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Almost Baby Mama Drama

Blogs > docvoc
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docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-31 00:40:38
July 30 2012 22:56 GMT
#1
Hey guys, a while since I blogged, I might make one of the trip I took to LA, but that will come after all of my summer highschool homework is done. Today I want to literally talk at you via this blog, almost throwing a bit of my life at you randoms who I don't personally know but respect pretty highly even with that anonemity. I am in a relationship, with an amazing girl, we will call her FERIXE[RIS]CTY, or felicity for those not pronuncially gifted.

This girl is awesome, she is sweet, she treats me really well, and we are pretty much the happiest couple EVAR. That being said, we had made plans to be each others first times. Now this went pretty badly. I'm not going to brag about my insane abilites in the sack



+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]




On a more serious note, that night had been agreed upon and I bought the shittiest condoms I thought were great, fucking trojan condoms, god do those suck. The first time we had sex, I thought one broke, so I drove her to get the day after pill which made her cranky, angry, and all the other hormonal problems that pill brings. Lets just say it was sub-optimal. We both had a great time and such, and for the usual highschool underaged sex thing, it was good knowing I was with someone who genuinely liked me and wasn't going to spread rumors of our sex, like Kim K.



+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]




Well the problems only started when she by-accident texted the wrong person that we had done the dirty. Of course every girl (and guy for that matter too) is excited to lose it, and if I didn't go to a tiny private school, that wouldn't be such a wierd thing. However, she accidentally texted a girl that broke it off with her and thats when the issues started, I had to control them pretty hard and I did my best, but it was all over at that point, rumors were out and bleh I didn't realy care either way; however, I was a bit distraught at the time that shit had gone so far by the time I even knew it had happened. Highschool drama, what can you do -_-;;;;;.



+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]




So of course we had teh sexes several more times, in varying places from my room, to fields under the stars to the back of my car (just to be extra trashy). Its kind of an enigmatic thing sex is. On the one hand you have this activity that feels amazing and it makes your bond with another person, as the league legends community would say, TOO STRONK, better nerf Irelia. The downside is where my blog was meant to be focused, on what happens when shit gets real.



+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]




My gf and I were having sex in my room on the 4th of July, 'MURIKA, and though I didn't know this, my girlfriend was ovulating (even after having been on the pill for a month), and her family is extremely fertile. Now despite the fact that she was on the pill and I had a condom, one of those two was bound to be lackluster when it came time, much like a limp dick of a guy when its "show-time." I'm betting you guessed before I even had to say what broke, lol, and yes it was the condom. I came inside her, pretty hard, and that was what led us onto this about 4 week long, "I might be pregnant, babe," thing we had going on. Now mind you, we are in a serious relationship and I know a lot of people don't enjoy those especially in highschool, but we both think we found our "one person in the world," despite the fact that there are probably a lot more people out there that we could both be with. Knowing this fact I was at a crossroads.



+ Show Spoiler +
[image loading]




Now of course, every story that I have tends to have a happy ending, (no not that HAPPY ending , perverts) and everything ended just fine. She is not pregnant, thank god, and there is no baby Lee running around being a small jew with two different colored eyes except only 2ft tall lol. There was a time I thought for sure I was gonna be a dad, and that scared me, but through thick and thin I love my gf and she is very important to me. On the flip side, THANK FUCKING GOD I AM NOT A DAD lol.


***
User was warned for too many mimes.
iGrok
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States5142 Posts
July 30 2012 23:02 GMT
#2
Congrats on not being a dad.

Hopefully you've learned something from what has got to rank among the scariest moments in your life.
MOTM | Stim.tv | TL Mafia | Fantasy Fighting! | SNSD
Mattson
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
Canada188 Posts
July 30 2012 23:09 GMT
#3
LOL WTF did I just read.

There's only one thing I'd like to say:

"Well the problems only started when she by-accident texted the wrong person that we had done the dirty."

This was no accident.

Cynicism isn't wisdom; it's a lazy way to say that you've been burned. Seems if anything you'd be less certain after everything you ever learned.
aRyuujin
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States5049 Posts
July 30 2012 23:23 GMT
#4
well good job not being a dad
but this was one of the weirdest girl blogs i've read
can i get my estro logo back pls
r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
July 30 2012 23:27 GMT
#5
I consider myself to be comparatively... erhm... fond of sharing my love as much as I can but I never had a condom break on me.

HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO DO THAT?

I mean, sure, if you're the type of guy who keeps that stuff in his wallet for a year or so then I can understand it. Or, if you let her put it on when she has no experience but long fingernails instead... but besides stuff like that.. how? =S
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
ShaLLoW[baY]
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Canada12499 Posts
July 30 2012 23:37 GMT
#6
Yeah not sure how they break either, unless it's a subtle brag and no condom can handle your girth
ALEXISONFIRE ARE FUCKING BACK (sAviOr for life)
PrinceXizor
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States17713 Posts
July 30 2012 23:41 GMT
#7
On July 31 2012 08:27 r.Evo wrote:
I consider myself to be comparatively... erhm... fond of sharing my love as much as I can but I never had a condom break on me.

HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO DO THAT?

I mean, sure, if you're the type of guy who keeps that stuff in his wallet for a year or so then I can understand it. Or, if you let her put it on when she has no experience but long fingernails instead... but besides stuff like that.. how? =S

had a condom break on me as i put it on immediately grabbed another one, didn't break. Some condoms (incredibly tiny) just break. though if it breaks during it could be because the condom is too large (and shifts during sex pushing the tip over yourself too tightly) or things aren't lubed enough (and shifts during sex pushing the tip over yourself too tightly)
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
July 30 2012 23:48 GMT
#8
On July 31 2012 08:09 Mattson wrote:
LOL WTF did I just read.

There's only one thing I'd like to say:

"Well the problems only started when she by-accident texted the wrong person that we had done the dirty."

This was no accident.



as much as it seems like it wasn't she had saved a number in her phone to the wrong person and then some chick decided she didn't want to be friends anymore, so yeah 2 links that ended badly, 1 was an honest mistake, and the other girl IMO, total bitch.
User was warned for too many mimes.
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
July 30 2012 23:50 GMT
#9
On July 31 2012 08:37 ShaLLoW[baY] wrote:
Yeah not sure how they break either, unless it's a subtle brag and no condom can handle your girth

Hah, not exactly, as the poster under you stated, the condom slipped because apparently I'm not nearly as hung-like-a-horse as I should be so it shifted and I popped that shit.
User was warned for too many mimes.
Epishade
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
United States2267 Posts
July 30 2012 23:51 GMT
#10
I remember something from a TV show or movie or something that was like "happy not a father day". Your situation reminded me of it.

I wish I could write a blog about sex, but my life is too boring right now.
Pinhead Larry in the streets, Dirty Dan in the sheets.
Durp
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Canada3117 Posts
July 30 2012 23:51 GMT
#11
Other than the oddly placed spoliered memes, I enjoyed this girl blog.

And awesomely for you the tl;dr is: got laid in high school, didn't knock up ovulating girlfriend.

GG sir, GG.
SOOOOOooooOOOOooooOOOOoo Many BANELINGS!!
HackBenjamin
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada1094 Posts
July 31 2012 00:05 GMT
#12
Trojan is not so bad. Durex is bad. Durex is owned by the same company that owns Huggies I think? Do the math.
WaveofShadow
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada31495 Posts
July 31 2012 00:10 GMT
#13
So.....the opposite of my blog?
Sort of?
twitch.tv/waveofshadow ||| Winner of AHGL's So You Think You Can Cast! ||| Juicy Dad for lyfe ||| 'idk i get a kick out of stupid things' - Jarms Yarng
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
July 31 2012 00:37 GMT
#14
On July 31 2012 08:51 Durp wrote:
Other than the oddly placed spoliered memes, I enjoyed this girl blog.

And awesomely for you the tl;dr is: got laid in high school, didn't knock up ovulating girlfriend.

GG sir, GG.

Most of blogs I read tend to crash on slow internet connections like school ones so I did that with the spaces to try to make it as easy as possible on the eyes and the bandwith, that and I haven't figured out how to put small text under a picture -_-;;;. Yeah the unfortunate part of ovulation is that apparently girls only know after it happens, thats definitely GG lol.
User was warned for too many mimes.
Jaaaaasper
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States10225 Posts
July 31 2012 00:45 GMT
#15
Congratz on the not having a baby, and im glad for you that you have found an awesome girl friend.
Hey do you want to hear a joke? Chinese production value. | I thought he had a aegis- Ayesee | When did 7ing mad last have a good game, 2012?
Livelovedie
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States492 Posts
July 31 2012 02:00 GMT
#16
If she is on birth control she won't get pregnant if she is taking it correctly and without other meds no matter how "extremely fertile" she is.
MapleFractal
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
Canada307 Posts
July 31 2012 03:31 GMT
#17
Dude check the expiry date on those Jimmies! Holy moly its using rubbers 101. Never had a rubber snap on me ( thank god), but I have had the pregnancy scare. Grats on not knocking her up lol

/highfive
its called a Tuque damnit!
ranshaked
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States870 Posts
July 31 2012 03:39 GMT
#18
My gf has an iud and I use a condom, and I still freak out every time hah
vaderseven
Profile Joined September 2008
United States2556 Posts
July 31 2012 05:22 GMT
#19
On July 31 2012 11:00 Livelovedie wrote:
If she is on birth control she won't get pregnant if she is taking it correctly and without other meds no matter how "extremely fertile" she is.


LoL
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
July 31 2012 05:34 GMT
#20
On July 31 2012 11:00 Livelovedie wrote:
If she is on birth control she won't get pregnant if she is taking it correctly and without other meds no matter how "extremely fertile" she is.

Thats actually a misconception (pardon the pun) you can still get pregnant because sometimes the pill fails to keep the egg out of the filopian tube, but that hopefully will never be the case.

Also you can break a rubber if it does not fit well and you pump too fast, it will break the rubber by having the end come off too far and basically snap in the seam in the middle. Thats what happened to me T.T
User was warned for too many mimes.
ZeromuS
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
Canada13405 Posts
July 31 2012 05:47 GMT
#21
On July 31 2012 14:34 docvoc wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 31 2012 11:00 Livelovedie wrote:
If she is on birth control she won't get pregnant if she is taking it correctly and without other meds no matter how "extremely fertile" she is.

Thats actually a misconception (pardon the pun) you can still get pregnant because sometimes the pill fails to keep the egg out of the filopian tube, but that hopefully will never be the case.

Also you can break a rubber if it does not fit well and you pump too fast, it will break the rubber by having the end come off too far and basically snap in the seam in the middle. Thats what happened to me T.T


Then get the right sized condoms :/after 6 years with my gf ive never had one break ever.
StrategyRTS forever | @ZeromuS_plays | www.twitch.tv/Zeromus_
Antimatterz
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States1010 Posts
July 31 2012 05:51 GMT
#22
Lol these girl blogs are always so entertaining, at the end I was like "Oh shit you are so fucked man, GG" but then it never happened.
"HotBid [11:45 AM]: i dunno i kinda like the big muta shooting smaller mutas out"
Chaves
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Brazil315 Posts
July 31 2012 12:46 GMT
#23
lol you live in america, you have the possibility (sh1t, is that right?) of abort (not sure about that word either) ...

Here in brazil abort its illegal, or if you ar or get some1 pragmant ... you ar screw no choice!
Dirkzor
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
Denmark1944 Posts
July 31 2012 14:21 GMT
#24
On July 31 2012 09:37 docvoc wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 31 2012 08:51 Durp wrote:
Other than the oddly placed spoliered memes, I enjoyed this girl blog.

And awesomely for you the tl;dr is: got laid in high school, didn't knock up ovulating girlfriend.

GG sir, GG.

Most of blogs I read tend to crash on slow internet connections like school ones so I did that with the spaces to try to make it as easy as possible on the eyes and the bandwith, that and I haven't figured out how to put small text under a picture -_-;;;. Yeah the unfortunate part of ovulation is that apparently girls only know after it happens, thats definitely GG lol.


I laughed... =) Been in the scared zone myself. Not really that funny. I actually threw out a pregnancy test just a few weeks ago that was forgotten in my closest...

About making small text under pictures try this:

[center][I]Normal size text, Italic, Centered[/i][/center]
[center][small]Small size text, Centered][/small][/center]


Normal size text, Italic, Centered

Small size text, Centered


"HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ON TOP AGAIN???? HOW DO YOU KEEP DOING THIS????" -Julmust (also, thats what she said)
KING CHARLIE :D
Profile Blog Joined March 2012
United States447 Posts
July 31 2012 14:50 GMT
#25
I envy you. Sex has never been close to enigmatic for me.

Maybe it's the years and years of ritualistic sexual, physical and psychological abuse talking, but it's always seemed like a primitive act. I'd much rather beat off to cartoons or the Matrix Trilogy.

Well written, it captured me honestly.
NO TEAM WILL EVER BE AS GOOD AS TEAM LIQUID!
OpticalShot
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Canada6330 Posts
July 31 2012 15:02 GMT
#26
Interesting read...
I'll take it, yeah, it's not like the glorious old days of 5-6 new girl blogs / day.
[TLMS] REBOOT
UmbraaeternuS
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Chile476 Posts
July 31 2012 17:59 GMT
#27
On July 31 2012 14:47 ZeromuS wrote:
Then get the right sized condoms :/after 6 years with my gf ive never had one break ever.


THIS.

Most ruptures are caused by not having the proper sized condoms in the first place, not a thing about the technique of putting the condom on or how rough you/she are/is.
therealwinters - Skype / @DrUmbra - Twitter // "There is nothing more cool than being proud of the things that you love" - Sean "Day[9]" Plott <3
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