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On Driving Near Pennsylvanians - Page 3

Blogs > tofucake
Post a Reply
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Dopeyabyss
Profile Joined April 2011
United States26 Posts
May 17 2012 13:32 GMT
#41
Just be glad you guys don't live in the Washington DC area. I lived just outside of DC for about 16 years and the traffic around there is just unbelievable, particularly on 495 (DC's Beltway) and I-95. Not only is there a tremendous volume of cars on the road at all times, but the general attitude of drivers is "fuck everyone else, I'm getting where I need to go NOW!" So you see shit all the time where people will, for example, sit at a traffic light in the left turn lane for several minutes, only to flip on their right turn signal and proceed to cut off EVERYONE in the other lanes to make a right hand turn when the light changes. I've almost been mushed by tractor trailers, I've had to swerve out of the way of a car going the wrong direction on 495, people just generally can't drive up there.

I moved away from the DC area a few years ago but most of my family still lives there, and I absolutely dread having to drive back up there to visit them. Not because I have any problem with my family, it's just I have to prepare myself mentally for the drive because I know I'm gonna see some wild shit and I'll have to be ready for anything. On the plus side, I learned to drive there. And if you can drive in DC, you can drive anywhere.
tofucake
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Hyrule19249 Posts
May 17 2012 14:18 GMT
#42
On May 17 2012 21:56 CaucasianAsian wrote:
I didn't know you could drive tofu.

I can. I'm amazing at it. Although it's hard to tell because I'm surrounded by idiots.
Liquipediaasante sana squash banana
Juggernaut477
Profile Joined May 2011
United States379 Posts
May 17 2012 14:47 GMT
#43
I live in PA and just got my permit and seem to be the best driver in the state. And yeah fuck everyone here.
tofucake
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Hyrule19249 Posts
May 17 2012 14:56 GMT
#44
On May 17 2012 23:47 Juggernaut477 wrote:
I live in PA and just got my permit and seem to be the best driver in the state. And yeah fuck everyone here.

While that may seem true, you are cursed by the fact that you live in PA. You will practice driving on amazingly terrible roads. Please learn the difference between Yield, Stop, and Merge; I beg you. Also, KEEP RIGHT EXCEPT TO PASS. It's state law in PA and NJ (but not DE because fuck those guys). Always. Seriously. Keep right. In fact, until you have 5 years of driving experience, just never try to pass anyone, stay entirely in the right lane unless it's closed for some reason.
Liquipediaasante sana squash banana
Torenhire
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States11681 Posts
May 17 2012 17:45 GMT
#45
On May 17 2012 22:32 Dopeyabyss wrote:
Just be glad you guys don't live in the Washington DC area. I lived just outside of DC for about 16 years and the traffic around there is just unbelievable, particularly on 495 (DC's Beltway) and I-95. Not only is there a tremendous volume of cars on the road at all times, but the general attitude of drivers is "fuck everyone else, I'm getting where I need to go NOW!" So you see shit all the time where people will, for example, sit at a traffic light in the left turn lane for several minutes, only to flip on their right turn signal and proceed to cut off EVERYONE in the other lanes to make a right hand turn when the light changes. I've almost been mushed by tractor trailers, I've had to swerve out of the way of a car going the wrong direction on 495, people just generally can't drive up there.

I moved away from the DC area a few years ago but most of my family still lives there, and I absolutely dread having to drive back up there to visit them. Not because I have any problem with my family, it's just I have to prepare myself mentally for the drive because I know I'm gonna see some wild shit and I'll have to be ready for anything. On the plus side, I learned to drive there. And if you can drive in DC, you can drive anywhere.


lol true stories. Especially if you can drive in DC and not die, you can drive anywhere.

I travel for work about twice a month to various other states, DC area is by far the worst. Take Tofucake's stories and multiply it by 4x as many people and gg. It's not uncommon here to have a three lane highway blocked (55mph speedlimit) and stuck going 30-35mph because three slow people are driving side by side going HUEHUEHUEHUE the whole time.

Pennsylvania drivers are probably 2nd, maybe 3rd on the list of shitfest drivers though. They are probably tied with NYC drivers but they are two different kinds of terrible drivers that it's hard to put one on top of the other. NJ isn't all that bad, though 90% of the time I am driving on NJ Turnpike or 95, you can generally get pretty zippy in there and a lot of people on the NJ Turnpike are good about the stay right thing.
SirJolt: Well maybe if you weren't so big and stupid, it wouldn't have hit you.
Durp
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Canada3117 Posts
May 17 2012 18:19 GMT
#46
Good read, though this sounds like pretty standard traffic that I deal with.

If you think i-95 is frustrating you've never been on the 401 (in Ontario) at rush hour. Imagine a 100kmh highway, in which an easy 40-50 km's of it have cars moving no faster than 40 km/h. Every weekday it's like this at rush hour. At least you can drive normally a little bit?

Sounds pretty road rage inducing.
SOOOOOooooOOOOooooOOOOoo Many BANELINGS!!
Serejai
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
6007 Posts
May 17 2012 20:20 GMT
#47
Tennessee is about the same. It's like as soon as you cross that state line everyone becomes an incompetent moron.

It's actually quite incredible... you'll see some signs like "No Littering", "Work Zone: Fines Doubles", "Speed Limit 45", "Stay in Lane", etc. There are no marked lines on the road, lanes are uneven, and there are concrete barriers 3 inches on the side of you due to construction. And yet everyone and their mother is doing 80+ through there.

Then you see some jackass driving 90+, throwing trash out the window, changing lanes like he's auditioning for the next Fast and Furious movie, and a girl with a sign reading "HELP ME!" is visible in the back window. A few seconds later a police car passes you and you're like "Thank god, that prick is going to be arrested now". The police car catches up, waves at the prick, and speeds off.

Nobody in that state can drive for shit and I'm convinced they don't even have to take a test or anything to get a license. Easily tops DC for shittiest place to drive. Jersey is a close #3.
I HAVE 5 TOAST POINTS
Serejai
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
6007 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-05-17 20:29:31
May 17 2012 20:28 GMT
#48
Completely unrelated... I saw some seemingly drunk guy on a motorcycle yesterday. Here is a drawing of his traffic pattern:

[image loading]

A) Red light. He drove up on the sidewalk, almost running over a pedestrian, then drove through two bushes before getting back on the road and almost being hit by the front car in the turning lane (light had now turned green for us).

B) Red light. He slows down but fails to stop at the light and instead zig zags through the intersection. Luckily there we no cars coming at the time.

C) He randomly drives into oncoming traffic for a second.

D) Red light. He once again fails to stop, only this time he's nearly ran over by a car in the middle. He stops, walks his bike backwards to the line, then floors it (still red light). I lost track of him after this.

Point is people are retards.
I HAVE 5 TOAST POINTS
JinDesu
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States3990 Posts
May 17 2012 20:55 GMT
#49
On May 18 2012 05:28 Serejai wrote:
Completely unrelated... I saw some seemingly drunk guy on a motorcycle yesterday. Here is a drawing of his traffic pattern:

[image loading]

A) Red light. He drove up on the sidewalk, almost running over a pedestrian, then drove through two bushes before getting back on the road and almost being hit by the front car in the turning lane (light had now turned green for us).

B) Red light. He slows down but fails to stop at the light and instead zig zags through the intersection. Luckily there we no cars coming at the time.

C) He randomly drives into oncoming traffic for a second.

D) Red light. He once again fails to stop, only this time he's nearly ran over by a car in the middle. He stops, walks his bike backwards to the line, then floors it (still red light). I lost track of him after this.

Point is people are retards.


I love you.
Yargh
wei2coolman
Profile Joined November 2010
United States60033 Posts
May 17 2012 21:32 GMT
#50
Man that blows, but you don't know bad drivers until you've driven in southern california.
liftlift > tsm
opisska
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Poland8852 Posts
May 17 2012 21:45 GMT
#51
Before you start topping each other for the worst drivers in the world, you should try something spicier. I have never been tgo southeastern Asia, but I heard stories. I was only a pedestrian in Egypt, but I can't even imagine to drive there for more than ten seconds without a crash (yet, there are almost no accidents at all, the traffic is only stupid, not too dangerous). But I get sometimes to drive in Argentina and the more educated people over there are sersiously scared about driving in their own country - and I can very much understand why....

In a global perspecive, US drivers are very nice
"Jeez, that's far from ideal." - Serral, the king of mild trashtalk
TL+ Member
StarBrift
Profile Joined January 2008
Sweden1761 Posts
May 17 2012 23:35 GMT
#52
We get this in sweden too. The ammount of traffic caused by stupid people with empty pointless lives that have to stop and look at something completely mundane just because it's out of the ordinary.
MountainDewJunkie
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States10346 Posts
May 18 2012 01:02 GMT
#53
Don't forget PA is filled with old-fucks who are awful drivers and are delaying death to their maximum ability.

Here in WA, have phases, a cycle, if you will, of how to drive on the interstate:
But first, some constants:
- on the whole, the left lane IS actually properly used as the passing lane, and the right lane usually the slowest
- on the whole, the average speeds is about 5 over.
- if there is a single cop on the road, EVERYONE EVERYONE EVERYONE slows down to 5 under for no reason, and I say no reason because 1) the cop has someone pulled over already and 2) cops clock you with their radar gun long before you can spot them and slow down

Anyway, the cycle:
- early morning, you can beat the to-Seattle/Renton traffic, people are usually going 5 to 10 over if they can. One asshole on a crotchrocket or bike weaves recklessly through traffic, often never making it more than a few car-lengths ahead
- morning (7 or later), the to-SEA/REN traffic crawls as you approach your destination. Random spurts of speedup, then long drawls of 2 mph. Carpool laners going about 65 and laughing their asses off
- pre-noon, people are usually at work, or at school, flow of traffic is fine, still lots and lots of cars, but most people going 65.
- 2:30 to 4, first and second waves of Boeing/industrial traffic make I-5 north a hell on Earth. Lot's of people using exit only lanes to cut off rolling traffic, Highway 2 exit traffic, lots of futile weaving, Murphy's Law, and so on. But if you're going towards Seattle from the North, the freeway is completely vacant, people are flying.
- 5:30 to 6:30, thick traffic heading towards SEA, occasional slowdowns especially closer to downtown, but not bad. Traffic going north still a bit beefy.
- "darkening," pre-10pm, people are flying, suddenly not going 70 or faster is a social crime. Tailgating, illegal use of carpool lane, high-beamers, honkers, a lot of very important people it seems.
- night, 10pm to 2am, everyone is going about 5 under, out of fear of being drunk, fear or state patrol, or perhaps out of simply being drunk themselves. People get really paranoid these hours. Traffic is thin enough where I stay in the passing lane and leave all these grandma's in the dust. I go 5 over everywhere if I can, regardless of time of day. At least I'm consistent.
- 2am to 4am, a good time to not be on the road. City cops, deputies, and patrol everywhere, and the only people driving are usually drunk or tired, so about as good as drunk. Roads are clear, but for good reason.

I feel a little better reading some of your complaints. I guess it's at least worse somewhere else

PS, the more expensive the car, the bigger the asshole. An exception to the rule is the penis-compensator F-350/Titan/Ram3500. Oh, and shitty '90s civic rice cannons.
[21:07] <Shock710> whats wrong with her face [20:50] <dAPhREAk> i beat it the day after it came out | <BLinD-RawR> esports is a giant vagina
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States46306 Posts
May 18 2012 01:43 GMT
#54
On May 18 2012 05:55 JinDesu wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 18 2012 05:28 Serejai wrote:
Completely unrelated... I saw some seemingly drunk guy on a motorcycle yesterday. Here is a drawing of his traffic pattern:

[image loading]

A) Red light. He drove up on the sidewalk, almost running over a pedestrian, then drove through two bushes before getting back on the road and almost being hit by the front car in the turning lane (light had now turned green for us).

B) Red light. He slows down but fails to stop at the light and instead zig zags through the intersection. Luckily there we no cars coming at the time.

C) He randomly drives into oncoming traffic for a second.

D) Red light. He once again fails to stop, only this time he's nearly ran over by a car in the middle. He stops, walks his bike backwards to the line, then floors it (still red light). I lost track of him after this.

Point is people are retards.


I love you.


Dude that's nothing. Today I was driving and pulled up to a red light, and a biker just casually drove through it a few seconds after I was stopped, as if it were as green as the Hulk's ass. Didn't even look into the intersection before cruising through. Fortunately, no cars were passing at the time.

Here's an in-depth sketch of what happened:

[image loading]

Do they even have laws to follow? Seriously, fuck motorcyclists.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
JingleHell
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States11308 Posts
May 18 2012 02:35 GMT
#55
Heh. This reminds me yet again of why I love my truck, and hate my wife's car. Very few dumbasses fuck with my truck in traffic. It DOES happen, but it's rare.

If it's any consolation, I have yet to find the state where people don't drive like this. Except Iowa and Nebraska. Actually, I assume the 6 people who live in those states still find ways to drive like this, I just haven't seen it happen because they were all busy hanging out at Iowa's #1 tourist attraction, the biggest truck stop in the country.

(You wish I was kidding.)
s0Li
Profile Joined September 2010
United States406 Posts
May 18 2012 03:04 GMT
#56
Shoulda told those dick fucks to get out the way....

Just sayin


P.S. can we be friends?
I don't wanna hear excuses, I wanna hear solutions...
Sinensis
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States2513 Posts
May 18 2012 03:17 GMT
#57
I live in a part of Florida that is dense with elderly people. I see people driving for long distances in the wrong lane once a week... you have to keep your eyes peeled because one of them could be coming right at you at any moment.
DivinO
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States4796 Posts
May 18 2012 05:01 GMT
#58
I'm a Pennsylvania Driver.

Sorry.
LiquipediaBrain in my filth.
tofucake
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Hyrule19249 Posts
May 18 2012 07:16 GMT
#59
On May 18 2012 11:35 JingleHell wrote:
Heh. This reminds me yet again of why I love my truck, and hate my wife's car. Very few dumbasses fuck with my truck in traffic. It DOES happen, but it's rare.

If it's any consolation, I have yet to find the state where people don't drive like this. Except Iowa and Nebraska. Actually, I assume the 6 people who live in those states still find ways to drive like this, I just haven't seen it happen because they were all busy hanging out at Iowa's #1 tourist attraction, the biggest truck stop in the country.

(You wish I was kidding.)

I will fuck with a pickup no problem, as long as I actually have right of way. You guys don't want people crashing into your truck any more than someone in a compact wants someone crashing into their car.
Liquipediaasante sana squash banana
tofucake
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Hyrule19249 Posts
May 18 2012 07:17 GMT
#60
On May 18 2012 14:01 DivinO wrote:
I'm a Pennsylvania Driver.

Sorry.

It's okay. I offer driving lessons; $19.99 per one hour session. It's called Driving with tofu: A complete course on how to not fail at driving and life in general
Liquipediaasante sana squash banana
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