EPTFlash Fanboys:
They like this guy because he's the best. Some of them will be terrans on iccup, looking up to his godly play. Many more will just be blind bandwagoners, enjoying following whoever is dominating at the moment. These are pretty dumb reasons to like a player, and I personally see no good ones to like this guy.
Redeeming features: They are mostly chill. They simply like him because he's the best, which means less delusions. Plenty of excuses when he loses of course, but that's true of every fanboy of any player.
How to troll them: Call his play boring. Patently untrue (except when he goes mech TvZ, and I don't say this as a TvZ mech-hater, Flash is especially good at making that boring), but guaranteed to work.
Jaedong Fanboys:
They seem to be a bit of a dying breed these days. I think it's because JD sucks now ^.~ JD still does post the best results of all the zergs, though, so all the people who actually play zerg on iccup still follow him around of course. And then there's his "aggression". This is the biggest joke anyone ever heard, JD is one of the most turtling zergs there is these days. You wanna go watch an aggressive zerg, watch some Shine games... oh wait everybody hates him because they don't like aggression at all. It's still the #1 reason people will claim to like this guy, though.
Redeeming features: Zerg's a cool race, I guess. The group most likely to get in fights with other fanboys.
How to troll them: Not necessary. Nothing you say will be able to make them froth at the mouth any more than they already do. By the same token, nothing you say will be able to make them stop frothing at the mouth either.
Bisu Fanboys:
There are several categories of Bisu fanboy. None of them have redeeming features, though I must admit well played PvZ is fuckin' sexy.
Type 1 is the "protoss on iccup" group. Well, they probably don't play iccup any more, but they used to, coincidentally when Bisu was at his peak. Now firmly attached to Bisu's hull, they watch his every game and practise making excuses for his generally lacklustre play.
Type 2 is the "OMG he beat Savior" group. While I must agree rallying against Savior fanboys is a most noble pursuit (see below), these Bisu fanboys are even more delusional than the previous type. Clinging firmly to the past, their every comment will be about bisu not being in a slump, or him being "back".
Type 3 is the "he wins games for the team that had Boxer on it". Well, I already talked about living in the past, but this is just lame. I guess it is a more global view of starcraft if you follow the most successful *team* instead of the most successful *player(s)*, but it's still lame.
Redeeming features: None. I know I said JD fanboys are rapid loonies, but by that I really just mean they have a whole lot of misplaced passion. Bisu fanboys go beyond passion. If Bisu dies to cheese (dare I mention the S word again?), people get BANNED. Neverind the fact he opens all of his PvP's with DTs and half his PvT's with proxies.
How to troll them: Bisu's slumping. Remind them of it. Actual results doesn't matter, though best results will be obtained if you wait for Bisu to lose a game. Mention PvT, because Bisu sucks at that. He can't use arbiters or carriers, nor can he spam ground units as good as Best.
Stork Fanboys:
Once upon a time, these guys were really chill. Now, Stork is doing well again. These are dark times for people wearing the KHAN icon, previously a little blue signifier of "this person actually likes Starcraft and not good-player-dicksucking" (see also: Woongjin or FOX icons). But there is turbulence in the BW scene, and being a Stork fan myself, I don't dare comment. We can only observe, perhaps watching as we become the new villains of TL. Dark times indeed.
Redeeming features: Some of them are from the era when it was cool to like Stork. They used to have a reputation of respecting other top players (excepting those who like Stork as #2 protoss and are secretly Bisu fanboys, a surprisingly large group!).
How to troll them: Shoot down their shuttles. You might try to irritate them by mentioning WoW, or cellphone games, or even silver medals and the "kong line". These are badges of honour for true Stork fanboys, and you will achieve nothing with such cheap shots.
Saviour Fanboys:
A plague upon TL. Saviour always looked like a douche, and turned out to be a douche. He had a reign of dominance, it was quite impressive I guess. So not only do the fans of this guy fall into the "blindly follow the winner" category, but they are wayyyy behind. They're like your dad's friend who tells you that no good music has been released since 1972 or some bullshit. And if a zerg ever plays a macro game well, then they're "almost Savioresque". Nevermind the fact that Savior had basically 0 APM and would lose to Juni or PerfectMan if they played today. OH WAIT THEY CAN'T BECAUSE SAVIOR IS A DIRTY CHEATER AND IS DISGRACED. Thank God.
Fun Fact: These guys love to claim that Savior is the reason the word bonjwa came into existence, which is entirely wrong.
Fun Fact #2: This guy earned a whole bunch of extra fame when he announced he would "destroy everyone in 2009". This was because he's "one of those funny Asian guys" and yet he spoke English. I assure you, it was quite amazing.
Redeeming features: They won't get you kicked off a progaming team, unlike the actual Savior.
How to troll them: Suggest there was no match fixing, that Savior only set it up... or better yet, he was framed. Going on about the scandal is the low-hanging fruit, but you'll have way more fun if you just suggest every game he lost was because he's actually that bad.
Fantasy Fanboys:
These guys are typically just T1 fans who like the best Terran on the team by default. Fair enough, really. This guy is overrated as shit, though. He's famous for failing, something which he gladly shows off frequently. But he wins a whole bunch of games too, somehow. He brought Valkyries into TvZ, so I mean he has some good points, but for some reason everyone pretends he can actually play TvP. Well sure, if you count "throw a million vultures at opponent, hope to kill enough probes to make up for your inability to play any other component of this matchup".
Redeeming features: Even his fans will laugh when he plays games against Calm, so good on them. Also he did a battlecruiser dance, that alone should earn him a few genuine fans.
How to troll them: Say things like DAT HARASS in LR threads while he rams vultures into pylon walls or dragoon clumps. (Don't actually do this I got a warning from TL Bot for doing this).
Effort Fanboys:
He was on the same team as Savior. That's the only reason anybody liked this guy. He retired and I'm not going to spend any more time on him.
Redeeming features: At least they moved on from Savior.
How to troll them: You can't, Effort fanboys don't exist anymore. Nobody misses the guy, because people only liked him for his results, and he isn't getting any of those if he isn't playing SC.
Hydra Fanboys:
What fans? This guy is playing interesting, varied Starcraft and nobody has caught on yet because groupthink hasn't caught up. For every one who actually watches starcraft and respects this guy, there are 3 more that will say "lol who the fuck is Hydra, and how did X lose to him?!". Depressing.
Redeeming features: No fans means no features to tarnish or redeem them.
How to troll them: Say "lol who the fuck is Hydra, and how did X lose to him?!".
Zero Fanboys:
These people are child molestors. Do not communicate with them, edit any posts where you respond to someone exclaiming any respect for the guys play, or worse, his physical appearance. Failure to do so and the police will be at the very least requisitioning your computer.
Redeeming features: He plays entertaining games. If the word "cute" has ever popped into your head, though, it's already too late.
How to troll them: Remind them that there's no such thing as an "ephebophile" as far as the law is concerned.
Baby Fanboys:
They respect actual starcraft. Baby plays amazing starcraft, and they can see that. They are cool people.
Redeeming features: None, because they don't need any.
How to troll them: Suggest Baby got out-multitasked in a game. Pick any game. Maybe say DAT HARASS at some point, too.
Shine Fanboys:
They appreciate aggression. True aggression. Either that or they just enjoy antagonising Bisu fanboys. Both are fine pursuits!
Redeeming features: When you play them on iccup if you 1base you will win.
How to troll them: Accuse Shine of turtling.
Bogus Fanboys:
I am the one true Bogus fanboy. Random people who follow STX also like him. He might as well be another Hydra, otherwise. Go check out just how high he is on the ELO rank, you might be surprised!
Redeeming features: Incredible fashion sense, a cool hairstyle and a great personality. They make hilarious blog posts.
How to troll them: I'm not telling!
Sea Fanboys:
They like him because he speaks a bit of English and he posted on TL a few times. This pretty much makes them jingocentric rednecks, basically. 95% of them are surely American.
Redeeming features: Even I gotta admit, a progamer posting on TL is pretty darn cool. Not going to hold back my comments here, though!
How to troll them: I don't know. This guy's actual gameplay is just so mediocre, not good, not bad, I don't know what to say.
Jaehoon Fanboys:
They are the opposite of the "follow the latest winner" type that make up 90% of fanboys, and that makes them awesome by default. Anyone being a fan of the guy who created that FBH vs Jaehoon game is alright in my book.
Redeeming features: Will never get enough of a chance to brag to become annoying.
How to troll them: Call him mediocre. This guy is spectacular, whether he's in fail mode or trash-taking mode. Suggest he's nothing special.
Firebathero Fanboys:
All the cool people who wanted to rally against Savior ended up here, by the way, not with Bisu. If you fail to love the guy who made a name for himself solely via ceremonies, you are probably an unfeeling robot. He's gone to ACE and mellowed out, and turned himself into a dude who sometimes wins some games but is nothing special. I guess what I'm trying to say is he is the only person for whom it is acceptable to live in the past for.
Redeeming features: They respect FBH for the swagger they do not dare show in their own lives. They will thus generally be inoffensive in threads, so join in with the love!
How to troll them: Three characters. TvP. No, not because FBH sucks at it. In fact, precisely because these days, he doesn't.
IF A PLAYER IS NOT ON THIS LIST:
Then maybe I forgot them. Or I was too lazy/unable to think of anything I perceived as funny to say. If they had an era of dominance before Savior, I don't care about them, sorry. There were other players I'd love to talk about, but they are not players that have a lot of fanboys on TL, so I left them off.
Anyways peace!
