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Are You Kind When Miserable?

Blogs > yoshtodd
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yoshtodd
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States418 Posts
March 31 2009 05:12 GMT
#1
I've read in various places that it's easy to be kind when your surroundings are good. It takes truer character to treat people well when you feel bad. Just wondering how good other people are at this? I've had this lingering cold and a lot of stress from work and school. I find myself having really angry, sometimes cruel thoughts toward people who don't deserve it. I'm aware it's happening but I don't know what to do to stop it. Just makes me afraid that if someday I'm very seriously ill or stressed that I'm going to act like a monstrous, intolerable jerk. So what do you guys do when you're pained, stressed or pissed off?

***
moo
Jibba
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
United States22883 Posts
March 31 2009 05:15 GMT
#2
Yeah, I think I am. I'm extremely anti-passive aggressive usually, so I try not to spread my bad moods around. If I have those thoughts, that's all they are because I know the next day I won't feel that way. Ex-gf seems to be the only exception to that rule!
ModeratorNow I'm distant, dark in this anthrobeat
MiniRoman
Profile Blog Joined September 2003
Canada3953 Posts
March 31 2009 05:21 GMT
#3
Eh I always try to be helpful. I will try to give a person the same answer to a question regardless of my mood. Unless they are the one that made me angry then I will yell at them but I won't misdirect my anger to other people. Talking to other people about stuff gets me over any in the moment kinda emotion. I'm real lazy at brooding.
Nak Allstar.
Physician *
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States4146 Posts
March 31 2009 05:22 GMT
#4
On March 31 2009 14:12 yoshtodd wrote:
I've read in various places that it's easy to be kind when your surroundings are good.

u've read wrong, I mean really wrong..
"I have beheld the births of negative-suns and borne witness to the entropy of entire realities...."
iSCOUT4u
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
United States327 Posts
March 31 2009 05:23 GMT
#5
I'm the nicest person ull ever meet....faggot.
<3 R1CH <3 TL Just ordered a TL shirt and can't wait :)
Grobyc
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada18410 Posts
March 31 2009 05:39 GMT
#6
Nope, probably not so nice when I am miserable, but not to the point where I am violent or cussing people out or anything. I'll just give a plain face without smiling usually, and talk without emotion, but I still usually respond about the same.
If you watch Godzilla backwards it's about a benevolent lizard who helps rebuild a city and then moonwalks into the ocean.
koreasilver
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
9109 Posts
March 31 2009 05:39 GMT
#7
I'm miserable when I'm kind.
CapO
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
United States1615 Posts
March 31 2009 05:41 GMT
#8
i feel you, man. i haven't had any satisfaction of joy for awhile.. i don't know what to do. i'm probably depressed or something. it's common for many people. you're not alone, just keep that in mind. you're on the same boat as others. try to think positive as much as you can. it's hard though.
SNSD fan
MeriaDoKk
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
Chile1726 Posts
March 31 2009 05:52 GMT
#9
Damn, today was one of those days, just talk to a friend to calm me down a litle bit, I think that may help you.
And no, im not kind, i just don't smile to jokes, plain face, and I listen a lot of music.
Spike
Profile Joined October 2003
United States1392 Posts
March 31 2009 05:53 GMT
#10
On March 31 2009 14:22 Physician wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 31 2009 14:12 yoshtodd wrote:
I've read in various places that it's easy to be kind when your surroundings are good.

u've read wrong, I mean really wrong..

mind explaining?
seems intuitive to me that it's easier to be kind/a good person when things are good.
you know the old saying, the true measure of a man is how he acts in times of challenge - or something to that effect.

HeavOnEarth
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States7087 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-03-31 06:15:36
March 31 2009 06:11 GMT
#11
no but im extremely fun to be around when im miserable if that makes any sense
when im sad i do w/e the fuck i want (some sort of self destruction i guess)
whether it be my grades, my liver, etc.
and forget about w/e that it is that's bringing me down
it's how i cope.

So what do you guys do when you're pained, stressed or pissed off?

Well aside from obvious bad things to do, whenever you're feeling like your about to break
you should sleep
just take some sleeping pills to sleep if ur not sleepy

-warning everything ive just said is horrible advice-
"come korea next time... FXO house... 10 korean, 10 korean"
Railz
Profile Joined July 2008
United States1449 Posts
March 31 2009 06:33 GMT
#12
Depends. I'll be pretty a doormat for anyone unless they continue to ignore and add to my own miserable mood, in which case I pretty much rip them apart.

I believe it is easier to be kind around someone you like, ofc, but every person around me I have a preset tolerance level for my own mood.

If I really feel like I can't be nice, I'll just shut myself up; it seems mean to others as if I'm giving the cold shoulder, but I find it better then the alternative.
Did the whole world just get a lot smaller and go whooosh?_-` Number 0ne By.Fantasy Fanatic!
Physician *
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States4146 Posts
March 31 2009 06:34 GMT
#13
- people that have suffered or are suffering tend to have more empathy with others who are similar conditions, whether it be economic hardship, illness or emotional damage
- the very poor to give one example, give proportional more than any other group
"I have beheld the births of negative-suns and borne witness to the entropy of entire realities...."
TheosEx
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States894 Posts
March 31 2009 06:42 GMT
#14
On March 31 2009 15:34 Physician wrote:
- people that have suffered or are suffering tend to have more empathy with others who are similar conditions, whether it be economic hardship, illness or emotional damage
- the very poor to give one example, give proportional more than any other group


Not entirely true. There are way too many factors to consider for this to be even generalized.
yoshtodd
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States418 Posts
March 31 2009 06:42 GMT
#15
On March 31 2009 15:34 Physician wrote:
- people that have suffered or are suffering tend to have more empathy with others who are similar conditions, whether it be economic hardship, illness or emotional damage
- the very poor to give one example, give proportional more than any other group


Well both of those seem true. However it seems incorrect to me to conclude "The shittier you feel the better you treat others"? Or are you saying I shouldn't draw a correlation either way? For me personally I find when I'm feeling stressed and beaten down I'm a lot less patient and tolerant.
moo
fight_or_flight
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States3988 Posts
March 31 2009 06:54 GMT
#16
On March 31 2009 15:42 yoshtodd wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 31 2009 15:34 Physician wrote:
- people that have suffered or are suffering tend to have more empathy with others who are similar conditions, whether it be economic hardship, illness or emotional damage
- the very poor to give one example, give proportional more than any other group


Well both of those seem true. However it seems incorrect to me to conclude "The shittier you feel the better you treat others"? Or are you saying I shouldn't draw a correlation either way? For me personally I find when I'm feeling stressed and beaten down I'm a lot less patient and tolerant.

I think physician is talking about your surroundings dictation how you feel. Generally, when one speaks of surroundings, it is more of a long-term situation, such as being poor as he mentioned.

But you have to ask the question, are poor people really miserable most of the time? Probably not.

You are speaking of more of emotional up and downs which happen in cycles, and just being grouchy.
Do you really want chat rooms?
SonuvBob
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
Aiur21550 Posts
March 31 2009 07:03 GMT
#17
Hot_Bid made me miserable once. He paid... dearly.
Administrator
Urth
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
United States1256 Posts
March 31 2009 07:06 GMT
#18
I am not kind when miserable... just depressed, don't really care what is going on around, don't care what is said, don't care if others have problems, it's very bad =/
BY.HERO FIGHTING!!!!
yoshtodd
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
United States418 Posts
March 31 2009 07:11 GMT
#19
On March 31 2009 15:54 fight_or_flight wrote:
You are speaking of more of emotional up and downs which happen in cycles, and just being grouchy.


Okay now that we've clarified what we're talking about... do you feel the grouchiness is controllable? The "emotional ups and downs" I'm sure people will give the advice like it's combating depression: exercise, adequate sleep, medication etc. But when dealing with stuff like physical pains or external stressors I'm looking for ways to stop the ensuing irritability, because I feel even worse when I start treating people around me bad.
moo
geometryb
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
United States1249 Posts
March 31 2009 07:23 GMT
#20
i think everyone's like that. bad mood = not nice, otherwise you aren't in a bad mood.
The_Australian
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Australia458 Posts
March 31 2009 09:31 GMT
#21
i'm well mannered when in a bad mood and generally nicer.
"Nothing should be unstoppable when you see it coming...." - Boxer
Ecorin
Profile Joined August 2008
Estonia84 Posts
March 31 2009 11:03 GMT
#22
I'm pretty depressed, but in school I try to be nice. I mean, I've never told anyone to fuck off or any similar things. Even on the internet I avoid getting into arguing with someone completely idiotic, so I just leave things unsaid, even though I think it in my head. But, if you have an extremely deep depression, then you don't even care about anything and say bad things to anyone without even thinking.
Like I said before.we are going to own these guys,no problem.I could beat their entire team 1 on 8 with no monitor. -Tasteless translating
PH
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
United States6173 Posts
March 31 2009 11:10 GMT
#23
I try my best...but it's definitely harder when things aren't going your way.

I'm a cynical type guy that likes to complain even on a good day, though. On a bad day, I just tend to lose my inner monologue and shit just rolls out without a sugarcoat.

My friends have all gotten used to it, though...so no biggie. Around other people, I can deal.
Hello
Rekrul
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
Korea (South)17174 Posts
March 31 2009 11:23 GMT
#24
i'm always kind and never miserable
why so 진지해?
ReCharge
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Philippines505 Posts
March 31 2009 15:25 GMT
#25
There was one point, after getting a very bad day, that I almost choked my cousin to death.. thank God I didn't
David Kim for Bonjwa!
MoltkeWarding
Profile Joined November 2003
5195 Posts
March 31 2009 15:45 GMT
#26
Are You Kind When Miserable?


I'm afraid not.
Gray[FH
Profile Joined January 2009
152 Posts
April 01 2009 00:20 GMT
#27
On March 31 2009 16:03 SonuvBob wrote:
Hot_Bid made me miserable once. He paid... dearly.


hahaha
<3
Savio
Profile Joined April 2008
United States1850 Posts
April 01 2009 00:55 GMT
#28
True self mastery means you can control not only your actions but your thoughts and feelings aas well. Then you are truly powerful.

But I doubt any of us here has truly attained mastery of himself.

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery. – Winston Churchill
Licmyobelisk
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Philippines3682 Posts
April 01 2009 03:29 GMT
#29
On April 01 2009 09:55 Savio wrote:
True self mastery means you can control not only your actions but your thoughts and feelings aas well. Then you are truly powerful.

But I doubt any of us here has truly attained mastery of himself.




Is this like a Nirvana state of mind?

Me same as you guys, But when I'm in a bad mood all I need is beer and a little talk,
Also casual gaming helps besides Starcraft.
I don't think I've ever wished my opponent good luck prior to a game. When I play, I play to win. I hope every opponent I ever have is cursed with fucking terrible luck. I hope they're stuck playing underneath a stepladder with a black cat in attendance a
Malongo
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Chile3472 Posts
April 01 2009 07:13 GMT
#30
On April 01 2009 09:55 Savio wrote:
True self mastery means you can control not only your actions but your thoughts and feelings aas well. Then you are truly powerful.

But I doubt any of us here has truly attained mastery of himself.


Hey Savio that reminded me of G.I. Gurdjieff.
Help me! im still improving my English. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. M. G.
Physician *
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States4146 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-04-01 15:28:58
April 01 2009 15:01 GMT
#31
savio is starting to sound like physician lol u were the one in pre-med no?
"I have beheld the births of negative-suns and borne witness to the entropy of entire realities...."
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