had read quite a bit about the psychology of rape victims and her personality really fit with it. this zia person had incredibly many issues actually, having been suicidal, but she also had incredibly many good qualities. she would also often tell me how I was the by far best thing in her life and how incredibly important I was to her, so I almost never put any real pressure on, because I was afraid how she'd respond to it. and, while of course, there were occasional holes in her stories (and she did admit to having lied several times, but she explained that those lies were only lies she told me to make me like her because she was playing a character stripped of real confidence, in the sense that she did not like herself. (a lot of fake toughness though. ) so I was weighing up real/fake reasons and sort of thought that "no way in hell does someone pretend to be another person 8 hours daily for 6 months." although I also always had the feeling she was american not finnish, largely because of the way she spelt. she'd misspell apparently "apparantly" pretty often, and that is only a spelling mistake made by americans, and definitely not by people who learn to write seperately from learning to talk (which zia claimed was the case. )
but I was afraid that if she were real, me showing distrust would make her kill herself. and even if I leaned towards her being fake, I could not confront her with it because what happened if she was indeed fake? either she was fake and gave me a bullshit story that I would either believe or not believe, (or went out in public and at that point, I was much less interested in that happening than now) or she gave me a real story, or she was real but still gave me a bullshit story, or she was real and killed herself. it seemed like I couldn't really gain anything.
as time went by however (we stayed "together" for about 6 months or so, including 2 "breakups" because she would never meet me but she then pretended to become incredibly upset and crying really hard, and then I told her that I really didnt want to break up but we would really have to meet soon to which she replied that she really was going to)
she also ended up moving to usa, and that was it for me. we still stayed friends though, but had decided to end everything else after it became really clear she wouldn't have time to come to meet me before she went to usa. the thing is, during these last months (from october to january pretty much), zia the character was in a constant state of horrid depression and illness. at this point I had of course also thought of the possibility of her not being real, however, I was afraid that if she were, me pressing on to much could well
make her end it.
then eventually, not that long after she had moved, I was messaging her one night
going
hey
hey
hey
hey
on msn
and well, apparently zia's brother was there alone at that time, and responded being annoyed by the msn sounds he went "hey dude he's not here right now stop doing that"
and in true eriadorian fashion, I started laughing out loud
it was a fucking beautifully executed hoax that's for sure.
and it left me emotionally educated like no other. as weird as it might seem, I'm glad it all happened. I enjoyed it more than I disliked it (we had amazing conversations) and I learned amazingly much about both myself and well, people.
and now I was free.
I do regret lying about it later, but it was mostly because I didn't want to have to come out and tell this story to everyone, and I didn't see how not knowing hurt people. but just saying "yeah" when someone asked me if I met her was much less well.. time consuming than telling them no and the entire story, and I didn't want to talk about it before, as well, realizing you fell in love with a guy over the internet is slightly embarassing. just slightly. :D
I have no hard feelings about it all whatsoever tho. I was incredibly stupid and naive in many ways but then again you gotta experience to learn. =]
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Rpf will be crushed.
Honestly don't care. Didn't buy the knee story (I PMed myself saying so).
And to tell you the truth... well I'll keep it to myself for now. (-:  )))) HAHHAHAH  ]] >;-]
My only problem was that Zia should've been banned. Said so before. Zia spammed threads more than rpf.
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On September 16 2006 05:28 Rekrul wrote:
9/15/2006 7:08:38 AM Dan More metal than your mama's kettle and the fact taht you never once changed ur msn name
9/15/2006 7:08:49 AM Dan More metal than your mama's kettle fucking people with vaginas have a tendency to change their msn names like crazy
Lol, i do even less than you do pussie :D
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Norway28525 Posts
definitely should have came out when that leg thread was created though. didn't realize people cared that much, although I guess that's pretty weak as I cared that much myself before.
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This is just sad.
I have known about this for a looooong time, since Zia-person absolutely wanted to join cF. He/she told me how desperate ppl was to make him/her join their clan, to "advertise" for it. Becos he/she was famous. She also told me how every progamer i knew the name of was eating out of her hand. She had then RIGHT where she wanted them, and they just loved her. Zias words. Never seen anyone willing to do so much just to get their way. Not ever. Even funnier when she asked TreK ( the guy i live with) if he had "a thing for her". We both laughed our asses off.
Did not take me long to find out that there was something totally wrong with this person. I talked to one of the finnish guys, and he told me that Zia did not even speak finnish at all. Hmm... weird for a person coming from Finland or what? Then i traced his/her ip on the forum.... It was fra a state in USA... Tennessee. Then i asked Ilvy to do a trace on Wgt, and she came up with the same state in USA. I asked a third friend to do the same.... he came up with the same town and the same state in USA. I used a bot to ping him/her on bnet, us east. He/she had a ping on 16-31. Noone from europe has a ping under 100, no matter how good connection they have. So i knew he/she lied. This person was in USA, and not in Finland. Im not even sure he/she has even been to Finland. But i know that he/she loves Nightwish, and they are from Finland... nice country to pick if u are gonna fake a person on the internet. So i was not very surprised when i heard that the relationship to Eriador was over, apparantly becos Zia was going to USA to study. Guess where? Indeed... same town and the same state we have traced him/her a long time ago.
This is a person who absolutely CRAVED for attention. Everything he/she did was to get attention. And he/she got exactly what he/she wanted. No wonder it must have been hard to come clean and tell the truth. Then on top of all... the relationship to Eriador. As long as u dont hurt anyone, you can do whatever you want. BUT... thats not the case with Zia. He/she took the "joke" way too far.
I really feel sorry for Eriador. I can only imagine what he feels about this.
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Norway28525 Posts
hey I don't feel bad about this at all anymore and I'm not angry at the person behind it at all
(for what she did towards me anyway. the busted leg post was really bad.  )
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United Kingdom10597 Posts
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United Kingdom10597 Posts
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HonestTea
5007 Posts
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Aotearoa39261 Posts
hmmm "zia" hasnt said a word...
interesting
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Norway28525 Posts
I don't think icedearth will be posting more
perhaps tho
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Beyonder
Netherlands15103 Posts
how on earth can you let it go this far as an adult?
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the talented mr. ripley
for the sake of this guy/girls i hope he did this as a joke or a way to test how long and far he could have u guys thinkin he was a girl...i hope its not one of those deep emotional psychotic situations where the person starts to believe they are the identity they have created, u kno, the wierd shit u see on CSI sometimes or those crime drama's on tv.
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Norway28525 Posts
I like trusting people
which I guess is funny as ive shown myself as not trustworthy in this aspect
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United Arab Emirates5090 Posts
ok uhh wtf like here are a few things i didnt really know about
i didnt know that zia was a girl when i read the busted legs thread, i just felt really sad that one of this community was not gona walk anymore.
and now i find out that she is a guy... and this was continued for so long... wtf man like someone is really really disturbed haahaha.
anyway i think its good that its all cleared up now, and well whenever i meet "girls" while playing games im really really sceptical that theyre really girls so yea...
oh and i have no idea who in TL is a girl so plz dont kill me if i reply ur post or smthn refering to u as "dude" or "guy" or w/e
the thing abt fisheye being so warhearted i think was good, you should not blame him for benig fooled, but should blame the person who was fooling him. personally i think fisheye had real heart to do smthn like that.
and well to anyone here on TL trying to earn themselves the title as "greatest pretender of al time" just stop it cuz its just worthless and when you do get busted its just like when ppl find the lowlives that masturbate to the jet stream in jacuzzis.
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United Arab Emirates5090 Posts
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this got me really depressed, especially after drones story
i actually feel sorry for "zia" feeling he has to play a role in order to be someone, and that many hours a day. probably got no friends etc. and feel sorry for drone to, even tho he doesnt admit he feels sorry about it, i know for sure that anyone who fall in love in a person, and then realizes it isnt the person he thought it was, would be really sad. i would also feel emberassed and stupid, not saying drone are, anyone would have gotten fooled by a person with such dedication to his character.
bleh
what an ass
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EPT
