Public Announcement

On February 24 2008 08:32 fanatacist wrote:
Hello TeamLiquid.net;

I've made a reputation for myself of being a general asshole on these forums, whether in jest or in earnest, on many occassions to many people. Sometimes it was warranted, many times it was not. That has been my cynical nature for years now, and as I was walking today I realized that whether it is ever deserved or not, my attitude towards others on an internet forum aimed at enjoying a great game and a strong competitive scene is unacceptable. Some names of rather intelligent people that I've wronged during my presence on these forums come up when I think of this, such as micronesia, thedeadhaji, MoltkeWarding, LordofAscension and the people behind the awesome PPs (Pimpest Plays), Deadvessel, XCetron, Incontrol, Raithed (despite all the help I've given you, I've been condescending much of the time), and recently Niji-z (this is of course ommitting many others, I'm sure). Whether my actions towards you were justified or not, whether they were serious or jokes, whether they've affected you or not, I feel that they are wrong either way and were definitely not part of the positive experience people come to this site for. Sure, people are used to dealing with trolls and assholes, but why does that create an excuse for me to be one of them? It's long past time for me to mature on these forums in a sense, as I am not generally this malicious in person and I tend to pride myself in my maturity and objectivity when "necessary." In review of my behavior, I realized that I've classified this website as usually not a place where this was "necessary," and therein lies my mistake. I don't wish to join the ranks of other trolls and idiots on this forum in the minds of some of the more respected posters, be they hypocrites or truly superior in manners, although in a sense it is too late. I don't want to be the next Carlodajin or the next lastshadow, those people are as unsavory in my view as they are in yours, but I see myself going down that path. For too long I've come on this forum trashed and baked and trash-talked others under my pathetic drugged-up stupor as a shield from guilt or shame.

I'm writing this as a blog mainly as a public apology to those I've wronged in any small or large quantity, and I'm sorry if I am not making much sense but there is no spell-check on this computer and I am foreign. I don't wish to make excuses for my actions any longer as I don't wish to make the aforementioned actions any longer either. So, to round things off, I'm sorry, and should I ever be a pretentious dick to any of you (which I hope I won't be), please link me to this entry and give me time to collect my thoughts, perhaps sober up, and apologize in due time. I'm also sorry to any moderators that I've troubled with my troll-like posts, because even though banning someone is relatively easy, it's not something you should have to deal with so consistently and constantly from a regular poster such as myself.

Thank you for reading this, and I apologize once again.