EPTOver the passed year shes:
- moved on
- moved in with a new boyfriend.
I've:
- gained about 30 pounds
- grown a double chin
- moved into a bus rv outside of my parents house(my dad calls it "failure to launch")
- won 24 cans of monster energy drink from Starcraft 2 CEVO(yay)
Ive got 2 weeks to look like less of a fat slob. So far every day since I heard of her arrival I've been going for runs.
I need help! I've thought of
1. Do some crazy 2 week work out and diet.
2. Wear lots of heavy clothes to conceal my new round figure.
3. Pay my pretty lady friends to pretend they are my girlfriends.
4.Pretend I won't be home for the week and hide in my bus.
5. Download and install WOW to drown my sorrows.
Any advice, words of encouragement, or even negative trolling is appreciated.
edit: epic movie trailer by BroOd
On June 26 2010 04:57 BroOd wrote:
I wrote the trailer to your movie
INT. PARENT’S HOUSE – DAY
Dad frowns as CheAse rifles through the fridge in his underwear
CheAse lugs the armful of snacks out the front door to his trailer home
INT. GIRL’S DORM – NIGHT
On phone:
INT. GYM – DAY
CheAse hits the gym, falls off the treadmill in exhaustion and flops onto the ground. Two attractive girls walk past, giggling.
EXT. NIGHT – GIRLFRIEND’S HOUSE
As it rains:
Amber looks out the window, crying, before slowly closing the curtain. CheAse falls to his knees.
EXT. CHEASE’S TRAILER
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY
CheAse speeds along the highway, airdrumming to AC/DC’s highway to hell
INT. CHURCH – DAY
Amber and Bruce stand at the altar, smiling, when CheAse busts through the door.
Congregation gasps.
I wrote the trailer to your movie
INT. PARENT’S HOUSE – DAY
VO
Meet CheAse. His life isn’t going exactly as planned
Meet CheAse. His life isn’t going exactly as planned
Dad frowns as CheAse rifles through the fridge in his underwear
DAD
This isn’t just a failure to launch,
it’s like the god-damned Challenger explosion all over again.
CHEASE
(with a mouthful of food)
Get off my case, Dad
This isn’t just a failure to launch,
it’s like the god-damned Challenger explosion all over again.
CHEASE
(with a mouthful of food)
Get off my case, Dad
CheAse lugs the armful of snacks out the front door to his trailer home
VO
But this summer, he’s going to get one
more chance with the girl who got away
But this summer, he’s going to get one
more chance with the girl who got away
INT. GIRL’S DORM – NIGHT
On phone:
GIRLFRIEND
Yeah, I’m coming home over break, I’d
really like to see you again. You know, to
catch up. We’ll always be friends, right?
Yeah, I’m coming home over break, I’d
really like to see you again. You know, to
catch up. We’ll always be friends, right?
VO
Now CheAse has two weeks to go from
zero… to Hero.
Now CheAse has two weeks to go from
zero… to Hero.
INT. GYM – DAY
CheAse hits the gym, falls off the treadmill in exhaustion and flops onto the ground. Two attractive girls walk past, giggling.
CheAse
I, uh, dropped a contact
I, uh, dropped a contact
VO
But sometimes it’s not about what you
look like, it’s about who you are inside
But sometimes it’s not about what you
look like, it’s about who you are inside
EXT. NIGHT – GIRLFRIEND’S HOUSE
As it rains:
CheAse
But Amber, I love you!
But Amber, I love you!
Amber looks out the window, crying, before slowly closing the curtain. CheAse falls to his knees.
CheAse
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
VO
This summer, learn to fall in love
all over again…
This summer, learn to fall in love
all over again…
EXT. CHEASE’S TRAILER
LARRY
Look CheAse, you’re my best friend, but
this is crazy! What do you think is gonna
happen? She doesn’t love you anymore.
CheAse
You’re wrong. She does love me, and I’m
going to prove it, no matter what.
Larry
She’s getting married in two days, cross
country. You’ll never make it man. Face
it, you’re going to be a lonely internet slob
forever.
CheAse
You’re wrong. You’re all wrong!
Look CheAse, you’re my best friend, but
this is crazy! What do you think is gonna
happen? She doesn’t love you anymore.
CheAse
You’re wrong. She does love me, and I’m
going to prove it, no matter what.
Larry
She’s getting married in two days, cross
country. You’ll never make it man. Face
it, you’re going to be a lonely internet slob
forever.
CheAse
You’re wrong. You’re all wrong!
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY
CheAse speeds along the highway, airdrumming to AC/DC’s highway to hell
INT. CHURCH – DAY
Amber and Bruce stand at the altar, smiling, when CheAse busts through the door.
CheAse
I OBJECT!
I OBJECT!
Congregation gasps.
VO
Jonah Hill, Ellen Page with Christopher Walken
and Tracy Morgan in, “Home Is Where the CheAse Is”
Jonah Hill, Ellen Page with Christopher Walken
and Tracy Morgan in, “Home Is Where the CheAse Is”
