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Active: 1975 users

How to deal with grief? - Page 2

Blogs > peanuts
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TojoZ
Profile Joined February 2014
United Kingdom13 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-12 11:08:56
September 12 2014 11:08 GMT
#21
I'm so sorry. I would agree with the other replies: don't bottle anything up. The emotions you feel are a natural part of losing someone close to you. Express them. I wish you and your friends' family/friends all the best. GL
TRUE & Sacsri fan!
Olli
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
Austria24422 Posts
September 12 2014 15:30 GMT
#22
Just don't forget that the world isn't always this disgusting, dark and terrible place. My sincere condolences.
Administrator"Declaring anything a disaster because aLive popped up out of nowhere is just downright silly."
dravernor
Profile Blog Joined May 2013
Netherlands6191 Posts
September 12 2014 16:08 GMT
#23
I'm sorry to hear that peanuts I think everyone has given great advice, no need for repeating it, but yeah. It is a horrible horrible thing, especially at such a young age.
<3
WonnaPlay
Profile Joined September 2010
Netherlands912 Posts
September 12 2014 17:03 GMT
#24
On September 12 2014 19:50 virpi wrote:
Six years ago, one of my best friends committed suicide. At first, I didn't really realize what had happened. It took time to really understand the meaning of such a loss. What helped me through those troubled times were my other friends. After we had got the news, we all met up in a house and stayed there for some days. It was lots of silence, lots of crying, lots of holding each other. Being able to grieve together made things a lot easier. The emptiness we all felt inside was filled by the realization that we were not alone. After the first hours of pure shock, we started talking about it. About him, about our relationship. Of course, we asked ourselves if we could have done anything to prevent his suicide. But we soon realized that this led to nothing but sore regrets. So we focused on moving on. Remembering our friend as the kind and lovely guy he had been. Our friendship grew stronger. And even though I still miss him a lot (he would have turned 30 a few days ago), I now know that I'm not alone.

So my advice would be: Don't stay alone. Talk to other friends, talk to your family. Look for people you love.
And yes, it takes time. You can't force anything.


I was about to write a wall of text, but Virpi here has described bassically the exact same details of my story, so I will just +1 this.
This is exactly what I did with my friends when one of my best friends also comitted suicide. 9 years ago already.. He just turned 18 back then

OP : This is a terrible thing to hear and I hope you can share this with friends who also knew her. For me it was christmass eve, and at New Years I went to my mates who also knew him very well, and we'd just spent the whole night talking the good stories.
Don't get yourself in a negative spiral, I had hidden this from some of my other friends and it kept getting worse, to the point that we went to the movies with a few friends and I just started crying out of nowhere, after someone joked something (we were also close by the spot where he came to an end).
So as many people suggested, talk , let it out, don't crop it up. I think you just posting this here is already a good start!
Trasko
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Sweden983 Posts
September 13 2014 13:19 GMT
#25
Man! So sorry to hear that :/ I couldn't even begin to imagine how you're feeling. Like others have said, It's probably best to talk to someone and to find comfort in friends and family.
Jaedong <3
Bereft
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States1007 Posts
September 13 2014 17:52 GMT
#26
i'm so sorry to hear like others have already said, talk and share your grief with friends and family. spending time and remembering the good things about her with those who also knew and loved her can really help.
Yorkie
Profile Blog Joined December 2012
United States12612 Posts
September 14 2014 21:21 GMT
#27
Sorry for your loss man. Definitely follow the advice some of these other guys posted. I don't really know what to add, since I've never gone through something of this scale but I'm here to talk to (and hang out with I'm only a short train ride away from NYC now that I'm back at school) if you want to
Hwang Kang Hooooooooooo. Follow mah boy Shellshock @Shellshock1122
DepressedOne
Profile Blog Joined September 2014
United States190 Posts
September 14 2014 21:27 GMT
#28
Something similar happened to me. My advice would be to process what's happened, but most important is to eventually move on or else the rest of your life will feel burdened. Everyone goes through their own struggles. You not alone.
Me sad.
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