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So I thought I'd write about something that's been bothering me for a LONG TIME now.
Here's a little background on myself that's relevant to the subject, I'm 17 years old, I'm a student of Piano and Guitar of 10 years, I've worked commission as a graphic artist, I'm a fledgling electronic music producer and I've had writing of mine published in magazines and books.
Now, if this next part confuses you, don't worry, because it confuses me too.
This is kind of an abstract subject so I'm not sure where to start, but basically, I pretty much have a lot of trouble expressing myself creatively, be it Art, Music, Writing, everything.
See, the thing is, 90% of the time, I'm sitting here with a complete block. Some days, I can sit there for 8 hours and be eternally unhappy with whatever it is I'm working on. Yesterday on my school vacation I was trying to come up with a lead for a song I've been working on, and sat there for 12 hours with absolutely nothing to show with it except a bunch of crap. These kinds of spells go on for weeks and even months at a time, no matter what the subject is.
The other 10% of the time, I have absolutely no trouble coming up with material. I enter a sort of 'trance' like state, completely focused on whatever I'm working on, be it literature, art, or music. These trances can last anywhere from hours to several days, stopped only by necessity or obstruction. I just feel so 'right' and open when I'm there. Naturally, these are so infrequent that its often an obstruction to any creative process I have.
When I finally reach the point in expression where I can come up with creative material, and that point passes me, when I come back later all too often I view my material as an outsider looking in. I can't look at what I write and say I wrote it as it seems so foreign to me in my current state that It would be inconceivable for me to have that level of intelligence. I could be playing a piece of music at concert level one day, but the next I can't even get past the first stanza.
I've always wanted to be involved in some kind of career path that would let me express my inner personality, but I can't help but fear my inconsistency would make it impossible to be reliable in any kind of paid position. I see people all around me who have the ability to do what I do at my best, every day. I know that I have the ability to perform on the same level, but these mental blocks I have are just incredibly annoying to deal with.
Anyways, I'm not really sure what I expected to get out of writing this. I just wanted to get my ideas out to see if other people have the same issues I have.
 
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ur life sounds exactly like alicia keys's life, she started playing piano at 7 and she was valedictorian of her hs and dropped out of columbia university 2 be a musician and sold 12 million copies and won 5 grammy awards. oh and she never had the block creative problem u had. so ok maybe ur nothing like alicia keys.
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Sounds like you might be a bit manic-depressive. Many famous artists were. It just means you need to ride those waves of creativity and find something else to do with your time when you are not feeling creative (like SC lol). I don't think you need to seek help for it or anything, just learn to harness your most productive periods.
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On November 04 2010 12:04 baller wrote:
ur life sounds exactly like alicia keys's life, she started playing piano at 7 and she was valedictorian of her hs and dropped out of columbia university 2 be a musician and sold 12 million copies and won 5 grammy awards. oh and she never had the block creative problem u had. so ok maybe ur nothing like alicia keys.
Nonetheless, I'm honored to get a baller post.
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lol baller
5/5 just because you got a baller post. 
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jammin with different people and listening to new music helps me unblock my creative blocks and dont stress about it just let your mind be free be one with your instrument start playing and dont stop dont judge what you are playing just play until you are in a trance until you are one with the music, let things just flow and they will be and things will appear.
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This is actually a pretty common phenomenon amongst creative artists. The truth is that no one is ever creatively "on" 100% of the time - according to some you spend 20% of your time to produce 80% of your work. Some solutions:
1. Produce in quantity, not quality. Force yourself to produce on a regular basis and learn from yourself in the process.
2. Ask other people on what you HAVE produced. Often your critical judgment will be much harsher than the average person. Especially ask someone better than you - like a teacher or mentor.
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Ahh, I get exactly the same thing when I'm thinking about a new idea, especially in my research. I get an idea in my head and start writing things down, and ideas/connections start pouring out faster than I can write them. This tends to happen when I start thinking down a path I haven't thought down before, and then 100% of my attention is devoted to it to the point where I am no longer perceiving my surroundings. Sometimes I then spend the next few days/weeks fine tuning the ideas and they turn into something somewhat interesting, or they turn out to be useless. Either way it's a cool feeling.
You said this type of thing only occurs for you about 10% of the time. For me, and probably you, this 10% of the time is when you happen to think if something new or particularly interesting, and then you do the "easy work" of further exploring which is your "trance". Sort of like shining a light into a room you've never seen before in a world that consists of mostly walls. Finding the room is the hard part, and Illuminating the rest of the room is the easy part.
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On November 04 2010 12:46 AcrossFiveJulys wrote:
You said this type of thing only occurs for you about 10% of the time. For me, and probably you, this 10% of the time is when you happen to think if something new or particularly interesting, and then you do the "easy work" of further exploring which is your "trance". Sort of like shining a light into a room you've never seen before in a world that consists of mostly walls. Finding the room is the hard part, and Illuminating the rest of the room is the easy part.
Sounds a bit like minesweeper lol
I find the same thing, just gotta force myself into the habit of writing and some days I will be switched on. Just focus on producing quantity, get feedback/mentoring and the quality will come with time and experience.
Baller posts always make my day :D
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5/5 baller makes threads baller.
Edit: Dunno if I can post this but, have you tried cannabis? Maybe letting your mind open up the great proportioning valve might do it some good.
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If you want consistency then make sure you have a consistent lifestyle. It's as simple as that; just make sure you switch up the consistency and perspectives once in a while, or you may find yourself decaying into a repetitive rut.
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EPT
