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The past day was quite hectic. My family encountered some huge issue and it really shook our foundation. We sat in a circle in my room and discussed(argued mostly) about our next move and it was a really tense period.
This is not the first time its happening. It has happened when I was 11 years old and when I was 17.
I remember cowering like a helpless child back when I was 11 with so much fear and my mother being the mother that she is, hid all that resentment, pain and fear and smiled and patted me, comforting me and saying that everything would be alright.
Its been 8 years since then and she's been under the same tremendous work, family and marriage stress. I see her go through so much and I can never begin to understand the things that she had gone through.
My mother lived to protect us, her children, from all the troubled that had plagued us due to bad decision making.
You see, I don't have a bright past. Perhaps this may be a shock to most of my school mates and friends. I appeared to be well to do and such but no. The truth is that my family suffer a huge financial burden.
It dates way back when my dad did business. For the sake of protecting my parents, my dad didn't do very well and lost alot of money.
We now live in a house that we're struggling to uphold every month. I can just imagine the amount of burden that my mother holds. Its not just one huge thing that they bear, its many little things and one huge thing.
This is the third occurence to my knowledge in my life now and I've realised that I'm now a man. I believe that being a man is to stand up and do something in the times of trial despite your fear. That is courage.
If there's anything that I would take away from this experience is that the decisions you make may not just change your life but also affect the ones close to you.
For the longest time, I didn't want a girlfriend because if we ever progress to marriage, I don't ever want to put her through such pain and resentment that my dad had put my mum through.
I don't want any sympathy but I'm just here to let some steam off and to tell or to remind fathers/husbands or fathers/husbands to be that your decision as the head of the household will really affect the perceptions of your children and spouse. Your decisions don't just affect you. They change them too.
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If its a financial problem, you could always get a job
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that's terrible man, want my sympathy or not you have it. I hope you all will be fine.
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Solution A Get a rich girlfirend. Easy does it.
Solution B Play Poker. Even if it seems risky at first but if you manage your bankroll well and avoid playing when you're down you can make a lot of cash even at the lowest stakes.
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Find a good Network Marketing company which has a sustainable system, it's a good start for some better income, and at the same time, work a job. Jobs will only add to your bitterness and gives you crappy returns for your time invested in it.
If you asked me what a good network marketing company is, I'd say look for one which has a conducive environment for learning business skills and making you grow up faster. Putting your time in such companies will give you less returns at the start, but persevere and you will find that once your downlines kick in, your income will be worth the investment of time.
P.S - A good network marketing firm always has a product that has a huge market. Don't be a victim of a Ponzi Scheme.
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On October 30 2009 01:29 AzureEye wrote: If its a financial problem, you could always get a job
Yea, you say you're 17, I'm pretty sure there are places that hire at that age.
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If it's financial, no matter how hard it is, it ain't that hard.
You could always move to a cheaper place, or whatever.
Working part time as a minor is possible in most places in the world.
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On October 30 2009 01:38 LastWish wrote: Solution A Get a rich girlfirend. Easy does it.
Solution B Play Poker. Even if it seems risky at first but if you manage your bankroll well and avoid playing when you're down you can make a lot of cash even at the lowest stakes.
come on, what kind of advice is this? The guy barely has enough to eat and you're telling him to gamble what he has left? Poker isn't the solution to everything, get a part time job.
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I know a family in a pretty bad situation which may or may not be similar. Here goes... The husband embezzled money (millions) for years, and will now have to go to jail for a while. Many kids involved, some from previous marriages, 4 of them in college. They will lose all they have in all likelihood, to lawsuits and so on. The wife went back to work and is buying a smaller home (they had 2 expensive ones, one in Hamptons). I imagine, as other people suggested, the kids will get jobs too, and no doubt some college loans (not a bad deal with today's rates).
Hope your situation is better, but either way, chin up. It will take some adjusting and life changes but you will get through this. Also, don't be afraid to date... at this age you shouldn't be thinking marriage, failures and big responsibilities anyway. Just wear protection :-)
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On October 30 2009 01:38 LastWish wrote: Solution B Play Poker. Even if it seems risky at first but if you manage your bankroll well and avoid playing when you're down you can make a lot of cash even at the lowest stakes. lol, that is the worst advice I have ever read.
Poker (and gambling in general) ideally should be done only by rich people who aren't damaged by losing. Unfortunately gambling adversely targets poorer and more desperate people.
If you want to earn money, do it some way to does good for somebody or produces something. That is safer, more secure, and actually benefits society. You can also develop skills that will help you throughout life and make you more marketable.
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Poker is not gambling, it's a strategy game of managing monetary values for risk/reward. First get a job, then play poker as an additional source of income.
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Poker is not what it was 10 years ago so quit recommending it like it's some sort of miracle source of money.
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On October 30 2009 04:17 niteReloaded wrote: Poker is not what it was 10 years ago so quit recommending it like it's some sort of miracle source of money.
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I'm glad you got something good out of it, when you get married I'm sure you'll be a good model for everyone in your family!
I'm also sorry about your situation, keep us updated!
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On October 30 2009 01:38 LastWish wrote: Solution B Play Poker. Even if it seems risky at first but if you manage your bankroll well and avoid playing when you're down you can make a lot of cash even at the lowest stakes.
lol that's the absolute worst thing that he can do right now.
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IMO don't listen to the guys about poker (unless you think you can do it... i still greatly discourage it). I understand what your going through because I am too going through financial stuff because of my dad. All you can do is to do well in school, because that is what will allow you to get trained in a career and earn money later on.
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On October 30 2009 02:16 dinmsab wrote:Show nested quote +On October 30 2009 01:38 LastWish wrote: Solution A Get a rich girlfirend. Easy does it.
Solution B Play Poker. Even if it seems risky at first but if you manage your bankroll well and avoid playing when you're down you can make a lot of cash even at the lowest stakes. come on, what kind of advice is this? The guy barely has enough to eat and you're telling him to gamble what he has left? Poker isn't the solution to everything, get a part time job.
Thanks Dinmsab, gambling aint the answer. I'd say that all gambling and drugs etc should be waited with until your'e mature to handle it, for many people that would be at 25, some at 19 some at 30.
If your'e still in school, then try to get a weekend job. Cleaning or whatever you've got to start somewhere. I was lucky, got my job through recommendation by friends, if u've got connections then use it.
Best of luck with everything! Also don't say no to girls if you're 17. Even though you must take responsiblity at a young age, stay positive and have fun. Those things doesn't have to change.
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Hi guys thanks for your advice. Unfortunately, I'm not able to get a job at this point in time. I'm currently in the military and I'm only getting like $SGD 500 a month. Its an offense to actually get a job outside while I'm still in service so getting a job now is out of the option.
I do give them some money every month but it isn't much because I still have to pay for my daily stuff, like eat when I'm at home, transport etc.
I'm 19 now btw
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Russian Federation4235 Posts
Girlfriends are not really for marriage, especially at your age. Go get one asap.
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