• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 14:14
CEST 20:14
KST 03:14
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
ByuL, and the Limitations of Standard Play1Team Liquid Map Contest #22: Results and Winners7Code S Season 2 (2026): RO4 and Finals Preview12TL.net Map Contest #22 - Voting & Ladder Map Selection7Code S Season 2 (2026) - RO8 Preview8
Community News
[TLMC] Summer 2026 Ladder Map Rotation05.0.16 patch for SC2 goes live (8 worker start)83ZeroSpace at Steam NextFest - Last free demo39Weekly Cups (June 8-14): Clem and Solar double, PTR tested0RSL: S6 Finals played at BlizzCon 202611
StarCraft 2
General
Is the larve respawn broken? The Death of Cheese: From a Professional Cheeser 5.0.16 patch for SC2 goes live (8 worker start) Old Replays From 1.4.6 The future of the SC game model
Tourneys
Maestros of The Game 2 announcement and schedule ! Douyu Cup 2026: $20,000 Legends Event (June 26-28) RSL Revival: Season 6 - Qualifiers and Main Event INu's Battles#17 <BO.9> Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament
Strategy
[G] Having the right mentality to improve
Custom Maps
New Map Maker - Looking for Advice - Love or Hate Work In Progress Melee Maps [D]RTS in all its shapes and glory <3
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 532 Nuclear Family Mutation # 531 Experimental Artillery Mutation # 530 One For All
Brood War
General
ASL 22 Proposed Map Pool Best thing happen to StarCraft since Remastered? ProGamer Paychecks Story Data needed BW General Discussion
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [ASL21] Grand Finals The Casual Games of the Week Thread [BSL22] GosuLeague Casts - Tue & Thu 22:00 CEST
Strategy
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Creating a full chart of Zerg builds Relatively freeroll strategies Why doesn't anyone use restoration?
Other Games
General Games
ZeroSpace at Steam NextFest - Last free demo Path of Exile Nintendo Switch Thread Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Beyond All Reason
Dota 2
Looking for a Dota Mentor Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread Vanilla Mini Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Canadian Politics Mega-thread The Games Industry And ATVI Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine
Fan Clubs
The HerO Fan Club! The herO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! Series you have seen recently... [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books [TV/BOOK] *SPOILERS* Game of Thrones Discussion
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion McBoner: A hockey love story TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 Cricket [SPORT]
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Listen To The Coaches!
TrAiDoS
An Exploration of th…
waywardstrategy
I'm an arrogant trash talke…
FlaShFTW
Gauntlet SC2: A Retrospectiv…
Ctone23
ramps on octagon
StaticNine
StarCraft improvement
iopq
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 5412 users

Funny Quotes

Forum Index > Articles
Post a Reply
1 2 3 4 5 Next All
Pacifist
Profile Joined October 2003
Israel1683 Posts
December 15 2003 18:38 GMT
#1
anyone know any?
Riding a bike is overrated.
DeoDoubleG
Profile Joined January 2003
Philippines349 Posts
December 15 2003 19:21 GMT
#2
excellent smithers
z7-RaiN
Profile Joined January 2003
United States522 Posts
December 15 2003 19:22 GMT
#3
family guy:

paraody of NYPD Blue:

Sipowitz: are you gonna tell me who did it? or do i have to show you my ass!

guy being interrogated: I don't know who did it.

*sipowitz pulls down his pants and moons the guy

guy being interrogated: OK!!! I'LL TELL YOU!!
PokerStars.com, where dreams come true
DeoDoubleG
Profile Joined January 2003
Philippines349 Posts
December 15 2003 19:25 GMT
#4
heres another family guy:

how many apes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

three; one to screw in the lightbult, and two to throw feces at each other.
chobopeon
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
United States7342 Posts
December 15 2003 19:38 GMT
#5
I dunno, I died when I saw this .. I was blazed, but still. (and it was just on again)

Kyle's cousin moved to South Park, and he's the stereotypical jew. So Kyle pays Cartman 40 bucks to not make fun of him.

All class his cousin is being retarded, and Cartman is shaking holding back.

Finally, his cousin is talking a lot in class. The teacher says "In my class you have to focus, so please stop talking." He says "Sorry, sometimes I have troubles concentrating."

"Maybe we should send him to a concentration camp.. OH SON OF BITCH!"



:O
sux2bme
Profile Joined August 2003
Canada390 Posts
December 15 2003 19:39 GMT
#6
This is not a quote, but it's funny...

How many Teamliquid.net forumers does it take to to screw in a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been
changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light
bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term
is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to email the moderators complaining that they are in violation of
their "acceptable use policy"

109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please
take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where
to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for
this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they
cannot handle the light bulb controversy

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting
questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again
aBnarf
Profile Joined October 2002
Bangladesh314 Posts
December 15 2003 19:43 GMT
#7
friends dont let other friends play bgh
F10 P E S Q! lol
Orlandu
Profile Blog Joined January 2003
China2450 Posts
December 15 2003 19:46 GMT
#8
On December 16 2003 04:39 sux2bme wrote:
This is not a quote, but it's funny...

How many Teamliquid.net forumers does it take to to screw in a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been
changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light
bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term
is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to email the moderators complaining that they are in violation of
their "acceptable use policy"

109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please
take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where
to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for
this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they
cannot handle the light bulb controversy

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting
questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again


Ha ha I thought was pretty good, cause it's so damn true. Cept, I guarantee you there'd be some kind of American bashing somewhere in there too for some irrelevant reason.
We cant give up just because things arent the way we want them to be.
poland
Profile Joined February 2003
Poland956 Posts
December 15 2003 19:47 GMT
#9
On December 16 2003 04:38 choboPEon wrote:
I dunno, I died when I saw this .. I was blazed, but still. (and it was just on again)

Kyle's cousin moved to South Park, and he's the stereotypical jew. So Kyle pays Cartman 40 bucks to not make fun of him.

All class his cousin is being retarded, and Cartman is shaking holding back.

Finally, his cousin is talking a lot in class. The teacher says "In my class you have to focus, so please stop talking." He says "Sorry, sometimes I have troubles concentrating."

"Maybe we should send him to a concentration camp.. OH SON OF BITCH!"




omg that is sooooo goood!!!
i dont believe in mimes... do u?
chobopeon
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
United States7342 Posts
December 15 2003 19:48 GMT
#10
On December 16 2003 04:46 Orlandu wrote:


Ha ha I thought was pretty good, cause it's so damn true. Cept, I guarantee you there'd be some kind of American bashing somewhere in there too for some irrelevant reason.


Yeah, tbh, I was looking for that.
:O
ChildOfBodom
Profile Joined November 2003
Belgium90 Posts
December 15 2003 22:22 GMT
#11
--- Nuked ---
Fuck you and your killing lies. I hate your pissing attitude. Why did you have to go so low?
Ao_Jun
Profile Blog Joined July 2003
Denmark396 Posts
December 16 2003 05:49 GMT
#12
We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare - Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.

- Robert Wilensky
you are one of the least benigtedly unintelligent organic life forms it has been my profound lack of pleasure not to be able to avoid meeting.
iD.Twisted
Profile Joined September 2002
Netherlands3102 Posts
December 16 2003 05:51 GMT
#13
Not another one of these
All you have to decide, is what to do with the time that is given to you
Liquid`Drone
Profile Joined September 2002
Norway28825 Posts
December 16 2003 06:22 GMT
#14
ya chobopeon that one was so good my god

cartman is pretty much the entire reason why I watch southpark
Moderator
SweeTLemonS[TPR]
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
11739 Posts
December 16 2003 06:37 GMT
#15
On December 16 2003 15:22 Liquid`Drone wrote:
ya chobopeon that one was so good my god

cartman is pretty much the entire reason why I watch southpark


Isn't he the reason everyone watches South Park?

If you've seen Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back you might remember this one, and why it's funny: "I don't know what the fuck you just said little kid... but you special, you touched me right here" (Places his fist to his heart).- Tracy Morgan
I'm never gonna know you now \ But I'm gonna love you anyhow.
iD.Twisted
Profile Joined September 2002
Netherlands3102 Posts
December 16 2003 07:18 GMT
#16
Terrance and Phillip are also pwetty good ~_~
All you have to decide, is what to do with the time that is given to you
Telemako
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Spain1636 Posts
December 16 2003 07:32 GMT
#17
How many DragonBall Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
1, but it will last 30 episodes
I've been around since it all started, and it feels good
Hot_Bid
Profile Blog Joined October 2003
Braavos36401 Posts
December 16 2003 07:44 GMT
#18
15 to post how changing the lightbulb quicker does not necessarily mean changing it better, as useless unscrewing motions were probably used
@Hot_Bid on Twitter - ESPORTS life since 2010 - http://i.imgur.com/U2psw.png
bigMommA
Profile Joined March 2003
1985 Posts
December 16 2003 07:49 GMT
#19
On December 16 2003 15:22 Liquid`Drone wrote:
ya chobopeon that one was so good my god

cartman is pretty much the entire reason why I watch southpark


butters also my fav char now
lastas
Profile Joined May 2003
Sweden1219 Posts
December 16 2003 07:53 GMT
#20
On December 16 2003 04:39 sux2bme wrote:
This is not a quote, but it's funny...

How many Teamliquid.net forumers does it take to to screw in a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been
changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light
bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term
is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to email the moderators complaining that they are in violation of
their "acceptable use policy"

109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please
take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where
to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for
this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they
cannot handle the light bulb controversy

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting
questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again


made me lol
gg
1 2 3 4 5 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
RotterdaM Event
16:30
Rotti and Rexy Monday
RotterdaM865
SteadfastSC126
Railgan61
ZombieGrub27
Liquipedia
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
RotterdaM 865
mouzHeroMarine 402
elazer 159
SteadfastSC 126
RushiSC 96
BRAT_OK 90
Railgan 61
mouzStarbuck 47
gerald23 28
ZombieGrub27
MindelVK 22
EmSc Tv 13
StarCraft: Brood War
Calm 2989
Mini 414
Hyuk 179
BeSt 140
ggaemo 107
Soulkey 100
Aegong 42
scan(afreeca) 37
Hyun 35
IntoTheRainbow 20
[ Show more ]
Bale 10
yabsab 9
Dota 2
420jenkins323
Fuzer 304
Counter-Strike
fl0m1621
pashabiceps1283
x6flipin539
zeus286
edward111
Heroes of the Storm
Liquid`Hasu262
Other Games
singsing3191
Grubby2942
FrodaN1228
B2W.Neo776
Beastyqt599
Sick197
ArmadaUGS123
Trikslyr46
UpATreeSC45
Mew2King43
JuggernautJason32
Organizations
StarCraft 2
TaKeTV 545
Dota 2
PGL Dota 2 - Main Stream505
StarCraft 2
EmSc Tv 13
EmSc2Tv 13
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
[ Show 15 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• mYiSmile118
• intothetv
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• 80smullet 23
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Nemesis3057
Other Games
• imaqtpie592
• Shiphtur369
Upcoming Events
RSL Revival
15h 46m
RSL Revival
22h 46m
Bombastic Starleague
1d 1h
PiGosaur Cup
1d 5h
Kung Fu Cup
1d 16h
Replay Cast
2 days
CrankTV Team League
2 days
Bombastic Starleague
3 days
The PondCast
3 days
HomeStory Cup
3 days
[ Show More ]
Replay Cast
4 days
HomeStory Cup
4 days
Replay Cast
5 days
HomeStory Cup
5 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

BSL 22 Non-Korean Championship
Douyu Cup 2026
Murky Cup 2026

Ongoing

IPSL Spring 2026
Acropolis #4
CSCL: Masked Kings S4
YSL S3
CSL Season 21: Qualifier 2
SCTL 2026 Spring
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
IEM Rio 2026

Upcoming

CSL 2026 Summer (S21)
ASL Season 22:Wild Card Qualifier
CSLAN 4
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
RSL Revival: Season 6
CranK Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League
HSC XXIX
BCC 2026
Light Tournament 2026
Eternal Conflict S2 Finale
Eternal Conflict S2 E1
Heroes Pulsing #3
FISSURE Playground #5
BLAST Open Fall 2026
Esports World Cup 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer Qual
Stake Ranked Episode 3
XSE Pro League 2026
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.