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If you have a crush on a girl...

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1 2 Next All
LilClinkin
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Australia667 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-09-01 10:11:05
September 01 2009 09:05 GMT
#1
edit:
On September 01 2009 19:09 LilClinkin wrote:
Ok thanks for the replies guys, thing is, I'm not the guy trying to cut some ones lunch: I'm the guy having my lunch cut.

My girlfriend of 2 (almost 3) years is currently on medical school rotations in the country, so I only get to see her on weekends. Apparently one of the guys with her is in the situation I described in the original post: Made friends under the pretense he currently has a girlfriend, yet admits to her today that he has broken up with said girlfriend and has a crush on my girl.

Normally I'm not angry if a guy has a crush on my girlfriend, it's happened before and I was okay with it. How ever, I'm pretty pissed off in this case because as I said, he is aware that she and I have been together for a long time, he is aware that we're going through a new experience as we come to terms with only seeing each other on weekends, and he basically gets to see her from morning to night monday-friday. Add onto that the fact that he has probably been lying to her at least 1 week of having a girlfriend and has used it to talk about fairly intimate stuff about our relationship, and I am feeling quite fucking pissed off.

I guess I made this topic because as I said, I'm not really the jealous type...but I do I think I have a right to be pissed off in this situation, and I want TL opinions about it.

PS. I'm not really concerned about her ditching me for the guy, she is a very loyal girl and I trust her. But that doesn't change the fact that I think this guy is a huge faggot.

Hypothetically:

If you have a crush on a girl, who you know is in a stable relationship with another guy for at least 2 years, do you tell her?

Give reasons as to why/why not tell her.

Does it make a difference if you know the guy?

Does it make you a shit bloke if you tell her?

Does it make it bad if you've befriended her under the pretense that you yourself have a girlfriend, yet in fact you actually broke up with said girlfriend a month ago?
Boblion
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
France8043 Posts
September 01 2009 09:09 GMT
#2
If she is in a stable relationship chances of success are low imo...


Also if you know the guy it is like the worst thing you can do to him.
fuck all those elitists brb watching streams of elite players.
Shauni
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
4077 Posts
September 01 2009 09:11 GMT
#3
On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
If you have a crush on a girl, who you know is in a stable relationship with another guy for at least 2 years, do you tell her?


No, I'm a pussy and I wouldn't compete with a guy already in a relationship. I think it's cruel.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:Does it make a difference if you know the guy?


If you know the guy well, and he's not an asshole, even more reason not to tell her.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:Does it make you a shit bloke if you tell her?


No, believe it or not, girls have a will of their own and I think she'd decide for herself how to proceed.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
Does it make it bad if you've befriended her under the pretense that you yourself have a girlfriend, yet in fact you actually broke up with said girlfriend a month ago?


Yes, building up lies is not a good way to start a relationship.
I'm taking whatever coverage I can get, because frankly, I'm busy working on this million dollar deal at my job. Early retirement is a good thing brotha man. - MessengerASL
Ftrunkz
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Australia2474 Posts
September 01 2009 09:12 GMT
#4
I wouldn't tell her... maybe if she'd been with the guy a very short time i'd think about it. But thats a serious relationship she's in, I highly doubt she'd break up with him for you and you having nothing else to gain by telling her other then a lot of awkward moments in the future between you.

Btw. whatever you do don't lie about having broke up with your gf... Tell her at the next available (appropriate) moment. Don't randomly just say "i lied and i havent been with my gf for a month" just say "me and so so broke up". If she finds out you havent been together any other way (and for a long time) it's gona be hella awkward too...

Getting caught up on girls who are taken is probably the worst feeling ever, but there's not much u can do but get over it imo.
@NvPinder on twitter | Member of Gamecom Nv | http://www.clan-ta.com | http://www.youtube.com/user/ftrunkz | http://www.twitchtv.com/xghpinder
bN`
Profile Joined May 2009
Slovenia504 Posts
September 01 2009 09:13 GMT
#5
No, get drunk and forget about her. Preferably don't talk to her until your crush passes. Unless the guy is misstreating her or something don't be the dickhead that's her friend and says bad things about her. And anyway, if she does tell you he is misstreating her or that she's losing interest then she probably sees you as a friend so your chance are still pretty low.
"It's just a ride." - Bill Hicks
PanN
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States2828 Posts
September 01 2009 09:14 GMT
#6
This is definitely something you shouldn't ask anyone but yourself.
We have multiple brackets generated in advance. Relax . (Kennigit) I just simply do not understand how it can be the time to play can be 22nd at 9:30 pm PST / midnight the 23rd at the same time. (GGzerg)
MaReK
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
Australia446 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-09-01 09:17:13
September 01 2009 09:16 GMT
#7
Just because there is a goalie, doesn't mean you can't score.

But seriously, the best thing you can do is let it go.
"My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night it was to time an egg "
Schnake
Profile Joined September 2003
Germany2819 Posts
September 01 2009 09:18 GMT
#8
On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
Okay hypothetically:

If you have a crush on a girl, who you know is in a stable relationship with another guy for at least 2 years, do you tell her?

Give reasons as to why/why not tell her.

Does it make a difference if you know the guy?

Does it make you a shit bloke if you tell her?

Does it make it bad if you've befriended her under the pretense that you yourself have a girlfriend, yet in fact you actually broke up with said girlfriend a month ago?


Do not tell her under any circumstances. It will ruin your friendship, except if you are sure that she is into you too.

No.

Yes.

Yes.
"Alán Shore" and "August Terran" @ LoL EUW - liquidparty
lazz
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Australia3119 Posts
September 01 2009 09:26 GMT
#9
relationship advice on a starcraft messageboard, i love it.
Boertie
Profile Joined July 2009
Netherlands98 Posts
September 01 2009 09:27 GMT
#10
Tell her, all is fair in love and war.


Do not tell her under any circumstances. It will ruin your friendship, except if you are sure that she is into you too.
A friendship with a woman is so overrated, the ultimate goal is to get a relationship with a girl even if it means a possible risk of destroying a friendship, which is in my opinion fine.
Waar homos inroeren is wat wij vervoeren!
BWdero
Profile Joined February 2008
Netherlands476 Posts
September 01 2009 09:37 GMT
#11
On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
Okay hypothetically:


Riiiiiiight.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
If you have a crush on a girl, who you know is in a stable relationship with another guy for at least 2 years, do you tell her?

Give reasons as to why/why not tell her.


Eh thats a tough one, depends on whether or not you think shes better off with you, if your willing to be responsible for breaking up a happy relationship etc etc. If it's just a crush (read: will pass in time) like you say I'd say don't do it man.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
Does it make a difference if you know the guy?


Oh yes, then it's just a dick move. Already was, but if you know the guy even more so.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
Does it make you a shit bloke if you tell her?


Kinda.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:Does it make it bad if you've befriended her under the pretense that you yourself have a girlfriend, yet in fact you actually broke up with said girlfriend a month ago?


Lying to the woman you're trying to steal from a guy you know. Real classy.
Stars fighting! Member #43 of Violet fan cafe. Fuck Kespa.
ShaperofDreams
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Canada2492 Posts
September 01 2009 09:38 GMT
#12
Go for it because you are not her boyfriend. Well if it doesn't look like it will be successful don't do anything since it's a lose-lose situation.

I don't think you are going to base your decision off of TL so idk what I was thinking lol
Bitches don't know about my overlord. FUCK OFF ALDARIS I HAVE ENOUGH PYLONS. My Balls are as smooth as Eggs.
Hyde
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Australia14568 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-09-01 09:39:08
September 01 2009 09:38 GMT
#13
Don't be a lunch cutter, especially if they are both happy atm (two years man)
I wouldn't tell her (I've been in this scenario before, she's now married with a child), reason being she's already happy with who she is with.

Unfortunately the heart wants what the heart wants, if you do decide to tell her, there's a good chance she will tell her current bf and you may want to prepare for a visit from said bf. He would most likely want to have (hopefully a friendly) talk with you.

Yes it does make a difference if you do know the guy, it may even be awkward.

Edit - Oh yeah, good luck!
Because when you left, Brood War was all spotlights and titans. Now, with the death of the big leagues, Brood War has moved to the basements and carparks. Now, Brood War is unlicensed brawls, lost teeth, and bloody fights for fistfulls of money - SirJolt
VarmVaffel
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Norway378 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-09-01 09:39:52
September 01 2009 09:39 GMT
#14
Don't be an asshole, sleep it off.
FabledIntegral
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States9232 Posts
September 01 2009 09:46 GMT
#15
Don't do anything about it - chances are you'd just make it more awkward.
Peeano
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Netherlands4988 Posts
September 01 2009 09:46 GMT
#16
No
She's in a stable relationship
No
Yes
Yes
FBH #1!
hefty
Profile Joined January 2005
Denmark555 Posts
September 01 2009 09:47 GMT
#17
Lol - real, honest advice in this thread.

I were expecting a lot of "wtf don't be a pussy go get her you cunt" comments.

hifriend
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
China7935 Posts
September 01 2009 09:47 GMT
#18
On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
If you have a crush on a girl, who you know is in a stable relationship with another guy for at least 2 years, do you tell her?
Not really, because in 99 times out of a hundred nothing good will come out of it. Could be an alternative if she's shown some serious signs of affection/wanting something "more." If you're currently good friends with her you might fuck that up.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:Does it make a difference if you know the guy?
well personally I don't believe much in this "bro's before hoes"-crap people go on about, because in reality such a thing don't exist. But if you are friends with the guy you should understand that your friendship might be at stake if you tell her, which adds up with the other reasons not to tell her.

On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:Does it make you a shit bloke if you tell her?
Um, not really but you can be sure her boyfriend thinks so. Anyhow you're not doing yourself a favor in doing so.
On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:
Does it make it bad if you've befriended her under the pretense that you yourself have a girlfriend, yet in fact you actually broke up with said girlfriend a month ago?
Wtf?
LilClinkin
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Australia667 Posts
September 01 2009 10:09 GMT
#19
Ok thanks for the replies guys, thing is, I'm not the guy trying to cut some ones lunch: I'm the guy having my lunch cut.

My girlfriend of 2 (almost 3) years is currently on medical school rotations in the country, so I only get to see her on weekends. Apparently one of the guys with her is in the situation I described in the original post: Made friends under the pretense he currently has a girlfriend, yet admits to her today that he has broken up with said girlfriend and has a crush on my girl.

Normally I'm not angry if a guy has a crush on my girlfriend, it's happened before and I was okay with it. How ever, I'm pretty pissed off in this case because as I said, he is aware that she and I have been together for a long time, he is aware that we're going through a new experience as we come to terms with only seeing each other on weekends, and he basically gets to see her from morning to night monday-friday. Add onto that the fact that he has probably been lying to her at least 1 week of having a girlfriend and has used it to talk about fairly intimate stuff about our relationship, and I am feeling quite fucking pissed off.

I guess I made this topic because as I said, I'm not really the jealous type...but I do I think I have a right to be pissed off in this situation, and I want TL opinions about it.

PS. I'm not really concerned about her ditching me for the guy, she is a very loyal girl and I trust her. But that doesn't change the fact that I think this guy is a huge faggot.
Severedevil
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States4838 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-09-01 10:18:15
September 01 2009 10:12 GMT
#20
On September 01 2009 18:05 LilClinkin wrote:Does it make it bad if you've befriended her under the pretense that you yourself have a girlfriend, yet in fact you actually broke up with said girlfriend a month ago?

Don't start a game without a clear plan in mind... your build is too fucked to continue. Just type out, pretend you weren't playing for serious, and figure out your goals before you enter a match with someone else.

EDIT: Oh, your girlfriend got proxied. Just BM the douchebag and go on with your life. (If he persists, remind her that harassment is illegal.)
My strategy is to fork people.
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