I'm not sure how I should start this… I am writing this because I want to rant my feelings in the hope to feel better about myself and not fall as depressed as I normally do when my mood shifts to being sad. I just want to vent what I can't vent sometimes to my family and even my best of friends. I am a passionate person, when I do something and I love it and it has a competitive aspect to the activity, I can't help but be really emotional about it. I am an athlete, maybe not your traditional athlete where I exert a lot of physical pressure on my body and muscles however, I can 100% say that I spend the same amount of emotions into the sport as any other traditional sport like hockey, or football. This game has made me feel the highest points of my life where I can truly say that I am incredibly happy. However, there are other times when I lose and tilt and feel the utmost despair and agony to the point where I feel it's unhealthy for me despite me releasing this negative energy. This also results in physical rage where I'll engage in self-destruction, this isn't just hitting my keyboard or smack myself it's trying to see how much I will hurt myself by punching a brick wall until it hurts too much. Some might say that this is unjustified, to be putting this much emotion into this kind of game. I don't believe the same thing because It's something I spend hours and hours working on. I sacrifice so much of my life, aspects of my life that some people would say are significantly more important, but when you are as passionate as me about this game you'd understand that competition leaves a large place in my life and when you strive and strive and strive but end up failing to another human outmaneuvering me, all I feel is disappointment. I want to continue doing these write ups for my own benefit in hope to be happier playing this game.
I think you may have to take a bit of a step back in my opinion. Most of us here love starcraft and obviously to get good at anything, you must put A LOT of effort into it however I think the way you are venting your frustration with the game is counter productive. You state that you are passionate about SC and thus likely want to improve however raging and hurting yourself really doesn't help. If you lose a ladder game that maybe you had a lead in and then you made a silly mistake or whatever, don't rage. Just keep calm and maybe go make some tea or just relax for 10 seconds or even go do some exercise or something... My point is, getting angry after a game only ruins your mindset and is definitely not the correct way to go. Other than that, I hope you luck in your SC adventures and maybe we will meet on ladder sometime!
You guys don't really have to say anything. I am just posting this to vent to people who actually understand regardless of what they think of me or how they rate this blog.
On April 04 2014 00:25 DashedHopes wrote: You guys don't really have to say anything. I am just posting this to vent to people who actually understand regardless of what they think of me or how they rate this blog.
Self harm is always a poor way of dealing with pent up rage though. The best athletes use the negative energy to play better, or they push their emotions aside until later when they can meditate on them. Esports have a horrid way of not having those portions in the game. There is no time to take a break and deal with frustration, like being benched or a timeout. If you are passionate, you will put all your emotion into what you do. If you are smart you will not indulge your frustrations because they detract most from growth because they curb the hunger to get better.
You are not an athlete like a hockey or football player, and the rest of what you wrote is pretty nuts. Go talk to a therapist dude. You shouldn't be punching bricks because you lost a meaningless game... or punching them for any reason for that matter
you really shouldn't be punching anything for that matter. An esports athlete's hands are his life. Imagine that in a fit of a rage you punched a brick and broke one of your phalanges? That would put you out of commision for like a month, think of all the practice you are missing out on, it would be like commiting professional suicide.
just remember glhf stay in school.
also why did you sign it as Button instead of Dashedhopes? Is this a typo? Also why did you even bother signing it at all? like we can see your name in your post. Also just in case it wasn't a typo, do you have two names? can you get a 3rd?
This is why I am writing this, to release my anger in other forms than punching stuff and hurting myself.
also why did you sign it as Button instead of Dashedhopes? Is this a typo? Also why did you even bother signing it at all? like we can see your name in your post. Also just in case it wasn't a typo, do you have two names? can you get a 3rd?
Just relax and use anger in healthier ways. There is a direct connection between physical and mental health, so my advice is simply to just step away from the computer, go for a walk, jog, whatever, then come back to it. (non harmful) Exercise is always a great way to release endorphin, cool down, and refocus on what you're working on.
You're taking it way too seriously and you're not an athlete. Passionate doesn't mean breaking your hand when you lose a game. Even the best pros have 70% winrates . Nothing is riding on each game except your absurd expectations. Find someone to talk to about anger management and a hobby (that's all it is) that's less rage inducing.
The athlete thing can be debated, shooting is a sport and that doesn't take too much physical exertion.
But just remember this next time your angry, emotional and rational are inversely related. The more emotional you get the more irrational you are. And the more rational you are, the less emotional you are as well.
I just wanted to say like I don't really have that large of a problem. The same issued occurred when I play hockey, call of duty and even though I was a addicted to those games I just stopped playing. The only big problem I have is getting too mad when I don't succeed. If you asked my friends who don't play video games (which is 90% of them) would say that I am probably one of the happiest people they'll meet. I never rage outside of the game and I barely ever reveal to anyone that I rage about it.
EPT
