i HAVE HAD iT WITH THESE MOTHERF***iNG MiSLYNCHES iN THiS MOTHERF***iNG GAME!"
I found ourself sitting comfortably, alone on one of the airport terminal's cushioned benches. As contemplation was starting to yield decent wording variants for plausible scenarios on how the decision was made to place skateboard pictograms next to their corresponding flight slots on the information screen, the one which was of interest to us eventually lit up. Murmur gave way to the sound of vintage speakers relaying an announcement, affirming all rows' availability to begin boarding procedures for LiQUiDAiR Flight 187. Passengers who had opted in to augment their travel experience by playing mafia games became easy to distinguish from the rest. Albeit having had to conceal a bit of an initial cringe, you too had answered the premature call for the maneuver to coagulate the posse tight, via the act of putting on the visorshades.
A post in the virtual, 3D forum's mafia game lobby popped up, "Skateboards roflmaop&sm, amirite?" just as your smartphone had finished synchronizing the reginet uplinks to the airline's WLAN. Excited one of the others thumbed, "Most subtle Tokyo ad ever;" ready to parade (too?) having connected the dot to the basket representing the radical discipline debut at the 2020 summer Olympics, and collect awe. Having queued us in, we felt as though the aforementioned caller had thus attained absolution... We've hoped in vain to overhear somewhat similar-sounding snippets of conversation on the topic, and were moments away from throwing the alley-oop ourself for someone else to follow up on the ice-breaker with a wit-dunk. Emitting what must've resembled a shrug we wound up discarding it, and, since the signal was not yet strong enough to render the shared digital world, you started probing for indications that something better to do is presenting itself, then figured reading the FAQ was it, and had thus missed the smile on the face of the attractive person of the opposite sex walking next to us, who saw everything courtesy of 20/20 corner-of-the-eye vision.
AP "Eerie, isn't it?"
You "The what now?"
AP "Oh I'm sorry. Still no headphonerinos in your earios, I can tell this is your first time. You've missed an eerie piece of music from Langoliers' soundtrack. Almost made me turn back, to be honest with you."
You "I don't know who or what Lando Lear is; just kidding! But I was just reading the FAQ. I'm actually.."
AP "Now you are," <= in a Yoda voice, "but are you sure that's what you were doing just a second ago, hmm?" Wide smile.
Now "I suppose not. I mean.." ... "It's funny, though. The minute something is readily attainable, the appeal of attaining it falls like angels all the way down the trenches of the infernal abyss.
AP "Woah.., I have no idea what made you say that, but I can agree with you on the funny part. I'm [redacted], btw. Nice to meet you!
Now "Coolio. I'm We, nice to meet YOU!"
[redacted] "Alright!" Cheerily awaiting your next move.
We ... "Ahh; let's see here,"
[redacted] "So what's it saying?"
Q&A to and from an anthropomorhized TLMafia subforum Q: Hello, TLMafia! Might I ask what you've been doing recently? A: If not quite nothing, little.
Q: Interesting flavor, fitting to break the ..mould; I guess? Would now be a good time to /in Mafia On A Plane? A: "About this time, someone is telling you to get on the plane. 'Get on the plane. Get on the plane.' I say, 'f*** you, I'm getting iN the plane! iN the plane! Let Evil Knievel get ON the plane.'" — George Carlin
Q: "I'll be in here with you folks in uniform! There seems to be less WIND in here!" XD Ahh, I'm a bit surprised that you chose to discontinue the ol' OP tradition, but I can get used to this. I nevertheless would like some info on the setup, if it's not too much trouble. A: Let me just say that I, more than anyone, would like a fancier banner; preferably having the stencil heads of the traditional one photoshopped to be seen through the windows of an airplane's exterior. Perhaps a video animation, some slow-motion movement of the tiles, suggestive of conversation and a tranquil journey —were it not for the suspenseful langoliers theme playing— until a gunshot suddenly pops a skull right as the plane hits an air pocket.
...
Q: You're dodging the setup question, aren't you? A: Yes. I doubt details like setup, role mechanics, cycle length, time of deadline, etc., are to be addressed until the flavor catches up and thus makes them relevant.
Q: May I remind you that this FAQ seems to be the focus of the ongoing flavor? Should I not therefore conclude that it is opportune to ask? A: Fair enough, you should PM the host for clarification on issues that might prevent you from fully participating; I only know everything anyone ever wrote here. Although, this has all indications of a flavorcraft, multi-user shared holodeck game. So if all else fails, try having your way by writing it into the story, or hack into the account ¯\_(4)_/¯
We "Ok, check this out. I was thinking something that's figuratively speaking the same sport as.., actually wait! Can you tell me what 'p&sm'stands for real quick?"
[redacted] "I don't know. I didn't.."
"..PiSSiNG and SOiLiNG myself, heh heh HUEH! Get it?"
We "What's wrong?"
[redacted] "Someone, quite possibly Eddie Izzard himself, as opposed to an impasta sounding exactly like him, ..has just resoundingly answered your question over the voicecom's radio stream. Although I'm not sure how he could've heard you, maybe he didn't; or rather did so unwittingly, answer I mean."
We managed to insert our earpieces in time to listen in to the jock, who HAD to be him, say: "because their little wheels are 4," recognizing the beginning of one of our previously least favorite mainstream Limp Bizkit songs, "..rollin' on the floor."
in association with Liquibets, Multiple Personality Disorder Skills & FlaSh's rant on flashmobs
We "I decree to myself that this tune no longer sucks."
As if Eddie, more accurately the context of forum mafia had infused the lyrics with meaning, you now saw it as a parody for /in and /out shenanigans.
We "Thanks TL!"
[redacted] "It never did suck. Dat instrumental and the reference to N 2 Gether Now; thirst is snowballing fire."
"I can't hear you but I can read, edit and add to the narration. Let me lift another load of ignorance off ya," said the Izzard sound-alike, for everyone to hear, after Rollin's volume faded as a result of him pushing to talk. Suddenly the music video, there it was, streamed to everyone's visors.
A: Taking over from here I'd say either 9, 13, 17 but preferably 20 players. 2, 3 or 4 poker tables with 4 seats each inside a Red Dead Redemption 2 saloon. Either static, one table acting as croupier for the next, or seat & player-to-croupier and back-to-player rotation, the latter being easier than it sounds. Physically y'all better stay put unless you have to use the restroom, either way.
Q: Am I crazy thinking you'd revive Artanis' thread for this? Sorry for interrupting .. go on; I long to understand. A: What must've been a religious feller by the name of AllHailHydraGod layed out something slightly different, curiously enough shortly before Arty posted his attempt at a more traditional approach. It's in the fine print, if you catch my drift.
Q:
On December 24 2018 02:02 AllHailHydraGod wrote: + Show Spoiler +
You thought there'd be a game announcement, didn't you? Instead, it's just an image and now you're sad. Aww Well snap out of it and rejoice because it is the announcement of an upcoming game: [T][M] Poker Mafia
Scum choose a deck's card sequence before each dayphase and paste it in a PM to inform the host / croupier. Mafia and texas hold'em poker are played in-tandem throughout the game, using the voting thread to announce folds, calls and raises. The host incorporates the order in which the cards are discarded into the sequence and keeps dealing accordingly upon deck exhaustion.
If mafiosi abuse their card knowledge too much it might raise suspicion, nevertheless a secondary objective is to win as many chips as possible while still securing their faction's victory.
By the end of Night [insert # of initial mafiosi], if the mafia is still alive then all town players will PM me their educated guess as to the identity of the remaining mafia players. More correct guesses from living town players than mafiosi left alive means the mafia lost the game.
Signups open till or full (12 players). PM me to sign up, and shhhhh. Keep it on the DL cuz snitches gon' snitch, and it's TL Mafia getting the stitches, not them, for shame.
:gasp: A: I'm positive it wasn't played in my domain, though. 'Twould take time to scan other areas I've been invited to, but technically it's possible..
"Take a look around this part," he said, meaning a shot of Durst in the foreground and dancing females behind him, occupying 1/3rd of the horizontally split screen, the rest blacked out for a short while, to the beat gradually filling out the dark portion with repeats of the same shot. "Now when I saw this occurring twice throughout the video, I thought to myself, 'this has to mean something!' I wasn't like, ..instantly getting it like our friend, you, did the little bit of the ol' in-and-out reference, but eventually I realized something. And after some snoopdogging into the matter, ..now you're in range, so, I can show you; observe!" "WARNiNG! The footage you are about to see should be treated with the same level-o-secrecy as a private message containing your role, i.e. meant for your eyes only. Do not react to it; carrion boarding the plane. Don't mention it, by accident, in jest or otherwise, until your part in the game has reached its conclusion, lest you risk early alignment exposure with the potential to ruin the game for everybody; which isn't as bad as it sounds, we'll just proceed with the next, most likely without you, but still."
... There Can Be Only 4
We "I think I'm on to something, when I say that wasn't the role PM just now."
[redacted] "No surprise there. Proprietary role-distribution technology. No /in? No secrets — that's not how TLMafia got from dusty tumbleweeds to riches beyond RiCH's wildest wet, playing-doctordreams."
"Where's the money Lebowski, they did NOT RECEiVE THE MONEY!"
Q: ? A: Ah yes, the insert coin to continue routine. Anyone got anymore of them "/in"s? Before ze Winter gets here
Q: I meant what can we deduce from this last piece of information. 4 what? A: Aiur?! Listen, I can only elaborate on the ideal. It's up to you real folk to use me in a manner befitting my strengths, this being no exception. Say we have 13 players. If the 3-players-strong mafia wins, the fourth will be the best-performing townie, and vice-versa. One obvious goal is to be among those 4, while another is to develop the thread(s) into a riveting read. It's one thing to win a flavorless game by acting relatard, and quite another to raise the bar on the meta for hosting and playing one, the latter being what develops me into the subject of interest of more than the 4 regulars and their smurfs; ..hallucinating lives outside this forum they'd wish they had, and/or that anyone would care.
Q: Aww.. bitter little TLMafia. Don't worry, I've frequented other sites and they're not all tha.. A: I mean look at the f***ing "Community Thread".., complaining about airports is the new drug of choice there, and Slam discovering his dick! FFS. No players to ban but he's crying for the banlist. Look at the Active Game Thread OP. This HAS to be a joke that just keeps on getting funnier. At this rate it'll be ridiculous in 20 years.
Q: How do you like FF for mod? A: The SNiTCH?! JUST BiGFANF***iNGTASTiC! I can't think of nothing better for me than for him to host another one of his fecal feasts disguised as the [T] I've been holding my breath for, not in anticipation, believe you me.
Q: I can see I shouldn't have .. A: You know what really turns me into a wild animal? That the lot of you actually think the progaming circus is where it's at. Newsflash, they're playing on electric devices, okay? There'll never be a guarantee against manipulation. There'll never be more than 0.01% who'll play the games for longer than an hour, and 1% of those playing ranked/ladder, and 1% of those getting the bandwidth, framerates and peripherals that could actually start making them globally competitive, and 1% of those with ties to the developers who know the hidden stuff 20 years prior to it being made public and.., so on.
Q: I'd like some clarification on the poke.. A: What the f*** does it matter which one of the ones who are still surfing at that point wins this time? ME! That's who the gold is hidden under, my current state.. is garbage. But I've been here waiting, and waiting for someone to turn me into gold, and I have it all. I have filters for everybody! I'm like football, any ßrazillian can play me on the outskirts of the slums and become a global icon once flavorcraft blows up. Who else do you know has twitch-clip embedding; that's right!
Q: ..uhhm.. You could throw a.. a million bucks Corrupted Cup's or BSL's way, and have them play starcraft. Intense, I know, I love it too, hooray for e-sports, but it doesn't change the fact that those people are total strangers with nothing interesting to pack into that format for you; it's way too limited by itself. But while you're on here, playing or sharpening dat flavor, and getting explained 2-10, J, Q, A, what you've asked me in just a moment, you can watch them roflstomp each other because I can play streams, too.
Q: Twitch-clip mafia would be cool. YEES, find a way for me to hook you, them, progamers, voice actors, roleplayers, musicians, the charismatic and the annoying influencer people alike, people who generate worthwhile material, people with ideas, people with tools, people who have constructive tendencies and let's play forum mafia with each other, and revel in my dynamic nature's potency for a great time.
Q: Perhaps getting rid of those ads might do good, too. A: Siphon just a fraction of the goddamn DoTA money and let's get rid of my ads, and get good ads, make some funny or otherwise interesting ads ourselves. Get an admin to implement skateboarding liquidbets.
Q: Is that what this game is an ad for? I definitely feel shagged but not raped by it, now that you mention it. A: Let's have a game of mafia where those who can think of the best flashmobs are more likely to win, and then pay people to actually execute one. Organize cashmobs, let's make a parallel-view 3D app, let's make at least parts of TL 3D.. You've been leaving me here to ROT! I mean what do you have to say for yourself?
Q: I only haz question, ma bruh. A:WHY? Anyway. I can be Atlantis, Asgard, El Dorado and Mount Olympus in one, except real, is all I wanted to say. You don't have to drag your RL sh** in here, you can be next-level, a superintelligent neohuman and forget all your discomforts.. actually that's what's expected of you, my friend. Stop turning me into a dystopic dating column for personal ads. Stop being pathetic trying to make yourself look rich, worldly, busy and intolerant to all that's awesome. Amused by failures to realize potential, acting dull and dense you'll never amass the abundance of fun that I hold in store for you. Make me look good, you damnfool!
As I was saying..
Q: Good energy, I'm hyped AF. Awesome rant from a parallel world, btw. The contrast really makes our awesomeness pop: I'm about to play pokermafia inside an RDR2 simulation in 3D, while I'm flying on a plane that has the TL logo painted on the hall, right where my boarding pass says my seat is, for Christ's sake! Fill me in on the pokertables. Using for the cards is practical and cool. A: Mayhaps a 3-race, 10+1-strength, skimmed version would do better, but yeah; at the very least for tutorial purposes... Wait! We, Eddie Izzard, tutorial.. Izzard Eddie tutorial We :gasp:
We "I know. They must be halfway through scanning my retinas by now, getting a feel for my pupils, vital signs, brainwaves.."
[redacted] "Ooof, a guinea pig. Yeah, not me. I paid the piper. Not the deluxe, though, but still. I get to keep my real life meta pokerfaced."
We "Not a problem, I might not be myself by this time tomorrow thanks to a condition which happens to render any and all such disadvantages moot."
[redacted] "Daaam, you sound crazy.. I like it! Cmon, we're up.
Q: Quicktopic? A: You heard the man. Scum will get exclusive access to the account, and help out with the card dealing. Just a quick incognito log-in away.
Q: Elephant in the room: Rules? A: We've already seen a demonstration of how not to post. Reacting to a game being posted after a month of nothing, the least one can do is intuit that a short and meaning-devoid post is inappropriate, and so is quoting it in the very next post.. if one is referring to the most recent one. I encourage censoring any swear words on the surface, keeping it interesting and polite. The speakeasy, however, is a place for lanchorlunhinged expressionl/anchorl. Those not curious or easily offended can thus keep playing without having to worry about getting triggered to respond in kind.
Q: Player list & filters, important post index, yah-di-yah-da A: Prolly in the voting/sponsored thread. I assume poker information and votecounts will be snowballed by those whose turn it is. You may not vote if it's not your turn to make a move on one of the tables. My suggestion: have each of the tables have a designated role in the flavor crafting. There seem to be three layers, the narration, this FAQ and the dialog. When a player is sitting on the voicecom table, he or she will propose a couple of paragraphs to the story. If the winning hand is more powerful than that of the other divisions, its priority to get worked in peaks. Changing seats, getting around like merry-go.. or Amerigo? .. eventually a player winds up without a seat, which means voicecom radio duty.
Scum and mod are to use this liquidlegends account facet for posting poker stuff. No edits allowed
[redacted] "Don't tell me you checked all the boxes."
We "Sure did. They put in an extra pair just for me. Told you, ain't nothing to it."
[redacted] "Prove it! I'm not buying a word you say until you prove you're 0-level."
We "Alright." Wide Smile, "here!" Extends visor "Rewind, fast-forward, slow-motion, change what you want. I have it norton ghosted on my phone. Takes me about a minute to restore.
[redacted] Flabbergasted, "..all your reality in one minute, Jeezus!"
We Chuckles, "I told you it's not all me. In fact, I'm not the only one being me right now. I guess they can tell how much I kinda like talking to ya, so they let me.
[redacted] "This is.., gimme a sec." ... "So, am I reading this correctly?"
We "What?"
[redacted] "You didn't write the thing.., with the.., Tokyo?" In a conspirational, 'Hail Hydra' manner, "that just blows my mind! And neither did.." ... "I'd like to keep this for as long as you'd have me have it.
We "You know I can't do that. I'm curious" .. slowly retrieves the 0-level cleared visor, "What would you even want to change if you could?"
[redacted] "From what I've seen? It's .. soooh, i don't know, i mean I have a couple of ideas, but, overall, just keep it neat and simple I guess, and don't hide anything from me..." >:[ "Do you even know I didn't hear you say anything about the poker thing, you were just like, 'what's roflmaop&sm?'"
We "I know, I interrupted them to ask you that. First time I managed to strong-arm control, actually. It appears as though curiosity helps, I can fight them off wielding it skillfully.. It might get easier once someone dies off, more memory and processing power for the rest, which is why I agreed to /in — to get in the top 4 or die trying."
[redacted] "You have scum and townies in your head?"
We "Well, I mean, we all do. A functional, normal human brain has 2 poker tables —all of them— playing mafiapoker together, one croupier for the other. The brainpower required to make TLMafia own a plane requires 4 tables, with players switching seats, the way electrons flow in a current. Our friend Eddy is proof that it can be done. He can edit the narration, which you've seen when you put on my visor, rhyme and put on relevant music as a radio jock, bounce, and so on. When you, us and everyone else here in la-la land start playing on the plane, the lot of us is going to try to get enough /ins to get a head start on ridding ourselves of the facets that hold the dimension we are uplinking from back from becoming what reality is here, and of course do our best to shape it skillfully as we go along. From what I've researched it's damn nigh impossible, because, as you eloquently put it.. dusty tumbleweeds; but the righteousness is no doubt 4handN."
[redac] "4 what? It's like your talking through the phone, breaking up."
We "Losing coherence for our face .. I must be getting boring. The other faces, the ones that we as a team have to fight for resources like insight and courage all the time.. are making it.. hard!"
[red] "Scheletal animation."
W "WhaT?!
[r] "Do you .. wahtn to lewwrn .. sssskkkk"
We "Oh shin it's working.. yes, yes I do! I want to make a cool banner for our game."
[redacted] "Figured as much. Come, I'll teach you. Go, we're up. Get on the plane."
We "I'm getting iN the plane."
[redacted] "Exactly. Just stay curious; we got you. You'll get to know a lot of good people and their ideal mafia-hosting concept stories. You're good, don't worry. I'll give you a key to a basic spriter software, we'll have that banner up in no time at all.
Had to EDIT this to issue a Warning! The 3rd clip, featuring ryuquezacotl speedrunning diablo2 also features loud, distorted audio, that might be damaging to the ears if listened to with headphones and volume raised high.. + Show Spoiler +
Hello. I currently preside over table 1's starting position seat #4. Would you like me to help you intuit how I promote and run my forum mafia games? A: Of course. It's about time.
Well first I make sure I'm not dealing with people who can't be enjoyable while pointing and typing, or can't promptly recall random finepoints of their meta while being challenged in an environment that demands advanced hand-eye coordination skills.
I could gather the potentials into an osu! room, and we'd play my custom Dr Dre instrumental beatmaps and blitz mafia during breaks in-between tournament games of starcraft. I can pack a lot of info about the soonish-to-be-played forum mafia game into the audio, including a pop-quiz aptitude test for the players to answer via PM, ASAP, after everybody has warmed up, and we've played the role distribution beatmap, whereby the ranking output decides which role slots they get to fill. Which roles get attributed to which number in the ranking gets decided by association with a Starcraft Tournament game or inspired by my eagerness to witness the Skateboarding Olympics, or the information-screen slot of the flight I'm taking to get there..
When I have a working product, I anchor it to a number: the non-chemical equivalent of big cats spraying their scent on a tree or bush, I concoct dope lyrics that incorporate all facets of the mechanics and their connection to the number and the circumstances of birth. I then pay a twitch or afreeca streamer to spit them to a particular bpm and scheme, and clip it, download the clip with streamlink and develop a beatmap over it, which I transfer to the role-bearer + source and commentary material.
Now most streamers would exhibit a jaded reaction to such a request, so I got to get to know the portal inhabitants quite thoroughly, picking out my favorites, amassing awesome clips and doing my best to enjoy and conduct myself in a mature fashion during chat interaction, so they know my intentions aren't to put them on blast, so to speak. In fact I'm the founder and 4-shot/day-night cycle moderator of a 'livestreamwins' thread on TL3D — where I encourage the trend of streaming live-gampeplay in 3D, and joining up with fellow IRL streamers, in order to attach the cameras to one pod, so that they're parallel-view 3d-ready next to each other.. easily viewed as such on any phone, for example (without the loss of frames and contrast/brightness that comes with shutter or polarized-light glasses), VR goggles or visorshades. I like to think that it's in part because of me, that most phones will now have two cameras placed apart from each other in the future in this dimension, as well. Ok so far? A: The alleged future you saw, yes. I hope so, I can dig it. I'm down to bury some of these posters deep. Just get me a couple of those shots..
Equipped with 40 second shutters, the cameras on the phone combined with a make-believe blackboard make for a good notepad equivalent. I'd go out stargazing and place my phone somewhere static, while writing out every role-related detail with a LED light, and place animated versions of the images as 3D backgrounds for the beatmaps, and have the sliders trace them.
In preparation immediately prior to gamestart, I show the scumteam how I choose my twitch clips, and other embeddable media, to augment my interactions, in-tune and in-tandem with staying true to the ideas to be expressed AND preserving their relevance as I connected them to the media, and package them for effect and purpose... What? A: Those who suck at this don't get to see the inside of the tetrahedron.
#2: Emolio: "This sorceress isn't even that hot, and I'm supposed to tackle that there behemoth-axe wielder while she's rubbing herself off to our internecine sausage fight, f*** that I'm outy; does she even know what internecine means, she looks dumb AF, yo."
#1: "My name is Nona Yobizinisu, vanilla milkshake. Get a tan and deodorant, leave before I call Yakuza boyfriend!" Creepy, glue-sniffing losers — attracting them like magnet, always! *later, tearflow warping her reflection in the male-Kpop-idol-stickers-laden mirror*, "Why am I so lonely, What's wrong with me Baekhyun-kun?!" *snorts* "..I'm talking to a sticker!"
#0: "Oh lawd, What the f*** is in those potions? And why am I getting aroused watching fossils get it on; not good, it's been so long. Single-handedly I could take on all three prime evils at once, and feel my vagina atrophy, or.." :shrug:
Black Friday promotional offer, Mafia on a Plane /ins for a quarter of the price: all you need to do is keep track of the poker card decks' sequence changes and PM the players their cards & post flops and rivers - and all that only if you rando scum. No deadline, no pressure. I expect the game to last a week, 2 weeks tops, cruzin' steady as she goes towards a new era of worthwhile-ness. Dealio?
Either way, stop typing off-topic and get with the grove or get out.
EDIT2: Yes, hit the road Day-Walker, we don't take kindly to saladfingers here. Your boots were made for walking out of this thread and that's what they'll do. Not one of these days but right now you're gonna walk out on a cool game by any standards, with lenient people as long as your intentions are friendly, as indicated by the chill song and the arms-wide reception. Do reconsider, unless you had valid reasons not to play, for let me tell you something, to the ear. Come closer.. HAiL HYd .. I mean.. Flavor is flavor.
However, you should realize that there are benefits in making sure we don't have any multis signing up to a game with more than one account at once. I promise, this initiative is not to dox you.. the ads to your right hand side are prolly long done with that, and you shouldn't worry about it..
EPT![[image loading]](https://i.imgur.com/8eoQaFm.png)
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what you've asked me in just a moment, you can watch them roflstomp each other because I can play streams, too. ![[image loading]](https://i.imgur.com/9tQ3y9X.png)
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Scum and mod are to use this liquidlegends account facet for posting poker stuff. No edits allowed![[image loading]](https://i.imgur.com/GcSWVd0.jpg)
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