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Okay guys, I decided to write a blog, about me and my girlfriend. English is not my native language, so don't comment me on my fails in grammar, haha.
i've had a girlfriend for 14 months and around 25 days already, well..all those 14 months, we had fights, not huge ones, but just what every couple has. Everything was good, till wednesday..
We were at my house just hanging out, but already for around 2 months, always when she's with me, she always is on my phone (blackberry). I didn't mind really, but wednesday, I tried to take it from her, she hided it like behind her, and when I asked her, for who did you come here? me or my phone? she said that she came for my phone. I just..kind of snapped, went on my pc, and said nothing for 10 minutes. I started crying and pushed her out of my room, well let me fast forward, everything was cool 1 hour later, she said she understood me etc.
next day, we were on msn, and we kind of got in a fight again, this doesn't happen often, but she told me she told I made a huge problem from nothing yesterday, I was really hurt cause she lied in my fucking face. I asked my friends, 2 girls 1 guy, they all told me that I was right, and the guy was also a good friend with my girlfriend but he still said that I was right and she was wrong...
We kind of made it better, but today I saw her in real life for around 10 minutes, after school, I had to go home really quick because my dad was picking me up with the car. We talked, she said she still likes me, we kissed. Everything was cool..But just now, around a hour ago, I was on msn again, really happy that everything was cool again between us, talking to her a lot. But the only thing she said was things like; "yes, no, sometimes, yep." I asked her if somethings wrong, she said no, I kept talking, then she said me I really talkative today. I said yes and she said that she isn't really in the mood to talk. This has been since wednesday already like this. I asked her if she finds me annoying, she said yes. I was kind of, yeah..I asked for her oppinion, but if she loves and likes me, how can she find me annoying? I was being nice to her..before wednesday she always responded happy and really like a girlfriend would. I told her that i'll stop talking.
Havn't talked to her since a hour ago, I feel like we're falling apart, this wednesday i'll see her again after school for a couple of hours and i'll try to settle things with her and see what's really wrong with her. But I wrote this blog also to ask you guys, what did I do wrong? I kind of admitted to her that I was a little bitch and made a huge problem from it to like make her happy, today after school.
if you guys need any details about fights or us, just ask me.
I'm kind of mad at her right now, but I love her so much I just can't break up.
EDIT:
Guys I think some of you really got the wrong impression about the phone thing, let me get a bit more in detail. She was on my phone, I was next to her watching, she was talking with some friends on msn on the phone, I said like are you now done? She answered me no, I wanna keep talking. I gave her another 10 minutes etc then I took the phone from her, she grabbed it from my hands, but not like in a giggly and funny way. I was laughing a bit though, but yeah just I asked her that, and she went like no i'm here for your phone, but not really laughing and smiling while she said that. I was like oh okay then. Went on the pc, I didn't really cry, but my voice became like, you know the feeling when you have something in your throat, like a stone, it was that feeling. I still agree I was a little bitch about that, but I think it has to do something with;
On December 21 2010 05:46 fabulously wrote:
No shame in feeling horrible after a breakup in my opinion. Since you are 16 it is probably your first heartache. First cut is often the deepest. When feelings are involved everyone is fragile.
About the feelings thing, I just came from school, I noticed her at the lockers but nothing really happened. On one side i'm glad we broke up, but on the other side i'm really down.
 
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I know absolutely nothing about you, but I'm going to go ahead and guess that you're about 17?
You sound like you have low self-esteem and judge your worth on your relationships. Stop it.
I'll be honest with you, you guys are probably going to break up and you'll be sad for a while, and then you'll meet someone else and think you're in love with her too. This'll probably happen about 2 or 3 times, then you'll realize that you can't base your happiness on the success of your relationships.
Get some hobbies and other activities that make you happy without having to involve a girlfriend, and eventually the rest of the stuff will fall into place - there's no point in making yourself sick worrying about a relationship that, quite frankly, probably won't matter to you anymore within the next 5 years.
Overall, cheer up! :D Things aren't so bad.
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@Maero
Thanks for the fast post.
I just want to say, I don't have a low self-esteem, but I just kind of really love her too much. It's not like if we'll break up that I'll have no friends etc. I just feel kind of bad because I feel like it's my fault.
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Just be chilled out, women are like that so play it cool and take your time. No need to star in your own drama when you can just chill out together.
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Sometimes things just fizzle out, and dont feel the same for people. Perhaps she doesnt feel the same for you as she once did. Not everyone is just capable of maintaining long relationships, as once the novelty of it wears off, 1 of you might just not feel compatable. If she was being even slightly serious with the phone comment, then I'd assume that would be a decent indication that she isnt head over heels for you anymore lol.
From this 1 blog post, and just in my own opinion, you do come across as slightly annoying with the questions. I have witnessed guys act the same way around girls, and its never a good thing. You dont want to come across as super clingy/needy as I find that generally throws off both guys and girls. Just chill out, act like your not phased by any of this inner drama, and be a man about it. Give her the space and if she truely wants to be with you, she will obviously make the attempt to get back to normal. If she doesnt wanna be with you, then at least you will maintain your dignity, rather than look somewhat like an emotional wreck. Either way GL man.
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You can't handle this and she knows it, so she's keeping you at the edge. One of these days you'll snap and say it's over. She'll be fine with it and that will be that. My advice is - you do it, and do it now. Maybe you guys can hook up in the future again - for now, this doesn't sound healthy. Take my advice with a grain of salt because I don't know you or your girl. Maybe you love each other to death and my advice will end something beautiful. Just consider it.
Also - what kind of boyfriend are you to a girl? Where do you take her, how are you with her parents, how are you with the cooking, romantically etc? Are you dressed like the b/f, are you thinking about your future and your education? Seems to me like you're focused on getting HER that you're forgetting being someone who girls are attracted to.
You seem like a nice guy. Just get your priorities straight and you'll be alright.
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The only time you need to start drama is when you know that your gf is cheating on you. You sound very needy and sensitive, to the point where I don't think you realize it yourself sometimes. And I am like that in some regards. But you got to know your boundaries and her boundaries. If you want her attention, ask her for it. If she doesn't give it to you, she's just not that in to you. Don't start crying about it. It only shows that you are weak. Be assertive and appear not needy.
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you let your gf take your phone and then you cry about it???? good god hahahahaha
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Belgium6775 Posts
Don't be such a clingy weakloid. The more you start being an attention-seeking child in her eyes the more you'll push her away.
Cat-string theory son.
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On December 21 2010 05:19 Hawk wrote:
you let your gf take your phone and then you cry about it???? good god hahahahaha
Yeah, I'm having trouble sympathizing with the OP because of this.
But i'll try and be nice and say this - try really really really hard to not be too sensitive, try to chill out, and take things easy. It's okay to be in love with someone, but try not to tare yourself or her over just the little things - rather save that stress over bigger things.
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She kind of sounds like a cunt.
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Wow, guys. thanks for all the fast comments. yeah, I agree I overreacted on the phone thing, but it's just not only that.
I just asked her if she still likes me, she said no. Just while I was reading your posts.
She said it wasn't my fault, she just doesn't feel the same for me anymore.
I asked her if we were going to hang out on wednesday? She said no, I understand, I'm not crying. I just need your advice.
Break up now?
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You asked what you did wrong, it is no easy way to answer that. I dont know you at all, dont know anything about your history, personality or experiences, but I try to give you my thoughts either way.
It sounds a lot like my first relationship actually, I was constantly worrying over short answers and details like that. It drove me insane. It was quite ridiculous how much my mood depended on the degree of contact I had with my significant other. From what I read in your opener, it looks like you analyze a lot too.
In my experience it is easy to get into a bad circle, specially if she thinks you make a big deal out of something which doesnt mean much to her. If she has a bad day and only respond to you with yes/no/sometimes/maybe and you start asking her whats wrong, she might get annoyed at you. If she says she doesnt want to talk at the moment, and you keep asking her why and in general talking, she might get annoyed.
Everyone is put together differently, so what works for you, doesnt always work for the other person in a "conflict". You wanna talk with her, figuring out what is wrong, she seems to have some issues on her own, or just having bad days, which she seem to wanna deal with by silence. Some are talkers, others are thinkers.
I know for a fact that it is quite common to get annoyed at the people you love and adore. It is human nature. So it is still possible she likes you a lot, even if she is annoyed at you over a period of time.
My assumptions might be way off, since I, as mentioned, know nothing about you, nor your girl, but I say for sure I know your pain. It takes me back. I hope for your sake the outcome of your situation is better than what I experienced, but my best advice to you is to give her some space. It is rarely any point in forcing problemsolving.
Good luck, either way! Hope you keep us posted as this evolves one way or another.
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You pouted and cried because she took your phone? She was just messing around with you dude, you need to chill out quite a bit. From what you've described you come across as a bit clingy, needy, and definitely a worrier. She just needs some space right now, give it to her and things will work themselves out if they were meant to be.
Also, just out of curiosity, how old are you two?
Edit: Just saw your last post. If she says she doesn't feel the same way about you it is time to make the break man. Maybe the break will do you some good and you will get together later on, and maybe not. But if she isn't interested in you anymore, there is no need to keep torturing yourself by trying to keep it alive.
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On December 21 2010 05:29 Centaurion wrote:
Wow, guys. thanks for all the fast comments. yeah, I agree I overreacted on the phone thing, but it's just not only that.
I just asked her if she still likes me, she said no. Just while I was reading your posts.
She said it wasn't my fault, she just doesn't feel the same for me anymore.
I asked her if we were going to hang out on wednesday? She said no, I understand, I'm not crying. I just need your advice.
Break up now?
Sorry to read, man. And sorry to say, but it sounds like it has already ended If she doesnt like you like that anymore there is not much you can do unfortunately.
Not much comfort in this, I know, life just is though sometimes.
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I don't understand the thing with the phone.... lol. Why would she have come over for your phone? (I assume she was joking when she said that? )
And... yeah don't cry over something like that, o.o;
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Stop being so clingy. Girls will mindfuck us clingy guys. It's okay to love your girl but she's obiously being slightly irrational and being clingy the way you are right now will only feed into her. If she's going to be ignoring you and calling you annoying just go talk to other people and hang out with other friends until she's done being retarded. Otherwise she's just going to keep acting like this. It's how all girls are and yea its pretty dumb! Single life ftw.
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On December 21 2010 05:35 Haemonculus wrote:
I don't understand the thing with the phone.... lol. Why would she have come over for your phone? (I assume she was joking when she said that? )
And... yeah don't cry over something like that, o.o;
It is proof that Europeans don't understand sarcasm. I think.
also, I can't understand why your girlfriend would tell you that she doesn't feel the same about you anymore whilst she's watching you whine like a total and complete bitch on an internet forum to strangers..............
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Okay guys, I think you guys kind of got a diffirent point of view of me.
But I just broke up with her, I told her that it had to be done now and not any other time in school or so.
Thanks for the advice. I'm pretty down right now and shaking like hell, but to forever comes and end.
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On December 21 2010 05:32 Thegilaboy wrote:
Also, just out of curiosity, how old are you two?
I kind of wonder this too, no disrespect or anything, but the age can sometimes put some more perspective into the situation.
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EPT
