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Having a child

Blogs > achristes
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1 2 3 Next All
achristes
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Norway653 Posts
December 21 2011 17:04 GMT
#1
Aparently I never learn my lesson of not posting sensitive questions on the internet, but here we go anyway...

(Note that the question was about teen pregnancy)
So I read this hard viewpoint question in our english book a few days ago, and it was something like;
If a girl gets pregnant (not intentional), and the guy doesn't want to keep the baby but the girl decides to keep it anyway, should the guy then be tied down the next 18 years of his life because of bad luck (IE, the condom broke etc) because the mother doesn't want to abort or give it away?

IMO this is a really hard question, as I can see the why the mother wouldn't want to abort or something like that. But I can also see things from the guys point of view, that maybe this was a "One-night stand gone wrong" and he has to drop out of school or something like that to get a not so well-paid job to support the mother and child.

I thought this could be a good topic to discuss, as the western world has alot of teenage pregnancy and I was just wondering what other people would think about this.

As always, try to keep the discussion civilized

PS
If you think that I meant anything offensive, I probably didn't. I have the NaNiwa syndrome of not being able to express my opinions the right way, if you know what I mean.

youtube.com/spooderm4n | twitch.tv/spooderm4n | Random videos and games I feel like uploading
solidbebe
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Netherlands4921 Posts
December 21 2011 17:16 GMT
#2
I think the guy should not be obligated to be there as a dad for the kid, and the mother is really REALLY dumb she wants to keep the baby. I only think this though if the condom broke or something like that, if the guy just had unprotected sex with her then he's an idiot and is responsible for his actions.
That's the 2nd time in a week I've seen someone sig a quote from this GD and I have never witnessed a sig quote happen in my TL history ever before. -Najda
Terranist
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States2496 Posts
December 21 2011 17:19 GMT
#3
morally speaking the man should be obligated to support the child even if it means sacrificing his future, but that doesn't always happen in the real world.
The Show of a Lifetime
AirbladeOrange
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States2573 Posts
December 21 2011 17:19 GMT
#4
It's not always the case a guy is "tied down for the next 18 years of his life" after he fathers a child. You don't have to marry the woman or move in with her or anything. However, if she wants you to be financially responsible you do have to pay child support, at least in the U.S.. I think if the mother chooses to keep the baby even against the father's wishes, the father should still have financial obligations because he still had a part in the matter.
mucker
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States1120 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-12-21 17:20:37
December 21 2011 17:20 GMT
#5
I don't think it is a hard question at all. When you choose to do something you must take full responsibility for the outcome whether or not everything goes the way you wanted it do. This applies to all facets of life.
It's supposed to be automatic but actually you have to press this button.
MadNeSs
Profile Joined March 2007
Denmark1507 Posts
December 21 2011 17:22 GMT
#6
What about, if the guy want to keep the child, and she doesnt? Should she be able to just get an abortion, because its her child?

Also why the fuck would we be offended by this? wtf man!?
Myles
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States5162 Posts
December 21 2011 17:22 GMT
#7
I think it's an impossible thing to get right.

It's wrong to force a guy to pay for a child based on an honest mistake. It's also wrong for a guy to go around impregnating girls without worry of the consequences. It's also wrong to let a child grow up in squalor.

All in all, people need to stop being so dumb about sex.
Moderator
achristes
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Norway653 Posts
December 21 2011 17:28 GMT
#8
Also why the fuck would we be offended by this? wtf man!?

I don't know, because you misunderstood what I meant because I'm pretty awful when it comes to expressing my own opinions?
youtube.com/spooderm4n | twitch.tv/spooderm4n | Random videos and games I feel like uploading
MadNeSs
Profile Joined March 2007
Denmark1507 Posts
December 21 2011 17:30 GMT
#9
You tell me?
TiTanIum_
Profile Joined August 2011
Brazil1335 Posts
December 21 2011 17:32 GMT
#10
"With great power comes great responsibilities." Batman.

If he got the girl pregnant, it is his fault. Use a better condom, learn to put it, give the girl a day after pill, teach your boys to swim backwards, I don´t care. Deal with it.
kethers
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States719 Posts
December 21 2011 17:32 GMT
#11
It may be a mistake, but when you have intercourse with someone, you assume the risks and responsibilities. You are the product of your own actions.

That would be like getting into a car accident and suing your car maker...it doesn't make sense.
(if you want to nitpick, yeah, it has happened, but unless the car maker actually makes the car faulty, they have no liability.)
Terranist
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States2496 Posts
December 21 2011 17:33 GMT
#12
On December 22 2011 02:32 TiTanIum_ wrote:
"With great power comes great responsibilities." Batman.

If he got the girl pregnant, it is his fault. Use a better condom, learn to put it, give the girl a day after pill, teach your boys to swim backwards, I don´t care. Deal with it.


did you even read the OP? you're totally off the mark.
The Show of a Lifetime
ShatterZer0
Profile Joined November 2010
United States1843 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-12-21 17:37:33
December 21 2011 17:34 GMT
#13
Take responsibility for one's accidents is considered part of being an adult. A human being's life is worth more than one's free time.

EDIT: It also REALLY benches on what "being a Father" means. If it means having a 9-5 and going to night school, then it shouldn't be a problem of ethics should it? Then again, if the mother and father's physical well being are put in danger then an argument could be made. I assume this is suburban teenagers, so the second case is not likely the case you were thinking about.
A time to live.
In)Spire
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States1323 Posts
December 21 2011 17:36 GMT
#14
I see it as both parties consented to having sex. They BOTH know of the possibility of pregnancy but took the risk anyways. He should take responsibility for his actions.
Grumbels
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Netherlands7031 Posts
December 21 2011 17:36 GMT
#15
On December 22 2011 02:22 Myles wrote:
I think it's an impossible thing to get right.

It's wrong to force a guy to pay for a child based on an honest mistake. It's also wrong for a guy to go around impregnating girls without worry of the consequences. It's also wrong to let a child grow up in squalor.

All in all, people need to stop being so dumb about sex.

If you're concerned about a guy having to pay for his 'honest mistake', then where's your sympathy for the girl who would have to raise a child with only herself supporting it? Or the child without a father?
Well, now I tell you, I never seen good come o' goodness yet. Him as strikes first is my fancy; dead men don't bite; them's my views--amen, so be it.
Kralic
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada2628 Posts
December 21 2011 17:39 GMT
#16
What class is this for? That will sway my answer a bit.
Brood War forever!
Myles
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States5162 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-12-21 17:44:09
December 21 2011 17:43 GMT
#17
On December 22 2011 02:36 Grumbels wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 22 2011 02:22 Myles wrote:
I think it's an impossible thing to get right.

It's wrong to force a guy to pay for a child based on an honest mistake. It's also wrong for a guy to go around impregnating girls without worry of the consequences. It's also wrong to let a child grow up in squalor.

All in all, people need to stop being so dumb about sex.

If you're concerned about a guy having to pay for his 'honest mistake', then where's your sympathy for the girl who would have to raise a child with only herself supporting it? Or the child without a father?

While I never directly said it, it's implied through the second sentence. I also think it's kind of ironic that guys seem to hold all the responsibility in the situation. The girl also decided to have sex and take on the potential consequences. The fact that there are alternatives to having the child is where a lot of complications are involved, too.
Moderator
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44109 Posts
December 21 2011 17:45 GMT
#18
When you have sex, you're always banking on the severe improbability of getting pregnant when you use contraception...

But only abstinence is 100% effective, so keep that in mind. If you get the girl pregant, you better man the fuck up and be prepared to deal with raising a child. It's your own damn fault.

Simple as that
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
THE_DOMINATOR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States309 Posts
December 21 2011 17:45 GMT
#19
On December 22 2011 02:20 mucker wrote:
I don't think it is a hard question at all. When you choose to do something you must take full responsibility for the outcome whether or not everything goes the way you wanted it do. This applies to all facets of life.

this.

User was warned for this post
DOMINATION
nttea
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
Sweden4353 Posts
December 21 2011 17:46 GMT
#20
Sadly as much as it sucks that a man can get forced into being the father of a child he doesn't want while a woman always have the option of abortion, there really is no better alternative. You can't force an abortion upon a woman and a child always have the right to know who is father is when possible.
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