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Depends on how good you are at reading people/how well you know her I guess.
I suspected my GF with cheating twice, and was right both times.
Things is you suspecting her means either that your relationship is going downhill, and thus you should probably end it or it simply means that you are insecure and thus you need to grow some confidence.
As for having separate lives/ seeing each other once or twice a week, different people want different things out of a relationship. If your GF want one where you guys don't see each other that much and you want to see her more or less every day you have to decide whether or not you want to do it her way, or break up with her.
Ehm as for staying together forever and stuff, I think it's cute.
Problem is though that most likely it will lead to nowhere and perhaps make it feel less important that one time you actually mean it.
BUT some people only have serious relationships with people they would consider possible life-partners and in that case why not?
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What you'll need to do is find yourself a new girl (as a lifeboat) and be completely prepared and ready to jump ship if things start to sink.
Her: "Yes that's right I started cheating on you because you're a pathetic, insecure loser".
You: "Hey, I don't care, I've already been cheating on you for months because you're a bitch".
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Ok, its going to cost you about $500, but if you care about your relationship you will do it.
First, you need to place this GPS tracker in her purse.
$269
http://www.brickhousesecurity.com/h0001.html
You will need to disguise it as something.
Second, you will need to sneak this camera pen on her person. The best way would probably be to buy her a new purse which you have modified to hold said pen, so that you are capturing video out of a small hole. Hopefully 32 hours of video is enough.
$200
http://www.brickhousesecurity.com/dvr-pen.html
come report back to us on what you find.
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On October 04 2008 03:21 Hawk wrote:
You're probably gonna make her go bone one of her 8th grade classmates just to make you feel like shit for even accusing her hahaha
god I hope so
that'll probably lead to the only scorpion blog worth reading
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oh and roughly 25% of all people cheat, just beat her up to be safe
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I've always been of the opinion that if you don't trust someone (like if you feel like you need to spy on them), the relationship is already over. I could go into details but... No one ever agrees with me lol.
(she was outside and was just looking at anthills and stuff)
LOL.... That would make sense if she were 10 years old but... As you've told TL so many times, you're dating a 17ish year old... I don't know if I'd believe it unless your gf was really weird. Although, that's only speaking from the perspective of someone who's never met her.
Either find a way to resolve your feelings (including talking to her), or break it off with her, because it's not fair to her that you won't trust her. I've talked to people who don't trust their bf/gf and it's just retarded listening to them complain all the time that they don't feel like they can trust the person, listing reason's why their activity is really suspicious, and I'm just thinking... Then fucking break up with them. If everything were fine you wouldn't have that sneaking suspicion. It's called gut instinct and it only shows up when your unconscious mind knows something is amiss, but the person is doing just enough to make you conscious mind think it 'could be' nothing.
If you can't make yourself vulnerable to someone, you have no business being a in a relationship with them. Of course there's always going to be the chance she could cheat on you and screw you over; That's never going to change. It's just whether you like her enough to trust her to have that power over you, the same way she trusts you with that power over her.
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On October 06 2008 09:03 travis wrote:
You smoke weed right?
Yes....
xD! Is this the problem?
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On October 06 2008 09:27 PsycHOTemplar wrote:I've always been of the opinion that if you don't trust someone (like if you feel like you need to spy on them), the relationship is already over. I could go into details but... No one ever agrees with me lol. LOL.... That would make sense if she were 10 years old but... As you've told TL so many times, you're dating a 17ish year old... I don't know if I'd believe it unless your gf was really weird. Although, that's only speaking from the perspective of someone who's never met her. Either find a way to resolve your feelings (including talking to her), or break it off with her, because it's not fair to her that you won't trust her. I've talked to people who don't trust their bf/gf and it's just retarded listening to them complain all the time that they don't feel like they can trust the person, listing reason's why their activity is really suspicious, and I'm just thinking... Then fucking break up with them. If everything were fine you wouldn't have that sneaking suspicion. It's called gut instinct and it only shows up when your unconscious mind knows something is amiss, but the person is doing just enough to make you conscious mind think it 'could be' nothing. If you can't make yourself vulnerable to someone, you have no business being a in a relationship with them. Of course there's always going to be the chance she could cheat on you and screw you over; That's never going to change. It's just whether you like her enough to trust her to have that power over you, the same way she trusts you with that power over her.
About the anthill thing, well, "looking at anthills and stuff" really was a metaphor for thinking about life I guess. I've already talked to her about it and it all worked out but that feeling just came back randomly. I guess I'm just a paranoid person at heart +.+
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Hmmmm
She is a hotty, iirc.
It's always hard to date a hotty, wherever you go, you get to see every man looking at her with envious eyes. And you have to constantly put them back into their spot, like show who's the man.
Well I was in this situation sometimes, and I think the best solution is not to worry.
How not to worry?
Building self-confidence. Sport, study, books, art, anything that you may like (not necessarily SC). Also, i noticed that when i was with them, i would act as if they were the only girl around, barely talking to waitress, other girls (not friends) or whatever.
This is wrong. Because I was doing that for her, for her to notice that she counts a lot in my eyes, but it had the side-effect of making her think I was not attractive or interesting or whatever. So now I just act normal, it raises up jealousy on both parts, which is, i believe, more sane that the opposite.
Just act normal, you can even flirt a bit, and try to have a good time. Then you will earn her respect, admiration, you will not care that much about losing her losing her losing her (OMG where is she), because you will enjoy yourself anyway.
And if it fits like that, then you may eventually consider mariage and stuff.
But don't get obsessed, even if you manage to marry her this way, you don't want to spend your life in fear. And if you fear, this will probably happen anyway, because she will get bored.
Self confidence and detachment my friend, let her breath.
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Don't try too hard... if it happens, it happens.
Seriously, don't try too hard...
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On October 08 2008 00:21 Yank31 wrote:
Hmmmm
She is a hotty, iirc.
Yes, a lot of people want to fuck her from what I've heard from my friends and their friends... x[!
Self confidence and detachment my friend, let her breath.
I'm stoned right now, but, when I'm stoned I read through posts better than just speed read through them (when I'm not stoned(maybe because everything is slower when I'm stoned...)) and not really think about what the other person posted. I mean, seriously,
Okay, I also tend to go off topic when I'm stoned, but, going back to my point, that is the best advice I've read, thanks.
Just... I laughed at the spelling error. A lot, also another thing I do when I'm stoned(is it really a spelling error? God I don't even know anymore, fuck the world!!)
EDIT:
Just act normal, you can even flirt a bit, and try to have a good time. Then you will earn her respect, admiration, you will not care that much about losing her losing her losing her (OMG where is she), because you will enjoy yourself anyway.
I have and always will act like this because that is how I am. I tend to have a good time anywhere and everywhere I go. When I got a girlfriend it was like "Alright baby, let's have a good time anywhere and everywhere we go together!!" Thing is, I tend to be the life of the party and she plays the role of "clingy girlfriend" and starts to get sad or throw little fits to try to get my attention when I get pulled into the crowd. She will, with her fits, get me to submit to her will and stop having fun with everyone just so that I can pay attention to her so I think she has negative thoughts about me too XP!
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United States17042 Posts
On October 06 2008 06:16 fight_or_flight wrote:Ok, its going to cost you about $500, but if you care about your relationship you will do it. First, you need to place this GPS tracker in her purse. $269 http://www.brickhousesecurity.com/h0001.htmlYou will need to disguise it as something. Second, you will need to sneak this camera pen on her person. The best way would probably be to buy her a new purse which you have modified to hold said pen, so that you are capturing video out of a small hole. Hopefully 32 hours of video is enough. $200 http://www.brickhousesecurity.com/dvr-pen.htmlcome report back to us on what you find.
This seems way way too creepy. Although it would undoubtedly answer any questions you might have about what she spends her time "alone" doing...
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On October 09 2008 13:54 Wasabi wrote:
To answer your question: chill down for a few days, and ask her to go out with you when you think you've collected yourself.
My two previous relationships have had these times before, and all of them were just out of reach for non-cheating reasons. Well, I did break up with them because 1) she wasn't admitted to the same university as I did, and got too busy with studying to bother with a relationship, and 2) it's pretty much the same as the first, I was just too busy studying even though I met her in the same uni (Berkeley). I'm still friends with both of them; my relationships with them didn't end bitterly.
Though it does sound to me that she is doing something you don't have to know/wouldn't want to know, it depends on how well you know her. You don't need anyone to tell you that you're doing the wrong thing. This is how relationships fall; by losing trust.
What else could she be doing? Did you get to know her completely from the four months you've been together? Four months of relationship is probably not enough to reveal everything you know about her, and why she would be acting so detached to you for some reason. It's fine for you to feel what you're feeling right now since no relationship is perfect. There are a lot of things a person could be doing that shouldn't upset and involve you; hopefully that isn't cheating on a relationship. Though, if it's really nothing you should worry about, she should have told you already, or is telling the truth anyway.
Oh yeah, after reading the title I thought the blog was about something else, lol. Financial infidelity, I thought.
I realize now, she doesn't do anything. I'm just paranoid... I've always been paranoid. I see cars move awkwardly on the road I'll think something is going on... I just need to take more roche pills XD!
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EPT
