There's a F'ing BAT in my house

WheelOfTime

Canada331 Posts

February 16 2010 02:40 GMT

Okay, story goes.

No fuck that, not story.

Truth goes...

I'm living at a student house, everyone went home for reading week because they're students, but I'm on co-op working so I can't go home. I'm all alone in this 7 bedroom house, and one of the bedrooms has a balcony so that's where I usually go to for a smoke.

So I felt the urge to take a drag, went out onto the balcony and did I had to do; poison my lungs with delicious fumes.

I came back to my own room, chatted on phone with my GF, drank a feel beers because it's Chinese New Year and I'm lonely, and felt like smoking another one.

So I took my super ultra cool and hip zippo lighter and my pack, went to the 3rd floor, and opened the bedroom door with the balcony ready to plunge into orsum hedonism pleasures. But, what I did not, expect, was the fact that

A BAT. A fucking BAT, flew at me.

All these years of super ultra cool and hip Starcraft reaction time taught me well.

I threw my zippo lighter at it, hit it nicely like a well-placed fucking nuke in tvz, and slammed the door on it faster than that time when I tried to hit on a really hawt friend of mine, female.

Now I can hear it going fucking crazy in that bedroom.

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

DO I DO.

I have this huge fear of spiders, rats, and snakes. Nothing else, I like all other insects and mammals and reptiles, I mean, I ate fucking scorpions as a delicacy on my trip in China this summer. It's just... I can't deal with fucking spiders, snakes, and fucking RATS.

If you think about it, a fucking bat is just a giant fuck-off rat with WINGS.

That's like, giving fucking ultralisks the ability to fucking FLY> Imagine how fucking imba that would be, fucking mini-recall ultras in your min lines. What the fuck indeed.

I'm not scared or anything, cuz there's a huge ginormousous door keeping me safe.

But, I am at a loss as to my next step.

Do I:

A - A-move into the room with my beer bottles

B - Do nothing and wait for it to run out of minerals in a few days

C - Call my GF and cry.

Woooo nice

D - Jack off, "Maria Ozawa Sky Dark Angel.mp4" just finished downloading.

You decide.

Edit: Amidst of the excitement, I didn't realize it bit / scratch me. Now I'm worried. I don't like rabies.

Anyway, pics:

+ Show Spoiler +

+ Show Spoiler +

JohnColtrane

Australia4813 Posts

February 16 2010 02:43 GMT

option d

micronesia

United States24482 Posts

February 16 2010 02:43 GMT

Get someone who isn't afraid of bats to go in there and open the balcony so it can fly out?

seRapH

United States9706 Posts

February 16 2010 02:44 GMT

B. you have map control. it's fine. or you could try risking it and do both B and C.

Ronald_McD

Canada807 Posts

February 16 2010 02:45 GMT

C man go with C all the way

Fulgrim

United States560 Posts

February 16 2010 02:46 GMT

Poll: What should he do?
(Vote): move into the room with my beer bottles
(Vote): Do nothing and wait for it to run out of minerals in a few days
(Vote): Call my GF and cry.
(Vote): Jack off, "Maria Ozawa Sky Dark Angel.mp4" just finished downloading.
(Vote): Man up and open and face the bat

O-ops

United States4236 Posts

February 16 2010 02:48 GMT

D.

Oh wait, you're protoss. A it is then.

Mastermind

Canada7096 Posts

February 16 2010 02:50 GMT

E. Stop being a pussy and open the balcony door.

O-ops

United States4236 Posts

February 16 2010 02:50 GMT

On February 16 2010 11:50 Mastermind wrote:
E. Stop being a pussy and open the balcony door.

He's protoss

thopol

Japan4560 Posts

February 16 2010 02:51 GMT

#10

Tennis racket

theobsessed1

United States576 Posts

February 16 2010 02:52 GMT

#11

ahahahahaha maria ozawa

minus_human

4784 Posts

February 16 2010 02:54 GMT

#12

Try to throw a burning blanket or pillow inside that room, so it will smoke it to death. The blanket/pillow will be a necessary sacrifice.

geetarzero

United States217 Posts

February 16 2010 02:54 GMT

#13

definitely the maria ozawa movie. in reality, there is no other choice. : D

micronesia

United States24482 Posts

February 16 2010 02:58 GMT

#14

On February 16 2010 11:54 minus_human wrote:
Try to throw a burning blanket or pillow inside that room, so it will smoke it to death. The blanket/pillow will be a necessary sacrifice.

Definitely do not do this.

Fulgrim

United States560 Posts

February 16 2010 02:58 GMT

#15

Is the window/balcony open? The bat could fly out that way

Catch]22

Sweden2683 Posts

February 16 2010 02:58 GMT

#16

1: Get toothbrush.
2: Brushie
Brushie
Brushie

Corrupt

Bulgaria1312 Posts

February 16 2010 02:59 GMT

#17

Make corsairs and own him?

airtown

United States410 Posts

February 16 2010 03:01 GMT

#18

turn off the lights inside and open the door and a window. If you have lights outside, turn those on. The bat will fly to the lights.

Djabanete

United States2786 Posts

February 16 2010 03:03 GMT

#19

Research irradiate?

5/5 btw

Corrupt

Bulgaria1312 Posts

February 16 2010 03:07 GMT

#20

On February 16 2010 12:01 4iner wrote:
turn off the lights inside and open the door and a window. If you have lights outside, turn those on. The bat will fly to the lights.

lol that won't work, it ain't a night butterfly or bug to fly to the lights it's a frikkin bat man...
Neutron Flare is the real deal here.

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