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Bachelor Party

Blogs > ThomasjServo
Post a Reply
ThomasjServo
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
15244 Posts
May 21 2014 19:28 GMT
#1
This June, my older brother will be indefinitely lost to me as he gets married and ceases to have fun ever again. In all fairness his fiancee is a pretty awesome person, and as best man, chosen for reasons I'll never be quite certain of, I've been tasked with organizing the festivities to send him off into the land of 401ks, children, and general domestication.

[image loading]

There are eighteen confirmed attendees, and knowing most of these guys, this night will get strange.



Lucky for me, my brother is man of simple tastes and vices. Good Beer, good whiskey, and betting the horses at the track. All of which I am a fan of, so while I can't get as drunk as most of the participants in the interest of general organization, it should be a fantastic time.


Our loose itinerary is fairly standard:

    -Meet at bar
    -Horse Track
    -Adult Entertainment
    -Drink away the shame of the previous activity




[image loading]

I am not sure when else I would have a chance to use such a ludicrous gif


[image loading]

...or this one



What they don't tell you about organizing things like this, is how friends, often with the best of intentions, get bogged down in details, or offer just plain stupid suggestions. An example: This track is roughly 40 minutes from the glorious city of Saint Paul, MN wherein the vast majority of attendees reside, one party, fully away of where these individuals live, comes up with the following:



[image loading]


[image loading]

I kindly declined in the interest of public safety


It was not my intention to bring, potentially eighteen cars of reputable drinkers out to the sticks and end things with a huge cab fare for just about everyone involved. Other mildly obnoxious things have come up now that we are two weeks out, asking about exceptions, can the bus stop here, why aren't we doing x, and it does just get a bit overwhelming. I get it, they (save for the few selfish/lazy requests) care about my brother and want him to have a good time, but suffice it to say I don't have a long and fruitful career in event planning ahead of me if this experience has taught me anything.

I am getting a bit nervous about everything coming together correctly, not saying we won't have a good time, but I don't have the utmost confidence in some of the participants. I am just glad we'll have a bus to stash people who may overserve themselves over the course of the evening which I assume will happen to at least one person.




Next step is figuring out what to do with this speech... I've already been told starting off with, "Sam's fucked a lot of women..." is not a great way to start, who knew?

*****
MysteryMeat1
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States3292 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-05-21 22:42:24
May 21 2014 22:39 GMT
#2
woah, 2 tjmaxxx blogs in a week, This week just got aaamaaaazing.

so if i understand this right, you should just have everyone meet up in one spot at a bar or somewhere fun. Then go take a bus.

something like

meet-up somewhere fun
go get food then drink or eat food at bar.
go take the drive on bus while everyone is digesting/intoxicated
track
adult entertainment
drink
food

just my suggestion.

or get a bus and pick everyone up in the vicinity, and just have the friends who dno't live right next to everyone meet at a friends house. This way everyone gets everywhere together instead of waiting for people. this way you can pick everyone up in one go quickly, and have fun with everyone.

I would also reccommend doing fewer things in order to spend as little time on the bus as possible
"Cause ya know, Style before victory." -The greatest mafia player alive
Ctone23
Profile Blog Joined December 2012
United States1839 Posts
May 21 2014 23:09 GMT
#3
On May 22 2014 04:28 ThomasjServo wrote:

-Adult Entertainment
-Drink away the shame of the previous activity



um. what shame?

Have fun, and be safe. Went on one in New Orleans not too long ago. Inevitably, someone will back out (selfish, lazy, whatever) but that won't matter. As long as the people(however many) show up with a good attitude, you guys will have a BLAST.
TL+ Member
Titusmaster6
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States5937 Posts
May 22 2014 01:46 GMT
#4
Sounds like a fucking blast. I'm in my mid 20's now and honestly I really look forward to bachelor parties of my best friends. Hope you guys stay safe and have fun.

Also totally get you with the whole planning thing but it looks like you have everything under control.
Shorts down shorts up, BOOM, just like that.
Beavo
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Canada293 Posts
May 22 2014 02:21 GMT
#5
My wife wouldn't let me do anything fun, so i traveled 300 miles to see black sabbath play haha
No one remembers second place
vult
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
United States9400 Posts
May 22 2014 04:43 GMT
#6
Hey man have fun! Fuck lazy and selfish people, you shouldn't have to cater to them. Just have a fucking blast and make some memories that you will never remember.
I used to play random, but for you I play very specifically.
Pandemona *
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Charlie Sheens House51493 Posts
May 22 2014 08:23 GMT
#7
This is a bachelor party;

Drink in the morning
catch a flight in the morning to vegas
ADULT
ENTER
TAIN
MENT
wake up in the next days afternoon
"wtf hapened"
Catch evening flight home.

Come on you live in America for a reason, that reason is to have any form of adult party in Vegas!!
ModeratorTeam Liquid Football Thread Guru! - Chelsea FC ♥
lichter
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
1001 YEARS KESPAJAIL22272 Posts
May 22 2014 08:39 GMT
#8
I have a feeling we will find Vegas themed fan fictions in Pandemona's closet starring John Terry, Ashley Cole, Jaedong and various strippers who look like the Queen.
AdministratorYOU MUST HEED MY INSTRUCTIONS TAKE OFF YOUR THIIIINGS
Pandemona *
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Charlie Sheens House51493 Posts
May 22 2014 09:22 GMT
#9
Wow, way to lay that out in the open Lichter
I have been to vegas, went for my 21st birthday would go every year but its expensive as i like staying in the nice hotels :3
Also i gamble....alot
I did win $1,000 first night which paid for that holidays spending though so that was good. Many a stripper got tipped :D
ModeratorTeam Liquid Football Thread Guru! - Chelsea FC ♥
Velr
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
Switzerland10837 Posts
May 22 2014 09:29 GMT
#10
We normally just travel to some city (Münich, Hamburg, Freiburg, Prague…).

Drink the whole day and look around in the city. Maybe have some challenges for the bachelor (fun stuff, not totally stupid shit).
Drink the whole night/party, maybe visit a concert, whatever.
Maybe sleep in Hostel or directly back to the train station/airport.
Drink on the way home.

Adult entertainment? Only if the bachelor really wishes for it, in no way required/needed. I mean… If this truely would be fun, you would probably also do it from time to time when going out?
Oh… And Las Vegas is probably the most overrated place to party in the world… Hamburg is so much better, things actually feel/are „real“ there while Vegas is just a bunch of carefully assembled neon lights, casinos and strip clubs (which generally seem to be way more of a „thing“ in the US than in europe… Its imho one oft he bigger cultural diffrences but i guess even in the US that varies widely).
ThomasjServo
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
15244 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-05-22 12:52:42
May 22 2014 12:48 GMT
#11
On May 22 2014 08:09 Ctone23 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2014 04:28 ThomasjServo wrote:

-Adult Entertainment
-Drink away the shame of the previous activity



um. what shame?

Have fun, and be safe. Went on one in New Orleans not too long ago. Inevitably, someone will back out (selfish, lazy, whatever) but that won't matter. As long as the people(however many) show up with a good attitude, you guys will have a BLAST.




Knowing these guys it wouldn't be just a black out, but a power black out.

On May 22 2014 17:23 Pandemona wrote:
This is a bachelor party;

Drink in the morning
catch a flight in the morning to vegas
ADULT
ENTER
TAIN
MENT
wake up in the next days afternoon
"wtf hapened"
Catch evening flight home.

Come on you live in America for a reason, that reason is to have any form of adult party in Vegas!!


If we had planned to go to Vegas, planning would have been even more of a pain in the ass because I would have had to try to find spare livers for everyone the morning after.
Pandemona *
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Charlie Sheens House51493 Posts
May 22 2014 13:15 GMT
#12
Yes but then it is THE BACHELOR party
You only get one remember...well actually it depends. But you should normally only get one xD
ModeratorTeam Liquid Football Thread Guru! - Chelsea FC ♥
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32110 Posts
May 22 2014 13:26 GMT
#13
18 people is a lot. Get a big ass hotel suite, set up a small track in it, get some strippers, and have his buddies race them around the room while everyone takes turns betting

Fuck I should start my own party planning service
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
ThomasjServo
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
15244 Posts
May 22 2014 14:02 GMT
#14
On May 22 2014 22:26 QuanticHawk wrote:
18 people is a lot. Get a big ass hotel suite, set up a small track in it, get some strippers, and have his buddies race them around the room while everyone takes turns betting

Fuck I should start my own party planning service

Hard to handicap for strippers, "Well Candy looks good but she took a spill of the stage last week, so I am a bit hesitant, Destiny however has put in some good training and is looking solid on the hotel hallway track. She looks solid on the Hilton circuit."
MysteryMeat1
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States3292 Posts
May 22 2014 16:36 GMT
#15
I heard heaven can squat triple plates, so my money is on her
"Cause ya know, Style before victory." -The greatest mafia player alive
ThomasjServo
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
15244 Posts
May 22 2014 16:41 GMT
#16
On May 23 2014 01:36 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
I heard heaven can squat triple plates, so my money is on her

She is going to be bet down to oblivion, you won't make any money at 1-1 odds.
Fumanchu
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
Canada669 Posts
May 22 2014 21:12 GMT
#17
For my brothers bachelor party, one of the things we did was tape a giant mug to his hand. Then through the course of the night anything poured into the mug he was forced to drink. There are a lot of alcohol combinations that taste awful. The drunker people get, the worse the mix gets.
Easy doesnt fit into grownup life.
ThomasjServo
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
15244 Posts
May 22 2014 21:21 GMT
#18
On May 23 2014 06:12 Fumanchu wrote:
For my brothers bachelor party, one of the things we did was tape a giant mug to his hand. Then through the course of the night anything poured into the mug he was forced to drink. There are a lot of alcohol combinations that taste awful. The drunker people get, the worse the mix gets.

We play a dice game similar to this from time to time. Depending on what you roll you either call the shot, make it, or take it. It can be the same person for any step, so you have to be careful when you are trying to deal a painful shot to someone else. That fact hasn't stopped mustard and rum from meeting in a glass though.
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