problems - Page 2
Blogs > MysteryMeat1 |
Paljas
Germany6926 Posts
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Azera
3800 Posts
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packrat386
United States5077 Posts
On December 31 2013 15:23 dravernor wrote This blog though, wat. Also scratching your back and leaving red marks int he shower is raelly satisfying. I find that spell checking your post can also be raelly satisfying. | ||
dravernor
Netherlands6175 Posts
On December 31 2013 22:09 packrat386 wrote: I find that spell checking your post can also be raelly satisfying. I find that typing on a phone in a web browser that doesn't support spell check is less than adequate. Also I don't remember posting that. I might have been half asleep. | ||
MysteryMeat1
United States3288 Posts
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Epishade
United States2267 Posts
1. Stop scratching yourself in the shower. Now I know this may sound difficult, and, for many people, this solution just isn't for them. Who can resist that fatal allure of scratching yourself so hard you get stripes upon exiting the shower? Sometimes you might even scratch because you're itchy. This itchyness could result from a lack of sanitary bathing water or stem from symptoms relating to meth withdrawal. I suggest you stop taking meth either way. Difficulty 4/5 2. Chop off your hands. One of the more popular forms of treatment: chopping off your hands can show immediate long-lasting results for healthier skin. The body is far too delicate for intense shower-scratching sessions. Chop off your hands instead, and save your health for another day. Difficulty 2/5 3. Stop showering. Some people do this naturally. And if it's natural, it must be good for you, right? Not only will you cure your problems for shower-scratching, but you'll also save money on water bills, health insurance, skin creams, and all the other things for which you have problems in your life. Difficulty 1/5 4. Buy a tiger outfit to shower with. Tiger outfits aren't exactly the cheapest thing around these days, but wearing one in the shower will absolutely guarantee you to stop scratching yourself. No longer will you have to settle for those pseudo-stripes that you call scars. With real tiger-fur, you'll be the talk of the bathroom! Difficulty 3/5 5. Don't shower alone. Showering with someone (ie, your girlfriend/siblings/parents etc.) will most assuredly prevent you from making those unsightly gashes into your skin. You wouldn't want someone else to see you now, would you? Now, the tricky part here is getting your siblings/parents to agree to let you shower with them. There's a few paths you can take here. The first one, which I would recommend, is sneaking up to them while they're in the shower so that they wouldn't notice you. Now you can clean yourself and not worry about scratching. The second one, is to explain to them how much money the house would be saving if you showered with them. This would work better for parents, as they usually worry about the bills. The last method I have (and I urge you to find other methods as well. Don't be afraid to try things out!) is to find someone outside of the family to shower with (and I don't just mean Uncle Joe. He doesn't count.). Usually this can take the form of a girl with whom you share feelings with (or maybe it's all one-sided, it doesn't really matter, as long as you shower with her). Difficulty 6/5 I hope these solutions prove valuable for your problems Meat. Do note that I will be here, shall you need further assistance. | ||
MysteryMeat1
United States3288 Posts
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packrat386
United States5077 Posts
On January 01 2014 06:44 MysteryMeat1 wrote: This will be my last post. Wat. Where are you going? | ||
MysteryMeat1
United States3288 Posts
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packrat386
United States5077 Posts
On January 01 2014 14:14 MysteryMeat1 wrote: Implied that i went with the option of cutting my hands off.. Did you? | ||
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