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Active: 1655 users

/avoid sex; +1 soul.

Blogs > mSLeGenD
Post a Reply
1 2 3 Next All
mSLeGenD
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
115 Posts
October 01 2008 05:18 GMT
#1
I am so fucking pissed, I just wrote this entire thing out and accidentally clicked the Piano Man TLFE which erased my entire post. Which was well over 1500 words by that point.

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKUFCKFUFKCUFKCUFKC
k so I will attempt to retype it.


Lately I have been attempting to become a better person, I usually do things without thinking and do what ever comes around the corner. Anyone who has taken a driving course knows that you cannot hesitate when you drive, and what is thinking twice if not hesitating?

So this is really bad for relationships since it means I will pretty much sex whatever and whoever I want becuase I just don't have any empathy for what others could be feeling. I have cheated on girls before just because the opportunity arose and didn't care that it ended.

Despite my assholish nature however, I am generally an exceptionally nice person. It's just I don't get attached and don't let the consequences of my actions bother me, even if those consequences hurt others. Now me and my girlfriend haven't seen eachother in a few weeks now becuase she got in a lot of trouble a few weeks ago for hanging out with me without telling her parents, so we went from having a lot of sex to me being try now, which pretty much sucks. However that's not really that big of a deal for me, I have gone longer than that without sex, I'm not an addict of some sort.

The thing is, I like this girl a lot becuase we have had a lot in common and generally how this situation arose. It's actually odd and it defies ladder theory. Before the summer I was going out with her best friend, they were closer than sisters since they live together. During that period me and Adrii became really good friends since we would talk all the time. When the summer started Monica (my ex) moved out and back in with her actual family. I still talked to Adrii as much but Monica became a bitch and we drifted a part. Me and Adrii ended up becoming more then friends and are going out now. Monica is not amused, however that is a story for another time.

The last 2 days I have been talking to some girl who I have have known for a while but have not hung out with in a long time. Today she asked me to hang out after talking to her like the last 2 days, so I agree, just me and her. This isn't really odd for me since I have a lot of girl friends for whatever reason, So hanging out with a girl just the 2 of us is not a big deal for me. We end up going to these cliffs that overlook a river which is a really nice view, it's actually considered a romantic setting; however I go there with friends all the time, but when it's 1on1 I think it must be alittle different. I'm just oblivious to shit like this though !

So after that I ask her if she wants to go get ice cream, since she had driven I told her I would buy her ice cream, which isn't actually strange for me or romantic. If I'm hanging out with a friend of mine or someone I usually will buy them some food or something, it's just how I am. I realize I forgot my wallet though so I told her to stop at my house first where no one is home.

On our way back to my house I am telling her about my kickass TV and sound system in my room since I had just recently updated my room to be the most awesome home theatre ever (I brag and tell most about it a lot becuase I'm proud of it) pimp ass 32in tv, 5.1 system and a 600 watt receiver. pretty badass (although the receivers kind of weak, I don't believe it's outputting 600watts, maybe 120 max)

--- Side tracked.

So I invite her in to come check it out while I search for my wallet which I have misplaced because I'm a jackass. So shes up in my room listening to music and I can't find it, so I asked her if she just wanted to hang out at my house since I couldn't find my damn wallet. So we are in my room and I was showing her some movies I had and how I had watched The Bank Job and how it was basically porn for the first 10 minutes becuase of the amount of nudity in it. So she tells me to put it on becuase she likes sex and wants to see it.

Okay, so at this point I am starting to think something might be up, we had talked a lot about sex and I had told her how I was dating Adrii and how I liked her alot which I figured got the message across I didn't really want to do anything. So I put it on and we are watching it kind of and at this point I'm laying on my bed and shes sitting on the end of it and we are just kind of talking about sex, so it gets to a sex scene and I mention how I haven't had sex in a 2 weeks and miss it.

Pandoras box hath been opened my friends. I am an idiot. The following conversation ensued from this.

Girl: "So you want to have sex?"
Joe: "uh.... Adrii's in trouble I can't"
Girl: "Come on you know you want to, you just said you wanted to have sex. Do it"
Joe: *not looking at her* "I CANT DO IT"
girl: "Why not just do it, she doens't have to know"

At this point she starts moving towards me.
girl: "Come on we can even do it quick"
Joe: "I CANT ADRII WILL FIND OUT AND KILL ME, STOP."
girl: "We won't tell her."

she gets on top of me and goes to kiss me, since I'm smooth as all fuck, I turn to the side and cover my mouth, and I'm just like, "seriously, i don't want to I like Adrii I can't do it."

SHE STARTS TO UNBUTTON MY PANTS. at this point my fucking savior arrives, my dad had just come home and opens the door and shouts up the stairs to us.

dad: "Joe whose here?"
joe: "err, Alex"
dad: "MALE OR FEMALE?"
joe: "female"
dad: "get the fuck out of your room"

YES! MY DAD HAS SAVED ME FROM THIS SITUATION.

So the girl now known as Alex tells me how I am saved by my dad and to button my pants, so she walks downstaris and leaves. I proceed to walk over and thank my dad for saving me and told him what happened.

Overall I am proud of myself, I just passed up on sex with a girl who was admitadly not that attract but still, that's a damn fucking step for me. A year ago I would of fucked her and not even cared what happened, so here is progress for me!

Soul+1 baby. YEAH.

The next stories are going to be epicly more hilarous. Becuase I do A LOT of dumb shit which always results in insane and retarded stories.

dis shit can NAUGHT be made up.

+ Show Spoiler +
Oh god, It almost just happened again, my internet died as I hit post message


**
My nationality is NOT Canadian, And that's all you need to know.
Not_Computer
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Canada2277 Posts
October 01 2008 05:25 GMT
#2
"thanks dad, you prevented me from having sex"

interesting
"Jaedong hyung better be ready. I'm going to order the most expensive dinner in Korea."
yubee
Profile Blog Joined May 2006
United States3826 Posts
October 01 2008 05:30 GMT
#3
oh its monkeyspanker
Azrael1111
Profile Joined July 2008
United States550 Posts
October 01 2008 05:30 GMT
#4
I stared at this page for a couple minutes, but all I read was "Look at me and all these women who want to have sex with me".
yubee
Profile Blog Joined May 2006
United States3826 Posts
October 01 2008 05:31 GMT
#5
hey by the way did you get into MIT?
illeszt
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States350 Posts
October 01 2008 05:32 GMT
#6
5/5 waiting for next storeis
G5
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
United States2919 Posts
October 01 2008 05:35 GMT
#7
good for you

props~
VIB
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Brazil3567 Posts
October 01 2008 05:39 GMT
#8
Don't understand what's the difficulty. My double daily visits to redtube keeps me from having any interest in ever cheating my gf. Porn is the best loyalty tool for men. You should try it yourself!

btw if you lose your post by clicking a link you could just press alt-left instead of rewriting the whole stuff ^^
Great people talk about ideas. Average people talk about things. Small people talk about other people.
Spenguin
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Australia3316 Posts
October 01 2008 06:24 GMT
#9
you could have just backspaced -_-"
< TeamLiquid CJ Entusman #46 > I came for the Brood War, I stayed for the people.
Scorpion
Profile Blog Joined April 2006
United States1974 Posts
October 01 2008 06:39 GMT
#10
Wow, those opening lines really describe me... it's scary actually.

"Lately I have been attempting to become a better person, I usually do things without thinking and do what ever comes around the corner"

Me too... impulsive XD!

*high fives*

"So this is really bad for relationships since it means I will pretty much sex whatever and whoever I want becuase I just don't have any empathy for what others could be feeling."

Me too... unfortunately ._.

"Despite my assholish nature however, I am generally an exceptionally nice person. It's just I don't get attached and don't let the consequences of my actions bother me, even if those consequences hurt others."

...are we brothers? XD!

Er, but, I believe cheating is the worst way of ending a relationship. People should just say it, "I'm tired of this relationship and hanging out with you all day and all this boring shit; I just want to fuck other people because you just piss me off with your presence and I don't even know why." Me and my girlfriend both agreed to just tell each other if we were going to cheat on each other so that it can end quick and fast, not be all painful and stuff when you find out 3 years later or something...

;_;
Mango @ U.S.East!
OmgIRok
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Taiwan2699 Posts
October 01 2008 08:05 GMT
#11
a 32 inch TV is supposed to be "pimp ass" ?
"Wanna join my [combo] clan?" "We play turret d competitively"
Jizz
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Australia224 Posts
October 01 2008 08:33 GMT
#12
Think about it.

If you were a bad person you would have been mid-sex when your dad came in. God has your back.
I made this account before i knew what the name meant. I just thought it sounded coooool
BottleAbuser
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Korea (South)1888 Posts
October 01 2008 10:17 GMT
#13
I don't see why you wouldn't respond very clearly and strongly if you really didn't want to sleep with her. If someone is aware that you don't want to do something, and is encouraging you to do so anyways, that person obviously doesn't respect your intentions.

I'd personally be angry and probably respond very strongly, if it was something like sex that we were talking about.
Compilers are like boyfriends, you miss a period and they go crazy on you.
Naib
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Hungary4843 Posts
October 01 2008 11:08 GMT
#14
Oh lol, Monkeyspanker
Complete the cycle!
Piy
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
Scotland3152 Posts
October 01 2008 11:14 GMT
#15
I'm sorry your such a desirable person.
My. Copy. Is. Here.
Yizuo
Profile Joined December 2004
Germany1537 Posts
October 01 2008 11:37 GMT
#16
nice story, would read others too
how old are you?
TechniQ.UK
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United Kingdom391 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-10-01 12:32:21
October 01 2008 12:31 GMT
#17
Lol your dad is hardcore man!
"Male or Female"
"Get the fuck out of your room!"

:o
Wait, mslegend! Is this joe!?!?
Fan of: Acer.Scarlett and Liquid'NonY //
d(O.o)a
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Canada5066 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-10-01 13:51:32
October 01 2008 13:51 GMT
#18
On October 01 2008 14:18 mSLeGenD wrote:
SHE STARTS TO UNBUTTON MY PANTS. at this point my fucking (Z)sAviOr arrives, my dad had just come home and opens the door and shouts up the stairs to us.



Savior love *thumbs up*
Hi.
MasterReY
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Germany2708 Posts
October 01 2008 13:54 GMT
#19
dad: "Joe whose here?"
joe: "err, Alex"
dad: "MALE OR FEMALE?"
joe: "female"
dad: "get the fuck out of your room"

hey plz explain why ur dad wants you to come out?
He doesn't want you to have sex????
https://www.twitch.tv/MasterReY/ ~ Biggest Reach fan on TL.net (Don't even dare to mention LR now) ~ R.I.P Violet ~ Developer of SCRChart
TL+ Member
Frits
Profile Joined March 2003
11782 Posts
October 01 2008 14:03 GMT
#20
Wait are you expecting anyone to congratulate you on not cheating?

lol

So why did your dad tell you guys to stop what helllllll kind of dad is he.
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