So my gf ain't answering the phone and my mom is biased as fuck so time to turn for advice to the TL community. My sister just turned 18 the other day and she's going out.We live in a town near Zagreb(capital of Croatia),it's a 30-40 minute drive and if you want to go out you go to Zagreb obviously. If you want to get to Zagreb you need to either go with a car or take the bus.Now here's the problem,if you want to go back you need to wait till something like 5 am,or go to the other side of the city for a bus at 3:15 am.Both are a pretty major inconvenience if you want to get home any time soon.
So,she asks me if I can come pick her and a couple of her friends up at 2:30-3 am and drive them back home(this means I need to drive her friends home as well and that means I need to drive and extra 30 minutes around,because both of them aren't even near where I live) and I just really can't be bothered this time.It's not like it's the first time I did it 3 times in the last couple of months.
I'm pretty tired and not in the greatest mood,college started again 3 weeks ago and things picked up really fast so all I wanna do right is just chill out while I can on the weekends when I'm home and go to sleep at a reasonable time.I was thinking that maybe if I go I could stay up and watch the LoL finals starting at 2 am but I never make it through one of those without passing out at a point and just feel like shit the other day. Another reason is it's raining outside,maybe not anymore actually,I have to check. This is "my" car+ Show Spoiler +
.At least I wish that my car was in that condition,my version is 20 years old and I don't really feel like driving a bunch of drunk 18 year old's down the high way on a Saturday night while it's raining and I'm half awake. As I said I picked them up before like this but It's just kinda uncomfortable driving 3 people around in a car with no air bags when it's raining and foggy and I don't wanna deal with it right now.
I asked her if she can split the cost for a taxi with her other 2 friends,but she said that her friends don't have enough money for it because it's too expensive for them.She also doesn't want to ask one of her friends from Zagreb to crash at their place because she feels uncomfortable due to asking and sleeping over a few times before already. Than I ask if one of their parents can pick her up along with them,to which she replied how one of them is living alone because her parents threw her out of the house and the other one doesn't have a dad and his mother is a paraplegic and doesn't own a car.
Sigh...
Poll: Is Kefka being a dick to his sister right now?
No (50)
85%
Yes (9)
15%
59 total votes
Your vote: Is Kefka being a dick to his sister right now?
She also doesn't want to ask one of her friends from Zagreb to crash at their place because she feels uncomfortable due to asking and sleeping over a few times before already.
The equivalent of you not feeling too comfortable or willing to do it. Except you don't have a direct relationship with her friends. So nope, pretty much acceptable. Of course we're only hearing your side of it too.
She also doesn't want to ask one of her friends from Zagreb to crash at their place because she feels uncomfortable due to asking and sleeping over a few times before already.
The equivalent of you not feeling too comfortable or willing to do it. Except you don't have a direct relationship with her friends. So nope, pretty much acceptable. Of course we're only hearing your side of it too.
Well her side of it is that I should do it since it's cold outside and she doesn't have anything to do till 5 something am lol.
This is why social obligations suck. No, you're not a dick. Any normal man would be frustrated at an "offer" like this
I mean: look at it this way. By you giving them a ride they gain at the very most 45 minutes (if you arrive there at 2:30 and the bus would normally leave at 3:15) while you lose close to 2 hours, if not more on the road, in the middle of the night. I'd think of them as the real assholes to be asking for this kind of favor
I don't think you're being a dick. However, if you're having this much qualm about what to do, then you probably already know what you should be doing, and you're just trying to convince yourself of the opposite. You've already done it 3 times before in the last couple of months. You're going to end up doing it tonight. You already know that. And you're a super good guy for doing it. Doesn't change that fact that it blows though. Good luck.
Your GF isn't answering the phone because you didn't want to give your sister and her friends a ride home at 2 am, which would mean you're getting home even later? Or is she just not answering her phone for whatever reason? If the former, what the fuck...
You don't owe them a ride, they can get a ride. I also like how they already say it's too expensive to get a cab, I'm sure they checked the rates. Very, absolutely sure. /sarcasm Also, how much is the bus? lol
Also, did she plan to get drunk without planning for a ride home? If so, let her reap her own sowing.
this is one of those times when girls try to use the fact that they are girls to get something. I'm guessing it went like this TheKefka, "I'll pick you up IF I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO" Sister, "sure whatever, sounds good" later that night Sister "WE really need a ride home" TheKefka, "I said to call if IF I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO, why don't you guys have any money for a cab" Sister "We just got SOO drunk and like this one girl has a parapalegic mom, and hte other got kicked out so we can't crash at any of my friends houses without them not like hating me"
All I'm seeing here is that they planned terribly and shouldn't have gone out if they didnt have another way of getting home. Yeah you should have been a good brother and picked them up, but they shouldn't be doing this expecting special treatment over and over.
I voted no but I still would do it this time because it's her freaking birthday. I'd not do it for some time tho, and I bet you'll end up doing it (you're on the way when you said that you'd do it if they absolutely need it :D)
On October 14 2012 03:47 DigiGnar wrote: Your GF isn't answering the phone because you didn't want to give your sister and her friends a ride home at 2 am, which would mean you're getting home even later? Or is she just not answering her phone for whatever reason? If the former, what the fuck...
You don't owe them a ride, they can get a ride. I also like how they already say it's too expensive to get a cab, I'm sure they checked the rates. Very, absolutely sure. /sarcasm Also, how much is the bus? lol
Also, did she plan to get drunk without planning for a ride home? If so, let her reap her own sowing.
On October 14 2012 03:09 TheKefka wrote: w/e I told her to not get hammered too hard and call me if she really needs a ride back that bad.
Then she probably thought that she could just call you whenever and get a ride so she did not plan for any other ways to get back. Since you said this has happened a few times in the past few months, you should really sit down and set some rules with her, you will only pick her up between such times or a number of times a month and she will compensate you for each ride. If she is not responsible enough to plan these things out then make sure she knows that you will not be able to drive her whenever she needs.
As for that night, you need to weigh the danger she could be in versus how much you want to make the point that you don't exist to give her rides. Alternatively if you did pick her up you could make her agree to never asking for rides again or something of that nature. It's a shitty situation she put you in, just plan so that this cannot happen next time.
who the hell goes out without a plan to go home, seems like they're relying on you to be their errand boy, tell her to fuck off and save enough money for a taxi next time
You're not asking "am I being a dick?" so much as asking "should I go pick her up?"
a.) Can she pay for the entire taxi ride herself and get her friends to pay her back later? > If yes, then wtf, she should get a taxi. (And if she doesn't, go check for a fucking ATM machine or something...) > If no, go to the next question.
b) Can you drive safely? > If yes, move onto the next question. > If no, go discuss with your mom or something, 'cause maybe your parents can go pick her up instead. Just tell them you're not comfortable driving in this kind of weather, especially if you're tired, and imply that something horrible might happen. Seriously, two of their kids in one car in shitty weather? Talk about all the eggs in one basket.
c.) Will your mind rest easy if she doesn't get home? > If yes, then don't go pick her up and let her figure it out herself. She's 18 and should've planned for a way to get back. > If no, then you don't have a choice. Go pick her up, then sit her down next time and tell her you're not going to be doing this anymore.
She also doesn't want to ask one of her friends from Zagreb to crash at their place because she feels uncomfortable due to asking and sleeping over a few times before already.
The equivalent of you not feeling too comfortable or willing to do it. Except you don't have a direct relationship with her friends. So nope, pretty much acceptable. Of course we're only hearing your side of it too.
Well her side of it is that I should do it since it's cold outside and she doesn't have anything to do till 5 something am lol.
She also doesn't want to ask one of her friends from Zagreb to crash at their place because she feels uncomfortable due to asking and sleeping over a few times before already.
The equivalent of you not feeling too comfortable or willing to do it. Except you don't have a direct relationship with her friends. So nope, pretty much acceptable. Of course we're only hearing your side of it too.
Well her side of it is that I should do it since it's cold outside and she doesn't have anything to do till 5 something am lol.
Obviously that's trivial.
She's willing to drive 2x45 minutes for a party and wants to go home before 6-7am? That's ridiculous.
Anyways, you thought it through logically already, and you've answered your own question. It's not safe to drive in the rain, especially with drunk 18-year-olds distracting you.
EPT![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/VskON.jpg)
