|
What We Think About Death May Not Be Entirely Correct, New Study Suggests
A gravestone with the word "rip" carved onto it. Credit to: Google Image Search
Real Journalist McJournalistFace
It is a cloudy, drizzling afternoon in the small rural town of Sacramento, California. The Henderson family gathers around a casket, adored in all black to mourn the passing of their beloved relative, known to the family as "Auntie Anne". As she lay, with a peaceful look of finality on her face, most likely the cosmetic work of coroners, there was a sense in the air of sadness.
Helen Henderson, the sister of the deceased, said through her emotional tears, "She's gone. I can't believe it, but she's dead. Why haven't they outlawed death yet? This is America. This isn't supposed to happen here."
Indeed. Death: It is the one eventuality in life that has been at the heart of some of the world's most hot-debated philosophical topics. Is there life after death? Is death "the end" of life? Is death truly inevitable? These are some of the biggest questions in the world today. It is considered by many leading scientists and experts to be the state at which life ends. But is it really?
A new study out of the University of Mogadishu, Somalia, conducted a survey on a pool of 69,420 participants ranging ages 18 - 80+ on their state of being and their beliefs on death, and what they found was startling: Not only did some of the participants respond to the survey saying that they believed they would never die, but a large number of survey-takers claimed to already be dead, suggesting that death is not the end.
Dr. David Houseman, a leading deathologist, spoke with us about the results of the survey. "It's very compelling", he stated, adding, "What we're seeing is a 100% increase in the last year alone in the number of people who are dead who can respond to surveys. That's double the number from last year. These numbers are incredible, and should give hope to anyone who is worried about death, or dying."
Here is the survey conducted by UoM that was sent out last Fall:
Here are some of the results from the survey:
Remarkable results, with primarily millennials believe they will not die, while simultaneously reporting to already be dead, which seems to be a logical conclusion: if you're already dead, you can no longer 'die'.
Studies like these spell hope for the Henderson family, and millions of families all across America. We may be one step closer to eradicating death entirely, until the concept itself, ironically, dies.
|
|
well over 70% of said age group has been literally dead like literally 8 times
|
I'd suggest you apply for a job at the Onion, but I doubt they could afford you.
|
This reminds me of two artists/architects who wanted to outlaw dying and aging. They wanted to keep on living forever by stimulating the senses in various ways. www.nytimes.com
+ Show Spoiler +Their most recent work, a house on Long Island, had a steeply sloped floor that threatened to send visitors hurtling into its kitchen. Called Bioscleave House (Lifespan Extending Villa), it featured more than three dozen paint colors; level changes meant to induce the sensation of being in two places at once; windows that seemed too high or too low; oddly angled light switches and outlets; and an absence of doors that would have permitted occupants even a modicum of privacy.
All of it was meant, the couple explained, to lead its users into a perpetually “tentative” relationship with their surroundings, and thereby keep them young.
|
Not loving a Nina blog...
What is wrong with me? Am I loosing my eDgE? Maybe I am depressed, I heard Electroconvulsive therapy shows promise! brb, teaching my toaster how to swim.
|
On June 02 2018 12:34 jrkirby wrote: I'd suggest you apply for a job at the Onion, but I doubt they could afford you.
I died laughing
Honestly I look forward to the day you (nina) write for something like the onion (if you're interested in doing that)).
|
Please ask David Houseman if he adequately controlled for the "deadass" variable. The study being conducted by the University of Mogadishu makes me question how this user sample was collected; as no demographic data is proffered, it is impossible to know how much of an influence the state of being "deadass" had on the results and I would be curious to hear how it was factored in.
|
On June 03 2018 03:26 Jealous wrote: Please ask David Houseman if he adequately controlled for the "deadass" variable. The study being conducted by the University of Mogadishu makes me question how this user sample was collected; as no demographic data is proffered, it is impossible to know how much of an influence the state of being "deadass" had on the results and I would be curious to hear how it was factored in.
I am just a journalist, damn it. I'm not getting paid to get relevant information!
On June 02 2018 19:30 JWD[9] wrote: Not loving a Nina blog...
What is wrong with me? Am I loosing my eDgE? Maybe I am depressed, I heard Electroconvulsive therapy shows promise! brb, teaching my toaster how to swim.
Maybe because it's not funny, or it's just poorly done. If you lower your expectations, the next one is sure to be better, I think. Or it could be worse.
Wait, hold on. I feel like I should be a pretentious artist.
YOU JUST DON'T "GET IT". THE HUMOR IS VERY SUBTLE.
|
|
Seems like an age thing that you possibly grow out of. People at younger ages are typically less knowledgeable about life's experiences and cannot put it together into something comprehensible. However, there are obviously adolescent individuals that do not fit into that stigma.
|
On June 07 2018 23:49 Jan1997 wrote: I got clickbaited :X
I've grown beyond regular jokes. Only meta-jokes now.
|
|
|
|