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Do not post if you only about to start arguing with people posting here. I know there are different points of view and different opinions.
Based on the replies and the appreciated help on my blog Action and Reaction and [Love] Oh Boy.. I decided to write a "guide" how to handle girls with respect and still attract them.
Obviously I won't the mistake to setup a guide in common sense. There's no such thing as a guide to pick up girls. Its all about behavior, psychologies and I'd call it timing.
First of all I want to tell everyone some basic things which alone will help you a lot if you remember them while addressing a girl or talking to one.
Don't be shy. There is no need to be shy. There is no need to be afraid that the girl will twit you. Most of the girls are flattered if they get addressed. If they twit you there's just two possibilities why they do so:
1) You addressed them with a total outstanding and dumb verdict. For example "Hey.. I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?"
2) They are arrogant and dumb. If they laugh at you if you talked to them in a friendly way asking them for example if they want to have a drink with you there would be no reason to put you down. If they do so, they are not even worth being sad about it.
A few examples of addressing a girl that work in most clubs / parties which are not dumb and actually very attracting.
1) Get eye contact whenever you have the chance to. (Important!: DON'T STARE) When she's dancing just bandy a few looks and smile. If you have a good smile there's a high chance of attracting her. If she smiles back its really good.
2) Addressing a girl when she's with her friends which is usually the case in clubs / bars. Its really hard to address a girl when she's not alone, because it makes you think the friends will laugh at you or something, but usually (I went through this..) they are just so quiet when you address her.
But still, most important thing is eye contact and your smile. Later you can ask if she likes to have a drink with you. From that point on its up to you, be yourself and don't try to force anything.
Be gentle and be interested, but don't go on their nerves. Of course its important to any girl that you are gentle, friendly and interested in her, but don't overdo it.
1) With being gentle I don't mean buying them anything they want, agreeing with them on any point or lie to them even if you have another opinion. By being gentle I mean the way you handle and talk to them.
They are not made of glass and they can stand another opinion. Also they are human beings who are supposed to be handled like that. They are by no means objects to satisfy your lust.
2) Don't let them be the middle of your world. If you for example are on a house party, don't stay the whole night with one girl. Quit her and talk with your friends after you talked with her for a while. It will give her time and she already feels if you are interested or not. Later the night you can have drinks with her, talk with her again and probably you can just leave with a usual farewell. (like a hug, or kisses on the cheeks)
3) Don't be too harsh. In such a situation you don't need to force yourself to get her number. She'll probably give you the number by herself if she's interested.
Don't go into the night expecting to leave with a girl and don't try to find your big love. Love is no thing that hits you in one moment rather it develops over time. (Of course there are love on first sight situations, but thats outstanding) You won't find love, love finds you. It nearly always happens if you are not expecting to get into a relationship. Just be relaxed, be yourself and enjoy the party and your life.
Another pretty important point is the view you have about yourself. Be confident, but don't be too confident. Don't think you're a faggot but don't think you're the best thing that could happen to her. You need to like yourself. You need to like your look, your style first. If you doesn't like you - how could a girl? If you doesn't love you - how could a girl?
Last but not least I want to point that you shouldn't be turned down by a "no" of a girl. Also there is no need to get angry because a girl isn't interested in you. There are many cute girls and you cannot expect any girl to like you or to be single - its obvious, isn't it?
Thats everything I want to / I have to tell you at the moment. Best of luck with girls, be relaxed, be yourself and be happy with that. Thats the way to happiness  !
 
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whats ur age again? 12, 13?
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Maybe you read the warning but it seems you didn't. As I stated I don't need persons like you in my blogs. Enjoy yourself being banned as you have no interest in helping others or getting help for yourself.
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Wait... your previous blogs were complaining about all the difficulties you had with romance, and now you're writing a guide to help others with romance? I'm not sure you're really qualified to write this yet. I mean, I more or less agree with all this, I just don't think you're the right person to be teaching others this subject.
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On April 13 2008 05:11 Luddite wrote:
Wait... your previous blogs were complaining about all the difficulties you had with romance, and now you're writing a guide to help others with romance? I'm not sure you're really qualified to write this yet. I mean, I more or less agree with all this, I just don't think you're the right person to be teaching others this subject.
First thing that stood here was totally witten wrong (confused :s)
What I wanted to say is the reasons I don't have a girlfriend are mainly because I'm shy and too interested like I stated in my guide you shouldn't. Its true that I have no partner, but that doesn't make my theory bad, does it?
Probably there are hundreds of guys which are good in constructing bridges in theory, but they would never be able to build a working one.
Theory is quite easy.
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On April 13 2008 05:14 G.s)NarutO wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2008 05:11 Luddite wrote:
Wait... your previous blogs were complaining about all the difficulties you had with romance, and now you're writing a guide to help others with romance? I'm not sure you're really qualified to write this yet. I mean, I more or less agree with all this, I just don't think you're the right person to be teaching others this subject. I learn quite fast and its not like just because I'm shy and I don't have a girlfriend because I always seem to be the best friend, I don't know the reasons for it. In theory I'm really good with addressing girls, but my shyness kills it, hehe.. Actually if you agree with most things I wrote its a good guide - or not?
lol..?
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On April 13 2008 05:17 BuGzlToOnl wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2008 05:14 G.s)NarutO wrote:On April 13 2008 05:11 Luddite wrote:
Wait... your previous blogs were complaining about all the difficulties you had with romance, and now you're writing a guide to help others with romance? I'm not sure you're really qualified to write this yet. I mean, I more or less agree with all this, I just don't think you're the right person to be teaching others this subject. I learn quite fast and its not like just because I'm shy and I don't have a girlfriend because I always seem to be the best friend, I don't know the reasons for it. In theory I'm really good with addressing girls, but my shyness kills it, hehe.. Actually if you agree with most things I wrote its a good guide - or not? lol..?
I corrected my post. It was confusing haha. Read again :p!
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remember, everyone on the internetz is a pimp in top physical shape with an 18" penis and over 200 IQ.
Nice guide, well written compilation of the info you've gathered, though this probably only helps younger people who don't know how to break the ice with girls yet.
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On April 13 2008 05:14 G.s)NarutO wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2008 05:11 Luddite wrote:
Wait... your previous blogs were complaining about all the difficulties you had with romance, and now you're writing a guide to help others with romance? I'm not sure you're really qualified to write this yet. I mean, I more or less agree with all this, I just don't think you're the right person to be teaching others this subject. First thing that stood here was totally witten wrong (confused :s) What I wanted to say is the reasons I don't have a girlfriend are mainly because I'm shy and too interested like I stated in my guide you shouldn't. Its true that I have no partner, but that doesn't make my theory bad, does it? Probably there are hundreds of guys which are good in constructing bridges in theory, but they would never be able to build a working one. Theory is quite easy.
Yeah that's the thing... this is sort of like reading theorycraft from a D- player. Maybe it's good, maybe it isn't, but either way how would you know?
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On April 13 2008 05:29 Luddite wrote:Show nested quote +On April 13 2008 05:14 G.s)NarutO wrote:On April 13 2008 05:11 Luddite wrote:
Wait... your previous blogs were complaining about all the difficulties you had with romance, and now you're writing a guide to help others with romance? I'm not sure you're really qualified to write this yet. I mean, I more or less agree with all this, I just don't think you're the right person to be teaching others this subject. First thing that stood here was totally witten wrong (confused :s) What I wanted to say is the reasons I don't have a girlfriend are mainly because I'm shy and too interested like I stated in my guide you shouldn't. Its true that I have no partner, but that doesn't make my theory bad, does it? Probably there are hundreds of guys which are good in constructing bridges in theory, but they would never be able to build a working one. Theory is quite easy. Yeah that's the thing... this is sort of like reading theorycraft from a D- player. Maybe it's good, maybe it isn't, but either way how would you know?
Well if you actually think my theory is that bad go on and state whats wrong with the points I wrote. I cannot discuss on the base you give me. You just state that my theory is bad because I'm not in a relationship. As stated before, I've lots of friends where I helped to get them into a relationship. I helped to save relationships and helped friends to get in touch with each other.
I'm pretty sure this guide will help people with low confidence in themselfes and is a nice write up of the information everyone could gather from my blogs.
Obviously its not a guide based on psycho logic visions that humans have in their head when addressing someone or getting addressed. I'm not a scientist. Its a plain and easy to understand guide with basic information on how to behave and attract girls. Not a "being Casanova" guide.
Edit: Probably I should have called it a compilation of information rather than a guide.
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Canada7170 Posts
I was gonna say something, but my "experience" is incredibly limited.
Personally, I try to become friends first so I know that we have common interests before asking them out. It depends what type of relationship you're looking for though.
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On April 13 2008 06:08 mikeymoo wrote:
I was gonna say something, but my "experience" is incredibly limited.
Personally, I try to become friends first so I know that we have common interests before asking them out. It depends what type of relationship you're looking for though.
Lots of people will tell you that friendship is the best thing you can do and build up your relationship on that. I agree with this in most common sense but I also have to say that the friendship shouldn't be too close because girls tend to have some "saving points" where they can always return to. This would be for example a best friend. This is why they nearly start a relationship with their best friend, they would lose safety.
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i read your entire blog post. it surely kept me reading. it was interesting, but you know, it's easier said than done.
it's so damn fucking hard to find girls that are "my type". the girls who know how to dress really well. please i'm not talking about girls who wear tacky shits like gucci, louis vuitton, and etc.
the girls, who can pull off designer clothes, but isn't bitchy and overly high maintenance, and are sophisticated, would be my instant love.
it's usually the koreans and europeans i see a lot in NYC, but these specific girls i'm talking about are hard to find around my school.
white girls here dress like shit.. so screw them. (TNF jacket, leggings, uggs)
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To be honest most of this stuff seems like basic skills that most people already know, but just need to learn to use in real practice.
as an example (sorry for the SC reference, but in this forum it's probably the best subject to use) it's like telling people that when they're playing they need to focus on keeping their mineral count low so that their macro will be more efficient. Most noobs probably already understand the concept, but no matter how many times they're told this the only way they'll avoid stockpiling 2k minerals in the early game is through trial and error. Which IRL probably means being rejected a few times which, for the average shy person that this seems to be aimed at, will probably crush their self-esteem. No matter how polite the girl might be about it.
However I admit that it's good to reiterate this every so often so that maybe it'll help someone at least give it a shot and maybe succeed.
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There's nothing fundamentally wrong with your guide, but then again, there's nothing in it that should surprise anyone older than 13.
Ask yourself, are you really trying to help other people here, or is this more about making you feel better about your skills with girls by writing a guide about it?
Guides should be written by people who know more about a certain subject than others, you don't meet that requirement I'm afraid.
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If you find this guide useful, you obviously have a lot of self-confidence issues and are afraid of rejection. Just go to a bar one night and hit on every girl there. You will get rejected a bunch and see that it's no big deal. It might even work with some of them!
If you have self-confidence issues for whatever reason, work on it. Fat? Run. Skinny? Lift. Pizza face? Change your eating habits and get some sort of facial cleaner.
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hahahahahaha. im sorry but this guide is funny. :D
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Well just as in SC mass gaming works too
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well if your trying to pickup girls, learn from Mystery.
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EPT
