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[Story] Probe 4's Bizarre Adventures

Blogs > noobilly
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noobilly
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Malaysia16 Posts
March 17 2010 15:09 GMT
#1
The probes were lined up neatly in front of the nexus, waiting for the 5 second countdown for the game to start.

"I was a SCV the last game," said Probe 1, the first from the left. "I was one of the bravest workers on the field," he said with a proud look on his face. "I stood in the field of battle, repairing tanks and goliaths while the zerg swarm raged all around me." The other probes stared at him with admiring eyes.

Probe 2 nodded. "I was a SCV as well, I didn't go into the field, but I weathered three minutes of zerg flyers tearing through my base and repaired turrets right and left. Ah, the brave marines who fell beside me." He wanted to bow his head, but all he could manage was a slight dip as probes had no necks.

Probe 3 said: "I was a drone last game. I spent twenty minutes gathering minerals, but near the end I turned into a little building which could channel our forces through, and ten ultralisks went through me to save our base and take down the shiny Protoss attackers."

Probe 4 remained quiet. "What did you do last game?" The other three asked in unison.

"I was just a probe." He replied. The others laughed uproariously. "Probes have the most boring life! Gather and gather, and no chance for anything greater. Ah well, we all had our glory days, apart from you."

He did not know what to say. Just then the game started, and they moved off immediately to the minerals. He moved towards the same mineral patch as Probe 1, who rudely bumped him aside and growled out of the corner of his mouth: "Move over, kid".

With a heavy heart, he began the hard work of mining. After a while, he was called away from the minerals by the commander.

"Go to the enemy base," the commander told him. The other probes smirked at him. "You are going to die first with no battle glory!" Probe 2 shouted at him.

He floated along across the badlands, not pausing to look at the occasional animal by the way. After a few seconds, he came to a slope leading up a cliff and was told to go up there, into the darkness which lay above.

"I wonder what is up there?" Probe 4 thought to himself.

At the top, he saw a bunch of Terran buildings and workers scurrying around. Right at the edge of the slope were two workers frantically moving around two unfinished-looking buildings.

"Hello," he said to one of them.

"Go away, can't you see I'm busy?" The irritated worker fired back.

"Your building is already called in, what are you doing circling around it for?" Probe 4 was curious. The Terran worker did not even bother to reply, so the probe poked him with the beam he used for mining.

"OW!" the worker shouted. Almost immediately, another worker came cruising over from the mineral lines, fusion cutter in hand. "No one messes with my brotha!" the newcomer shouted.

Feeling it unwise to engage the larger worker in a fight, Probe 4 began running. He cruised around the base with the worker hot on his heels. Just as he went past the mineral line, he heard the commander speaking to him.

"Build a pylon there." And he did so. The Terran workers now had to circle past the glowing warp, and they complained loudly to each other, hurling curses his way. He began to smile to himself. Seeing another chance, he planted yet another pylon, trapping another two workers behind it. They turned and began to hit the pylon, but to little avail.

Probe 4 was feeling very happy now. Receiving a third command, he opened another warp behind the pylons as he was trained to in the nexus.

Suddenly, he saw a new face in front of him. A ugly creature clad in armor blocked his way. It raised a stubby black tube and pointed the tube at him. He felt his shield being pounded.

"Ouch! It hurts!" He banked and immediately started running, with both the Terran worker and the new enemy chasing.

Just when he felt there was no hope, he saw the enemy spin around and start shooting at a new target, a zealot. The zealot did not bother avoiding, simply walking up to the armor-clad creature. A couple swipes of his blue blades and the creature was no more. The zealot walked up to Probe 4 and patted his shoulder. "Good job," he said tersely before walking into the mineral line of the enemy, blades out.

Huge words appeared in the sky at that moment.

"NOOB PROTOSS!"

Then Probe 4's whole world went black.

When he woke up, he was standing in front of a nexus again, this time with five other probes. He told them his story and they hung onto every word, entranced with his bravery.

"Oh well, I've had my glory, I suppose I can settle down to mine resources this round."

Then a voice came from within the nexus.

"Have you heard of warpgates?"




****
I don't buy souls. How can anyone even own a soul? - Lucifer Morningstar
win8282
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Korea (South)454 Posts
March 17 2010 15:19 GMT
#2
Almost sounds like an aesop fable XD
alffla
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Hong Kong20321 Posts
March 17 2010 15:19 GMT
#3
lmao huge neon green words from the sky? rofl

lol warpgates.. i guess the probe has to go proxy a pylon now? haha
Graphicssavior[gm] : What is a “yawn” rape ;; Masumune - It was the year of the pig for those fucking defilers. Chill - A clinic you say? okum: SC without Korean yelling is like porn without sex. konamix: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!
Scorch
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Austria3371 Posts
March 17 2010 15:22 GMT
#4
Proberto!
Hyde
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Australia14568 Posts
March 17 2010 15:23 GMT
#5
Haha I enjoyed reading this, I thought the dipping because they had no necks was cute haha.
You know the next time I play I'm going to remember this and I'm going to laugh.

Huge words appeared in the sky at that moment.

"NOOB PROTOSS!"

Ahahaha
Because when you left, Brood War was all spotlights and titans. Now, with the death of the big leagues, Brood War has moved to the basements and carparks. Now, Brood War is unlicensed brawls, lost teeth, and bloody fights for fistfulls of money - SirJolt
Antimage
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada1293 Posts
March 17 2010 15:26 GMT
#6
lol excellent blog :D
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
March 17 2010 15:27 GMT
#7
NOOB PROTOSS
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
meteorskunk
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada546 Posts
March 17 2010 15:44 GMT
#8
Let me guess. You played a pvt while not sober??
Girl Blog Credentials: Comfortable talking to some women. Tried the sex once
RandomAbuse
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
187 Posts
March 17 2010 15:57 GMT
#9
Lol awesome. 5 Stars
Kawatan wrote: "Defilers are mid units".
KingofHearts
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Japan562 Posts
March 17 2010 16:03 GMT
#10
7 stars
moshi moshi~
petered
Profile Joined February 2010
United States1817 Posts
March 17 2010 16:24 GMT
#11
Love these stories.
This, my friends, is the power of the Shikyo Memorial for QQ therapy thread. We make the world a better place, one chainsaw massacre prevention at a time.
jonnyp
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States415 Posts
March 17 2010 16:51 GMT
#12
Great story 5/5
The number of years it takes for the Internet to move past anything is way, way over 9000.
Kazius
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Israel1456 Posts
March 17 2010 17:10 GMT
#13
hehehe, awesome :D
Friendship is like peeing yourself. Anyone can see it, but only you get that warm feeling.
Licmyobelisk
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Philippines3682 Posts
March 17 2010 17:14 GMT
#14
good story ^_^
I don't think I've ever wished my opponent good luck prior to a game. When I play, I play to win. I hope every opponent I ever have is cursed with fucking terrible luck. I hope they're stuck playing underneath a stepladder with a black cat in attendance a
Shiladie
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Canada1631 Posts
March 17 2010 17:22 GMT
#15
lol, the life and times of our workers...
da_head
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Canada3350 Posts
March 17 2010 17:27 GMT
#16
xD 5/5
When they see MC Probe, all the ladies disrobe.
Sauron
Profile Joined November 2008
Romania169 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-03-17 17:58:52
March 17 2010 17:57 GMT
#17
5/5 Beautiful story. You are inspiring me to cheese more in pvt ^^
I <3 probes
Soothsayer
FragKrag
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States11567 Posts
March 17 2010 18:11 GMT
#18
haha 5/5

cute little story, but fuck protoss ;;
*TL CJ Entusman #40* "like scissors does anything to paper except MAKE IT MORE NUMEROUS" -paper
tirentu
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Canada1257 Posts
March 17 2010 18:14 GMT
#19
5/5
I hate Protoss.
johnnyspazz
Profile Joined April 2009
Taiwan1470 Posts
March 17 2010 18:23 GMT
#20
haha great story
i <3 protoss
"The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less." -Brendan Behan
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