If you want to be great, if you want things to be different, if you are not happy with where things are or if you just want to be better than you are right now; then you need to change your life and that change starts with you. I do not know what your goals are, but I do know that most successful people keep changing themselves for the better, keep on changing and adapting to what life throws at them.
The thought of change can be daunting and it can be challenging, but it is the only way to make your life better than what it is now. Perhaps you are afraid of change because you are content with what you have, but personally I don't think I have come across anyone that didn't want something new or more, whether it be a new car or girlfriend. Maybe it's just that your goals aren't really what you truly want, so your motivation for change just isn't there. What I say is, know what you truly want and try to change yourself so that you can achieve it.
If you want change you can't do it half heartedly; for example, you want to lose weight so you start forcing yourself to run every now and then. This won't work because you will eventually burn out and lose motivation. If you want change it begins with your state of mind, you need to convince your subconscious mind that you really want this change. When you really want it, that's when you'll be successful. The mind is a powerful thing, whether you believe you can do it or not, you are right.
The first step to change is to create a conscious mind, a positive state of mind. You create a conscious mind by taking full responsibility of yourself and everything that happens to you and creating your path instead of just going with the flow and blaming shit on everything else such as: your parents, bad luck, bad friends, bad genes, etc. Taking full responsibility of yourself makes you more conscious, which makes you more alive, which makes you more in control and gives more power to yourself. E.g. instead of saying "My teacher sucks that's why my grades are bad", say "I can still get good grades if I study that little bit harder"; instead of saying "I can't talk to girls because they won't like me", say "I will make myself so irresistible, that girls will come after me". Some of your positive thoughts might be a long shot away, but these thoughts give you power to change your life instead of doing nothing and just blaming it on something else.
The next step is to set specific goals and always keeping them in mind. E.g. you want to shed some weight and get a six pack. Every time you do something keep your goal in mind and ask yourself will this affect your goal, like when deciding when to sleep, if you have your goal in mind then you can make great decisions such as sleeping early so you can wake up early and go for a run before you start your day. It is very important that your goals are what you truly want, deep down.
Lets say that you worked your ass off for half a year and have a decent body. Then comes along a person who doesn't watch what he eats, only exercises every now and then but has an amazingly fit body. Contrary to what you think, you probably won't be jealous. Why? Because when you try so hard to do something, you will grow to love it, even if it isn't perfect. When you cook a meal, you'd prefer it over some Iron Chef meal just because you put in the hard work and it is your own work. You will have more respect and acceptance for yourself when you are defining your own path. When you don't love your life, it's probably because the path you're on is influenced more by someone else than it was by you. You will love yourself when you start putting great effort into your life. The end result of change is becoming the best that you possibly can, the end goal is important, but the journey (where the effort is spent) is much more important than the end result because it's what defines your character and who you are.
"It's like you have to save your own life, because no ones going to save it for you, so you have to do what you have to do, no matter what it is" -Forgot who is was
Disclaimer: A lot (if not all) of these ideas are from many sources such as articles and books, but this is my own viewpoint in my own words.
We are already Great, but we believe we are not, and we keep inventing ourself into a "better" version, keep inventing personality traits that only serves one purpose, to seperate from our own Greatness, and from our brothers.
I tried all the things you wrote, for 8-10 years I searched. I eventually went to a shrink because of my ladder anxiety of playing WC3. I wanted so bad to play this game, and it really troubled me that I just had too much anxiety for it to be fun. After 3-4 years in private therapy, I still suffered from ladder anxiety (and also in life, although any shrink would call me very healthy). What truly helped me, and is still curing me, is the idea of Peace of Mind, instead of a positive mind. When you are at peace, the Mind truly shines. You get in a state where you experience having everything, and are everything. You have finally let go of the idea of getting more, and inventing a better version of yourself. You let go of growing, because you experience as finally being home, and can relax and just enjoy life, moment for moment. Positive outcome, success and winning becomes so tiny in comparison to what peace of mind gives you. Keep in mind that the smallest upset is equally disturbing to your peace of mind.
This Peace of Mind is absolutely possible, because I am my own proof of this, and I have successfully cured my own ladder anxiety, after so many years of trying the wrong things. You do not need to stop doing what your doing, but instead change how you look at it, how you identify with what you are not. Your own selfmade self (which we can refer to as the ego, because it wants to seperate), believes that you can be bored if you do not do its bidding, that Peace is boring and makes you restless. You are right when you say that the focus should be on your Mind, not the world, that you should take responsibility for your own thinking. You only have a tiny error when it comes to what state of mind you want. You are so close, and you may not be ready to truly want Peace of Mind yet, but it will come when you realize that your path of more is not leading you anywhere.
I wish you all the best in your journey, it truly is beautiful, because you will find what your looking for.
first you do. then after youve done it, you stop doing. u cant stop something if uve never started it. can u truly be content with something u never have? or unless u totally understand what it is to be able to content yourself. u can try but your heart wont be at peace.
it worked for you because uve done it for 8-10 years. then u stop. because uve done it enuf. however for some people, they need to work at it first b4 being able to be content. i agree with both post
On April 04 2013 07:35 boomudead1 wrote: first you do. then after youve done it, you stop doing. u cant stop something if uve never started it. can u truly be content with something u never have? or unless u totally understand what it is to be able to content yourself. u can try but your heart wont be at peace.
it worked for you because uve done it for 8-10 years. then u stop. because uve done it enuf. however for some people, they need to work at it first b4 being able to be content. i agree with both post
teach me.
Yes, for me I had to try all this for all these years, not because I got something out of it, but because I was finally ready and willing to say "there must be another way". This is more a state of mind statement. I believed that I had to get something, that I was born naked without anything, and only human growth in abilities would make me experience greatness. What I found out, was that I was born with everything, and had thrown it away because I believed I had nothing. It's all in the mind, the rewards, the peace, the greatness of living. My belief in our seperation from other people, that we are unique and special, kept me in a fearful state. Winners and losers, rich and poor. All this I was willing to truly question within me as my own beliefs, and when I became willing to let go if it, it was just gone, and it was beautiful. What can you lose by just trying to give up this belief? But you will see this for yourself. Try out all the things this world offers you, and you will see how lackluster it really is yourself. Then you have prepared your own willingness to see the greatness that you simply are without having to get it.
As you read this text, your beliefs may tell you that I am trying to drag you down too "my level", that I have thrown in the towel and want everyone else to do the same. This is not the case. You can not take anothers path, as your own. But we can be unified in our goal in peace of mind. Remember, the smallest upset is equally disturbing to your peace of mind, and you will not experience the richness of your mind if it is not at full peace. And it is actually really easy to obtain if you are willing to let go of your beliefs in fear/separation.
Sounds like what you're seeking is something similar to nirvana, you say it's really easy to obtain but whenever you achieve something and look back it usually seems easier to achieve since you now have the knowledge of how to achieve it. For me, I somewhat agree with boomudead1, seems really hard to just let go, I need to chase something more definite if that makes any sense.
On April 05 2013 17:36 We Are Here wrote: Sounds like what you're seeking is something similar to nirvana, you say it's really easy to obtain but whenever you achieve something and look back it usually seems easier to achieve since you now have the knowledge of how to achieve it. For me, I somewhat agree with boomudead1, seems really hard to just let go, I need to chase something more definite if that makes any sense.
This is where it gets interesting actually. When I first had this Nirvana state of mind, where Happiness and Love just flowed in me, I thought a few hours later how did I achieve this? What did I do right to get this? This Love is so strong and good, that it was the only thing I ever wanted from that point on. My realization was that I can not use my past experience to get to this State, because it is in the moment that it can only exist. New thoughts arrived that needed to be dealt with. For example, thoughts that I would never get this again, this can not last etc. All of these are false, but I needed to let go of them, and then I really did see them as false. Letting go is experienced as very intense, because you do not know what is waiting you. You believe in losses, so you are afraid to lose your belief. The only reason it is very easy for me, is because my Trust has increased in letting go.
An example on this. There is someone you can not stand, that you hate. Lets say a family member who have done you harm in the past, that you still do not like. You experience discomfort just the thought of him/her. You first realize that you no longer want to experience this, because it is a hateful block, disturbing your peace, and preventing Love to enter you. Having willed to change your way, you now have willingness to change, willingness to let go. It is still scary to let go, but you Will it. You then accept responsibility for your own thoughts. You are the one who have the attack thoughts on the person who you hate. Your own thoughts are harming you, not the person. You are preserving the past, to the present moment, filling it with hate. You decide that you are willing to let go of your attack thoughts of this person, your humbleness is your strenght in this. You do not ask to understand why you hate, you are just willing to let it go. You said it in your post, the willingness to change yourself, and not blaming it on others. So coming this far, you can no let go of something, and your trust in increasing in the process of letting go.
If this is still difficult, this is where the ability to set goals come in. Typical, goals are used in the context of success in the world outside of yourself, or to gain certain abilities. Praying which is the same, is used to have success in attaining peace of mind. The power of praying/goalsetting are something most are willing to see. You only get what you truly want however. Often it is stated in muscle magazine "How bad do you want it?". The answer is often for us, we dont want it at all, but we believe we want it, and this does not make the Will authentic.
I will you the best on your path. Whatever you choose, it is working for the greater good of you. It can only make you more ready and willing. There will be a turning point where you no longer want to be hard on yourself anymore.
i agree with everything said. its all a process. first you grab on to it. once its enuf, then u let go. i just want to say that you cant let it go if uve never held it. its a path that we ll eventually get to. for some people it takes time. The point is how far do u have to go untill u finally realize. all depend on each person. some can take shortcuts. some has to go a full circle. crappen u came early. congrat
@we are here. i agree. once we have enuf knowledge about it. thats when we do what crappen said. learn as much about it as possible. once u think its enuf. then ur done.
Can you cite specific examples of you doing this? Otherwise, I feel like these are meaningless words with no credibility. And if you haven't done this, then what is the point of this Blog?
first, define for me.... "succesfull people" in regards to your blog... And second, u are wrong that people need to take ful responsibility to themselves. Such bullshit, tell that to all the warvictims.. yeah right... U dont control everything in your life and how situations turn out, believe me. It's total freaking BS. 3rd, u can frame everything in anyway u like with this amatur psychology shit, but then u will be lying to yourself aswell.
As I have experienced, the most happy people just dont care, if u dont care, u are basiccaly the most happy person on the planet. Any shit that happens, ahhh well move on. Now that, is the true guide to happiness..
On April 07 2013 13:52 govie wrote: Very motivational but all very relative....
first, define for me.... "succesfull people" in regards to your blog... And second, u are wrong that people need to take ful responsibility to themselves. Such bullshit, tell that to all the warvictims.. yeah right... U dont control everything in your life and how situations turn out, believe me. It's total freaking BS. 3rd, u can frame everything in anyway u like with this amatur psychology shit, but then u will be lying to yourself aswell.
As I have experienced, the most happy people just dont care, if u dont care, u are basiccaly the most happy person on the planet. Any shit that happens, ahhh well move on. Now that, is the true guide to happiness..
lighten up, shit happens
You are right here, I think what I meant was the best way to move forward is to accept where you are at, and a lot of the time the best way to do this is by taking responsibility for why you are where you are. I have lighten up a lot the past few years, I'm quite happy ATM =]. My definition of successful people are people around me (mainly friends) that are happiest, and although there isn't any real correlation but these people are also the most successful in terms of career, romance, etc.
On April 06 2013 13:15 Chill wrote: Can you cite specific examples of you doing this? Otherwise, I feel like these are meaningless words with no credibility. And if you haven't done this, then what is the point of this Blog?
On April 07 2013 13:52 govie wrote: Very motivational but all very relative....
first, define for me.... "succesfull people" in regards to your blog... And second, u are wrong that people need to take ful responsibility to themselves. Such bullshit, tell that to all the warvictims.. yeah right... U dont control everything in your life and how situations turn out, believe me. It's total freaking BS. 3rd, u can frame everything in anyway u like with this amatur psychology shit, but then u will be lying to yourself aswell.
As I have experienced, the most happy people just dont care, if u dont care, u are basiccaly the most happy person on the planet. Any shit that happens, ahhh well move on. Now that, is the true guide to happiness..
lighten up, shit happens
You are right here, I think what I meant was the best way to move forward is to accept where you are at, and a lot of the time the best way to do this is by taking responsibility for why you are where you are. I have lighten up a lot the past few years, I'm quite happy ATM =]. My definition of successful people are people around me (mainly friends) that are happiest, and although there isn't any real correlation but these people are also the most successful in terms of career, romance, etc.
Ofcourse, your blogpost has alot of meaning in certain situations. And yes it could be motivational for those people
EPT
