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Hey TL
I normally start off my blogs with a small paragraph at the top, however, today is going to be a bit different. I don't want to be dramatic about this, but this struck me as something that I thought would make a good blog, and it happened today  .
Am I a Chode?
I ask this question, not because I believe I am one - in truth I'm a nice enough guy -, rather, becuase today a friend of mine told me that I am one. I don't mean told me as in a friendly, FUCK YOU BRO, YOU ARE SUCH A PRICK after stealing his food or something, I mean it like he was telling me that in truth I'm a dick, a small one at that. Before you make up your mind prematurely about my situation, I'd like to present you all with some facts.
- I'm about 5'6"
- When I entered highschool I was 4'6"
- I have certain tendencies that people may see as douchey
- The school I go to is not your regular school, its kind of weird (very, kind of weird)
- The kid I'm talking to has some merit to what he says, I'm not perfect after all
- I tend to get picked on, more so this year than last
- I have done select sports and been over the top about them, like Muay Thai and video games
- I try to carry myself in a good light, but that light has changed immensely over the last 3-4 years
His Side of the Story
I feel like I should say his, not because I should have my side of the story portrayed last so that it sticks in your heads beter, but rather because I'd like him to make the first statement about me, and I will provide some evidence about him afterwards.
Here is his side of the story,
- I have certain tendencies, such as seeing something funny in my own personal life, and then exclaiming to the group about them. I know that this sounds attention whorey, and it is I don't deny that, but I've mostly worked on this to get it to the point where it really hasn't happened in literal months.
- I am a chode, whatever the fuck he means by that.
- Other tendencies I have, I tend to walk kind of slowly, so people can see this as me strutting, but rather its just me walking slowly, literally. I tend to also, when answering a stupid question, turn my head slowly with my eyes closed. Yes I know thats very douchebag like, but its in an ingrained reaction, which I am trying to work on. I also, because of lack of sleep due to school work (and my insistence on playing video games, writing blogs, and doing the things I love) so can be forgetful.
- Back on the attention thing. Whenever I don't get a topic, I tend to joke about, and I tend to not take it too seriously in school. Its a defense mechanism, and its not great, but a lot of people literally, just scream out that all I want is attention.
- Most times the first experience is the most powerful, and so as a freshman, I was much worse about a lot of this than I am now.
- I used to have a huge ego as a freshman, that got beat down quick, it was mostly to compensate for my lack of height, athletics, muscle, etc. that and I used to really think that people truly cared if I did something.
- He said that I'm an ass in real life, but my friends that aren't here 24/7 don't see that, so they think I'm a nice guy.
- The last part is that he says I'm a try hard.
and to clarify some parts I'm going to go into some detail. I used to be much worse than I am now about this stuff, but that comes with a lot of maturity and personal growth. Along with this, I have a lot of friends outside my school, and just about everyone mooches off them considering I'm an outgoing person who makes lots of interesting friends. I also have done things that would make a lot of these claims true, and some of them are exascerbated and overdone by my "friends." One such claim is that I carry myself in that I only play video games, when this is clearly not true, he said thats how it seems.
TL;DR: I'm an attention whore, though better than I used to be, I also am a supposed try-hard, I am a chode, and I have tendencies that make me seem douche-baggey.
My Side of the Story
For my side of the story I'm going to be as impartial and objective about myself as possible. I understand this may seem a bit stupid, and I further understand that if anyone has qualms with this form of "defense" if you want to call it that, can explain so in the comments (I'll try to respond since I read most all of them).
Here is my side,
- The main point is that I'm not a chode, but rather most people in my class are really, really insecure, as apparently am I, since I feel the need to write this blog.
- Most of the people that pick on me have glaring flaws that I don't even have to know them well to see. For instance, one girl that does this regularly (and sometimes doesn't even mean well or want to be funny) is a girl who is incredibly clingy, she hangs around the same people and is never seen without them. The guy that was picking on me today, though he is a friend, has MANY more glaring flaws than I do (I have worked on a LOT of them, a lot of soul searching and a lot of personal refinement through out highschool) such as: he doesn't have friends outside school, so he just mooches off mine and then has the gaul to tell me that they don't know the "real me"; he has 1 true friend, the other ones that he thinks are his friends aren't really and have changed while he has stayed the same; he overcompensates immensely, today he told me that he was talking with our mutual friend group about how if he practiced as much video games as I do (LOL 1 game per day
 , he didn't know that till I told him) that he would apparently be so much better than me at everything (he literally meant everything).
- The school I go to is really, really weird. The kids that go here are not your typical highschool kid. We don't have the jocks, and we don't have dweebs. The popular girl cliques are not made of pretty girls, they are made of girls who make other people fear them. Also everyone at my school, save a select few with real present or past issues are all just complaining first world problems people. I'm sure this makes me seem like an enormous hypocrite since I'm at this school, but I just have never truly fit in with that environment.
- I have refined myself as a person, much more so than most people give me credit for, there was a lot of soul searching that went on in my head.
- I have an amazing girlfriend, and this guy can't get shit as a gf, which goes back to the mooching thing. I am a bit butthurt about the convo, but this is a real statement, and this rings true for most of the guys at my school.
and though this may seem lopsided, which it may be, I know my side better than the oppositions side.
TL;DR: I'm actually a lot better than this guy seems to think I am, and there is quite a bit of hypocrisy in him telling me off
I'd like to add in a few closing thoughts. One is that, I'm trying to fight both sides passionately here, and though I give anecdotes to save my ass, I know for a fact that I also have glaring flaws. I'm not taking this to TL so you guys can give me any form of instant gratification, I want to know if I'm doing it wrong, and if I'm just a dick and am good at hiding it. I also want to point out that everyone here is kept anonymous, no names are being put in this post with good reason. Finally, I'm a pretty chill dude, and I like introspection, if you give me constructive criticism I'll try to put it forward.
 
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Blazinghand
United States25552 Posts
Your friend sounds like a dick. Anyone who argues so passionately that his friend is a dick is a dick. Especially if he's doing it because you tell it like it is.
Don't worry, just keep on doing your thing. Dicks come and go but a solid pair of balls is forever. Nobody knows enough about you to tell if you're a dick here on the internet.
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I haven't thought about the rest of it hard enough to come up with a general response, but the try hard bit caught my eye. My first reaction when someone says somebody else is a try hard is that person a is either jealous of person b, that person a has low self esteem, or a combination of both.
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I don't want to put the guy down, but I see where both of you are coming from on this one. Also blazing, that is a godlike quote, "Dicks come and go, but a solid pair of balls is forever." - Blazinghand 2012.
Thrawns, I see where you are coming from on that. Though I hope I wasn't too harsh about this.
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Have you tried to care less about what others think about you? I think that would be helpful for you.
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On September 07 2012 08:52 Flip9 wrote:
Have you tried to care less about what others think about you? I think that would be helpful for you.
In general Idgaf, but this really got me thinking. This is a guy I hold in fairly high esteem so I thought making a blog would be a suitable idea to get ideas from the community.
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eh I dont think I was trying to make a point that he's an ass... although from this limited set of information it does appear like he acted like one...but my point was more that he has reasons for talking bad about you which may not be entirely related to you at all. his statements could easily have been a confused and misguided way of trying to make himself feel better about things he is personally uncomfortable about
so you can obviously disagree with him but just try to realize that your opinion of his statements shouldn't stop at: "he's being unreasonably rude or he's dumb," you gotta know that he could have reasons and personal emotions responsible for making him say the things he said
either way just try to be cool with him and if that doesn't work then move on without hard feelings
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I don't get it. You make it sound like you have a few habits that make you look slightly douchey, and your friend is either insecure or an asshole. Like I said though, I don't get it. I'm not sure what you want other people here to tell you. No one here can tell if you're a dick or not based on what you wrote. It's not like this is a discussion about some action you took and whether it was dickish to do it or not, this is about you as a person in general, and a forum blog post won't let anyone know that; they'd have to spend time with you to figure that out.
Here's some questions though:
Do you think you're a dick?
Do you care if other people think you're a dick?
That's all you need to answer, really. Based on your blog, the answers are probably, No and Yes. So, ask yourself, why do you care if this guy thinks you're a dick?
Also, to answer if you're a chode, look at you penis. Is it wider than it is long? Then I apologize, but the answer is yes.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chode
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On September 07 2012 09:01 Mr. Wiggles wrote:I don't get it. You make it sound like you have a few habits that make you look slightly douchey, and your friend is either insecure or an asshole. Like I said though, I don't get it. I'm not sure what you want other people here to tell you. No one here can tell if you're a dick or not based on what you wrote. It's not like this is a discussion about some action you took and whether it was dickish to do it or not, this is about you as a person in general, and a forum blog post won't let anyone know that; they'd have to spend time with you to figure that out. Here's some questions though: Do you think you're a dick? Do you care if other people think you're a dick? That's all you need to answer, really. Based on your blog, the answers are probably, No and Yes. So, ask yourself, why do you care if this guy thinks you're a dick? Also, to answer if you're a chode, look at you penis. Is it wider than it is long? Then I apologize, but the answer is yes. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chode
I understand that no one can tell if I am a dick from the interwebz, I guess what I'm trying to get out of this is if this looks at all familiar to stuff that everyone else has gone through or if I'm just kind of out there. Also yeah I think everyone is a bit insecure in highschool. Also blogs are CRAZY therapeutic.
Also
+ Show Spoiler +my penis is, in fact, not a chode, GASP!
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Most people I know (including very close friends) consider me to be a dick. Do I care? Hell no. Why should I care what someone else thinks about me? Confidence is key. If someone thinks you're a dick, say fuck them and go on with your life.
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if you felt this argument warranted an entire blog post. im sorry to say you are probably a very think, very stout/stocky chode.
Seriously though. even if your friend calls you a chode in jest. Fuck him, dont ever let people tell you what you are, joking or not. If it's in good fun send it back his way. But dont ever internalize it like this and develop arguments and counter-arguments based around you being a short dick. It's just silly
Logically, you're arguing semantics and word meaning anyway. With a dash of ego. Are you actually physically a short dick? Emotionally you might be, but you're in control of that.
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So... your friend decided to call you a very offensive term, and then argued his case for it?
Well I think we already know who's the chode here.
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I have done select sports and been over the top about them, like Muay Thai and video games
Yep, you're a chode
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Its just highschool. When you move on with your life you will realize how dumb all this drama is. First reply is spot on. BALLS FOR LIFE.
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TLADT24920 Posts
Based on reading what you wrote, it doesn't sound like it. As mentioned, it sounds like there are some emotions or other stuff going on on your friend's end that caused him to say that to you. I wouldn't worry about it and just focus on keeping you with improving yourself as you mentioned 
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First off, what is a chode (as a reference to a person).
From what ive gathered from urbandictionary, it's a "short stubby penis". rofl
From what i extracted from your blog, you seem like a cocky person, but someone who's willing to improve himself when given the chance. At first sight, you probably make the impression of someone with high confidence, and most people will take this as a quality of an ignorant person, but that's not the case. You're someone who has strong convictions, and willing to speak your thoughts in a truthful manner. You have a positive personality, so you shouldnt let other people get you down.
Also, as mentioned before in this blog, you're still in a highschool environment, so I wouldn't take anything anyone says in a serious manner. Just keep what you're doing.
I'm sorry if this comes across as too romantic, but that's what i gathered from your writing.
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lololol here I thought it was going to be a girl blog of a sort. My friends and I use the word 'chode' to mean typical nice guys like those that run rampant around TL blogs.
As for your situation, i don't really think so. It seems more like tall poppy syndrome to me. Yeah don't take too much stock of what he says or get alot of second opinions if you so wish.
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You had to ask and even made a blog about it... I think you know the answer
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Blazinghand
United States25552 Posts
On September 08 2012 02:14 QuanticHawk wrote:
You had to ask and even made a blog about it... I think you know the answer
It's like Abraham Lincoln said: "being a chode is like being bald. If you have to ask people if you are, you are."
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LOL. I would say based on the title, you confirm that you are indeed an attention whore. You confirmed that you are of shorter stature.
Attention whore + Short stature = Chode in my book
Seriously though, hilarious title.
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EPT
