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For the past couple days, I have been developing a very obnoxious body shaking cough. I went to sleep early last night and spent most of the day taking care to my body with bedrest. I canceled my work for the day and have put a halt to all my homework until the weekend or whenever I feel better. I had a test today that I couldn't miss though so I dragged myself out of bed to go to that. On my way there, I saw her. This girl.
I don't know what to think really...she dominates my thoughts. I can't go through the day without thinking of her. It doesn't make my day painful or excruciating to go through and I still go about with my busy life, but more often than not my thoughts always end up back to her. Whenever we talk though she also adds into the conversation as well and she doesn't seem to mind the complete awkwardness of what I say and is more glad that I am saying SOMETHING to her than NOTHING at all. I try to do things to avoid thinking about her, but she always resurfaces in my mind. I don't understand it I simply can't get rid of the thought of her.
She is the ONLY girl that I have gotten flustered trying to talk to and I used to get so nervous whenever I saw her. My heart rate would take a sharp increase and I would instantly lose any form of thought except that I would basically freeze in place with a blank mind.
anyways...so I saw her today and we walked to our classes together for a little bit. I just asked how her break was, what she did on black Friday, and she asked me the same and during the brief moment that we talked, my nervousness melted away into a mind numbing euphoria as nothing mattered in those couple minutes but me and her and what we were talking about. Soon enough though I reached my class so I had to say good bye to her.
I want to get to know her more and spend more time with her. She enjoys my presence too whenever I do talk to her so suffice to say there is a mutual level of attraction here, but THAT's why it is very nerve wracking, that a girl that I am physically and mentally attracted to likes me back and so I don't want to fuck this up. She is similar to me though in a lot of ways including being shy. We both don't have a lot of experience so that means it falls to me to make something happen.
I have straight up asked her out before and she ended up responding with "I'm seeing someone already" but that was complete bullshit and really she was just nervous and that was the first thing that she could think of saying.
Even though I f**cked up once, amazingly enough I have this 2nd opportunity to try again though. I want to get to know her more because this is someone that I would consider a long term relationship with, hence the getting to know her more to see if it would work out between us, but I don't know how to show that sincerely because well, I have never really said that to anyone before
/end blog
 
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Aw man, a crush!
What were the signs that made you think she is interested? Generally "I'm seeing someone" isn't great news.
Either way, good luck!
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Are you sure she isn't seeing anyone?
As much as that might be a generic rejection, you might be overlooking something.
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On November 29 2012 12:54 WarSame wrote:Aw man, a crush!What were the signs that made you think she is interested? Generally "I'm seeing someone" isn't great news. Either way, good luck!
On November 29 2012 13:05 Cyber_Cheese wrote:
Are you sure she isn't seeing anyone?
As much as that might be a generic rejection, you might be overlooking something.
I am going to shoot myself right now. She is seeing someone and wasn't lying. I also owe a friend 100$. what the fuck just happened.........
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On the plus side, at least it will be a lot easier to talk to her now that you know you have no chance. Get some good experience talking to pretty ladies with no pressure!
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On November 29 2012 13:47 WarSame wrote:
On the plus side, at least it will be a lot easier to talk to her now that you know you have no chance. Get some good experience talking to pretty ladies with no pressure!
On the plus side....no chance...
....
I have a lot of female friends. They all have boyfriends. Here is where I get off. I know I am such a better person then some other people. More specifically that girls is a dick. I also know I am smarter and better than him and its her loss that shes with him. When they break up, who is going to be here still more awesome than ever? Me. I am still going to be her friend and find out more about who she is. When they break up if she wants to be treated better, than she will know where to find me and give me a signal of some sort.
Its not the talking to pretty ladies that is hard. Its finding someone with a personality and being pretty that is the struggle, the never ending search because I know the person who ends up with me will be lucky to be with me and not the other way around
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On November 29 2012 14:23 StateofReverie wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2012 13:47 WarSame wrote:
On the plus side, at least it will be a lot easier to talk to her now that you know you have no chance. Get some good experience talking to pretty ladies with no pressure! On the plus side....no chance... .... I have a lot of female friends. They all have boyfriends. Here is where I get off. I know I am such a better person then some other people. More specifically that girls is a dick. I also know I am smarter and better than him and its her loss that shes with him. When they break up, who is going to be here still more awesome than ever? Me. I am still going to be her friend and find out more about who she is. When they break up if she wants to be treated better, than she will know where to find me and give me a signal of some sort. Its not the talking to pretty ladies that is hard. Its finding someone with a personality and being pretty that is the struggle, the never ending search because I know the person who ends up with me will be lucky to be with me and not the other way around
This post's immaturity level skyrockets even for SoA thread. So you think you're better than some of the guys (I doubt it but anything is possible) and thats why these girls should "wake up" and see you could be a much better partner? People like people for various reasons. Your approach of creep intention-befriending is only going to get you heavily friend-zoned. Im really surprised she's not creeped out by you.
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It's a lonely existence when you feel you're better than everyone else.
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On November 29 2012 14:23 StateofReverie wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2012 13:47 WarSame wrote:
On the plus side, at least it will be a lot easier to talk to her now that you know you have no chance. Get some good experience talking to pretty ladies with no pressure! On the plus side....no chance... .... I have a lot of female friends. They all have boyfriends. Here is where I get off. I know I am such a better person then some other people. More specifically that girls is a dick. I also know I am smarter and better than him and its her loss that shes with him. When they break up, who is going to be here still more awesome than ever? Me. I am still going to be her friend and find out more about who she is. When they break up if she wants to be treated better, than she will know where to find me and give me a signal of some sort. Its not the talking to pretty ladies that is hard. Its finding someone with a personality and being pretty that is the struggle, the never ending search because I know the person who ends up with me will be lucky to be with me and not the other way around
"Do you feel like wherever you go, you smell rotten cabbage? Maybe it's just you."
Honestly, give yourself a damn good slap to the face, and wake up. It doesn't matter if you think you are better than these other guys, you don't make the call. You need to get over yourself.
I understand very well that you are relatively young, and probably everyone of us has to get his ego checked at some point during their life. Some harder than others. If you want to improve and develop as a person, stop thinking 'I am better than that guy in XYZ", think of ways how you can be a stronger version of yourself, aspects in life you can improve on. If you think the other guy is 100% at fault, you are wrong. You are at least 10% at fault. Now focus on that 10%.
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It's interesting that you think of her often. I read in a guy named "p4ndemiks" blog something i like..It said something like "we humans are looking for a utopia in the desert of reality."
I know what it is like to have something that dominates your thoughts. It's what keeps some people going. It is one's dreams and his love for said dreams.
You asked what happened. Meaning how were you so wrong about her feelings? I think the cause was your hopeful romantic thoughts were dominating your realistic thoughts. You searched for the sign that she reciprocated so that you could maintain your hope. This, however, created a distance between you and reality. Intead of realizing that just because she "enjoys [your] presence, too, whenever you do talk to her" does not mean there is"mutual level of attraction here," you continued to think she felt the same. Do not under estimate how differently an attractive female can regard dating/mating.
Anyways, I have been reading the road maps of romance and finding myself in heart break city for some years now(hehe excuse my cheesey cliche'd style). I've learned about myself the hard way. Just remember to have a glass of reality for every romance cocktail you drink and you should find yourself closer to how things really are.
Recently I thought this one girl might be into me. I knew she liked toned muscles, good posture, manliness, reckless wildness, things i might posess the opposites of. All she had to do was flirt a bit and it was enough for me to turn myself into a lover. It was fucking stupid of me but also genius. You see, now i kickstarted myself into a more determined emotional state.. but I'm also sad and lonely.
I'm going to start giving myself an hour glass for TL responses. I think this took me over twenty minutes. Good lUck Soar!! I hope your lungs arent' too sore 
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I finally was able to get some sleep and.....nothing has changed except now I keep thinking about her. Still....like where I stand with her then because I am so confused right now
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I obsessed quite a bit over two girls my freshman year before dating someone else. It's not good for you. You should loosen up and bury that rage/longing into something productive, like finding a high-paying job or building a startup.
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On November 29 2012 23:15 StateofReverie wrote:
I finally was able to get some sleep and.....nothing has changed except now I keep thinking about her. Still....like where I stand with her then because I am so confused right now
She's not into you and your lil heart has a paper cut booboo 
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On November 29 2012 14:23 StateofReverie wrote:Show nested quote +On November 29 2012 13:47 WarSame wrote:
On the plus side, at least it will be a lot easier to talk to her now that you know you have no chance. Get some good experience talking to pretty ladies with no pressure! On the plus side....no chance... .... I have a lot of female friends. They all have boyfriends. Here is where I get off. I know I am such a better person then some other people. More specifically that girls is a dick. I also know I am smarter and better than him and its her loss that shes with him. When they break up, who is going to be here still more awesome than ever? Me. I am still going to be her friend and find out more about who she is. When they break up if she wants to be treated better, than she will know where to find me and give me a signal of some sort. Its not the talking to pretty ladies that is hard. Its finding someone with a personality and being pretty that is the struggle, the never ending search because I know the person who ends up with me will be lucky to be with me and not the other way around
Sorry, you're probably not. All you do is talk about people as if you somehow deserve them and that you're superior to them in some way. You speak of everybody as if they owe you something. Jesus. Finding "someone with a personality" and "pretty"? The person who ends up with you will be lucky? What the fuck is wrong with you?
You can talk all you want about wanting to come off as a better person, and I'm telling you that you've come back worse. You think that just because you accept your flaws and downfalls all your shit becomes justified in our eyes. Wrong.
Your illness is that you're horribly deluded.
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My first step here is that I have to get rid of this fucking cold. I have missed my classes for the past 2 days so that I can rest up. I realize now skipping classes is only for serious things like this.....not because its a fucking nice day outside.
And then...I have, or well had, this friend up until last night. He mooches off of me so much and I am so good tochim, I asked him one thing. ONE. Get me some hot fucking water. And its fucking free too so hes not even fucking paying any of his fucking money for it. He doesnt get it. I almost flip a shit and accidentally knock over a glass piece. There goes 120$ hahahaahaha.
The funniest part about all of this is that my dad gave me a hundred bucks and said use it wisely. Having squandered all the other money he gave me, I was deciding to save it. Looks like I saved it for the right reason! Yaaaaa for timing fucked up thibgs to fuck you up at the same time.
The BEST art is that th next day my "friend" acts like nothing even happened. I am waiting until I can say in a polite way to fuck off or else I would probably punch him in his face, tell him to look in a fucking mirror, and say thats what a fucking asshole looks like.
When I am in this kind of anger I know all i want to do is fuck something up.
Now with my sickness and literally wasting months of my life because I was in denial of the truth...and we have half a year of me also wasting my parents fucking money just so i can go through this piece of shit american education system to appearently become a better fucking person.
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I'm pretty sure we got enough votes in your other blogs for you to post pictures of yourself and wardrobe.
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On November 30 2012 02:50 RAGEMOAR The Pope wrote:
I'm pretty sure we got enough votes in your other blogs for you to post pictures of yourself and wardrobe.
yeah post it instead of rambling on about some girl who clearly doesnt like you
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He already did post them. They are in that blog.
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EPT
