I'm gonna try to put as much form and organization as possible to this blog. So, where do I start?
Ah yes, I'm a Caucasian that struggles to find his sense of identity because of his loner/nerd upbringing and just never really enjoyed sports or anything iconic of America for that matter. Most (roughly 90%) of all my friends are Chinese.
I study at the University of Oklahoma, which some people argue is the best university in the State once you deduct football culture. Anywho, lots of foreign students study here. I was working at a restaurant on campus, and whenever we took an order from a customer, we would have to take their name too. These two Asian girls walk in, but I'm not sure if they're from China, Korea, Japan, Vietnam, etc. Then I ask for a name... + Show Spoiler +
At that point, I basically gave her my "business card." A couple of other times I just happened to run across her on campus. The other night we ate dinner at the cafeteria, I forget when exactly and I treated her as a traditional boy treats a traditional girl. No kissing, no intimate touching. Trust me, it just means more trouble if you do something like that anyway- at least that's my experience.
Now, this is where I have to state openly that I do not want to be with a woman from mainland China. I don't do "pumps and dumps" because that means more trouble, more bull shit, and more drama that I bring to myself. I do not hate mainland Chinese people, I just hate mainland Chinese politics. I have had some of the biggest favors done for me from mainland Chinese people, and my best friend on the planet comes from Beijing.
Here is why I do not want to marry a Mainlander: × Limited Immigration Customs for me if I'm going to stay in China. + Show Spoiler +
Green cards for China are 100x more difficult to obtain in China than in America (where you simply need to birth children to get one).
Currently, the only thing I'm cut out for is Language Education upon graduating from my university. I have no business background, no internships, or anything of that nature which would truly put my foot in the door with business. I know I could be teaching English at any school in China, but to do it legally you have to have a work Visa. When I was 19 years old, I was doing the same work that people with master's degrees had done, but instead of a bachelor's degree and working visa, I had a high school diploma and a business visa and getting paid in cash at the end of each month.
I'm sorry, but I just do not feel comfortable with the parents of my wife living together with me and her, pregnant or not. Especially after meeting my ex's parents who openly spat on the floor of their own house, farted as loud as they wanted wherever they wanted to without shame, criticized both me and, I daresay physically abused and yelled at their daughter even though both of our education levels surpass that of their own.
So, basically I'll be going back to Taiwan for the slightly growing eSports scene there. It's not comparable to Korea, USA, or Europe, but I'm definitely looking forward to going back ASAP upon graduation. As it stands now, I have no plans to go back to the mainland at any time in the future. I don't want to go back to mainland China, and I plan on putting this poor girl down gently, because, frankly, she is not the first one to think that she could take this nice, American boy with her back home to meet her parents and say that he wants to live in China for the rest of his life.
Adding to this, most media outlets portray foreigners as evil. I hate this age-old stereotype, just watch Jet Li's "Fearless" and you immediately see how all foreigners in China are portrayed with the exception of a Garden Variety Few.
Me becoming a propaganda icon overnight in my ex's hometown.
I already responded to you in Shady's blog but I will reiterate it to you here:
Those disgusting family customs aren't mainland customs. You can extrapolate that to Taiwan as well. I actually had this conversation with some mainland friends a while back, and we'd all shared pretty much the same experiences of these "family customs."
Not to mention, my (Taiwanese) grandparents on my dad's side who are living in the US are currently living with one of my uncles and aunts + a nanny + my two younger cousins. When I was growing up, my (Taiwanese) family also lived with my (Taiwanese) grandparents. In fact, when my parents first moved to the US, we all lived in the same damn house as my cousins, uncles, aunts, and grandparents for a while before people started moving out one by one ...
A lot of these "differences" in customs that you're seeing between mainlander and Taiwanese families are nonexistent. Imho it just seems like you're prejudiced against mainlanders and are looking at Taiwan (or should I say "Taipei"?) through rose-tinted glasses.
Now, if you had said Taiwanese people are better 'cause we invented bubble tea ... then you'd have a valid point~
Main reason I stopped dating my gf from Ningbo was because of her lack of willingness to leave her parents and go anywhere else in the world, so I know how it goes. I can't say I know the difference in customs between the mainland and Taiwan, but the best thing to do is go for a multi-cultured person from any country that you can share these wordly experiences with. I'm still looking for that, but hey, there's plenty of great women in the world. However, I must say I miss getting blackout drunk with my ex-gf's dad on 白酒 hahaha.
On September 12 2012 04:36 P7GAB wrote: your thinking of marriage before you even date her? and your worrying about not having a greencard if you marry her?
Not me, but I'm wondering what she's thinking instead. My experience in the mainland has always left me feeling funny. I failed to mention that in the course of time I spent chasing my ex around, never once did I kiss her. She asked me these silly questions: "if you had a baby would you want a boy or a girl?" for example.
And Taiwan is the win for inventing bubble tea, and inventing the android. And having immigration customs that don't require me to get married.
On September 12 2012 05:00 Shady Sands wrote: Just as an FYI, as you get more visibility in eSports, posts like this are going to come back and haunt you. You might want to think about that.
E: This is not because I find your views distasteful--but because it will be very easy for other people to twist them into something ugly.
Then let them propagate me just as they did with jet li renouncing his Chinese citizenship!
On September 12 2012 05:00 Shady Sands wrote: Just as an FYI, as you get more visibility in eSports, posts like this are going to come back and haunt you. You might want to think about that.
E: This is not because I find your views distasteful--but because it will be very easy for other people to twist them into something ugly.
Then let them propagate me just as they did with jet li renouncing his Chinese citizenship!
Hahaha... you're white. You'll probably be able to get away with some stuff, but after seeing what Yang Rui (a national Chinese TV news show host, think Keith Olbermann or Bill O'Reilly) said on his microblog, you might want to watch out.
On September 12 2012 05:00 Shady Sands wrote: Just as an FYI, as you get more visibility in eSports, posts like this are going to come back and haunt you. You might want to think about that.
E: This is not because I find your views distasteful--but because it will be very easy for other people to twist them into something ugly.
Then let them propagate me just as they did with jet li renouncing his Chinese citizenship!
Hahaha... you're white. You'll probably be able to get away with some stuff, but after seeing what Yang Rui (a national Chinese TV news show host, think Keith Olbermann or Bill O'Reilly) said on his microblog, you might want to watch out.
Personally, I don't think many guys my age in China would have a problem with me saying this if you get my drift.
On September 12 2012 06:45 rauk wrote: 95% chance you're going to be living with your gfs parents in taiwan too just saying
I'll take your word for it.
my main problem is being propagated as a bad person and stared at by everyone in the mainland. That's the creepiest part. Still, to stay there, I don't have to be married like I have to be in China.
just passing through here, dont know jack shit about china on this matter. I am interested however, because I have heard the mention of mainland china and non mainland(?) china before. Is mainland china like every part of china except for places that have been under colony rule until relatively recently such as Hong Kong?
As someone who has no idea about the difference between cultures in mainland/Taiwan/Hong Kong etc. It seems like you are reading a lot into this. Can you really judge all 1.3 billion+ mainland Chinese based on a few experiences and general prejudice?
In any case, I enjoy reading your blogs about life as a Mandarin speaking white person who is interested in starcraft
On September 12 2012 07:44 B.I.G. wrote: just passing through here, dont know jack shit about china on this matter. I am interested however, because I have heard the mention of mainland china and non mainland(?) china before. Is mainland china like every part of china except for places that have been under colony rule until relatively recently such as Hong Kong?
The term "mainland China" is a bit outdated at this point. Back during the Cold War, Taiwan called itself "Free China", and theoretically was set on "retaking the Mainland". Hong Kong was also theoretically part of China, but the UK was sort of renting it until 1997. As such, you had "Mainland" referring to the large Chinese territory, and you had other lands that were also called themselves Chinese.
As Hong Kong has been returned to China now, and Taiwan/Republic of China has pretty much renounced its claim on ruling the territory currently controlled by the People's Republic of China, the term "China" means the same thing as "Mainland China". It's outdated in that it only still makes sense if you believe there's a China outside of that, which there isn't.
Yeah, while you do seem like you know understand a considerable amount of Chinese culture, this kind of attitude is by no means as widespread as you think, I think, at least in my experience and interactions there.
Cool that you actually learned traditional though lol
On September 12 2012 07:44 B.I.G. wrote: just passing through here, dont know jack shit about china on this matter. I am interested however, because I have heard the mention of mainland china and non mainland(?) china before. Is mainland china like every part of china except for places that have been under colony rule until relatively recently such as Hong Kong?
The term "mainland China" is a bit outdated at this point. Back during the Cold War, Taiwan called itself "Free China", and theoretically was set on "retaking the Mainland". Hong Kong was also theoretically part of China, but the UK was sort of renting it until 1997. As such, you had "Mainland" referring to the large Chinese territory, and you had other lands that were also called themselves Chinese.
As Hong Kong has been returned to China now, and Taiwan/Republic of China has pretty much renounced its claim on ruling the territory currently controlled by the People's Republic of China, the term "China" means the same thing as "Mainland China". It's outdated in that it only still makes sense if you believe there's a China outside of that, which there isn't.
Don't tell me you're going in the direction with this post that I think you are...
If Taiwan actually reunites with the mainland, I'm gonna be pissed. I wanted to stay there for the rest of my life. The only other place I'd consider is SG, and it already suffers from overpopulation / overimmigration issues.
Back on topic: I'm a pretty bitchy guy sometimes, just like Lu Xun (魯迅), whom I've learned hated basically everything about the traditional culture of China and hated everything about most uneducated Chinese people, and would probably hate modern day Mainland China...
Taiwan will eventually reunite with the mainland, but don't worry, it probably won't happen in our lifetime. the status quo right now is too beneficial for all three parties (China, Taiwan, US).
also, i'm gonna reiterate what babylon already said - those "differences" between mainlanders and taiwanese are definitely not as vast as you think they are. you're looking at taipei, as babylon said, through rose tinted glasses. those "traditional customs" and whatnot are in both countries. it really just depends on who you meet.
while it might be true that those "traditional customs" occur more in the mainland than in Taiwan, in the end, it depends on the family and the individual. this comparison is not too different from the comparison between the SAT scores of blacks and whites. yes, on average, whites score better than blacks, but if you look at the two distributions (probably bell curves), there is sooooo much overlap between the two groups. only a tiny percentage at each end of the distributions do not overlap.
EPT
