The evil organizations of SC2 - a guide

On October 19 2012 19:06 Fenrax wrote:
Currently there are so many evil organizations in Starcraft 2 busy killing the game that it is hard to keep track. But don't worry, here is a detailed overview. Complete with what methods they use to accomplish their goal and a grade of how powerful-evil they truly are.


Activision Blizzard

goal: control
method: copyright despotism

Once a good company Blizzard was infiltrated by the wicked Activision and soon turned to the dark side. By refusing to implement the 1990s technology of LAN into their games Blizzad has achieved control over every game that is ever played. Now if someone wanted to market SC2 without doing exactly as they want they could just pull the plug. They could do that anyway as shown in the Kespa-Blizzard conflict but a trial would target only the right people and not the innocent majority. And that is of course not desirable if you are a proud powerhouse of evil like Blizzard.
You'd think they'd be interested in making money with SC2 but that is clearly not the case. They make enough money with WoW and Diablo3 so for SC2 their are only interest is to control every aspect of the game even if that means less money for them.
If you are in doubt about how evil Blizzard has truly become by now, just take a quick look at a few of their victims (nsfw). There are not many things as cruel and coldblooded as the mutilation of the Diablo gameplay and the Starcraft chat interface.

Extremely powerful and evil to the bone, Blizzard scores an overwhelming

9.5/10


Kespa
goals: money, getting away with being as obnoxious as possible
methods: bullying, despotism, pissing off everyone, lying, disqualifications, exploitation, stalling, boycotts, blackmail

The Korean Esports Association (Kespa) is a former rival of Blizzard that lost the intellectual property war against them and is now their bootlicker. From time to time they try evil evil things again just out of habit like randomly forbidding their players to participate in the GSL but one call from their new master who felt his authory challenged was enough and they went back into a fetal position.
Kespa's evil glory clearly lies in the past and if you weren't around back then you have missed a lot: killing GOMTV's Broodwar ambitions by forbidding their players to participate, dqing players for random shit (typing pp instead of ppp, typing "a", accidentally pressing ESC before the game even started), installing a koreawide SC:BW monopoly through shady means, exploiting young players through semi-legal trade rules and much much more. In short Kespa brought asshattery to a new level.

In overall evilness they would clearly deserve a 10 on the scale but with their recent decline in power they can't get the full score. But don't you be concerned, if they ever get an ounce of power back they will once again abuse it like no one else can.

8/10


MLG
goal: keep Esports as small as possible
methods: PPVs, Extended Series

The Major League Gaming (MLG) was founded 10 years ago with the exclusive goal of hindering Esports growth. This might seem like a strange goal but their actions leave no other explanation. Their tactic is pretty clever: be big enough to smother all competitors, but as soon as Esports might grow, scare away your audience with PPVs that no one buys and Extended Series' that no one wants. The current MLG vs. Proleague invitational is a prime example of how to kill any form of hype. Only experienced saboteurs like MLG could have pulled this one off to such perfection. 10$ for 4.3x10³² games in the weirdest format of all time (BO2 cross matches into non-cross playoffs and the tournament winner getting 100% of the price money) was the perfect ratio of scaring away the majority, oversaturating the few who still got hyped and not making any money for themselves to grow.

They are not overly powerful due to their self-restriction to keep Esports (and thus themselves) as small as possible in North America. But nonetheless their relentlessness and consistency in killing Esports gives them a...

7/10


ESF
goals: revenge on Kespa, not become like Kespa
method: becoming like Kespa

The Esports Federation (ESF) is convinced that the only way to not end up like Kespa is to be a united front of teams. And if someone disagrees (s)he gets forced back into the line. By any means, even Kespa means. If that is no convincing logic then I have never heard of it.

They do not have a long history of evil like Kespa or Blizzard but they are certainly on the rise. The current feud with Kespa and the Slayers drama might only be the start of a new big player in the world of villains. So far they don't score that many points but the trend is clearly upwards and others would have to work a whole life for the same amount of carnage the ESF has achieved in a few weeks.

5.5/10

The Community
goal: killing Esports
method: complaining that Esports gets killed

The community called "The Community" is the mastermind behind all of this. It is a loose secret network of spectators and players and of all they are the most determind to kill Esports. None of the other organizations could get away with their bullshit if it wasn't for "The Community" feeding them money. They are the financial support behind the death of Esports and as such solely responsible for it.
Their most fearsome tactic however is the organized complaining: balance whine until your ears fall off, shitstorms of incredible stupidity on Reddit and emails to the sponsors over trivia, rumors and private drama. These are of course all distraction tactics to prevent the real problems from being solved but so far the community has not seen through the dirty antics of "The Community".

Powerful, rich, destructive, lurking in the shadows, pulling the strings but yet inscrutable. "The Community" is a parade example of an evil organization and anything less than the maximum score would be a shame.

10/10