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Slamming That Booty

Blogs > linestein
Post a Reply
linestein
Profile Blog Joined June 2018
United States210 Posts
March 06 2020 05:42 GMT
#1
This is a kind of girl blog because I am writing it when my girlfriend is over. As you can imagine, I literally have a girlfriend because girls like me so much. Girls literally look at me like you would look at your ACT/SAT/GRE score, and say, "wow it's so cool."

But why do girls like me so much?

I don't know. I've always thought of an IQ test as the monogamous regression line of basically celibate monks. Brilliant people like Leonardo di Caprio don't take IQ tests because who gives a fuck? He's literally going to be worth $400 million or $500 million regardless of what some arbitrary test assigns him. His personal power is so high that IQ doesn't even matter.

It's like climbing to some respectable 1% rank (like S) and thinking "man I could have done more." Are you just a statistic? Some would say you aren't really a statistic until you're significant at the .01% level. That's one in ten thousand. My girlfriend doesn't really give a shit about this stuff though because we've been together for fucking ever. We've been dating 14 years and she loves every second of it. I still love it too, but I love it more at a minute to minute or even hourly rate.

If I could think about what my girlfriend was worth to me I'd say she was worth maybe $5,000,000 (5 million). Isn't that grand.

She has beautiful lips and she gives beautiful tips.

I love my girlfriend and I wouldn't leave her for anything in the world. I think she feels the same way about me.

We had a long discussion about money where I pointed out that the top 1% of USA citizens have $10 million in the bank. When I think about my IQ which is significant within 1:10,000 then I'm in the .01% club. There are no published statistics for this monetarily (although the answer is surely known). So why am I not worth $100 million? Well it would be pretty great if I were worth $100,000,000 and had an IQ of 155. I'd be like into Elon Musk territory.

My girlfriend literally walked up to me, crabbed my tie and said "read my lips." And then she kissed me and told me: "I love you."

I felt so much better. I didn't have to worry about my IQ (probably not really 155) or my wealth (not really $100,000,000). All those minor concerns suddenly went away, and I slapped her on the ass and kissed her cheek. She smiled.

I knew she wasn't serious and that she really wanted me to have everything I wanted. I don't just want these things for me. I want them for her too. I want us to have a dynasty. I want our kids to inherit $200,000,000 from me. I want them to noble laureates and great humanitarians. In short I want my Starcraft MMR (2151) to be reflected in my real life situation. I want to be the best of the best.

***
"You can wish to be rich, you can wish to be tall. You can wish away the haters, you just gimme a call" ---Will Smith & DJ Khaled "Friend Like Me (End Title)"
intrigue
Profile Blog Joined November 2005
Washington, D.C9933 Posts
Last Edited: 2020-03-06 06:52:00
March 06 2020 06:39 GMT
#2
great way of explaining, and fastidious post to obtain data regarding the subject matter. during the processing of this information i was wondering to myself, 'what kind of tie you were wearing (in this worldline)?', if this discussion board is open to inquiries from the audience. i myself have always contained great fascination for paisley but in the current era i often find them to be a little boring, or too much like water, for that matter it is like looking into the bath tub. as my wisdom increases monotonically i have divined that everything one admires usually will be revealed to be crap, and little by little we are whittled away. anyways i have been going with brown ties for a while now, the plainer the better, in my opinion they optimize for practicality and are grievously stylish. thank you for your contribution!
Moderatorhttps://soundcloud.com/castlesmusic/sets/oak
linestein
Profile Blog Joined June 2018
United States210 Posts
March 06 2020 10:51 GMT
#3
yes, intrigue. it is like asking, how are the Protoss in your area?
"You can wish to be rich, you can wish to be tall. You can wish away the haters, you just gimme a call" ---Will Smith & DJ Khaled "Friend Like Me (End Title)"
Ryzel
Profile Joined December 2012
United States521 Posts
March 06 2020 20:54 GMT
#4
#JustWittgensteinThings
Hakuna Matata B*tches
_fool
Profile Joined February 2011
Netherlands675 Posts
March 06 2020 22:39 GMT
#5
On March 07 2020 05:54 Ryzel wrote:
#JustWittgensteinThings


Meaning is use!
"News is to the mind what sugar is to the body"
linestein
Profile Blog Joined June 2018
United States210 Posts
March 06 2020 23:10 GMT
#6
Cognitive synonymy is like telekinesis.
"You can wish to be rich, you can wish to be tall. You can wish away the haters, you just gimme a call" ---Will Smith & DJ Khaled "Friend Like Me (End Title)"
Salazarz
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
Korea (South)2591 Posts
March 08 2020 01:58 GMT
#7
If I could think about what my girlfriend was worth to me I'd say she was worth maybe $5,000,000 (5 million).


I love my girlfriend and I wouldn't leave her for anything in the world.


Except $5,000,001 or more in cash?
linestein
Profile Blog Joined June 2018
United States210 Posts
March 08 2020 06:52 GMT
#8
On March 08 2020 10:58 Salazarz wrote:
Show nested quote +
If I could think about what my girlfriend was worth to me I'd say she was worth maybe $5,000,000 (5 million).


Show nested quote +
I love my girlfriend and I wouldn't leave her for anything in the world.


Except $5,000,001 or more in cash?


In introductory economics we learn about consumer surplus. Although my girlfriend is worth $5,000,000 to me, I would probably end up paying a lot more than that for her!
"You can wish to be rich, you can wish to be tall. You can wish away the haters, you just gimme a call" ---Will Smith & DJ Khaled "Friend Like Me (End Title)"
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
March 08 2020 07:56 GMT
#9
I'm not going to entertain the illusion that she actually exists, but if you end up having a girlfriend in the future:

1. Don't try to cheat on her with girls you meet on the internet.

2. Don't put a definitive price tag on her.
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
linestein
Profile Blog Joined June 2018
United States210 Posts
March 09 2020 04:18 GMT
#10
On March 08 2020 16:56 ninazerg wrote:
I'm not going to entertain the illusion that she actually exists, but if you end up having a girlfriend in the future:

1. Don't try to cheat on her with girls you meet on the internet.

2. Don't put a definitive price tag on her.


There is nothing I can imagine more romantic than walking up to your future wife and saying "Hello, I think you're worth ten million dollars. But I'll still be masturbating."

Wouldn't that be a great joke?
"You can wish to be rich, you can wish to be tall. You can wish away the haters, you just gimme a call" ---Will Smith & DJ Khaled "Friend Like Me (End Title)"
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
March 09 2020 09:34 GMT
#11
On March 09 2020 13:18 linestein wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 08 2020 16:56 ninazerg wrote:
I'm not going to entertain the illusion that she actually exists, but if you end up having a girlfriend in the future:

1. Don't try to cheat on her with girls you meet on the internet.

2. Don't put a definitive price tag on her.


There is nothing I can imagine more romantic than walking up to your future wife and saying "Hello, I think you're worth ten million dollars. But I'll still be masturbating."

Wouldn't that be a great joke?


Definitely do not say that.
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
CadenZie
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Korea (South)545 Posts
March 11 2020 17:46 GMT
#12
can she cash out?
CadenZie
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Korea (South)545 Posts
March 11 2020 17:47 GMT
#13
asking for a friend... haha...
linestein
Profile Blog Joined June 2018
United States210 Posts
March 13 2020 05:57 GMT
#14
On March 12 2020 02:46 CadenZie wrote:
can she cash out?


The whole point of a dowry is to prevent her from shenanigans. People don't just get divorced over trifles. Look at Jeff Bezos.
"You can wish to be rich, you can wish to be tall. You can wish away the haters, you just gimme a call" ---Will Smith & DJ Khaled "Friend Like Me (End Title)"
JieXian
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Malaysia4677 Posts
Last Edited: 2020-03-13 11:03:50
March 13 2020 11:01 GMT
#15
On March 09 2020 13:18 linestein wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 08 2020 16:56 ninazerg wrote:
I'm not going to entertain the illusion that she actually exists, but if you end up having a girlfriend in the future:

1. Don't try to cheat on her with girls you meet on the internet.

2. Don't put a definitive price tag on her.


There is nothing I can imagine more romantic than walking up to your future wife and saying "Hello, I think you're worth ten million dollars. But I'll still be masturbating."

Wouldn't that be a great joke?


Definitely do not say that because you might be overpaying. Instead, you should ask her what her price is. If you do, you might find that the price is a lot lower. For example, Borat asked and got a good deal at £5:

Please send me a PM of any song you like that I most probably never heard of! I am looking for people to chat about writing and producing music | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noD-bsOcxuU |
.gypsy
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Canada689 Posts
March 14 2020 05:23 GMT
#16
wut
https://www.twitch.tv/gypsy93
TelecoM
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States10667 Posts
March 18 2020 00:58 GMT
#17
I love when people think they are brilliant genius's and worth billions of dollars just because they....think they are, nice read.
AKA: TelecoM[WHITE] Protoss fighting
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