These things have massive sickle CLAWS that would give Freddy fucking Krueger a bigger hard-on than the time you swallowed a whole bottle of viagra to try and keep a fraction of the stamina a zergling has while raping its way through hardened criminals-come-infantry three minutes after its born

haha, nice

Panoptic

United Kingdom515 Posts

June 06 2010 12:39 GMT

#47

The protoss one is embarrassing, but to tell the truth I don't think it's possible to write a good one for them, they're just inherently so...girly.

Rabiator

Germany3948 Posts

June 06 2010 12:51 GMT

#48

Destroying is easy - creating something new is hard. Zerg only "create" within their own body (i.e. develop new mutations), but humans have written sonnets, created the cuckoo clock and have built bombs which will make a planet uninhabitable for their own species. I doubt that Zerg will ever get beyond creating "funky looking slime" as an art form ... :p

fly.stat

United States449 Posts

June 06 2010 12:52 GMT

#49

On June 06 2010 21:38 Ryan22 wrote:

Show nested quote +

haha, nice

Seconded, this was the best part.

InfiniteIce

United States794 Posts

June 06 2010 12:58 GMT

#50

absolutely the best post I have seen in the last month.

Keep going OP.

Vain

Netherlands1115 Posts

June 06 2010 13:00 GMT

#51

im happy too see a positive topic once in a while^^

Ksyper

Bulgaria665 Posts

June 06 2010 13:25 GMT

#52

Haha man that gave me good laugh :D

slowmanrunning

Canada285 Posts

June 06 2010 14:02 GMT

#53

Mutalisk - You remember bats? fucking flying rats that only live with the intention of hiding in the dark waiting for a victim to come by so they can let out blood curdling scream that would make indiana jones shit his pants, followed by fucking mauling your face until it looks like you had a late night make out session with a fucking woodchipper? Mutalisks are the size of your over-priced family sedan. Imagine; they eat faces and shit spikes at people, those spikes then hit others in a cluster-fuck of raw carnage that would give the hardest of necrophiliacs a limp dick. These fucking car sized bats would scare the living shit out of anyone.

Batman was terrified of fucking bats, they made him shit his little 8 year old pants. He overcame that fear, but I guarentee you he would still be a sniviling 30 year old virgin stuck down a well if he saw the fucking unimaginable terror the mutalisk can cause. They decending upon you with speed and ferocity unmatched with the wings of beelzebub himself attached.

You can not run, you can not hide,
or a mutalisk will fuck you from the side.

This is straight from your NIGHTMARES
[image loading]

Madkipz

Norway1643 Posts

June 06 2010 14:10 GMT

#54

too much swearing and idiocy to be good. sorry but real men can make things awesome without sacrificing diversity.

AeonStrife

United States918 Posts

June 06 2010 14:30 GMT

#55

I like it

-Iron-

Germany27 Posts

June 06 2010 14:47 GMT

#56

Not a bad try, and much better than the stupid toss one.
But big ugly insects will never be as manly as a bunch of crazy motherfucker on drugs with machine guns in their hands that shoot the shit out of every kind of aliens that cross their paths.