Don't Vote For Me

It's basically a popularity contest on TL. Somehow, they found out about me and decided to put me in there just to pull a Carrie and put me on stage and then dump giraffe blood all over me. VERY FUNNY, GUYS. WELL PLAYED. + Show Spoiler + YOU GOT ME. Apparently, I started being up against Liquid`Nazgul, who basically created the universe. Some people missed the button to vote for him and voted for me by accident, but in the end, I lost. Now, I'm up against TheEmulator, and he has a SNES controller for an icon, and what do I have!? A fucking mutalisk!? How can I step to that? This is obviously rigged, and asking crazy questions like "Would you rather have delicious cookies, or some boiled cabbage?" and then going "WE SHALL LET THE PEOPLE DECIDE."

But I don't want to win.

If I happened to beat TheEmulat0r by some miracle of science/jesus, I will be up against Kiett. Do you know what that means? It will be my ugly mexican face versus her adorable azn face and the fans will be like "Kiett is cute and fun and draws awesome posters, and all NinaZerg does is bitch, makes unfunny jokes, and her blogs are so random that I don't even understand them. They're just masses of text filled with nonsense. Kiett likes Bisu, and we don't know who NinaZerg likes. She probably likes Horang2 or someone." Well, fuck you guys. Well, Kiett, I know something about you. You go to Cranbrook, that's a private school!! You live a real nice life and your parents have a good relationship. You are well-educated and have bright prospects for your future! What's the matter, you embarrassed!? She don't wanna battle, she shook, cuz ain't no such thing as half-way crook. Also, you're a BIG PHONY AND DON'T EVEN PLAY PROTOSS. FOR SHAME!!1 I will play against you and pick Protoss and mind control your own units and turn them against you, if they don't just turn against you first.

But I am a fucking bum! I didn't finish college! I am really bad at math! And I did lose to Rulzbooom 0-2. I DID WATCH 8-MILE WAY TOO MANY TIMES FOR A NORMAL PERSON. I DID LOSE TO EYWA IN A SHOWMATCH. MY BOY TURTLE IS AN UNCLE TOM. YES, I DO HAVE A DUMB FRIEND NAMED CAM WHO IS CANADIAN. I AM AFRAID OF SPIDERS. I DO LIKE NICKELBACK. I don't wanna win, I'm outtie. Here, tell these people something they don't know about me.