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Active: 10960 users

Pitchfork Preserver Express: MLG Spring

Blogs > Waxangel
Post a Reply
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Waxangel
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
United States33701 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-01 21:22:17
July 01 2013 20:57 GMT
#1
The Pitchfork Preserver

Express

Twitter At The Speed Of Print

Special Edition

Proleague and GSTL to be absorbed into Acer TeamStory Cup following shameful MLG Spring performance

News at a Glance

· MLG to hold first annual progamer handshake seminar

· NSH agree to trade Tassadar to Prime for ByuN's puppy and pack of cigarettes

· INnoVation enjoys weekend off by staring at blank wall for 15 straight hours

· Stream viewer not sure if Axeltoss is making a joke or really fucking hates his co-caster

[image loading]

Following a dismal MLG Spring Championship performance where none of their players managed to reach the final four, Korean esports organizations KeSPA and eSF announced that Proleague and GSTL would immediately cease operations. "After eSF and KeSPA players suffered unspeakable humiliation at the hands of progamers from international teams at MLG Spring, we have decided that we cannot put the future of Korean eSports in peril by continuing to invest in the extremely uncompetitive and fruitless GSTL and Proleague tournaments." read a rare joint-statement from the two leading organizations in Korean StarCraft.

In a move long predicted by many industry experts, the ailing organizations also announced that they would request their member teams be merged into the Acer TeamStory Cup, the premier team competition in the international StarCraft II scene. When contacted for comment, ATC commissioner Dennis "Take" Gehlen seemed supportive of the move.

"The ATC is more than happy to include teams from diverse regions, even if those regions aren't especially competitive in international competition. KeSPA and eSF have many exciting teams with great potential like SK Telecom T1, whose multiple Proleague titles show that they could be ready to compete in the big leagues now. Of course, we can't just have a dozen Koreans teams suddenly competing alongside the likes of Mousesports and Axiom, so we would have to hold a qualifier to see which teams deserve to join ATC Season II."

STX Soul's Dear, sixth place finisher and highest placing KeSPA player at MLG Anaheim also reacted positively upon hearing the news. "It's really hard for a foreigner to beat a Swedish player, so I expected to lose to NaNiwa. But when I lost to a fellow foreigner in Polt, who managed to become extremely good in America despite being a part-time student, I knew that I had hit the limits of Korean training. Even though it's just online, competing against international teams in the ATC should help me improve a lot more than just playing other Koreans in Proleague" said the Protoss player, who had been a key player for STX Soul's playoff campaign. "Who knows, maybe I'll even get a chance to play against Team Property's SjoW in an ace match one day. A guy can dream, can't he?"


Pitchfork Preserver EXPRESS brought to you by salle, stuchiu and WaxAngel.


****
AdministratorHey HP can you redo everything youve ever done because i have a small complaint?
BEARDiaguz
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Australia2362 Posts
July 01 2013 21:01 GMT
#2
that innovation joke is fucking gold jerry, gold.
ProgamerAustralian alcohol user follow @iaguzSC2
Master of DalK
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
Canada1803 Posts
July 01 2013 21:04 GMT
#3
Best pitchfork preserver yet. Well done sir.
@MasterDalK | Maelstrom Entertainment | Streaming Every Esport Under the Sun
Musicus
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany23580 Posts
July 01 2013 21:11 GMT
#4
fucking brilliant

INnoVation enjoys weekend off by staring at blank wall for 15 straight hours


rofl
Maru and Serral are probably top 5.
flagg
Profile Joined October 2010
Sweden123 Posts
July 01 2013 21:13 GMT
#5
Hahaha, poor Dear :D
mnck
Profile Joined April 2010
Denmark1518 Posts
July 01 2013 21:17 GMT
#6
Rofl, bringing shame to all of kespa :DD
@Munck
Boucot
Profile Blog Joined October 2011
France15997 Posts
July 01 2013 21:19 GMT
#7
Hahahaha, oh shit, this is hilarious, the best one so far and by far.
Former SC2 writer for Millenium - twitter.com/Boucot
cchily13
Profile Joined May 2012
70 Posts
July 01 2013 21:20 GMT
#8
Oh god this is amazing Dear's statement is so good
ROOT is reborn!!
Acronysis
Profile Joined November 2011
872 Posts
July 01 2013 21:23 GMT
#9
Innovation joke definitely my favorite. Fun stuff!
The multiplying villanies of man do swarm upon him.
eviltomahawk
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States11135 Posts
July 01 2013 21:25 GMT
#10
NSH should trade the pack of cigs for Bisu.
ㅇㅅㅌㅅ
StarVe
Profile Joined June 2011
Germany13591 Posts
July 01 2013 21:31 GMT
#11
Keep 'em coming, guys. They get better and better.
freerolll
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Belgium1056 Posts
July 01 2013 21:36 GMT
#12
No way im giving up a cute puppy for tassadar
Always give without remembering & always receive without forgetting.
DrPandaPhD
Profile Joined November 2011
5188 Posts
July 01 2013 21:37 GMT
#13
With Tassadar's GSTL record I would also trade him for a puppy ><

Was an entertaining read, the best one so far.
리노크 👑
Yorbon
Profile Joined December 2011
Netherlands4272 Posts
July 01 2013 21:40 GMT
#14
"The ATC is more than happy to include teams from diverse regions, even if those regions aren't especially competitive in international competition."

Laughed quite a bit on this one. Great job again ^^
Ricemagical
Profile Joined November 2010
270 Posts
July 01 2013 22:14 GMT
#15
It's awesome if this is actually going to become a weekly thing :D
Ysellian
Profile Joined December 2010
Netherlands9029 Posts
July 01 2013 22:31 GMT
#16
Haha damn I should stop reading this at 0:30 XD Best one yet!
emanresU
Profile Joined November 2012
Germany393 Posts
July 01 2013 22:37 GMT
#17
· Stream viewer not sure if Axeltoss is making a joke or really fucking hates his co-caster


Has to be the best thing on pitchfork until now good work.
There is nothing more cool than being proud of the things you love. -Sean "Day[9]" Plott
Mikelius
Profile Joined September 2010
Germany517 Posts
July 01 2013 22:39 GMT
#18
Brilliant, keep 'em coming!
Less QQ, more PewPew
GhandiEAGLE
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States20754 Posts
July 01 2013 22:44 GMT
#19
It's always funny to see Waxangel's tweets in extended form ^_^
Oh, my achin' hands, from rakin' in grands, and breakin' in mic stands
tili
Profile Joined July 2012
United States1332 Posts
July 01 2013 22:49 GMT
#20
This is fantastic.
IcookTacos
Profile Joined December 2011
Sweden295 Posts
July 01 2013 22:49 GMT
#21
God damn it I love these so much!
Life | Ryung | Mvp | MarineKing | Jaedong | Bisu | HerO
StarStruck
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
25339 Posts
July 01 2013 22:53 GMT
#22
You had me at the title. What a nightmare! o;
Ettick
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United States2434 Posts
July 01 2013 22:54 GMT
#23
Proleague and GSTL were nice while they lasted I guess
StarMoon
Profile Joined April 2011
Canada682 Posts
July 01 2013 22:59 GMT
#24
Some awesome stuff, keep em coming! :D
FuDDx *
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
United States5018 Posts
July 01 2013 23:00 GMT
#25
Art <3 love that shit!!!

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Balloon-Man-FuDD/237447769616965?ref=hl
DenTenker
Profile Blog Joined March 2013
United States606 Posts
July 01 2013 23:00 GMT
#26
It sounds like INnoVation was really partying it up on his weekend off. Dear's comments are also hilarious.

I love it! Thanks!
If your all in didn't work, you didn't pull the workers.
neoghaleon55
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States7435 Posts
July 01 2013 23:06 GMT
#27
should have been "innovation enjoys weekend off when teammates accidentally pressed his system shutdown button - rebooting innovation took 2 days"
moo...for DRG
Elucidate
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
205 Posts
July 01 2013 23:07 GMT
#28
The Innovation joke, and the Axeltoss one are pure genius. My sides hurt I'm laughing so hard, those short ones were like a one-two-three-four knockout combo, I wasn't prepared for the hilarity.
Welcome to Aslan's Country. Sanctuary Cat on DotA 2.
Hryul
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Austria2609 Posts
July 01 2013 23:10 GMT
#29
On July 02 2013 08:06 neoghaleon55 wrote:
should have been "innovation enjoys weekend off when teammates accidentally pressed his system shutdown button - rebooting innovation took 2 days"

Maybe: Innovation's update caused unexpected trouble. Complete shutdown disguised as "partying hard".
Countdown to victory: 1 200!
Fased
Profile Joined November 2012
United States5 Posts
July 01 2013 23:23 GMT
#30
What's the Axeltoss co-caster joke referencing?
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
Darkdwarf
Profile Blog Joined December 2012
Sweden960 Posts
July 01 2013 23:40 GMT
#31
Brilliant! :D
Teams: IM, Jin Air, Invictus || Players: Maru, GuMiho, INnoVation, Ryung, sOs, Squirtle, NaNiwa, Has, Zoun, Life, Rogue, Dark
Flaele
Profile Joined November 2011
Belgium182 Posts
July 01 2013 23:40 GMT
#32
It's amazingly getting better and better, can't wait for the next one. Awesome.
.
Adonminus
Profile Joined January 2012
Israel543 Posts
July 02 2013 00:06 GMT
#33
The innovation joke rofl. Innovation is sure a beast.
Cele
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Germany4016 Posts
July 02 2013 00:29 GMT
#34
nod bad folks, not bad
Broodwar for life!
Psychonian
Profile Joined March 2012
United States2322 Posts
July 02 2013 00:44 GMT
#35
· NSH agree to trade Tassadar to Prime for ByuN's puppy and pack of cigarettes

· INnoVation enjoys weekend off by staring at blank wall for 15 straight hours


LOL
Trans Rights
DamageControL
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States4222 Posts
July 02 2013 00:46 GMT
#36
easily the best, brilliant
Liquid | SKT
garbanzo
Profile Joined October 2009
United States4046 Posts
July 02 2013 01:27 GMT
#37
Hahahah, InNovation was probably like, "This party is gonna be off the hook!".
Even during difficult times, when I sat down to play the game, there were times where it felt like god has descended down and played [for me].
Proseat
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
Germany5113 Posts
July 02 2013 01:39 GMT
#38
Bogus partying it up! I bet he went all out and picked a wall with a rough irregular pattern surface texture.

5/5
The Rise and Fall of SlayerS -- a timeline: http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=378097
Aerisky
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States12129 Posts
July 02 2013 02:07 GMT
#39
Good as always :D hahahaha
Jim while Johnny had had had had had had had; had had had had the better effect on the teacher.
Flossy
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States870 Posts
July 02 2013 02:20 GMT
#40
I thought the handshake one was really funny :D
etternaonline.com
TheFish7
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
United States2824 Posts
July 02 2013 02:32 GMT
#41
All the stars for you, sir, hilarious!
~ ~ <°)))><~ ~ ~
Alryk
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
United States2718 Posts
July 02 2013 02:42 GMT
#42
This is so unbelievably funny. I love this XD
Team Liquid, IM, ViOlet!
RaiKageRyu
Profile Joined August 2009
Canada4773 Posts
July 02 2013 03:24 GMT
#43
Everything is gold.
Someone call down the Thunder?
damahammer
Profile Joined May 2010
Germany111 Posts
July 02 2013 03:32 GMT
#44
this is lame tbh, don't forget it's the first time for the 3 kespa players to play overseas, or 2nd time if you count that one even in WoL
Daogin
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
Canada2308 Posts
July 02 2013 03:46 GMT
#45
On July 02 2013 12:32 damahammer wrote:
this is lame tbh, don't forget it's the first time for the 3 kespa players to play overseas, or 2nd time if you count that one even in WoL

Someone didnt get the jokes.
Leenoctopus <3, master of foreign events.
DavoS
Profile Blog Joined October 2012
United States4605 Posts
July 02 2013 03:50 GMT
#46
Love the Innovation joke.
"KDA is actually the most useless stat in the game" Aui_2000
eviltomahawk
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States11135 Posts
July 02 2013 04:53 GMT
#47
On July 02 2013 10:39 Proseat wrote:
Bogus partying it up! I bet he went all out and picked a wall with a rough irregular pattern surface texture.

5/5

Bogus studying Terran wall-ins by closely studying real walls. True innovation.
ㅇㅅㅌㅅ
Daswollvieh
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
5553 Posts
July 02 2013 06:13 GMT
#48
Poor Innovation, I´m sure he has many hobbies, like... you know, like ... and also... well he is good at Starcraft.
Traceback
Profile Joined October 2010
United States469 Posts
July 02 2013 06:24 GMT
#49
On July 02 2013 13:53 eviltomahawk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 02 2013 10:39 Proseat wrote:
Bogus partying it up! I bet he went all out and picked a wall with a rough irregular pattern surface texture.

5/5

Bogus studying Terran wall-ins by closely studying real walls. True innovation.

Rofl. Nice.
Maegi
Profile Joined January 2013
Finland174 Posts
July 02 2013 07:33 GMT
#50
ROFL this keeps getting better every time
NaNiwa <3
Ketch
Profile Joined October 2010
Netherlands7285 Posts
July 02 2013 07:50 GMT
#51
Hehe, very funny all in all
[]Phase[]
Profile Joined September 2010
Belgium927 Posts
July 02 2013 08:31 GMT
#52
hahahha loved it
Xivsa
Profile Joined April 2011
United States1009 Posts
July 02 2013 08:57 GMT
#53
The INnoVation one, too good lol
I don't know half of you half as well as I should like and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. - Bilbo
NKB
Profile Joined February 2012
United Kingdom608 Posts
July 02 2013 09:56 GMT
#54
This is just brilliant, you just have to keep making these Waxangel
Some times you just gotta wish...
hidetoaizen
Profile Joined January 2013
Norway460 Posts
July 02 2013 12:36 GMT
#55
the Innovation joke made my day :D
Nal_rA | Stork | MKP | ㅇㅅㅌㅅ | Shine | do your best whatever whenever wherever ! - LiquidHerO | I don't know about any other day, but today I'm the champion of the world - SouL_Dear
DusTerr
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
2520 Posts
July 02 2013 14:38 GMT
#56
MORE!!!!!!
Incognoto
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
France10239 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-02 15:57:13
July 02 2013 15:56 GMT
#57
I want to see a picture of Byun's puppy, if that's ok.


I got what I wanted, so I'm sharing:

[image loading]
maru lover forever
Holdenintherye
Profile Joined December 2012
Canada1441 Posts
July 02 2013 22:20 GMT
#58
I for one hopes that the handshake seminar becomes a real thing
Cricketer12
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States14003 Posts
July 02 2013 22:57 GMT
#59
is the innovation thing a reference to something?
Engage, Zero target Engage, Engage, Kagari target Engage, Engage.
kochanfe
Profile Joined July 2011
Micronesia1338 Posts
July 02 2013 23:15 GMT
#60
OH my god this one is sooo fucking good. hahahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahaah
"The flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long." - Lao Tzu
kochanfe
Profile Joined July 2011
Micronesia1338 Posts
July 02 2013 23:16 GMT
#61
On July 03 2013 07:57 Cricketer12 wrote:
is the innovation thing a reference to something?

Just how robotic and boring he comes off in interviews and onstage haha
"The flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long." - Lao Tzu
quannguyen
Profile Joined January 2012
Vietnam1390 Posts
July 03 2013 05:54 GMT
#62
This is just pure gold. Well played Wax :p
Unlimited Warcraft Works and Super Starcraft Taisen ^^
HonorZ
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
France858 Posts
July 03 2013 07:51 GMT
#63
What about the Axeltoss joke ??? I didn't follow that story !
"If you don't drop sweat today you'll drop tears tomorrow"
[F_]aths
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Germany3947 Posts
July 03 2013 10:53 GMT
#64
Can someone explain the Innovation joke?
You don't choose to play zerg. The zerg choose you.
KirA_TheGreaT
Profile Joined April 2011
France204 Posts
July 03 2013 11:47 GMT
#65
On July 03 2013 19:53 [F_]aths wrote:
Can someone explain the Innovation joke?


read his interview : http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=418616
RaZorwire
Profile Joined April 2012
Sweden718 Posts
July 03 2013 12:53 GMT
#66
On July 02 2013 05:57 Waxangel wrote:"Who knows, maybe I'll even get a chance to play against Team Property's SjoW in an ace match one day. A guy can dream, can't he?"


Hahahaha, so good. Well done.
Shinespark
Profile Joined June 2011
Chile843 Posts
July 03 2013 21:23 GMT
#67
Hilarious
"I, for one, welcome our new Korean overlords."
slowbacontron
Profile Joined October 2012
United States7722 Posts
July 04 2013 02:34 GMT
#68
If I had removable buttocks, they would have fallen off by the first paragraph. These continue to be quality articles.
jjakji fan
eieio
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States14512 Posts
July 04 2013 06:37 GMT
#69
· Stream viewer not sure if Axeltoss is making a joke or really fucking hates his co-caster

holy shit LOL

gg wp sick article. Please keep posting!
LiquidDota Staff
TL+ Member
Koshi
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Belgium38799 Posts
July 04 2013 12:13 GMT
#70
This one is indeed quite good.
I had a good night of sleep.
[F_]aths
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Germany3947 Posts
July 05 2013 16:56 GMT
#71
On July 03 2013 20:47 KirA_TheGreaT wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 03 2013 19:53 [F_]aths wrote:
Can someone explain the Innovation joke?


read his interview : http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=418616

I read it, but still don't get it.
You don't choose to play zerg. The zerg choose you.
slowbacontron
Profile Joined October 2012
United States7722 Posts
July 05 2013 21:04 GMT
#72
On July 06 2013 01:56 [F_]aths wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 03 2013 20:47 KirA_TheGreaT wrote:
On July 03 2013 19:53 [F_]aths wrote:
Can someone explain the Innovation joke?


read his interview : http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=418616

I read it, but still don't get it.

Given his interviews, he isn't much of a do things with flair guy, just a win Starcraft kind of guy.
jjakji fan
Nuclease
Profile Joined August 2011
United States1049 Posts
July 05 2013 22:56 GMT
#73
Fucking love it.
Zealots, not zee-lots. | Never forget, KTViolet, Go)Space. | You will never be as good as By.Flash, and your drops will never be as sick as MMA.
[F_]aths
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Germany3947 Posts
July 06 2013 11:09 GMT
#74
On July 06 2013 06:04 slowbacontron wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 06 2013 01:56 [F_]aths wrote:
On July 03 2013 20:47 KirA_TheGreaT wrote:
On July 03 2013 19:53 [F_]aths wrote:
Can someone explain the Innovation joke?


read his interview : http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=418616

I read it, but still don't get it.

Given his interviews, he isn't much of a do things with flair guy, just a win Starcraft kind of guy.

Ah okay.
You don't choose to play zerg. The zerg choose you.
Skynx
Profile Blog Joined January 2013
Turkey7150 Posts
July 06 2013 22:03 GMT
#75
/clap wax
"When seagulls follow the troller, it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea. Thank you very much" - King Cantona | STX 4 eva
Pazuzu
Profile Joined July 2011
United States632 Posts
July 10 2013 13:32 GMT
#76
oh my god this is absolutely glorious I love this every time it comes out
"It is because intuition is sometimes right, that we don't know what to do with it"
NihilisticGod
Profile Joined March 2011
Northern Ireland174 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-12 21:29:48
July 12 2013 21:28 GMT
#77
another great edition, really top notch reporting :D

keep it coming!
Too weird to live... too rare to die.
pieroog
Profile Joined June 2010
Poland146 Posts
July 22 2013 08:26 GMT
#78
Axeltoss joke - what does it refer to?
Normal
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