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If any of you remember, a few weeks back I made a blog where I was going crazy about this one girl, of course. Of course, if you knew her you would know why. Oh man. Ohh man is she something to behold.
Anyway, things are a little different now. Not for the worse, by any stretch, but just different; we know each other a little better now. Again, I will explain the Whole Story in another blog post, but let me just say that I fell for this girl over facebook chat. We had a mutual friend, and began talking, and then.. magical things began to occur to my brain.
But then we met, and she turned out to like me, and I asked her out that very day. Thing is, we already knew each other deeply, before ever even saying a word to one another. In fact... I fell in love with her before we even looked into each others' eyes for more than a grand total of 10 seconds. Before I knew what she smelled like.
So last night we went walking, again. This time she asked me to; this was under the idea that she wanted be to "bitch" to her. I help her out all the time with her problems (like self-esteem stuff etc), and she thought that I should reciprocate. I agreed, because as many of you should know trust is a two way street; I felt as though she was trusting me with so much and I was having difficulty exposing my own issues.
So we walked for a little while, until settling at the very same elementary school field that I wrote about in my last blog post. And she was, "Okay, now bitch." Of course at first I was hesitant, but then I took a seat in the dew-coated grass and started to explain to her my root of all evil. I was going in a time line, and I reached fourth grade, (and at this point I am feeling kind of emotionally vulnerable), and she said something, that I didn't quite catch...
Me: "Sorry, what?"
Her: "Haha, nothiiiing, nothing don't worry about it."
Me: "Whaaat? You can't just do that, say something to infest my mind and then just leave me hangin' there when I ask for clarification :<" //yeah I speak like that in real life, I'm weird I know 
Her: "Just go on, it's fine haha okay..."
Me: "..alrigh--"
Her: "I love you." //She said this very offhandedly and casually//
.
.
.
That hit my chest like a mack truck. Just her saying those words, in real life, THREE SIMPLE WORDS. It is unbelievable, to me, how so little could carry such high merit. Incredible.
The thing is, she had said this before to me, before we were seeing one another (literally). It killed me then, as well, but I am pretty sure she meant more of a friendly kind of thing. Not like romantic, Romeo-and-Juliet, I'd-die-to-save-you, may-we-always-be-together kind of thing. Haha. So I didn't know what to make of it at first...
Me: "Uh, ahah, thank you..." //*facepalm* "thank you" what the fuck//
*pause* *she is smiling and we are looking at each other*
Me: "Wait. What did you just say?"
Her: "I love you."
Me: "Like... the same way that I love you?"
Her: "MmHM "
Me: "I... You can't just spring that on me like that! I'm like totally emotionally vulnerable right now! I... I love you too."
*takes her hand for a moment*
.
.
.
Just saying those words made me so happy. "I love you... too." SHE SAID IT FIRST! I'm melting. Melting, I tell you. And then...
Her: "Now continue on with your story, I don't want to interrupt you."
Me: "Hhhhugh. You managed to anyway. But if you insist..."
And I continued on. And it was great. I was sharing myself with her, and we were connected, and it was wonderful. I never felt so fucking alive! Her face, her eyes, her words... sown into my memory forever.
After a time, I walked her home. We were standing outside her house, doing our typical thing of awkward collective decision making, on whether or not we should kiss, and she was just jokin' around or something because I was like...
Me: "Ahh, you'ze so crazy."
Her: "I am not!"
Me: "You admit yourself that you're crazy."
Her: "Alright, fine then, FINE, I am crazy, bye.." *begins walking off acting all angry*
Me: "Hey hey, wait a second...."
Her: "Yes?" *expectant smile*
Me: "Before you go I think we should kiss. You know."
Her: "But whyyyy. It's so grooooss." //Yes, she is playing here 
Me: "No I promise, it helps."
Her: *drawing closer* "With what?"
Me: "Like... all the hormones that are fucking with your head right now..."
Her: *fake exasperation* "Fiiiine..."
And then kissed, for a while. I had my hands on her waist and she arms around my shoulders. And it was amazing, of course, as well as interesting. I could tell she was trying to make it interesting, because she would start to pull away, and move back in once more, teasing me. And planting little signature kisses on my lips between long drawn out ones. Oh my god, I can actually smell her right now as I think of this.
And then we stopped kissing, and just had our foreheads pressed against one another's. I made some sort of sound, probably a breathy "bhhhmphhr," because she went...
Her: "Haha you are so weird after we kiss."
Me: "I know, I'm sorry.."
Her: "It's fine, don't worry about it haha"
Me: "Yeah.. haha, it's just... bhhhh.. hard to keep you real, in my mind. Uh. Sorry. Ehehehe"
Her: "Hahah, mmkay. Well good night then, haha."
Me: "Good night."
yeah, I really let my so-called game slip there at the end. It's just really fucking hard to concentrate when you kiss someone like that who means that much to you who also just recently disclosed that they love you. Also.. + Show Spoiler +at this point I am still getting fucking hard-ons when we kiss, so that is something I need to... "work on" or however I should say it. Pretty much just get over myself. But yeah that makes it hard to think as well.
I had a wonderful night last night. We are planning to sneak out on Friday night, at like one in the morning, and go around bein' all romantic and shit. I can't fucking wait. Because, I mean:
A) Sneaking out is fun, period. Regardless of who you do it with.
B) There is that night 'high' you get, the one where you feel really energized and invincible.
C) I am an angst-filled adolescent, so my hormones are just totally fucked up all the time anyway.
D) There is the adrenaline rush of being "bad." Or sneaking, or whatever.
E) It's going to be with her. She completely fucks with the chemicals in my head. And I wouldn't have it any other way.
So... you add that all together, it's gonna be a fucking cocktail of pure, unadulterated excitement and happiness.
I. Can't. Wait.
Wish me luck TL.
I truly hope every single one of you guys finds someone who you love as much as I love Sophia. And that they reciprocate. Because, out of all my travels around the world, all my crazy unique experiences, nothing, NOTHING compares to this. I love you all. <3
 
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nice to see some girlblogs actually having some good results
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Girl blogs are my favourite. Did ya know? =P
5/5 thanks for the good read, ride your hormones to the natural flow, and always use protection!
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how could you let her confess first? Come on !! Your supposed to be the man. A hollow victory imo.
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Careful, young one. At this point in your life you have no idea what love is, though I'm completely nostalgic at the excitement and emotions.
Enjoy the rush, but don't let yourself get so carried away that in 3 months we have a super-emo broken heart girlblog
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On May 23 2012 23:30 sharky246 wrote:
how could you let her confess first? Come on !! Your supposed to be the man. A hollow victory imo.
Because he knows how to roll. <3
Half way in I was already like "kiss her... kiss her goddammit!!!11" ... Cool it turned out well, enjoy~ =)
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On May 23 2012 23:34 Crownlol wrote:Careful, young one. At this point in your life you have no idea what love is, though I'm completely nostalgic at the excitement and emotions. Enjoy the rush, but don't let yourself get so carried away that in 3 months we have a super-emo broken heart girlblog
Hey, look. I know you are going to say that to me with genuine concern, but... I am pretty sure. Very sure. I'm not one to rush into anything, nor to say anything of that magnitude without thoroughly thinking about it. I've been in fake love before, which was pretty much an obsession at best, and this is nothing like that. Nothing. I've spent a long time considering this, it wasn't like, "OH MY GOD SHE IS PRETTY AND SHE LIKES ME, I WUB HER!"
A lot of thought went into this. I wouldn't have told her otherwise. Which brings me to my next point...
On May 23 2012 23:30 sharky246 wrote:
how could you let her confess first? Come on !! Your supposed to be the man. A hollow victory imo.
Hey Sharky, how's it going? I actually did confess first. Like a week or so ago. I think that I fell for her before she fell for me, so it was just natural for things to progress that way. I'll (here's another promise for all of ya) write about it in another post, don't worry. Although I am sure you are not, haha. Why do you think it is better to 'confess,' as you say, first?
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Ah CyDe my maaan :-P, playin' dem girls like it's nothing!
Seriously though glad to see things going good for ya.
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Ah those were the days. Did you pop a boner when you snogged her? lol
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This is the only girl blog I gave a 5/5
Grats man! You are so lucky to have found her
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On May 23 2012 23:34 Crownlol wrote:Careful, young one. At this point in your life you have no idea what love is, though I'm completely nostalgic at the excitement and emotions. Enjoy the rush, but don't let yourself get so carried away that in 3 months we have a super-emo broken heart girlblog
If it was an adult speaking the way he does in his blog then sure maybe. But even you said you're nostalgic at the emotions and excitement! Adolescent love might not always be permanent but its still absolutely powerful.
I know us adults tend to say only our kind of love is real love, but is it really? I have huge respect for the lasting, enduring love that comes from commitment and trust but hey, sometimes teenagers just feel things stronger then us. And to be honest from this story it sounds like a whirlwind love but that isn't too say it won't last!
I guess what I'm trying to say is that maybe teenagers are completely incapable of adult love simply because they aren't adults. They are constantly evolving and changing as they grow so quickly and so developing a relationship over longterm trust, commitment and affection isn't possible. Instead they get to experience raging emotions, pure instinctive affection and hormones as the things that bind their affections, and who's to say that is less genuine or valid then what mature people experience? And when they come out the other end these relationships still do bear the fruits of lifelong marriages, a minority of times at least!
OP Grats on an amazing experience and good luck with this girl!
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CyDe you pulled it off, congratz! Hope you two have great things waiting in the future!
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it's fine to get *excited* when you're kissing.....it's all the intense emotions and feelings inside you that are making this happen
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On May 23 2012 23:57 solidbebe wrote:
Ah CyDe my maaan :-P, playin' dem girls like it's nothing!
Seriously though glad to see things going good for ya.
Aww hell yeah, thanks man. I totally pull off being 'cool' with dem girls. Or... girl. In my case.
On May 24 2012 00:10 Nallen wrote:
Ah those were the days. Did you pop a boner when you snogged her? lol
Check the spoiler :D
On May 24 2012 00:27 Incze wrote:
This is the only girl blog I gave a 5/5
Grats man! You are so lucky to have found her
:O I am honored. The hard part wasn't finding her, it was convincing myself I am worthy of such a lovely lady.
On May 24 2012 00:52 PiGStarcraft wrote:Show nested quote +On May 23 2012 23:34 Crownlol wrote:Careful, young one. At this point in your life you have no idea what love is, though I'm completely nostalgic at the excitement and emotions. Enjoy the rush, but don't let yourself get so carried away that in 3 months we have a super-emo broken heart girlblog If it was an adult speaking the way he does in his blog then sure maybe. But even you said you're nostalgic at the emotions and excitement! Adolescent love might not always be permanent but its still absolutely powerful. I know us adults tend to say only our kind of love is real love, but is it really? I have huge respect for the lasting, enduring love that comes from commitment and trust but hey, sometimes teenagers just feel things stronger then us. And to be honest from this story it sounds like a whirlwind love but that isn't too say it won't last! I guess what I'm trying to say is that maybe teenagers are completely incapable of adult love simply because they aren't adults. They are constantly evolving and changing as they grow so quickly and so developing a relationship over longterm trust, commitment and affection isn't possible. Instead they get to experience raging emotions, pure instinctive affection and hormones as the things that bind their affections, and who's to say that is less genuine or valid then what mature people experience? And when they come out the other end these relationships still do bear the fruits of lifelong marriages, a minority of times at least! OP Grats on an amazing experience and good luck with this girl!
Huh, thanks for the long response. I guess it is interesting, for the love that I am experiencing right now is probably not even remotely close to adult love, but you know it really is real, to me. It's different, from anything. What is adult love like, if you have any personal experience? I want to know for comparison and for future reference, I suppose. And thanks again for the luck and congratulations.
On May 24 2012 01:08 Cokefreak wrote:
CyDe you pulled it off, congratz! Hope you two have great things waiting in the future!
:D Thanks Coke, so do I.
On May 24 2012 02:01 natalia_shimanchuk wrote:it's fine to get *excited* when you're kissing.....it's all the intense emotions and feelings inside you that are making this happen
Yeah ahaha. It's rough and awesome at the same time. I do hope that it will... you know... not happen, so much, later on. It's intrusive. Pardon the minor pun.
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gotta turn that boner into an advantage, cmon now youngin'
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i think true love like in a long term relationship is actually a very mild feeling with stronger undertones
if u are still newly with a girl and u feel very very strongly and cant stop thinking about them then thats just puppy love or infatuation
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On May 24 2012 02:27 opsayo wrote:
i think true love like in a long term relationship is actually a very mild feeling with stronger undertones
if u are still newly with a girl and u feel very very strongly and cant stop thinking about them then thats just puppy love or infatuation
let the kid lose his virginity in peace, we all know it's not love.
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EPT
